A L I V E ;

Luca Radovan. 31. District 7.

[lucaradovan]

All You Need || River

[lucaradovan]

river-nereus:

She let him roll them over, now laying on her back with Luca above her. Honestly, she was tired of pretending for the Capitol, too. For Snow. Tired of being worried constantly that they would be found out, that Luca would get hurt because of her. They were both going into the Arena, anyway, sent in with most of the other Victors to fight once again. What other threat was there hanging over their heads now? And Luca was right, even if they talked or made up rumors, what she and Luca had was still theirs. She didn’t like keeping him hidden away like he was some big secret. “I’m tired of hiding, too,” she murmured. Her head tilted back, her body giving a small shiver at his lips trailing up her throat. Then their lips met in a tender kiss her hand cupping the back of his head and trailing down the side of his neck. “I don’t want what we have to be some deep, dark secret. Not anymore.”

It didn’t matter anymore. Any of it. The talk was all trivial. The Capitol people couldn’t muddle into their lives further anyway. Not beyond the Arena. This was all the time they’d get. This was all the time he and River would have left to spend together. He didn’t want to waste the energy in continuing to try and hide in plain sight. It wasn’t worth what they’d lose in doing so - and that was being together. Every moment they had left, every moment they could. Luca smiled at her reaction, at each in fact. The way she responded to his words as well as his lips. “Then the secrecy is over with,” he replied simply, bringing a hand to cup her face and caress her cheek with his thumb lovingly. He could spend hours caught up in her - kissing her, gazing at her, worshipping her.

[lucaradovan]

All You Need || River

[lucaradovan]

river-nereus:

Her expression softened at his reply. The best sleep she got were in the nights when she would sneak into Luca’s room, or vice versa, and they just held each other through the night. The nightmares of their Games were inescapable, but whenever she woke up from a nightmare and found herself in his arms, River felt safe. Soon enough, they would be right back in the Arena. Together. Either dying together, or one of them coming out of the Quell alive.

It was selfish of her to tell Luca the other day that he could live without her. It was true she couldn’t stand the thought of him dying, of being without him. But if anyone was coming out of the Arena, she wanted it to be Luca. And if he died in the Arena, she was going to follow him. Life without him wasn’t a life. He was all she had; her sister had been killed, her parents wanted little to nothing to do with her and her ‘blood money’. River wanted none of it, either, but she never had a choice. All she wanted was a life with Luca. To leave Panem and The Capitol behind and just go. But even leaving ran the risk of endless fear of getting caught by The Capitol. Having their tongues cut out, or worse.

“Much better with you,” she replied, scooting herself a little closer to his side to close the gap between them. Her arms wrapped around him, finger tips dancing along his spine and tracing over his shoulders. Despite the circumstances, she did manage to get a better night’s sleep. But it didn’t make their current situation any easier to swallow.

She brought a hand up to brush a few strands of dark hair back from his face, a small smile set on her face as she gazed up at him so fondly. She wished this moment would last forever. That they would grow old together, waking up every morning just like this. Soon enough, the harsh reality of it all would interrupt them when their stylists and escorts would try to seek them out for the Tribute Parade. But she tried to push that from her mind for now, devote the little time she had to the man in her arms.

Being so close to Luca brought on a feeling of safety and content that she hadn’t felt anywhere else. With anyone else. He was one of very few that she trusted, and the only man she loved dearly.

“I’d love to just stay here all day with you, just like this,” she chuckled, leaning up to press a gentle kiss to the corner of his lips, then another along his jawline.

“Mm,” he hummed contentedly at both her response and the feeling of her arms around him, and her fingertips running along his skin. The sensation of sparks trailing in their wake. He wanted nothing more than to spend the day with her just like that as well. “Me too, darling.” Luca grinned, leaning to reciprocate and kiss her softly, hand cupping her face and thumb stroking her cheek as he did so. “I’m tired of pretending for them, River. Let ‘em say what they want. It’s still ours, it’s still us.” He shifted then, moving over top of her while still supporting his own weight. He placed a kissed upon her collarbone then traced slightly parted lips up the center of her throat before properly kissing her.

[lucaradovan]

Luca & River; Affection

[lucaradovan]

All You Need || River

[lucaradovan]

river-nereus:

Ever since The Reaping, River’s thoughts had been restless. Not only because she was going back into the Arena, but because Luca was going back in with her. And that meant only one of them was coming out alive. Even though they had agreed they would find a way out together, if any opportunity came, or they would even die together, River still found her stomach in knots and having the worst time trying to sleep. But when Luca had started sleeping in her bed, it made sleep come easier. She didn’t care anymore about any rumors they started upon their arrival at The Capitol, no longer felt the need to hide her love for him. If Snow was throwing them both in the Arena, he couldn’t use Luca as leverage over her. After all, District Seven still needed its male Tribute.

She was tired of all the Games. Tired of trying to follow the rules and keeping her head down while Snow forced her to sleep with strangers. Living this fake glamorous life and being praised for murdering kids. Tired of having to hide her feelings toward Luca, so sick of living in such fear. Fear of losing her family, of losing him. If she lost him, then River truly lost everything. The thought had her nestled up close to his side, arms wrapped around Luca and her face buried in his chest.

River was in one of her more peaceful slumbers that morning. It was the morning of the Tribute parade, where they would ride through The Capitol before arriving in the Training Center. That didn’t bother her much, but it was just another step closer to them being in the Arena. She didn’t want to think on it too much, just enjoy the time she had with Luca, especially the nights they spent together. Even though they both still made the effort to keep things between them private, she couldn’t hide her love for him anymore. Not when they had so little time.

This was supposed to be the rest of their lives. Waking up together, going out together. Growing old together. Just the two of them together. Not being forced into the Arena together, forced to die together. Because even if they had a plan to get out, Snow would find a way to kill them all before it would even start. Still, River clung to the chance that maybe they would get their out. Somehow. Even if it was just a small sliver of a chance.

The kiss to the top of her head cleared the thoughts from her mind, slightly loosened the tight hold she had on him so suddenly. Her head lifted slightly, eyes fluttering open. Her gaze was still tired when she met his own. Seeing him staring down at her so fondly softened her expression, her head leaning against his shoulder. “Morning,” she murmured softly, a small smile curling at the corners of her lips. “How did you sleep?” Hopefully not as restlessly as she had.

It was tough to ignore, the constant flurry of invading thoughts and worries that plagued his mind at nearly every waking moment now. Only made worse the closer they drew to The Quell itself. He’d begun having nightmares of his first Games again, ones that had finally since ceased to haunt him most nights  thanks to River, really. But then he’d also started having new ones, fearing for the virtually limitless possibilities that lay ahead of them. Losing her was by far Luca’s biggest fear and also the central theme of his newly recurring nightmares.

Of course.

He knew he wasn’t the only one suffering. He wasn’t the only one startled awake as a result of their own mental horrors from past experience and memory. And then also the apprehension of what was to come.

Twenty-four went in, only one would come out. It was how the Games worked. They would not make the same mistake as the 74th Games. In fact, they were working to correct that very mistake. The one that started the domino effect to lead them all right here - heading back in the Arena. Luca had said they’d find a way out of it together. He hoped they would. But he wasn’t any under any delusion that it would actually happen. How could any of them really escape Snow’s clutches?

Luca was prepared to die. To hurl himself into harm’s way to protect and keep River alive. That was what he’d planned to do. And despite her protest of not wanting a life without him, he wouldn’t let her die. He couldn’t possibly stand by and let it happen. Not while he was still breathing. He’d walk out of there with her, or not at all. He wasn’t counting on any miracles either. He’d already been lucky enough to survive his first Games. And fall in love with an amazing woman. His luck was bound to run out eventually. It already had, otherwise neither himself nor River would have been heading to what would likely be their execution.

She stirred shortly after him and he hoped it wasn’t because of him that she did since he hadn’t meant to disturb her seemingly peaceful slumber. He just couldn’t help himself. Not when his days were numbered. Not when he loved her so, and he did. She was beautiful and embodied everything that made him happy. He needed her. “Morning,” he cooed softly in response to her with a warm smile of his own, tracing his fingers along her bare skin. “Always better with you than without,” Luca admitted casually, like reciting some well-known fact. “How about you?”

If only the moment could remain suspended in time forever. Before reality would inevitably come crashing back to them. Before they'd be forced to remove themselves from one another and oblige the traditions of The Games. They wouldn’t even come looking for him in his assigned quarters. They’d simply send for him there when they needed him to prepare for the parade.

[lucaradovan]

All You Need || River

@river-nereus

Luca had spent the night in River’s bed since setting foot on the train after his district’s Reaping. He knew he wouldn’t sleep otherwise. Not with the unsettling feeling of impending doom sitting on his chest. And where he used to be careful and sneaky about his night’s spent with her previously, he no longer cared to waste such time and effort. Not with where they were going. He spent every moment he possibly could with her. The rumors, of course, had already begun cropping up again upon arriving at The Capitol.

It didn’t matter. None of it did. It was all so trivial, so exhausting. The dog-and-pony show. Luca was tired of dancing and jumping through hoops for them. He was tired of the Games. The show. The gross ruling and entertainment of the differing masses that made up their presently corrupted world. Something had to be done. All the rampant thoughts and emotions kept him awake at night more often than not. But what sleep he did get was made more peaceful by River’s presence beside him.

The morning of the tribute parade he awoke with the sun, eyes fluttering open to a tangle of sheets and limbs as River was tucked safely in his arms. He wished he could wake up to her every day like this. And as often as he did get to spend the night with her, they were careful to keep things private so he didn’t often stay through the night or risk being caught leaving in the morning. He wasn’t always in The Capitol either. Some projects were better suited for the space and convenience of his district. Sometimes he needed the peace and quiet of nature away from the chaos.

This was all he ever needed though. Her in his arms at the very start of the day, resting peacefully still. Her breaths were soft and steady, very much in sync with the rise and fall of his own chest. With a small adoring smile, Luca shifted ever so slightly in order to place a gentle kiss upon the top of her head and just remain nestled there. Her scent serving to calm him as he breathed her in. 

He never wanted it to end. This should have been the rest of their lives: together. And not just in their final days. Going to sleep and waking up to one another. Sharing everything about their days over dinner. Going and leaving places together. Doing things to surprise each other. Not sneaking around, pretending. But it was the only way to keep it untainted and undisturbed. To keep it for themselves since Snow and The Capitol reached into every other aspect of their lives.

[lucaradovan]

Visit Original Link

Reddening West // All You Need

[lucaradovan]

Luca & River; The Capitol

[lucaradovan]

Luca & River; My Love,

[lucaradovan]

Fools For Sacrifice || River

[lucaradovan]

river-nereus:

There was an ache in her chest upon his question. Just as she couldn’t live without him, Luca had brought the reversed scenario to her. It was sefish of her to assume he would have been able to have a life for himself. They barely had lives as it was. And what good would it do for either of them to carry on without the other if it came down to that? But was this really how it would all end: the two of them dying in the Arena because live without each other was meaningless? How romantic, she could hear Caesar say.

Even so, River couldn’t settle for that as their fate. Not after all she and Luca had been through, what they had survived. Not when he was worth fighting for. A life with Luca, being able to grow old with him. Marry him, start a family– she couldn’t accept this as their end. Something had to be done. But what? It was just the two of them against The Capitol. There was no way they stood a chance, especially when Snow was their enemy. She wanted to watch Snow fall, too. Burn his kingdom down and leave it in ashes. But that would take time, and time wasn’t something they had.

Her eyes closed at his gentle soothing, their foreheads pressed together before she felt Luca’s lips against her own. She savored each kiss he gave her, each gentle touch from him. Anything to hang on to before The Games. Any small moment of happiness that helped her forget why they were even on that train in the first place. His arms around her and his comforting words helped calm the storm of anxious thoughts and all the fears building up in her, even if it was temporary.

And then he said those three words.

River’s eyes snapped open, bright blue eyes focused on him. The words didn’t come as a surprise; she knew he loved her. Never needed to be said, but she always wanted to tell him, wanted to say it to him every time she saw him. She wanted to hear them again, over and over, before their time in the Arena was up. But she didn’t want to think of that end. Didn’t want it to even be. There had to be a way out of all this, some sort of plan. Something to spare them from this fate. And River was determined to find out. For Luca’s sake.

“I love you, too,” she replied, fingers gently tracing along his cheek. “Always have, always will.” Her gaze softened and she leaned forward to press her lips to his in a tender, gentle kiss. “I thought we would, too.” Maybe she was deep in denial, but River couldn’t let herself keep thinking of their final moments. That this was their last train ride. That they would have one last kiss, one last chance to say ‘I love you’ and maybe one last chance to hold each other like this. It couldn’t be the last time. She didn’t want it to be.

“There has to be something we can do. Anything.” Anything to give us more time.

Romantic, tragic. Luca felt a similar ache in his chest, one where he had carved out a place for her, for them, for the many possibilities their future should have held. Instead it would lay hollow save for her and what time they’ve had together, and what brief time they had left still. It wasn’t much but he’d take all he could get. He now resided with a constant sense of urgency, of a heightened awareness of the seconds and minutes ticking by. It was an unnerving way to be, but he couldn’t help what he knew, what stood ahead of them.

The moment it was decided that they were both going into The Arena was the very moment his resolve began to crumble. What did it matter what people said or thought anymore if they were just going to die anyway? And while it wasn’t the ideal situation he had wanted to confess a love they both knew they already shared, he didn’t want it to be left unsaid still, or spoken first as part of the public parade they were being forced into participating in. Her more than himself given her moral fiber, but he couldn’t standby idle and just watch it happen.

Luca swallowed hard, forcing down the many saddening, sickening, and even hostile thoughts wreaking havoc within him. This couldn’t be the end of them. This couldn’t be all they share and leave behind. And how many more would come after them? How many more would be struck down and silenced at President Snow’s whim? There had to be something that could be done. The girl on fire had started something, perhaps it was their responsibility to take up the mantle along with her. Maybe that was their only shot.

A smile found its way across his face as she echoed his words, despite having already known it himself. It was still music to his ears, like her voice quietly lulling him to sleep in her arms late at night sometimes. He whimpered ever so slightly when River’s lips met his once again. His tongue traced his bottom lip subconsciously after, the faint taste of her lips still lingering on his own. “I’d never tire of hearing those words from you.” He sighed, nuzzling the tip of his nose along hers, a certain false-contentment to his delivery.

“If there is a way, any way, we’ll find it. We have to. This can’t be it for us. I won’t let it be,” he stated to reassure her - as much as himself - as if he had any control over the matter. Luca’s calm gave way to anger and forlorn sorrow in the face of this helpless. He didn’t know what to do. What could be done?

[lucaradovan]

Fools For Sacrifice || River

[lucaradovan]

river-nereus:

It was foolish to think they could have run away. That they would have had the chance to escape and live on their own. Away from the chaos of The Games, away from the tyranny of President Snow. Where would they have even gone to? Living off the land was dangerous enough; who knew what was out there beyond The Districts. But it wasn’t like they were any safer in Panem, either. There was no escaping their fate no matter how much they hoped it was a terrible nightmare or how much they wished time would just slow down. It was all going to end the same way.

She moved with his shifting position, letting her legs straddle his lap and arms rest on his shoulders. Keeping herself close to him and holding onto him as if letting go meant she would lose him completely. But his words had her shaking her head, one hand cupping the back of his head. Her fingers ran through his hair soothingly. “And be without you? I can’t live like that, Luca… not without you.”

He was the only person that got her through the struggles she faced. The guilt that still hung on her shoulders from her Games, from losing Marta and being so distanced from her family. And then having to sell herself to strangers most nights in The Capitol on top of it all, dealing with the Capitolites and the interviews, stupid propos– she had just wanted to be left alone after her Games. Luca was the only one she let in, the only person she let her walls down for.

This wasn’t fair. None of it was. But it was happening, it was happening to them and they didn’t give a damn about who died in the process. The Victors were just a distraction from the real problems in Panem. But now they were under the spotlight too much, fanning the flames of rebellion. Even if it was just Katniss Everdeen, to Snow, he felt the need to punish the many instead of just one girl. Drag them all down and get rid of the threat. Or drag them all in to hate this one girl.

Either way, it shouldn’t be happening, but it was. This was the cruel world they lived in. And River was going to do everything in her power not to make Luca a victim to it. She was not going to see his face up in the sky with the other dead Tributes.

“I won’t lose you, either. If you die in there, I…” she swallowed and shook her head, taking a moment to gather herself again. Just the thought of losing Luca in the Arena was too much for her. She knew she wouldn’t be able to live without him. It just wasn’t fathomable. Slowly, River drew in a deep breath, her gaze meeting his once more. The words were on the tip of her tongue, long overdue to be spoken. “I can’t even imagine what life would be like without you. You’re the greatest thing to happen to me, Luca, literally my other half.. there’s nothing for me in this world if you’re gone.”

He’d be a liar to deny the thought of running off into the woods with River hadn’t crossed his mind a time or two. Just whisk her away beyond the districts and build a cabin somewhere near a little stream or creek. Learn to live off the land. But that was a dangerous idea. Looking back, however, it couldn’t possibly be any more dangerous than the path they were on now. The Arena was literally a battlefield of survival. 

The feeling of her body pressed up against his, weighing him down, her hand in his hair, it all served to ground him. To aid him in holding himself together right now. Without her, Luca was sure he’d fall apart. He let out a laugh both bittersweet and ironic. “And what would I do, without you?” he asked, expression taking on a look of defeat. “You’re all I have too, River. And all I want...” He moved a hand to brush some hair from the side of her face, tucking it behind her ear affectionately. “I’d have been happy anywhere with you.”

Luca couldn’t quite help the melancholy that seemed to have settled in his bones. But it was hard to remain optimistic when you’ve convinced yourself that you’re heading to your death. He didn’t see any other options. He knew he wouldn’t be able to cope without her, and she had voiced the very same of him. So that was it then? That was how their story would end: they’d die together in the arena. It wasn’t the least bit fair. It wasn’t just.

It was scaremongering. Snow’s demonstration of power, of control and his desire to keep it. Sitting high above everyone on the pedestal he built for himself. Luca wanted to knock him down. He’d have far to fall. And Luca would enjoy nothing more than watching him meet a swift descent into nothing. For all the pain and suffering Snow deserved to experience himself, Panem would be far better off with him out of the picture altogether. Bring a close to this chapter of history with the death of its tyrant and move on to the next era.

He took her chin in his hand, running his thumb along her lower lip and hushing her as she responded to him and faltered. “Sh, darling,” he tangled his fingers in the hair at the back of her head, holding his forehead to River’s a moment longer until he pressed his lips to hers again, this time more firmly. He kissed her first to comfort her but then also to convey the heavy wave of emotion crashing down on him. He broke from her lips after some time, blue gaze both thoughtful and telling - as if waiting to reveal something, assessing the situation but he'd already decided to speak up. Time was precious for them now and he didn't intend to waste what little they had left. “I love you,” he said simply, like stating fact. “I have loved you.” The words tumbled from his mouth softly, not hurried or tentative. No, they came with the sort of ease and certainty that he was rather likened for. “I thought we’d have so much time...”

[lucaradovan]

Fools For Sacrifice || River

[lucaradovan]

river-nereus:

The Capitol citizens were blissfully ignorant to the suffering in The Districts. And for good reason; it was common knowledge life in the Districts wasn’t much compared to The Capitol. Citizens of The Capitol had it good. But then there were two kids picked from each District every year, fighting for their lives for the chance at a better life as a Victor. And The Capitol adored them. Held them upon a pedestal, not even realizing the horrors they endured. Because it was all a game to them. A fun show to watch every single year.

How did they know it was all one big power play? That actual families were torn apart because of these Games. Children were being killed in the most brutal fashions in the name of entertainment and some horrifying spectical of crowd control. People’s lives were in the balance. And once again, hers and Luca’s lives were at stake for these causes. Clearly important enough to break promises and tarnish any future any of them had. The future she wanted with him was falling apart, crumbling between her fingers like the sand on the beach back home.

Still, River allowed a small smile at his words about her songs. Even Luca didn’t realize how deep her devotion ran. It was obvious she cared for him deeply, but when it came to any sort of confession? Her actions spoke louder than any words could. Yet there was something about actually telling Luca, making sure he knew what she meant to him. And maybe those songs she wrote were her own ways to tell him until she could find the right words. But now they were running out of time.

Running out of time to hold each other like they were, to have these quiet moments they would steal from the public eye. Those intimate nights with his touch on her skin, erasing the many nights she had to sell her body for Snow because she was one of the District Four favorites. Because he was the only one that should have those passionate, private moments with her, not some stranger she was forced to bed. Each kiss, embrace, even the simple conversations she and Luca would have were on the clock. Andt the future she had hoped for them was limited to their final moments in The Arena.

Her head lifted, brow slightly raised, upon hearing her name. As soon as her gaze met his, any worry about time going too quickly ebbed away. The world passing them by outside of the train even seemed to slow. In that moment, all there was had been her and Luca. She leaned up to meet his lips halfway in the kiss. Seeking and hoping to give the same comfort they both were seeking so desperately. The only way she found the comfort was in Luca. No one else was able to bring her back from her rampant train of thought, to make her stop and just calm down. And even though she was looking for an escape from the present, being in Luca’s arms made her feel much safer than she knew she really was. He always made her feel safe.

She brought her free hand up to cup his cheek, keeping her lips to his for a moment longer. Her forehead rested against his, the tip of her nose bumping his own gently. “I’m not letting them take you from me,” she murmured, thumb stroking his cheek tenderly. Speaking as if she had any say in the matter. “You’re all that I’ve got. You’re everything. I can’t lose you, too.”

Why now? But Luca knew the answer to that as well as the others who were keen enough to see the subtle unrest. Katniss Everdeen had stoked the embers and they’d begun to ignite. This was Snow’s way of trying to extinguish the flames before a wildfire caught. Before the people realized the true power they held. The Victory tour before The Quell only added fuel, sparking further unrest in some of the districts. Snow had to eradicate it.

He only wished it didn’t include them. But Luca was no fool. They all posed a potential threat now having survived their games, having Katniss as a beacon of hope that they each represented and had the ability to wield as well. And anyone who threatened Snow in any way was always handled - often with finality of some sort - and used to his favor.

This was no different. Luca knew as well as River, and many of the others. It wasn’t fair.

Time was suddenly moving so quickly, as if sped up. However the moment her gaze met his, everything suddenly came to a near-halt. And it seemed to remain that way throughout the duration of their kiss. Ceasing the torturous thoughts clearly tormenting the both of them, the same thoughts most likely. It was a moment he wished could last longer, forever even. But each moment for them was fleeting now. They’d have to make the most of the ones they’d manage to get. They’d have to make their moments together since all the odds were stacked against them.

When her hand moved to his cheek, he reflexively slid his back further to tangle within her hair, his other arm supporting her back in its current position. And then they were breathing the same warm air, foreheads resting tenderly upon one another and their noses touching just so. Tears welled in his eyes at her remarks, though he squeezed them shut to keep from letting any fall. After a moment he shifted her so she was straddling his lap, holding her more closely to him with his arms wrapped around her slender frame. Clinging to her. “Me? What about you? You have to live, River. You have to,” he practically pleaded, face buried in the crook of her neck.

“They can’t do this to us,” he whispered, as if it hadn’t already been decided. Like they weren’t already on that ride whose last stop would be The Arena for all but one of them. He pulled back, upset and loving and angry, holding tight to all the things that were so he wouldn’t come undone. But there were still all the things that would never come to be peeling back layer upon layer of himself. “I won’t lose you...”

[lucaradovan]

river-nereus: 

 River & Luca

[lucaradovan]

Fools For Sacrifice || River

[lucaradovan]

river-nereus:

Their lives were never theirs. That was made clear with The Games, and even with the lives of all the Tributes lost over the years. Cameras were hidden everywhere, taking account of every day life in The Districts. Even speaking in your own home wasn’t guaranteed to be safe. Nothing was personal, nothing was specifically yours. It all belonged to The Capitol. Snow seemed to know it all, and made it abundantly clear if and when anyone stepped out of line.

That was why this relationship with Luca was so important to River. Something to keep to themselves. But if this was their last train ride, their last conversation or even the last time she would feel his arms around her… It made her sick just thinking about it.

It was why she leaned back against him, let him hold her and didn’t care if anyone passed through the car and caught them. Let them talk. Let them see. The time they thought they had was no more, and River wanted to take advantage of what time they did have, even if it was just this train ride. Part of her still wanted this to be theirs, something special only they shared. This didn’t need to be under a spotlight for people to gossip over and judge. Or to pick apart and analyze. But she would be damned if she didn’t show Luca how much he meant to her before all of this was over. Whether he was the last one alive, or if they both died. Because if he was gone before she was, River knew for a fact she wouldn’t be able to live without him. He was all she had.

She closed her eyes at the kiss to the side of her head, her thumb stroking slow circles over the back of his hand while he tried to find something to talk about. Anything. The last time they spoke, he mentioned having a few projects from The Capitol he was working on, including the rocking horse. River smiled sadly, her gaze still out the window. As dreadful as the thought of bringing a child into this sort of world was, thinking of Luca making a rocking horse for their child was a nice thought. A thought that would never come to pass at that point.

“I’m sure it’s really nice,” she settled with as a response.

Something good? What could she tell him at a time like this? But wasn’t that the point– say something good to escape from the truth of this moment, even for a while. Their last train ride, even if it would be a few hours before they would actually be Capitol bound. There were still a few other Districts to gather their Tributes from, after all. Escaping The Quell was impossible when it was so fresh on their minds. Still, River tried to think of something, anything.

Her gaze tore away from the window, nestling her cheek against Luca’s chest. “I finished that song I was working on,” she replied, her fingers lacing with his. “Took a while, but I finally finished it.” She wasn’t sure if that would matter much at that point, all things considering. But singing was one of her favorite things to do when she was alone, when the silence was intolerable. She sang under her breath, or out loud if no one else but Luca was around. And The Capitol adored her voice since she shared her talent, but Luca was usually the first to hear any of the songs she wrote.

They were all puppets, merely marionettes attached to strings being deliberately plucked and orchestrated to President Snow’s instruction. Everyone else fell victim to the smoke and mirrors, the theatrics. The carefully worded speeches and interview broadcasts - the distractions from the real problems - year after year. Selling fear and oppression as peace and protection. It wasn’t much of a life to live for most. Especially while others lived in blissful ignorance of the true tyrannical rule and widespread mistreatment of the better population of Panem.

How could they know though? How could those who didn’t have to fight for their lives or offer up loved ones to fight for theirs lives as mere adolescents really know the horrors? To them it was all a good show, a sport to root for and talk about. Place bets on. It was disgusting. These were people’s lives. These were futures at stake. His, and hers. 

He wanted so much more with her.

His thumb ran along her hand idly as she did his, something meant to soothe himself as much as her. Luca was a deeply emotional individual, despite what he didn’t let most see. He only showed so much, enough to be likable and relatable. But there were things he didn’t reveal to his adoring public. River knew better though. She saw more than anyone. And while she still hadn’t seen him at his utmost vulnerable, she had managed to expose, to reach in and claim various parts of him left otherwise untouched.

“Mm,” he hummed in agreement. Luca would not admit that he’d shared the same thought of making a horse for a future child of theirs. He’d have also made a rocking chair, the crib, dresser, and a toy chest too. He had never mentioned having thoughts of wanting a child with her - not only because of the world they lived in, but he’d yet to even admit that he loved her. He wasn’t quite sure what to take with him to his grave though.

When she spoke River captured his full attention. He’d always loved to hear her sing. And he loved that she’d share her songs with him first, as if revealing precious pieces of herself and making it feel all the more intimate before she gave it to the world. “I bet it’s wonderful. All of your songs are.” Luca was only ever really comfortable singing for her, however, he did play piano openly. 

“River?” He had shifted his gaze downward toward her and untangled his hand from hers before pausing a moment. He then cupped her face once more, tilting her head back and chin up, leaning to place a kiss to her lips. He had so much pent up emotion he ached to convey somehow, love and anguish at the forefront.

[lucaradovan]

[lucaradovan]

Visit Original Link

By Luca Radovan

[lucaradovan]

Fools For Sacrifice || River

[lucaradovan]

river-nereus:

She thought they had more time. They already had been in The Arena, there was no reason for her to think they would ever go back in. That their lives would be threatened and the clock was ticking on their time together. There was more to the half truths and secrets they kept from the public eye and she felt like even then it was only the beginning. They didn’t have enough time, not the time that she hoped they would have. The Quell cut it short rather abruptly.

If Luca wasn’t there, when she knew she was going in The Arena, River went to the beach. Sat with her toes in the sand and stared out at the sea. The rolling waves crashing up to the shore and washing over the damp sand. She had gone to the beach the morning of The Reaping, knowing well enough that was the last time she would enjoy the view. But she would never be able to accept the last moment she would have with Luca. Never be prepared for this to end.

So maybe that was why she was fine with him placing his hand on her cheek, taking that risk of being caught. But what did it matter at that point? If they were both going to die, they may as well make those moments between them mean something. How few there would be before the Arena. River leaned into the touch, despite how brief it was. She gave a small shake of her head as a reply. There wasn’t much either of them could do about their current predicament so there was no reason to dwell on it. Whether they liked it or not, it was happening and they were going back in the Arena.

Like Luca, River didn’t want to dwell on it. She was tired of thinking about it, tired of the what ifs and their limited time. Luca’s question may have seemed foolish, a petty distraction from what was to come, but River still obliged him. “Yeah,” she replied, reaching out to take his hand. No one else had entered the dining car and if cameras were on them, then so be it. She lead him over to the seats by the window, letting him take a seat first before she sat down next to him.

As much as she wanted to avoid rumors or gossip, she didn’t want to miss out on any opportunities to be with Luca, especially before they would reach The Capitol. So she shifted to lean her back against his chest, her head leaning back against his shoulder. Bright blue eyes gazed out the window at the trees rushing by, heading off to the next District to pick up the next few Victors for the Quell.

River tried not to let her mind fall back on The Quell, but it was hard not to think about. So she tried to ground herself in the present, reaching for Luca’s hand once again to hold. He was her anchor, helping her from getting lost in the clashing thoughts running through her mind. And she hoped she could offer the same comfort he gave her.

“We can talk about anything,” she spoke up finally, “anything but this Quell. It’s all I’ve been thinking about and my mind won’t stop…” River closed her eyes a moment and shook her head, making an effort to stop herself before she went off again. Neither of them wanted to talk about it, and she wanted to forget about it, even for the short amount of time before they would have to head to The Capitol. She just couldn’t be left to the quiet.

Time was all they were supposed to have after they’d each already competed and made it out of their own Games. That had been the deal. They’d fought for their lives and managed to survive already. This was like being in some nightmare, only there was no waking from it. No way out. This was happening. This was their lives now. They’d soon lack the ability to even have a personal conversation between them.

Was this it? Was their time on this train all they really had left? He nearly shuddered at the notion.

Luca had been even more reluctant to remove his hand as she’d leaned into his touch. But he had still removed it as quickly as it had been placed. There were seven pairs of victors on that train as well as others. They wouldn’t have many more opportunities left to be alone together before the coming storm. Once they reached the Capitol they’d be under a constant microscope and kept busy, apart mostly since they were from separate districts and any interaction between them would be more public. And while it didn’t much matter who saw or knew what at this point, he still didn’t want to parade it for others to pick apart. What they had he wanted to still be theirs.

A warm smile softened his features as she indulged him, taking his hand in hers and leading him to sit beside a nearby window to watch the world rush by. As it did each year for them since they were first Reaped as tributes and won, becoming mentors thereafter. Once they were settled, with River leaning back against his chest and her head resting upon his shoulder, he wrapped his arms around her and allowed her hand to find his again.

He breathed deeply, a long inhale and steady exhale, calm and collected. He placed a gentle kiss to the side of her head and instinctively nuzzled his face into her hair, breathing in her scent to keep him grounded. His eyes slid shut, succumbing to the tender moment presently shared with her. This was all he wanted for the rest of his life. He never needed more.

After some moments she spoke up and his eyes fluttered open to all the trees going by. He blinked a few times before parting his lips to reply. “I-” he began and faltered a moment. “I finally finished that rocking horse I’d been working on.” It had taken ages to complete with all the intricacies he’d done by hand. The piece had been commissioned by a prominent Capitol couple expecting their first precious child - one who would never come to experience the horrors of the Games or even know the fear of that possibility. The possibility of fighting for your life.

His mind couldn’t keep from going back to the Quell either. It was just all too daunting. “Tell me something good,” he whispered, blue gaze fixed on the scene through the window. However he wasn’t really paying much attention to the world outside. He was far too busy wracking his brain for all the lasts they’d unknowingly shared. The last night they spent in the same bed curled up together. The last real kiss he’d given her. The last morning-after breakfast with her clad only in his shirt. 

[lucaradovan]

Fools For Sacrifice || River

[lucaradovan]

river-nereus:

She hadn’t expected to grow so attached to Luca. The Games had changed her so drastically, she didn’t want anything to do with The Capitol, President Snow, any of the Mentors or other Victors– none of it. But Luca was there. And they shared a lot of thoughts and views on plenty of things. Their friendship grew so quickly and, eventually developed into something more.

River was supposed to be desirable. The Capitol was supposed to adore her, put her up on some pedestal and admire her strength and beauty. And how rare of an opportunity would it have been for any of them to have her, even for just a couple hours or for one night? River was disgusted with the idea, even more so with herself when she had no choice but to comply. Having strangers slide their hands beneath her dresses, paying her after their night spent with her. She hated it.

And it was all because she won her Games. Became a favorite within The Capitol. But she wasn’t the only one. Even Finnick had been thrown into the prostitution ring. Possibly to Snow’s utmost delight; Finnick was an attractive man. And had a few people’s lives on the line to leave him unable to refuse this offer.

That was one reason why her affair with Luca was so private. Threats against another Victor weren’t likely, but River wouldn’t rule it out. And what was going on between them was something more than just a friends with benefits arrangement. She wasn’t interested in anyone else, and she definitely despised her job in The Capitol. Those private nights with Luca were hers– theirs– to escape from the harsh reality of the world they lived in. Theirs, no one else’s. And River wanted to keep it that way. Luca felt the same.

His reaction to her comment was an almost too simple shrug. His calmer demeanor helped balance out her anxious thoughts– unfortunately not as well in this case, but enough. Still he was bitter, and she caught on to it even if it was subtle in his tone. She wanted to close the gap between them, just wrap her arms around him and keep him close to her side. Rest her head on his chest and let his heartbeat and the sound of his voice sooth her. But even the train wasn’t as private as they, or anyone, assumed. There were always eyes watching when it came to The Capitol.

“No one ever wins The Games,” she agreed in a low murmur. “There’s only survivors. But even after all this, that’s only going to be true for one of us.” She swallowed a lump that gathered in her throat, her gaze lowering briefly as she made an effort not to let her worries get the better of her. It was only a glimpse into what was running through her mind, but she knew it was enough to let Luca know what bothered her. they had known each other long enough to pick up on those cues.

“We shouldn’t even be here. None of us should be here.”

This was not how things were supposed to be. None of them should have been on that train. But then, no one should be sent to slaughter - especially as competition, as entertainment. As a demonstration of power and control. Most of them lived in oppression, afraid of potential harm or death should they step out of line. The rest lived in blissful ignorance to the real plights. To the utter tyranny. It was not the way the world should have been. Of that he was sure.

It only took having to make this walk toward what was likely to be his execution to realize how much he was really losing. How much more he really wanted of life. Of a life with her. And now it felt as though the clock was ticking down their lives. Just like that he was running out of time and they were really still only beginning.

When he’d met her, he never expected to grow to care for her in any real sense. Careers had had a reputation that generally didn’t appeal to him. But River had been different. And he’d have been damned to not have some grasp of understanding considering he’d managed to survive the Arena himself. Their friendship-turned-courtship took on a life of its own beyond their control. Beyond their carefully orchestrated stories and the half-truths they told and secrets they kept close to their chests. He never rested better than beside her. 

His calm appearance was a front he was struggling to maintain. He’d shoved his hands in his pockets to keep anyone from noticing that they were shaking. A combination of nerves, little sleep, a strong urge for a drink and to hit something, and a pit of regret settling in his bones. 

He merely nodded along with her remarks, his blue gaze fixed on her intently enough to indicate that he was no longer particularly focused on or interested in continuing to discuss the current subject at the moment.

What did it really matter now who saw or knew? Only one was going to come out alive. It was then that he removed a hand from his pocket and raised it to cup her cheek tenderly a moment before withdrawing his hand, overstepping bounds. “I’m sorry,” he murmured, apologizing more for the predicament rather than the action itself. Still he dropped his chin somewhat, shifting his gaze as well. Luca couldn’t help himself though. How many more chances might he get? And their close friendship was known regardless.

It was a simple enough gesture, but one he hoped conveyed his desire to comfort her somehow. “Care to watch the scenery with me?” And he was right back to his casual self, small smile and all as if this might not be their last train ride together. Like they’d do this again at the next Games, and the ones to follow.