You think you can hurt me?
September 6, 2023 - the very day I lost my 2nd baby at 5 weeks.
September 8, 2023 - my 33rd birthday

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@mariawendita
You think you can hurt me?
September 6, 2023 - the very day I lost my 2nd baby at 5 weeks.
September 8, 2023 - my 33rd birthday
The very reason I am happy and contented right now. All my stress and emotional struggles are gone once I see how they grow as happy babies. I really miss them everyday. How I wish I could just stay with them forever.
Motherhood š
Being a mother isnāt just about bearing a child for nine (9) months and giving birth thereafter. Motherhood doesnāt stop there. Itās all about the changes from your body up to your mental capacity. Apart from those, you will experience these:
Hair fall and oily skin
Unpleasant odor due to breastmilk
Sleepless nights
Unexplainable fatigue
Self-pity when you canāt provide milk for your baby
Guilt when baby gets sick
Emotional stress everyday
Countless check ups to the pedia
Vaccination schedules and fees
Provision of baby essentials i.e. milk, diaper, vitamins
Hospital bills when baby gets sick
Lack of time for self-care
Household chores that were added up due to the baby arrival. i.e. laundry, daily baby bath time, washing of feeding bottles, milk preparation.
Hushing baby to go to sleep
Most of the time, I forget that I need to eat something to retain my strength while taking care of my baby. I am always exhausted.
My Daughter's Fight Against Severe Pneumonia: A Story of Resilience
This is the story of my two-month-old daughter's harrowing battle with severe pneumonia. It was a terrifying ordeal, but thanks to the dedicated medical professionals and her own incredible strength, she is now thriving.
The Onset:
December 5, 2024: My daughter developed a mild cold with a runny nose. I wanted to take her to her pediatrician at the Philippine General Hospital (PGH) immediately, but her appointment wasn't until Monday.
December 9, 2024: During her scheduled check-up at PGH, her lungs were clear, and she was prescribed Disudrin for her cold.
December 10, 2024: A day later, she developed a cough, initially mild.
December 11, 2024: By 8:00 AM, her condition worsened, prompting me to rush her to Bicutan Medical Center. An X-ray was performed, and she was prescribed Cefuroxime.
December 12, 2024: The X-ray revealed bilateral pneumonia. Seeking a second opinion, we consulted a doctor at ParaƱaque Doctorās Hospital. To our relief, she dismissed the diagnosis, stating the lung sounds were inconsistent and that Cefuroxime was inappropriate for her age.
The Worsening Crisis:
December 13, 2024: I briefly left her in the care of a family friend while attending a function. By 8:26 PM, she became lethargic and unusually fussy.
December 14, 2024: At 1:00 AM, deeply concerned, I contacted her pediatrician at Bicutan Medical Center, sending a video of her breathing. She advised immediate admission. We rushed to BMC, but due to financial constraints, we had to return home. At 7:30 AM, we tried Taguig-Pateros District Hospitalās ER, but they were at full capacity and referred us to Rizal Medical Center (RMC). RMC also couldn't admit her, stating her breathing appeared normal.
December 15, 2024: Her breathing worsened again. At 8:00 AM, we took her to Taguig Doctorās Hospital, where she received nebulization and a recommendation to seek care at a larger hospital. We immediately went to PGH. She was given oxygen and, due to overcrowding in the ER, shared a bed with another child with pneumonia. This was also the day my other daughter arrived from the province for the holidays.
December 17, 2024: We were discharged from PGH with home medications, her vital signs stable.
December 18, 2024: On her original due date (she was born prematurely on November 4th), we continued her home nebulization and antibiotics. She ate a little but became lethargic again, with wheezing. By 8:30 PM, her condition deteriorated rapidly: mouth breathing, severe difficulty breathing, and pale skin. We rushed her back to the hospital.
The Critical Stage and Recovery:
At the hospital, she required resuscitation in the ER. She had stopped breathing and turned blue. She was diagnosed with severe pneumonia. The initial antibiotics were ineffective and had to be changed. The following days were critical as we watched her fight for her life. Finally, she began to improve, feeding normally and breathing more easily.
The Aftermath:
Today, my daughter is healthy and thriving, a testament to her incredible resilience. I share this story to emphasize the seriousness of pneumonia, especially in infants. Seek immediate medical attention for any concerning symptoms. This experience also highlights the importance of protecting newborns from illness. If you are sick, please avoid contact with infants, as they are extremely vulnerable to infections.
Life humbles you. As you grow old, you stop chasing the big things and start valuing the little things. Alone time, enough sleep, a good diet, long walks, and quality time with loved ones. Simplicity becomes the ultimate goal. āØ
Ctto.
I am stucked š¤
Today is July 28th 2024 and itās been 5 years since I entered graduate school. Last night, I dreamt about my precious baby, whom I bear and took care of for a long time just suddenly dropped on the floor. I was so worried if he/she was ok because I wasnāt able to catch him/her fall. The baby did not even cry. I really am regretful cause I wasnāt able to protect it until the end.
By the time, I woke up, I was literally worried about my baby. I told my husband about it and he said I should not dwell on it and nothing bad will happen to our baby. I felt relieved. I am on my 5th month actually.
However, I searched about it on Google and somebody posted that the baby only symbolizes something - it could be ideas or a project I need to bring into fruition. And I suddenly realized, it could be my graduate school thesis, which until now isnāt finished yet. I am so disappointed with myself. Adding to my wound is what I saw on my social media account - my friend who is graduating soon. This is so heartbreaking for me. I hope I could have enough time to finish my paper.
Virgo Problems āļø
7 March 2024 (Thursday)
Iām a Virgo: I donāt lose friends - they lose me or they really arenāt MY friends. I have trust issues, when you talk about people behind their backs, I simply listen. I am calculating and imagining (overthinker as always) how exactly you would do the same when I am not around. Yes, maybe itās already your nature and you are not aware of it. But I want you to read this over and over again - IF YOU HAVE ISSUES, TELL IT STRAIGHT TO MY FACE RATHER THAN RECRUITING PEOPLE TO HATE ME! Yes, You! 𫵠#AngToxicMo
My little one becomes a big good girl already and itās just too fast!
Photos taken before their Elementary day 2023. In our time, we have our costumes. Good thing that those arenāt required now, which is way more practical.
It is a tradition to hold this event every November 3rd of the year - a part of the celebration for the Al Cinco de Noviembre in Negros Occidental.
5 October 2023 (Thursday)
I was asked by my colleague twice today if how I was. I just nodded, smiled and said āSame same.ā I actually am not okay as I feel like I disappointed my Boss and my colleagues more than I disappoint myself.
I attended a meeting today and I am lost - again. I feel like I need to get out of the organization before I get too overwhelmed by everything. I wonāt justify myself because I know I am really lacking. I start thinking that I donāt really deserve the good things given to me. I am so down today. š
On top of that, I recently miscarried our little one on his 5th week. I was hoping I will have a baby boy and I already claimed it. Yes, I am hesitant at first as I still am trying to finish my thesis. I also wanted to travel a lot. But, when he left me I feel so devastated. I try not to tell everyone, only to those close to my heart.
Iāve always wanted to leave already, but I still canāt. I pray that one of my applications will proceed so that I can transfer and my current organization wonāt suffer.
24 September 2023
It is supposed to be my Papaās 57th birthday today, but I know heās being celebrated there in heaven. I am supposed to be happy knowing that he no longer suffers here on Earth, but the thought of him fighting for his life and wanting to live longer still haunts me. I wasnāt there when he needed me. He loved me more than anyone, but I never loved him back. He celebrated his remaining birthdays without even the littlest thought from me. I lived my life hating him and I deeply regretted it. I miss you Papa and sorry for all my shortcomings as your daughter. I know, I am always your favorite child. š
#birthday #wishes #PapaLovesMe
Surprise!! 1989 (Taylorās Version) is on its way to you š! The 1989 album changed my life in countless ways, and it fills me with such excitement to announce that my version of it will be out October 27th. To be perfectly honest, this is my most FAVORITE re-record Iāve ever done because the 5 From The Vault tracks are so insane. I canāt believe they were ever left behind. But not for long! Pre order 1989 (Taylorās Version) on my site š
http://taylor.lnk.to/1989TaylorsVersion
People have a lot to say - pretend youāre listening and donāt mind them anyway.
Youāve been through a lot of storms in life, whatever they say are just mere noises, therefore pointless.
If thereās somebody who was born in this world to make us happy, these very people are definitely not them. They are here to ruin the vibe, and we have to cut any sort of connection with them. Like, now.
Them: She doesnāt deserve her promotion.
Me: Toodles š
And it's finally official! Just got promoted.
A Review: Extraordinary Attorney Woo
The story of this drama is more than just about mental health. I appreciate how this show acknowledged the importance of each individual within a society regardless of ones status, gender, power, disability, mental capacity, etc.
Despite the fact that Attorney Woo does unusual and peculiar things - as what she has mentioned in one of the episodes - she gains recognition effortlessly. Plots were used against her, but she never backed down. She just continously did her job.
This is something career people could relate with too. Being excellent at work would gain you enemies. You would just enjoy what you are doing, thus excel on your craft. You would eventually be happy, but that's not the case for the people around you. You will be bullied. You will be ridiculed and be shouted at because you are just too good. Egoistic people would hate you and they would isolate you from the group. You will look like you're doing all good and okay, but you are just too good to handle it by yourself.
She is a genius, yes. She lacks social skills, but her heart is genuine.
šø ctto
You are expensive - no matter what.
You have the power to decide what's your worth, not anybody else. They will trample you down, but you have the sole power to stop them.
You will be used.
You will be hurt.
You will be laughed at.
But, you will learn from all those scars.
You will rise - eventually.
You will be stronger.
You will be you, again.
Our little one, Tammy just turned 7. Time flies so fast and we are more than excited to witness her own wins in life.
Our parenting was frowned upon by many since we are not with her. My mom takes care of Tammy since she was 3, and we're thankful she understands our situation. When asked about where her dad and mom is, she would respond, "At work".
Yes, work is important, but spending quality time especially on your daughter's birthday is something we always plan. As parents, we are looking forward to it aside from the yearly Christmas breaks.