This man, this… thing… clothes himself in scripture and victim-blames abusive marriages and failed relationships on women for not being subservient.
I’m sorry, sir. My entire attitude fell into a combination of shaky fear and codependence in trying to be consistently the peacekeeper, the laundress (as he would not help), the breadwinner, the runner for fast food and cooker of meals he would rarely eat with us as a family. Did I listen? Yes. Arguably, too much.
I listened to him yell at me about overspending a dollar on a toothbrush by going to a store I always preferred to get my toothbrushes from.
I listened to him yell about how I wasn’t making enough money for my degree.
I listened to him yell at me about things out of my locus of control.
I listened to him yell at me for picking the wrong root beer.
I listened to things he said so that I could try to avoid making the same mistake twice. I had a 15/60/25 ratio average:
15% of the time, I managed to do whatever it was correctly and that was fine. This included, occasionally, visiting different stores, taking nothing for granted, and getting whatever at almost all costs.
60% of the time I could not figure out what he wanted in advance. This was a combination of fear, anxiety, frustration, sadness, and a hurried mental rifling of all things pertaining to similar situations. I am human, and forget things. My actions were wrong, and I would get yelled at.
25% of the time I would do nothing, and of those times, 50% resulted in a fight or getting yelled at.
I almost threw myself off a damn building, and he told me to do it before talking me down. Even then, the only reason I didn’t was because I was scared that I might survive the seven-story drop.
So yeah, this is full of it.
romaincrisis
areudirty
ellievsbear
dailybridgerton
