familiar and unharmed

tristen. twenty. libra. mild. sensitive. treading lightly.

[purplebuddhaquotes]

“I want something else. I’m not even sure what to call it anymore except I know it feels roomy and it’s drenched in sunlight and it’s weightless and I know it’s not cheap. Probably not even real.”

— Mark Z. Danielweski

[vanillagloss]

[nerdjpg]

She’s arrived

[mirrorfalls]

Fundamentalist fearmongering video: This dungeon “master” is given complete control and “players” must do whatever dark things are demanded of them.

Real DM: Please, just cross the river. You’ve all tried to seduce the catfish and it didn’t work. I’m begging you.

[hotboyproblems]

doctor: sir, i'm sorry. the results are in and i'm afraid you have updog

patient: wh- what's updog

doctor, calling a nurse on the hospital's intercom: KAREN GET IN HERE I TOLD YOU I COULD DO IT

[wexler]

that one time on Hotel Hell when Gordon Ramsay fed the owner’s dog some shitty bread and then was afraid he killed her

[unclefather]

He checked her pulse

[ellysmallwood-deactivated201909]

[greenmossloveisreal1998iloveyou]

deactivating my bones tonight for a little blob action

[mmmgrayons]

[betype]

[comma22-deactivated20230610]

[thatgirlwiththememes]

Gn

[kinktendo-shamecube-is-dead]

tumblr mobile: yo. ur connection? *slaps my flaccid router* its fuckin chungo dude

[beautifullyxdamaged]

why is this so true

[kinktendo-shamecube-is-dead]

why would i lie to you?

[mjalti]

me, at 3 am: babe wake up … I figured out the jonbenet Ramsey murder case

my husband, groggy, the fourth time this week I’ve woken him up at 3 am with that statement exactly: ok let’s go over the facts,

[starredforest]

customer: says some rude shit to me me: says literally anything back them:

[jalebis-n-jimmychoos]

life gets so much better when you realize you can literally do whatever the fuck you want if you dont care what anyone thinks about you

[astrolocherry]

ask your doctor if the moon is causing all this