mel takes the cake

I’m an avid reader, a stress baker, and a media junkie. I’ve been spending too much time on the internet since I was seven years old and I began learning HTML so I could dress up my shop on Neopets. I watch an excessive amount of television, own more than a reasonable number of cupcake liners, and enjoy figuring out the end of mystery novels before the main character. I work in Student Affairs at a university and it's a field that allows me to grow and challenge myself every day. I'm fortunate to have a strong community of family, incredible friends, and the most fantastic coworkers a person could ever ask for.

[veryfunnymemes]

[automatically]

if you want a nice body, go get it. if you want to become a lawyer, study your ass off. if you want nice hair, pick a style and get it done. stop being afraid and motivate yourself. find yourself. find your happiness, because it’s out there waiting for you.

[traplikebossy]

the negative replies to this piss me off. i’m convinced a lot of y’all love wallowing in misery.

[prettyindeath]

Today’s culture really has people thinking that either their life circumstances will eventually improve without them lifting a finger and they just have to tough it out in the meantime, or that even if they put in the work they’ll remain in the same miserable place for all eternity.

Take it from someone who clawed herself out of a hellhole: You can make things better yourself. Stop promoting perpetual depression.

[meltakesthecake]

@mwwwbqqqq I know I reblogged this from you but literally #MBWorkBitch2019 Let’s work on all aspects of our mental, physical and emotional health and fucking Get It.

[politicalsci]

also explains why conservatives and neoliberal centrists actually prefer higher tuition fees rather than making tertiary education free.

[brunhiddensmusings]

‘we only succeed when voters are dumb and gullible’ is a very telling admission

[isthisanewsie]

Girls don’t want guys Girls want full length Broadway musicals professionally recorded and put on Netflix

[bpdbot]

sometimes i have too many emotions and sometimes i have none at all but i always always feel like i’m drowning

[thesaurio]

Learn how to swim Bitch

[bpdbot]

i made this post when i was in A Mood and all the replies are so angst and depressing except this Whole Ass Mood. Learn how to swim Bitch it’s 2018 we’re dealing with our problems

[cheaphalloweencostume]

AT MY AUTOPSY:

mortician: *makes the first incision*

me: *confetti comes flying out of my chest cavity with a little trumpet noise*

[powerfulwizard]

None of the ugly men seeking relationships with women who think people should look past what they look like for their personality seek women for the same thing.

[powerfulwizard]

Sexy women with huge boobs should look past my gross face greasy hair receding hairline bad hygiene stupid haircut nasley voice unflattering facial hair laughable beliefs dirty clothes bad skin because I have a really good personality.

[mwwwbqqqq]

@meltakesthecake incels amirite

[meltakesthecake]

@mwwwbqqqq ugh yes. “Even the fat disgusting whale whores don’t want to have sex with me.” Ummm why don’t you read that sentence back and see if you can tell where you went wrong here you know?

[sweaterwithpaintstains]

3 am is such a powerful time. there are people sleeping. there are people partying. there are people having a movie marathon. there are people crying. there are people loving. there are people dying. there are people living. toegther at 3 am.

[susielesbian]

don’t romanticize 3 am everyone should be in bed!!!! go to sleep bitch!!!!!

[letstalkabouttrek]

the best part about stranger things is that they can’t solve anything until they put the three groups together because each group is acting within a separate genre

mike, lucas, dustin, and el are in a weird sci-fi coming of age story where the group of plucky misfit kids solve the mystery and test their friendship along the way

nancy and jonathan are in a horror movie where the teenagers have to kill the monster set against a backdrop of high school drama and romance

joyce and hopper are in a conspiracy thriller where the adults have to figure out what shady stuff the government is up to while also dealing with the difficulties of their personal lives

they all approach the issue within the confines of their genre, but none of those approaches work because none of them are seeing the whole picture. it’s only when all the threads start to converge that they can actually get anything done.

[faithtrustandfuturehearts]

This is brilliant and I love it

[north-bi-northwest]

The other interesting thing is how they switched around the roles for S2:

Nancy and Jonathan are now in the conspiracy thriller trying to bring the people from Hawkins Lab in S1 to justice

Mike, Lucas, Dustin, and Max are in the horror movie, trying to kill Dart and the demo-dogs (with the love triangle between Lucas/Dustin/Max in the background)

And then there’s Joyce and Hopper (with occasional intervention/assistance from El and Will) in the sci-fi story trying to work out how the upside-down works and how to fix it.

[alessandriana]

And Steve thinks he’s in a teen romance, but in reality he’s the guy showing up ten minutes late with Starbucks to the horror movie.

[connoraustin]

My hobbies include

-overeating -oversleeping -overreacting

[foulserpent]

“a no-sex bar sounds like a superb idea” do you think people just fuck in bars.  like you go into a bar theres just a fucking wild orgy happening on the tables and like one guy on the side drinking 

[pepperclemens]

Perhaps its meant in the asexual way, like, make friends or something?

[foulserpent]

go to a coffee shop??? join a club????? leave the house??????? 

[edgar-allen-pho-deactivated2018]

nah okay, fuck that you’ve clearly never experienced a night where you’re walking around a downtown core like “where is everybody????” and then get to a club and it is PACKED and you realize this is it. this is where everyone goes, this is where everybody is.

and you walk around and get a drink and realize All of the people are here to have sex. you can see it in their eyes. they are there to have sex, or there because their friends are having sex, or because they want to look like they’re someone who has sex. everyone is at the club, and everyone is there for sex, and if you’re not about that you have a lot of work to do if you’re going to be part of any social group.

then again people on this site are absolutely in love with interpreting everything with the express purpose of mocking it, so yeah get your bits in.

[niggagenos]

we need asexual grocery stores too last week i went to walmart and a lady was putting a king size snickers bar up her pussy

[meltakesthecake]

What I thought reading as an English major would be: Ah, let me relax under this tree in a warm sweater and read this classic piece of literature.

What reading as an English major actually is: I have two days to read this 500 page novel about a bunch of horrible people who I think are all cheating on each other but I'm not sure because this writing style is nearly incomprehensible.

[mwwwbqqqq]

god i really just wanna drink juice all the time

[meltakesthecake]

ME. WHY AREN’T PEOPLE ALWAYS TALKING ABOUT HOW DELICIOUS JUICE IS?

[adeles]

#a mood

[meltakesthecake]

@mwwwbqqqq

[tributary]

do i even really have imposter syndrome

[errorschacha]

Will sexual harassment discussions ever advance to the core issue of women’s status as consumable sex objects instead of centering on when and where it’s inappropriate to consume us? Tune in next century.

[laurierrose]

WHEN will 2017’s hottest trend (firing sexual predators) hit the white house???