head, head, head, head. stop rotting away! the feelings, the tears— they hide away, inside me, within me..., somewhere i cannot feel or perceive. an enormous garden resides here, too big for me to explore every corner. there, they hide and i cannot seem to suppres the anguish of their absence. where are you, where do i find you. don't let me go back to the little corner in my mind where i sit restless, lifeless. desperation fills me up. i float around and look down. after a terminal eternity i find you. come to me, embrace me, kiss me! what's the news? waterfalls flow down my countenance and in pain i lay next to you. the stitches in my heart become loose and soon my mind believes that the beating force is my mouth. i cannot speak. silence is back and it is here to speak for me. i am a fountain of blood in the shape of a man who has failed to represent nature this time. looking up i find the haven within my contorted self. wandering in half-felt emotions that intensify with obsene conformity. drag me down from this world. pull me out of the strings that hold my bones. scrape off the clay that hides my body. manifest yourself before me. save me, save me, save me.
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2087