Jason Kellerman kissed you?
Claire Keane

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@liptyrell
Jason Kellerman kissed you?
Thank you. Anything less and I would think something is wrong with you. Despite how annoying you can be when you don’t shut up and answer my questions, it would be too weird for you to be civilized.
You leave yourself open to these comments by only having hot dogs and buns in the house. I can be very civilized if the situation calls for it. Hot dogs at my girlfriends house doesn't call for it.
I do not want to clean that, I’ll stop bugging you. I was telling you what there is to eat, it’s not my fault if you can’t focus and go hungry.
Thank you. Fine, hot dogs. We can have hot dogs. But don't blame me if I make jokes about wieners in buns.
Well, shame on me. You being sappy is cute. I love you too, which is wy I appreciat the sappiness so very much. Will you explode if I get you to do it again? I have some leftover Chinese take out if you want any. Or hot dogs.
Pretty much. There will be guts and innards everywhere and you don't want to get stuck cleaning that up do you? You're just making this too easy for me now. Hot dogs, really?
I do know it. Is that what I was doing? I thought I was just being honest, but I don’t mind you being sappy. Sappy’s cute on you, though. Maybe I will, maybe I won’t. You’ll have to stick around to see. Are you hungry or not? I can just get you the vodka from the cupboard, but I’m going to eat something.
It was what you were doing. Sappy is never cute. It's sappy. You only get it because I love you. And now that's three times so that's my limit. Depends on what you have to eat? I should probably eat before any drinking.
No, that just proves how much you want to be with me, whether you tease about being desired by others or not. You make me happy. I couldn’t care less about anybody else. I’m pretty sure all you hear ever is innuendos.
If I didn't want to be with you. I wouldn't. It's as simple as that and you know it. You're trying to make me sappy twice in one day, I can feel it. But fine. I'm glad I make you happy, I only ever want you to be happy, it's what you deserve. Pretty much, you'll get used to it, eventually.
I thought I was wooing you into staying with all my incredible charms. You forget that I’m a catch, too. But it just so happens you’re the guy would actually killed to be with me, so I don’t plan on leaving you any time soon. Whatever it is, you should get it fixed.
That too. I'm insulted. Are you only staying with me because of that? I wouldn't kill someone if they made you happy. You just have a history with douche bags. Nah, I like hearing innuendos in everything you say.
I’m sure you will. I hope I didn’t use up all of my luck to get you in the first place. Did your ears go when the bombs dropped?
I'm handy like that. 'Course not. You're using it all to keep me. I'm a catch, women approach me every day wanting my love. Possibly. Or it's selective hearing.
I will, maybe there was something in it that ruinedit. I deserve to be reimbursed. I was lucky enough in the first place, wasn’t I? I figured as much.
If they don't give you one, I'll go make them give you one. You were, and you're lucky you have me altogether. Did you just ask me to finger you?
I’ll have to get my money back, then. Only if I’m very lucky. Don’t get ahead of yourself, I had plans for this evening.
You should. Blame the bombings for it's ineffectiveness. You'll have to be very, very lucky. All I heard was head and I stopped listening.
It’s the botox, I can’t stop smiling for another four hours. One is all I need. What do you want to eat?
Right. Well they did a shitty job because you still have all those wrinkles. Since it's a weird day, you might get a second later. I could eat you.
Sad to hear you’re not here for my company, just the food. Lucky for you, I restocked the fridge yesterday.
You don't look very sad. Besides, you already got my one out pour of affection, that's it for the day.
Maybe I should make you clean. I definitely have food and booze, though.
Or I could not do that. And that's basically why I'm here. Your not dead and you've got food, it was a good choice.
You can stay here instead, I’ll find you something worthwhile to do.
That was my plan. You've got food and booze. If it's cleaning, I'll be very disappointed.
Not unless you’re gonna rob the people who are out running around like headless chickens. I don’t think that’s your style.
Not really. I'm not a looter, that just seems petty. I could go collect some corpses but that doesn't seem like much fun either.
I feel like I missed something.
Groaning, Alec rolled over, chucking the lamp she kept next to her bed on a nightstand in his direction. You suck.
He ducked, the lamp barely missing his head. I'm more of a licker.
But seriously, hurry the fuck up.