Deprevity’s void of lullaby - Chapter 1 - MsFantasy3 - Bendy and the Ink Machine [Archive of Our Own]
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Today's Document
noise dept.
cherry valley forever
YOU ARE THE REASON
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Kaledo Art
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if i look back, i am lost
Jules of Nature
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oozey mess
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shark vs the universe
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@msfantasy3
Deprevity’s void of lullaby - Chapter 1 - MsFantasy3 - Bendy and the Ink Machine [Archive of Our Own]
The Benicio family is back and better than ever!
Working on the last part of a fanfic triology (maybe more depending on how the three fanfics do). “depravity’s void of lullaby” is now in progress.
Say hello to the three main mafia families of Toon Town.
- The Benicio family
- The fiammante family
- The flying fish family
warning (these fanfics are an AU of an AU “AU-seption” )
Please help an amateur artist out
Abel belongs to twisted-wind
Some links to two fanfics i wrote with “the Benicio family”. Fanfiction.net : ink virus: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13640747/1/Ink-Virus starlight asylum: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13736120/1/Starlight-Asylum archiveofourown.org : ink virus: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25207306/chapters/61096099 starlight asylum: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27311677/chapters/66730006 I hope you all can enjoy the Benicio family as they take you on emotional rollercoasters of adventures
Abel belongs to: twisted-wind
Benicio belongs to: thelostmoongazer
“Just make it a good one.”
happy holidays everyone https://www.deviantart.com/msfantasy3
Halloweenfanfic in the works
Abel the rebel angel: by twisted-wind (on Deviantart)
Benicio (Bendy) mob boss: @thelostmoongazer thelostmoongazer (on Tumblr)
Elymas: @animal-guardian animal-guardian (on Tumblr)
My own OC's (Gizmo the crow, Fonzy the fox, Luna the wolf, Deeralyn the deer, Diana the fairy, and Jack the faun)
Alice and Boris: By the kindly beast
So, I don't know how to write pain like! What words do I use? how do I describe it! I really need some help here!
No problem! And sorry about not answering sooner, I was on vacation. To make it up to you, I’ve made one of my trademark Long Posts about it.
TIPS ON HOW TO WRITE PAIN (FOR BOTH ORIGINAL CONTENT WRITERS AND FANFICTION WRITERS)
When I first started writing, about eight years ago, I had the same issue as @imjustafuckinggirl.
How are you supposed to write about pain you’ve never experienced before???
The characters in my book suffer through all sorts of terrible shit, and in no way am I writing from experience, which is marginally easier to do than write about something that has never happened to you.
However, with time, I managed to gather up a few strategies on how to write pain.
1. Don’t Write Paragraphs About It
I know, it’s tempting. You want to convey to the reader just how much pain the character is in, and you think that the pain will be emphasized the more you write about it.
This, however, is a lie.
As a reader, when I’m reading a book or fanfiction where, whenever the writer uses agonizingly long paragraphs to describe when a character is hurt, I skip it.
Entirely.
It’s boring and, quite frankly, unnecessary, especially during a fight or huge battle, which are supposed to be fast-paced.
When it comes to writing about pain, it really is about quality and not quantity.
In my own writing, I stick to short, quick paragraphs, some of them which are barely a line long. This gives it a faster pace and sort of parallels with the scattered, spread out thoughts of the character as they suffer.
2. Describe it Right
Many times, usually in fanfiction, writers over-exaggerate certain injuries.
This partially has to do with the fact that they’ve never experienced that injury before and are just thinking about what it might feel like.
As a girl with two brothers and who often participated in rough play-fights, I can assure you that getting punched is not as painful as you think it is.
(However, it does depend on the area, as well as how hard the punch is, on top of the fact that you have to take into account whether or not the punch broke bones)
I’m reading a high school AU where a character gets punched by a bully (Idk where they got punched it wasn’t stated) and the author is describing it like they’d been shot.
It was to the point where I was like Did the bully have brass knuckles or something????
It was very clear that this author had never been punched before.
When describing the pain of an injury or the injury itself, you have to take into account:
- What object was used to harm the character
- Where the injury is
- How long the character has had the injury
- (For blades) How deep the cut is
- (For blunt force trauma) How hard the hit was
- Whether or not the wound triggers other things (Ex: Concussion, vomiting, dizziness, infection, internal/external bleeding).
There’s also the fact that when some authors described wounds caused by blades such as knives, daggers, and swords, they never take into account the anatomy of a person and which places cause the most blood flow.
Obviously, a cut on your cheek will have less of a blood flow than a cut on your wrist, depending on what the blade hits, and I hope that everyone consults a diagram of veins, capillaries, arteries, etc. when they’re describing blood flow from a certain place.
There’s also the fact that you have to take into account where the blood is coming from. Veins? Arteries?
The blood from arteries will be a brighter red, like vermilion, than the blood from veins, which is the dark crimson everyone likes to talk about.
Not all places gush bright red blood, people!
3. DIFFERENT INJURIES HAVE DIFFERENT KINDS OF PAIN
Here, let me explain.
A punch feels different from a slap.
A broken arm feels different from getting stabbed.
A fall feels different from a dog bite.
I’ll give you a list of all the kinds of things that can be described for the three most common kinds of injuries that happen in stories:
Punch/Blunt Force Trauma
How it feels:
- Aching
- Numbness (In the later stages)
- A single spike of pain before it fades into an ache
- Throbbing
Effects:
- Vomiting (If the character is punched in the gut)
- Swelling
- Bruising
- Broken bones
- Unconsciousness (Blow to the head)
- Dizziness (Blow to the head)
- Concussion (Also a blow to the head)
- Internal bleeding
- Death (In the case of concussions and internal bleeding and broken bones- ribs can pierce lungs)
Stab Wound/Cut
How it feels:
- Stinging (only shallow wounds have just stinging)
- Burning
- With stab wounds, I feel like describing the effects of it make it more powerfully felt by the reader
Effects:
- Bleeding (Consult chart of the circulatory system beforehand for the amount of blood flow that should be described and what color the blood should be)
- Dizziness (Heavy blood loss)
- Unconsciousness
- Infection (if left unattended)
- Death
Gunshot
How it feels:
- Depends on the caliber bullet, from how far away they were shot (point-blank range is nothing like being shot from a distance), and in what place. Do careful research and then make your decision.
Effects:
- Bleeding(Consult chart of the circulatory system beforehand for the amount of blood flow that should be described and what color the blood should be. Also take into effect the above variables for blood flow as well.)
- Dizziness (Heavy blood loss)
- Infection (if left unattended)
- Death
Some things that a character may do while they’re injured:
- Heavy/Harsh/Ragged breathing
- Panting
- Making noises of pain
gasping
grunting
hissing
groaning
whimpering
yelping (when the injury is inflicted)
screaming
shrieking
wailing
- Crying/ Weeping/Sobbing/Etc.
- Clenching their teeth
- Unable to speak
- Pressing their hands against a stab wound/cut to try and stem the bleeding
- Eyesight going out of whack (vision blurring and tilting, the room spinning, black spots consuming sight)
- Eyes rolling up into their head
- Trembling/shaking
- Ears riniging (from gunshot)
HOPE THIS HELPED!
Some Henry and Audrey sketches. I just think the two protagonists teaming up would be neat. XD
THIS IS AMAZING!!!!!
I need more Henry.
second painting, say hello to
Elymas: @animal-guardian
and
Abel: by twisted-wind (on deviantart)