Why did my dumbass repeatedly give it up to a person who obviously hated me and already let me go long ago before I even realized it.. Now I realize why some chapters must close for new ones to begin. For old habits to finally die. And a few have so far already. That's the start of the old me finally dying and letting a new version flourish. I will never regret the amount of love I had and wanted to give to someone. To hold onto something and someone for that long because I didn't want to lose them. It taught me so much about valuing myself and not letting anyone get that close ever again. I have never loved someone that much for that long before, but now I finally knew what it felt like. It's both a blessing and a curse to experience that feeling. The highs and the lows. The uncertainty. The intimacy. The vulnerability. While I'll miss the version that once existed in my head, I'm so proud of finally letting go when I thought I never could or would be able to. I admit, it'll still leave a lasting impression, but now, hopefully it won't sit on the back of my mind that much anymore now that I've got my final sign and answer. I'll cherish the old memories and moments. To have experienced something so different. Now is my sign to let it all go and let my true, authentic self flourish and grow onwards.