Playful spooky starters, I guess.
‘It’s called ‘carving a pumpkin’, NAME, not ‘brutal pumpkin murder’. Show some decorum and seasonal goodwill.’
‘Yes, well, the only thing frightening at the present is how you’re holding that carving knife.’
‘If it’s any consolation, I promise not to ghost you when the season’s over.’
‘Halloween is for five-year-olds, and overgrown ones too.’
‘Can too much candy corn actually rot your teeth or was my dentist just trying to drum up October business?’
‘How about I treat you to a dinner?~’
‘Why does every costume have to be sexy? I don’t want to be sexy, I want to be the reason why the night is feared, muhahahahaha!’
‘Don’t be afraid of him; he’s still a Chihuahua, even if he’s wearing a lion costume for the occasion. He just has loftier aspirations at this time of year, that’s all.’
‘Your neck looks delicious, my dear. I mean…uh…you look delicious.’
‘My dad still insists on trick or treating with me every year in coordinated outfits, and I’m a fully grown adult.’
‘You dressed up as Santa Claus last Halloween and told everyone that you were the Ghost of Christmas Present. That is why you’re not invited this year.’
‘Theoretically, do you think brewing up a pot of special edition neon-green slime is honouring the season adequately, or would that breach workplace regulations if I tipped it over the boss?’
‘Are you crazy?! I’m not answering that door! That’s exactly what happens at the start of all of those movies, right before the killer gets in and –’
‘It’s just a kid dressed up as a watermelon, NAME. Chillax, will you?’
‘The entire office are a bunch of vampires? Well, I know they like to gossip and suck the life out of you, but I think that’s going a bit far…’
‘I don’t see a difference, actually. You’re a clown for the majority of the year.’
‘Is it acceptable to buy a jumbo bag of trick-or-treat candy and eat the lot myself while cuddled up under a blanket watching Twilight? Asking for a friend.’
‘Woah, scary. Oh, you’re not wearing a costume yet? My bad.’
‘Has…has NAME really come dressed as the Titanic? I have a sinking feeling about this party.’
‘What would actually happen if you did say ‘boo’ to a ghost? I’ve often wondered.’
‘The scariest thing about this party is the dirt cheap alcohol, just saying.’
‘It’s fine, it’s just a spooky clock chiming at the incorrect time while all of the lights are off and there’s strange footsteps creeping up the stairs.’
‘Someone egged the house again, dear. The neighbour’s house, that is. Ours apparently deserved rotten tomatoes, instead.’
‘I can’t come in to work today. I’m a certified emergency ghost buster.’
‘Well, I also can’t come in to work today. I’ve been bitten by a vampire.’
‘Oh, very funny NAME. The white sheet ‘ghost’ trick only works the first time you do it, you know. NAME, that’s enough! Uh – NAME…?’
‘Holy macaroni!!! There really is a ghost!’
‘Some people take the whole event a little too far.’
‘NAME decided to dress up as Batman and follow all of the clowns around the neighbourhood, pretending they’re the Joker. That’s one way of handling that, I suppose.’
‘Ah, here we go: the yearly observance of Fireworks Week, right on cue.’
‘It’s ALIVE! …I mean, good morning, dear. Did you sleep well?’
‘Now the real horror begins: the hangover. Ugh.’
‘Here’s to surviving Halloween for another year!’