Love is Not Like The Movies: There’s no such thing as true love, you don’t have a soul mate out there waiting for you and there’s no happily ever after. Every single romantic film and book and fairy tale and song and TV show is lying to you, building up a collective image that is a poor reflection of reality. It’s the relationship equivalent of a Barbie doll, unrealistic and vapid. Instead of all that shit what you have is a lot of people whose personality is more or less compatible with yours. At some point in your life you’re going to find yourself in lust with one of those people. You’re going to want to spend all of your waking hours with them, you’re going to miss them so much when they’re not with you that it’s going to hurt. And you’re going to want to do the kinds of things to them and with them that you cannot under any circumstances tell grandma about. Now pay attention kids, because here’s what love is.
It’s not burning passion and flaming hearts and sappy Hallmark moments. Love doesn’t proclaim itself from the rooftops. Love is what comes after all of that. It’s quieter than that, and more modest. Love is hard work. It’s toiling, every day without end, because this person is worth the effort. Being in love doesn’t mean not seeing your partner’s flaws; it means knowing every single one of them, and deciding that you’re going to put up with them for the sake of him or her. You don’t fall in love; you dive in, and you swim for all you’re worth. Sometimes you fall out of love. Sometimes you can’t give it the effort it deserves. Or sometimes it just becomes no longer worth it. That’s okay. Most of us are going to be on one end or the other of this at some point in our lives. But there’s good news, though. Because you chose to fall in love. And that means, once you get over the heartbreak, you can choose to do it again. I think there are a lot of people who will disagree with my definition of love. Everyone wants the fairy tale. But the fairy tale is bullshit. I like my way better.
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