I’m getting closer and closer to where I was 7 years ago when I tried to kill myself and ended up in the hospital for weeks. I’m so fucking tired. I hate myself and everyone around me hates me. I thought that if I tried hard enough I could get better but all I do is fuck up everything.
I’m homeless, have no friends, no one to be there for me when I need a shoulder to cry on. The man I thought I loved was never for me and the man I wish I didn’t love tells me that I make him sick. I make myself sick. I make myself so sick it feels like I’m dying. I want to end this all. I really can’t handle much more I’m breaking into so many pieces. I wish someone could see how badly I’m hurting. I wish I hadn’t pushed away all the people that cared about me and would’ve hugged me and comforted me right now when I need it.
I was always meant to be alone, in the end. I’ll die alone and it’ll finally end the cycle.
