My whole life has been an exploration of the dark corners inside me as I tried to sort out and outsmart the anger and depression. I dissect myself psychologically like a surgeon looking for answers. There are pros and cons to looking at yourself that objectively.
One side of me is jaded. One side of me was wanting to stand still just to prove a point. I got very close to making my life's entire goal to be to prove a point. Lessons from that? You can't convince someone to look at something if they've convinced themselves doesn't exist.
The other side of me is a child inside, still dreaming and open and easily hurt. When you get hurt, you close yourself off and build walls to protect. Those same walls keep you from a lot of good that could otherwise come your way. Remaining open allows you to be hurt but also allows you to experience good.
Behind all the mental checks and rules, I start to have that openness. Ironic.
This is about the balance between these two worlds. We cannot pretend there aren't storms in life. We can't live life expecting all bright colors. But it's the dark colors that add depth to a painting, just as they add depth to our being.
This is about the lights AND darks in life. You can't pick one and leave the other.
I hope your dreams outweigh your dark.
Keep on fighting and keep pushing. It's never easy and never a quick battle but it's always worth it 🖤
