Ω carter & six
The awkwardness that hung in the air around them was tangible, and he almost wanted to swing a fist into the air to punch a hole in it. “Pulled me out of the wreckage of the Pelican," he answered. That’s what they told him. “I was knocked out. Next time I woke up, I was in a hospital… with these, uh, additions." He gestured to the steel arm and metal encasing his eye. He could see her unasked questions in her pointed stare, and he shook his head softly.
"I asked if they got anyone else out. I was met with a negative," Carter responded, lowering his eyes. “I’m sorry." He wasn’t quite sure why he was apologizing. There was nothing he could’ve done. Was it sentiment that drove him to say such a useless thing? However many times he said sorry wouldn’t bring Kat back. He’d never hear Emile’s raucous laughter after a particularly crude joke. He’d never be able to listen to Jorge hum some soft Hungarian lullabies. The team was lost, and his efforts were better focused elsewhere.
It wasn’t right for a commander to dwell on the past, and Carter knew that.
Heaving a sigh, he pulled a chair up and sat down beside her, hunched over with his elbows digging into his knees and chin in his hands, the position requiring him to look up in order to speak to her.
"If it were up to me, I would’ve done anything to get them back."
"I know." The words were simple, but meant something far more elaborate than what was verbally said. She knew that he would've done anything to save them all. She knew that he would have to bear the guilt of their deaths for the rest of his life. She knew that all though he was strong enough to deal with this pain, there would be some part of him that doubted whether or not he was a capable leader to them all.
And he was, at least to her.
In the short span of their professional contact, she found that Carter was a strong man, formidable mentally and physically and a natural leader, however that came to be about. "It was never your fault," she continued, and reached out to grab his shoulder, surprised at how warm the metal was compared to his flesh.
"We do what we have to for our own, and you did the best you could."
They hadn't failed, technically. They got Cortana out, and, although the planet was glassed, at least two members of the Noble Team survived to tell the tale.
"Do you... Do you wanna get drinks later?" she suggested, after a brief pause. "To catch up, y'know? I mean, it's been five years. Something's had to have happened during that time."
