AN: This probably isnât that great, itâs more me venting about my life. @long-time-no-sp00ning/@sexistence-crisis, donât read this.
Warnings: Sexual harassment, mentions of panic attacks.
Balthazar wasnât a quiet child. He was far too loud for Zachariahâs liking. Many times he questioned why his son wouldnât be tame and quiet like Urielâs son Castiel. They spent enough time together, Zachariah hoped Balthazar wouldâve picked up on the trait. But alas, Balthazar was a rambunctious child with a habit of oversharing and asking too many questions.
Looking back, Zachariah wondered what changed. Balthazar wasnât like that anymore. At some point, heâd just shut off, and he didnât talk to Zachariah anymore. Not near as much. Zachariah had been stunned to find out that Balthazar had gotten into a fight. He had to hear it from the principal. Not Balthazar himself. And more confusing, Balthazar had apparently gotten into a lot of trouble with the teacher for being snappy and harsh with one of his classmates in particular. Zachariah froze when he heard the name.
Nichole. He knew they were in the same class, but Balthazar never spoke about her bothering him. Balthazar wouldâve told him. It was how Balthazar was. Zachariah was miffed.
The drive home was quiet. Balthazar sat half sideways in the passenger seat, his eyes down. The radio was the only thing that drowned the silence. Zachariah looked over at his son.
âWhy didnât you say anything?â He asked softly.
âYou didnât ask.â Balthazar responded dryly. The junior drama star could trace it back to one moment though. The moment heâd shut up.
Ninth grade had been a long year for Balthazar. Well, Balthazar and Castiel. Nichole was a new student to their small town school. And of course, being as kind hearted as they were - well, as Cas was, but Balthazar rarely objected to his friendâs kind gestures - they invited the new student to spend time with them.
What hurt was theyâd become friends. Balthazar had even had her over to his house for a party. And having spent most of his earlier years in Britain, he had a different standard of what âcuddlinessâ as Gabriel called it was acceptable.
Looking back, Balthazar despised himself for being so blind. Especially for being how blind to how much Castiel was affected.
Balthazar and Castiel had always been close. Hold hands in the hallways, close. More comfortable with their arms around each other close. Occasional playful ass grab close.
He supposed Nichole took that as an invitation.
It didnât start off big. Maybe thatâs why it took him so long to notice how bad it was. It was like that story; put a frog in boiling water itâll jump out, but slowly increase the heat, the frog wonât notice, and boil to death.
That didnât make Balthazar feel better though.
Maybe Nichole was threatened by Balthazar. Even just a little bit afraid of him. Because he was the stronger one. He was the one who stood up for them both.
Not that that stopped her though.
It was initially just a constant need to be touching them. Holding hands. Hugging. Even just standing close enough their shoulders brushed.
Which wasnât that bad. It weirded them out a bit, but not enough for them to notice something was amiss. When they asked for space sheâd back off.
For a little bit anyways.
Slowly, inappropriate comments got thrown into the mix. Little things here and there. It made Castiel and Balthazar feel gross, but Nichole was just joking, right...?
She stopped listening to them. When they asked for space sheâd say okay, but never move away. When Balthazar told her to back the fuck off, sheâd played nice for that recess. That recess only.
The comments got worse. The ones that stuck with Balthazar the most were the times sheâd said âno means yesâ. Jokingly, right...?
There was one time he couldnât be at school because he was throwing up the entire contents of his stomach. Heâs heard later that day via text that Nichole had asked to sit on Castielâs lap, and when he asked why, sheâd said âbecause she wanted to feel his dick against her assâ. Reading the words made Balthazar want to throw up more, but heâd already dispensed off all the contents in his stomach.
Castiel stuck closer to Balthazar these days. Balthazar would protect him. They both dreaded the classes they were split up.
And Castiel didnât tell Balthazar until a long time after that Nichole kept trying to sneak a hand up his thigh all class.
Balthazar hates himself because he didnât say something when it happened to him. Sheâd hugged him, and as she drew away sheâd groped his cock.
He was too stunned to say anything, or do anything. There isnât a moment he doesnât regret slapping her in the face right then and there. Or saying something. Or doing anything. He just froze.
When they talked to Gabriel he coaxed them into talking to the principal. They didnât want to because they were afraid of what the teachers would say. And more afraid that it wouldnât help.
They did what they could but it wasnât enough.
Not to Castiel and Balthazar.
The teacher said she was sorry, and that she truly looked like she didnât know it was wrong.
Mustâve been a hell of an act, because they heard from their friend
They were going to press charges against her. Teach her that it wasnât okay. Give her something sheâd never forget.
But the officer told them that they couldnât, because when heâd spoken with her, he figured out that sheâs mentally deficient, so the case would just fall through.
Balthazar hadnât wanted to press charges at first, but he was absolutely crushed when he found out that the couldnât. It felt like Nichole was getting away with it. And it hurt. He remembered holding Castiel in his arms as the younger boy sobbed.
Balthazar didnât cry. Because he was supposed to be the strong one. He needed to be there for Castiel.
For the remainder of the year, Balthazar and Castiel were very shaken. They couldnât walk through the halls on their own. Gabriel was their superhero in that department. And Castiel transferred into either Gabriel or Balthazarâs option classes. Balthazar had panic attacks for awhile after, and couldnât be hugged without freaking out unless it was Gabriel or Castiel.
They got better. Pulled through. But it was never forgotten. Next year was high school, though. They wouldnât even see her. So everything was okay.
But that wasnât what made Balthazar quit talking to his father. Zachariah had been very caring and helpful through the whole ordeal.
Balthazar took foods as an elective at the end of the day. He had quite the skill for baking.
By sheer misfortune, Nichole happened to have the same elective. Sheâd tried to reach out to Castiel and him once before - not to apologize, no, to ask if they were still mad.
Other than that they hadnât spoken. But Balthazar still felt a chill crawl his spine.
He hadnât realized it still affected him. Heâd thought he was fine now. He thought that until she tried to talk to him.
Heâd asked his tablemate something about the recipe, and Nichole decided that it was perfectly fine for her to respond. Balthazar raised a finger to hush her.
âWhat makes you think you can talk to me?â He demanded
âI donât know!â She responded frustratedly.
âYou can fuck off.â Balthazar snarled, making Nichole storm off. He gave an apologetic glance to Alphie, his tablemate, before the bell sounded.
And thank god it did, because he could feel his heart drumming in his chest. He focused on his breath that was coming in short gasps as he hasitly cleaned his area and gathered his things.
Balthazar slammed his things into his locker, slinging his backpack over his shoulder before he made a beeline for Castielâs locker, instantly wrapping his arms around the male. Confused, Castiel hugged him back, his grip tightening as he heard his friendâs shaky sobs in his ear.
Balthazar calmed himself down, keeping his arms around Castiel.
âIâm sorry...â he whimpered. âI didnât know it still affected me...â Castiel slowly pieced it together.
âShe just tried to talk to me, and I... I handled it, but I just...â
âShh, itâs okay.â Castiel soothed, kissing Balthazarâs hair.
âIâve... Iâve got auditions...â Balthazar choked out. âI need to go.â Castiel gave him a look.
âWant me to stay?â He asked softly. Balthazar shook his head, wiping his eyes.
âIâll be okay...â he assured. âUriel will be pissed if you donât go home... Iâm okay.â Castiel nodded sadly, kissing Balthazarâs cheek.
âYouâre gonna do great at the auditions, I believe in you.â He nodded. Balthazar offered a smile, watching Castiel leave before slipping into the drama room and sitting beside his newest friend Ezekiel.
Balthazar cried, but Ezekiel hugged him through it, cheering him up as best as he could before auditions. Ezekiel was truly a life saver.
When Zachariah picked him up, naturally Balthazar began babbling the story. As he recounted the dialogue, Zachariah stopped him.
âYou donât need to swear to be cool, Balthazar.â He reminded. âDo you think it made you look good in front of Alphie?â Balthazar stopped. That was the takeaway.
âBut Dad, I-â He tried to interject but Zachariah didnât hear.
âIf youâre mad, I get it, but seriously, youâre at a school. Try to act mature.â Zachariah continued. Balthazarâs mouth felt dry. Thatâs what it was? Thatâs what Zachariah was concerned about. He sunk lower in his seat, tears flooding his eyes.
And that was when he stopped talking.
Balthazar didnât cry often, but that night, he sobbed until no more tears would fall.
Tag list: @petrichoravellichor
