It curled at the corners of her lips a little more, her laugh a little more real this time as she remembered all too well the look on his face as they’d watched the little window tell them what she already knew. Pregnant. He’d been over the moon, she’d been no different, and for a moment there hadn’t been a single worry over what they’d do, their only thought had been the fact that they’d be parents; together. “You stayed with me,” she continued on, “you didn’t even wanna’ leave me to go to class the next day, I had to convince you that I’d be fine.” From day one, he’d worried over her, as if the smallest thing might change their world again; as if it’d all been a dream and they’d wake up from it too soon. “I remember that you stayed up while I tried to sleep. You were..–” She smiled a little more looking across at him as she remembered how eager he’d been, “looking up everything you could about pregnancies and what I should or shouldn’t do, what I couldn’t eat.. I had to pry the laptop from your hands to get you to try sleep, and even then I don’t think you did.” She, on the other hand had been exhausted. Frowning slightly, McKenna paused and held her hand up for a moment as she stood up and crossed the room, pulling out a drawer to dig through a small box of cards, letters, small keepsakes she’d kept until she found a small crumpled piece of paper. “When I woke up you were working on this.” Despite the fact that she had every intention in giving it to him, she hesitated for a moment, the list of baby names in her hand seemed like a silly thing to keep when their own daughter was already here in the flesh, but it was a memory; she’d never loved Matthew more than she had when she’d seen how truly excited he’d been for the next step in their lives, it was how she knew she would have been completely okay with putting her life on hold for a little while. McKenna held it out for him, the paper folded all too many times in the past, “I think this was the third list you made, you had ink all over your cheek and I just..–” The sharp intake of air was necessary as she stopped, lips pursing as she retracted her steps to grab for the bottle of water she’d sat beside her gym bag earlier.
The words flowed of a memory that only briefly returned to him, providing few details in what had been a huge ordeal for the pair of them. A hand curled over his mouth, fingers pressing into his jaw. His eyes didn’t leave her face, focusing on it as the words slipped past her lips. The night they found out they would be having a baby recounted for him. There was a feeling deep within him that told him he’d been happy, unimaginably so from learning that Kenna was pregnant. So why, if he had been that happy, couldn’t he remember all the details of the night? If what she was saying was true, this would have been one of the happiest days of his life. And he could hardly remember it. Nostrils flared from the sudden release of air that had been held within his lungs for an extended amount of time. It had taken years for Matthew to come to terms with the fact that he may never remember all the years of his life, all the cherished moments that he’d lived. But sitting here, listening to such a meaningful moment in both of their lives, it created such an ache in his chest that he wasn’t certain he’d ever get over. For the most part, he’d been listening without reaction, taking in the words hoping to piece together the memory that was struggling to return. But when she stood up, his hand dropped away from his face, Matthew stirring to stand up. Only to be halted by her return, the crumpled paper in her hand. Brows crashed together, confusion apparent in his features. His gaze shifted from her own to the paper within her hands, until she was holding it out to him. Fingers gently took it from her, eyes dropping down to what was unmistakably his own handwriting. There was an inhale of air, teeth catching at the insides of his cheeks. Baby names, both male and female, were scribbled on any visible surface of the paper. He recognized a few of them, jotted down from family members that bore the same name. “We didn’t even choose from the many that I’d written that night,” he spoke hesitantly, eyes still dancing across the page.