fight like a girl

Nadeya Roshan | Water Nymph | Former Air Force | Firefighter

[nadeyaroshan]

shilohseddik‌:

He was surprised to see this side of her, if he were being completely honest. Hadn’t Lethe lost people before? They’d had fires before, there was that night last year that everyone went out of control. And yet this was her turning point, Clark Segen’s death among others’ injuries. He held her tight for a few moments before finally letting her go, stepping back from the smell of ash and dust and flames that stuck to her. “No offense, Deya, but… can we clean you up a bit? And then I’ll be more than happy to lend you some clothes.”

He didn’t like when people said ‘underneath all that x, is a pretty woman/handsome man. X of course being hair, dirt, fat, you name it. He hated things like that, so he decided not to say this aloud. Because it wasn’t about wanting her to be beautiful, she could do that any day of the week. It was about her being clean and comfortable. Who wanted to sleep in actually visible particles of dirt? He couldn’t let her go to sleep like that, not just because it was his house but because of her own health to be concerned over. He led Deya to the bathroom and got a towel for her. About to leave, he stared for a moment, making sure she had everything she needed.

Deya nodded slowly, pulling away from him and wiping at her filthy face. “Yeah.” Part of her brain wanted to tell her that some of this ash might even be some of Clark and that thought made her want to cry even harder, to just give up all together. She followed him to the bathroom and paused as he went to the doorway, unable to believe how weak she was being. It made her want to cry again. Why was everything making her cry tonight? She hated it, felt weak and pathetic.

“Shiloh?” she whispered quietly, voice shaking a little. “Will you stay? Just.. Just sit on the toilet and talk to me or... I’m not asking you to stare, I can go behind the curtain and- I just- I don’t want- I don’t-” The truth was that it kept replaying in her head, the smoke, the flames, the screams, the smell. It felt like it was never going to stop.

[nadeyaroshan]

sam-roshan‌:

“A text, right,” he says flatly, his eyes flickering to the phone in his hand. He does have one, he’s looked it over a thousand times since the newspaper arrived this morning. It doesn’t settle him, and Sam returns his gaze to hers. “Nadeya, I didn’t even know something happened yesterday till I saw this.” In his other hand, he unrolls a newspaper with its black-and-white pictures of the parades end and the unnamed list of people wounded, or dead. His fingers are digging into the paper, no doubt making it crinkle though this morning his hearing is worse than usual. He stares, brought short by the fiery look on her face. “You sent a text, and then the next morning I find out about all this. I didn’t even know if you made it to Shiloh’s house! You could have been dead for all I knew!” Its not a shout, but its edging towards one. If this is what she’s felt these last few decades waiting for his replies then he has no idea how she so easily let him back into her life. “You’re the only family left, I don’t want to find out you died in a bloody newspaper. Or at all really. Why didn’t you come home, or tell me more? You would have sent paragraphs before,” he says, thinking of her youth and the mountains of letters he received from her, some as thick as novels.

@nadeyaroshan

Deya stared at him for a long moment, unable to believe how angry he looked, how disappointed. As if he even had a right to be disappointed in her? He had thrown that away a long time ago. “I’m sorry,” she said flatly, “I didn’t know I needed to keep you in the loop on town events. Not really used to you giving a shit again.” The words were cruel, biting, and she instantly knew that she shouldn’t have said it, but she couldn’t help herself or stop it now and she definitely couldn't apologize for it. “Maybe before I would have, Sam, but that’s before! you don’t get to show back up here after years and suddenly be my guardian again! We’ve been dancing around this for months- Things aren’t normal! It’s not like it used to be just because you decided to grace my life with your presence!” Her voice cracked, her face was full of emotions (anger, sadness, hurt), and she hated that her vulnerability was so clear, that the fact that she needed her brother was written all over her face, even if it was hidden behind cutting words.

[nadeyaroshan]

terminatvs‌:

January wouldn’t call herself a habitual person. A statement like that would imply a certain amount of predictability that she didn’t want people to expect. But underneath what she preferred, January did start her day early by choice. She worked out in the morning and then took a break for tea or a protein shake, something to hold her over for a bit. Today, she was having some tea.

She stretched out her legs, resting them on the small table in front, and closed her eyes. The post-parade emotions were much more palatable; she didn’t mind the general mood around the town. For the most part, people felt the way people normally did after a shared, public tragedy. She opened her eyes when she heard a voice. “Why would I be?” She took in the sight. Even if the people of Lethe annoyed her, she had to give it to them, some of them were fit. “I get more done if I don’t sleep my day away.”

Deya watched her curiously before saying, “Yeah, that’s how I see it. I’ve always been like this but the Air Force didn’t leave time for slacking, so it got pretty ingrained.” She readjusted her stance and eyed the woman again, not used to running into other people at this time. Well, other people who were also alive anyways, but she was pretty sure by the response she got that this woman did also sleep. “But a lot of people sleep in, so it’s nice to see someone pretty awake at this point in the day.”

[nadeyaroshan]

briarbishop‌:

Date: October 14, 2020 Time: 6:50pm Location: [shop or bar]

“Maybe - just maybe - if you wanted your package on time, you shouldn’t have waited so long to update your address. Its here, I’m here, pay the delivery fee.” She waits, hand out-stretched, and when the customer only stares her down, she curls her hand into a fist, reaching for him. Then stops abruptly, snarling silently, thinking of her last altercation with someone in town. The fading bruise on her face is proof enough of failure, but Briar smiles, a tad smugly, and yanks the package closer to her. “Fine, be that way. You already paid for it, and signed for it. Who wants a… What is this?” She asks aloud, frowning, ripping it open to yank the object out inside, holding it up for the taking.

Deya arched an eyebrow, a grin pulling at her lips as she watched the entire thing unfold in front of her. She couldn’t help it; she already felt like the woman was a long awaited comrade. She got up and moved over to her, looking at the object. “I genuinely have no idea who would even want that,” she said blatantly. “It looks like- Is that Santa and Mrs Clause salt and pepper shakers? That’s...” She let out a low whistle before grinning again and pointing at the woman. “But you. I like you.” She held out her hand. “I’m Deya.”

[nadeyaroshan]

Date: 10-12-2020 Time: 7:00 AM Status: closed with @terminatvs

After the parade, Deya’s daily run had gotten more intensive and longer, as if if she tried hard enough she could escape everything building in her head. Of course, it didn’t work like that but it only made her work harder, push herself to go faster. 

She slowed to a stop finally, beside a house on pure coincidence, pausing to stretch her arms and give her legs a small rest. She looked over towards the property, pausing as she recognized January there. “Hey,” she greeted, raising her voice. “You’re one of the only people not half asleep at this time.”

[nadeyaroshan]

shilohseddik‌:

It was midnight, but of course he was still awake. Watching the news, wishing he had a dog to pet, anything. He wasn’t expecting a knock on the door, and if anything it should’ve been Adam. But no. When he opened it, it was Deya. She was covered in soot and her hair was dirty. God. 

Shiloh opened his arms immediately, before opening his mouth. He wrapped his arms around the woman, uncaring if he got dirt on himself. “Come in,” he said calmly. “God Deya. Do you need to crash here? I… I can find some clean clothes for you to wear. You can take a shower and I’ll sleep on the couch. Or we can watch movies all night. Oh my God Deya I’m so sorry.” He wanted to hug her a second time but she seemed so numb and broken at the same time. He knew why she was so stoic, what had hurt her so much. He knew about Clark’s death, and sure he liked the guy but he fixed his garbage disposal a few times and taught him about cleaning his gutters. That was about it.

There was something about letting herself fall into Shiloh’s arms that made her want to break, made her come so close to crying that it was jarring. She nodded slowly, swallowing thickly as she reached to brush her forehead for no real reason at all. “Okay,” she said in a hoarse voice instead, still trying so hard not to crack. “Can, um... Can I borrow a sweater?”

She wasn’t cold. The truth was that she could still feel the heat of the flames on her, but she wanted the comfort of the fabric, wanted to be able to smell his familiar scent. But instead she could still smell the smoke, even the scent of burning flesh wafting from the building (though that might mostly be in her mind, she wasn’t even sure at this point). “I’m s-sorry. I probably shouldn’t have c-” She closed her eyes and when she opened them the tears were welling much more stubbornly than before. “I just needed yo-” Her voice cracked off as the tears finally started rolling fiercely down her cheeks, her hands coming up to cover her face in a sad attempt to hide it. She didn’t do this. She didn’t cry, much less in front of anyone else. And she didn’t have a right to cry. He wasn’t her partner, wasn’t her father, just a friend that she couldn’t save. She could feel the tears leaving lines down the soot still on her face (she knew she hadn’t cleaned it well enough, hadn’t bothered to), proof and evidence of her inability to stay strong.

[nadeyaroshan]

Date: September 23, 2020 Time: 9:15 AM Status: Closed with @sam-roshan

Exhaustion rang through her entire body even the morning after the parade, her mind and heart still heavy with the events that had transpired, with her inability to do anything about it at all. She was a water nymph and she had still failed at her job. How could that even happen?

Deya’s hands were in her pockets as she walked down the street towards home, stopping when she heard her name. Sam. She turned slowly, already frustrated because they were so close to the house. But he sounded pissed, and she was on edge herself, and there was no way they were waiting until they got home to have this discussion. “I texted you,” she told him before anything else, tone almost accusing. “I told you I was staying at Shiloh’s.”

[nadeyaroshan]

Date: September 22, 2020 Time: 9 PM Location: Shiloh Seddik's House Status: Closed with @shilohseddik

She was covered in soot and dirt, though she had since washed off her hands and face, but there was something about tonight she couldn't shake. She's seen death before. It was ugly and it was cruel, but it wasn't numbing anymore. Tonight was different.

Clark was a pillar of the town, a face that was comforting to see. He was the kind of person who wasn't easy to come by, the kind who was just special. And he was dead, gone in one of the worst ways to die, and she had had to see his family and how could you recover from that?

She wanted to go home to Sam, but that felt too indulgent, too childlike. She was an adult and things were different with them, no matter how hard they pretended. It was different. They were different, and they seemed refuse to talk about it. So without even realizing where she was going, she had ended up here.

Deya lifted her shaking hand to knock on the door, her face blank in the way that betrayed her pain, made it obvious, and she hated it. She couldn't cry. She didn't have a right to cry. Clark had been her friend but not family, and she was supposed to be different, supposed to be strong and independent and unfazed. She wasn't supposed to be the girl who cried, yet she could feel it welling.

As soon as the door opened, she looked up at the familiar face, the features and lines that she knew by heart, and felt tears well in her eyes and her voice crack on a broken, "Hi."

[nadeyaroshan]

shilohseddik‌:

“No one could attack you, Deya, and get away with it,” he said, a little too sincerely, before averting his gaze and attention. He smiled when she fessed up to tormenting those she loved. At least she was honest. 

They arrived in the break room and Shiloh got the food out. “You needed a sense of normalcy,” he echoed quietly. “Things will never be what they were, people change. Adam’s a Riverborn now, Sam is a vampire…” He let his voice trail off, knowing what she meant about things being wrong. Adam was wrong. He was nice and sweet and amazing, but not the same. He loved the ‘new’ Adam, but missed the old one. And felt… guilty for feeling both things. He should be grateful to have what he had. He should be grateful to have any given day with those he loved. And yet he was selfish. “Yeah, I’m surprised to see you out of uniform. Um… I mean…” Suddenly a vet technician barged in and smiled at Deya, then reported to Shiloh that his 3 o’clock rescheduled for the end of the week. His day was officially open. Huh. “Thank you, Amber.” The young woman nodded and left the two alone. “What kind of cake did you say it was? You’re driving.” Shiloh closed the lid on the kushari, licked the fork clean, then rinsed it in the sink and placed it in the dishdrainer. He was ready to go. 

Deya grinned at him easily, though the expression dimmed a little at the seriousness of the topic. “Yeah, I guess,” she said quietly, eyes glancing to the ground. “I hate that. Change. I mean... God, it sucks, doesn’t it?” She looked at Shiloh with a look that was entirely real and vulnerable, more vulnerable than she liked to be with most people. But Shiloh had always been different. He wasn’t ‘most people’, had never been most people.  Their relationship had shifted a lot over the years, from something almost motherly to pure friendship to... She wasn’t sure what it had become.

She glanced at him, slightly amused at his words. “I’m out of uniform all the time,” she said. “I just don’t always hop on your desk in a sports bra.” Slowly, she bit at her lip and cocked her head to the side. “Or is that your point?” It was innocent teasing. Mostly. Sort of. Slowly, she slid onto her feet and glanced after his technician, feeling a random and strange shot of jealousy that didn’t even make sense. She shook her head and motioned to him to follow before going outside and to his car, holding out her hand. “Keys? Or you could jog with me.”

[nadeyaroshan]

jproctors‌:

He ran up to a group of people, infuriated at himself more than anything. “Has anyone seen a tortoise running around? Well, you know, not… fuck it.” He turned in circles, trying to wonder where Butter would go. He stopped someone on the street who was trying to dodge him. Whoops. “Have you seen Butter? She’s this big… well, you know what a tortoise is. Christ, I don’t even know… fuck. I checked the stairs and there were no remains, but she could technically be on any floor of the apartment building… Oh my God I’m dead. I’m dead but I’m dead.” 

“You lost Butter?!” Deya looked up at him instantly as her jaw slowly dropped. “Dude, she will kill you fucking dead. I don’t know how you kill a lich, but she will kill you.” Suddenly, she felt bad for trying to dodge him. The truth was that this was one of those days where she was sick of everything and wanted to work out till she dropped. But this was worth it; both she could help him, and it was amusing as hell. “Dude, what the- How did this happen? Where did you- Oh dude.” She shook her head and grabbed his upper arm, pulling him along with her as she examined the stairwell. “Okay, we’ll find her. Don’t worry. God, you better love me.”

[nadeyaroshan]

Date: August 25, 2019 Status: Closed with @alizamor

James and Aliza had become a core part of Deya’s life, probably from working with James for as long as she had and the relationship between him and the lamia. But it didn’t much matter the reason for the closeness. They had been much-needed friends for her, always there, always willing to listen, even if she couldn’t bring herself to outwardly say what was bothering her. They were somehow always there. 

Deya poked her head inside of Aliza’s office, a slow grin sliding over her face. “I haven’t eaten all day, can we go to lunch, please? Because you love me?”

[nadeyaroshan]

xhammerhorrorx‌:

Sky nodded her head and processed all of Nadeya’s idea’s. She hadn’t fully considered them, because she believed the Earhart situation had been talked about so much, but this was an interesting angle. “Are we also saying if it had just been a man who disappeared would they have done more research into figuring out what went wrong? Like what about her had been so controversial to bury the lead’ Sky mused for a moment before a smile fell on her face. She loved telling other people about lesser known mysteries because they stayed around because of word of mouth. “ Basically. There are a lot of loose ends and her death is still marked as a homicide.even after all this time. She’s just another one in the long list of people who may have died in connection to him” 

Deya snapped her fingers and pointed at the other woman. “Oh, you bet your ass we’re saying that.” She had never been quiet about her feministic ideas, or about how passionate she was on the subject. And Sky was absolutely right; if it was a man, they’d have a body by now or have ruled out the area. The fact that neither had happened was startling. “Exactly. What, oh, what did our Amelia get herself into outside of flying? And did she really crash on her own or was there outside involvement?” This was exactly why Sky was so much fun, she thought to herself idly. “No, I get that. Deaths all just spiraled from him and his covered all of them. Nobody really looked that deep into it. Not deep enough, because you’re right. there has to be a connection.”

[nadeyaroshan]

jproctors‌:

James looked over to his coworker, locking eyes with her and deadpanned “Never.” He continued driving and after a moment Nadeya started talking again. “Tight leash–a werewolf joke,” he offered a smile at her, tilting his head to face her before looking back at the road. “Hell, maybe there’s parenting night schools in Lethe, how best to keep your child under wraps.” He made an ‘I dunno’ grunt and pulled into the fire station, parking in the back with all the other white pickup trucks. Before getting out, however, James became rather honest. “I don’t want kids, though. For personal reasons.” I might fuck them up, he thought silently. He only knew what his parents had taught him, and they didn’t win any awards. “And I’m sure Aliza doesn’t because she’s such a workaholic,”–it was what he loved about her, if truth be told–“but what about you? You’d make a good mom. There are those single moms who get a sperm donor, and in Lethe you can pick the species. Or are you waiting for someone? Or just… not interested?” He hadn’t meant to pry, but he just kept fucking talking. Still however, with the car still running, he stayed perfectly still, looking over at his coworker, eyes asking for forgiveness and intel.

Deya snorted and shook her head at James’s werewolf joke, throwing him an amused expression. “Nice,” she said, tone nothing if not affectionate. “If that’s a class, you and I should teach it. I think we tolerate very little bullshit and we’re sort of known for it. Plus, we’re firefighters. Who doesn't want to listen to firefighters?” It was hard to keep a straight face then because, well, many people didn’t want to listen to firefighters. Her hand had already moved to the handle when he spoke and her eyes softened as she looked at him with interest. “Alright. That’s fair,” she told him. “Honestly, nobody ever needs to feel like they need kids to complete them and it’s no different for you two. You’re one of Lethe’s power couples, so whatever you’re doing, you’re doing it right.” Her relationship with James was odd; they were mostly the kind of friends and coworkers who judged others, made snarky comments, and rolled their eyes at everyone else. But sometimes things got real, and she didn’t actually hate that. She took a slow breath as he spoke, glancing at the dashboard as she processed his words. It wasn’t as if she never thought about it, or as if she had no interest at all. She didn’t dislike kids, she enjoyed kids rather a lot (more than she wanted it known actually). But... Was she actually someone who could raise them? Her patience had never been something to brag about, and when it came to relationships, she wasn’t the easiest to get close to. But... It wasn’t crossed out either. “I dunno,” she admitted after she had decided to answer openly. “I like kids. And if I wanted kids... I’m not afraid to do it alone. Often I think I want them, eventually, but... I... Really, James, I don’t know what’s holding me back. It’s like... I’m not sold on it being a good idea in the long run, but I really couldn’t tell you why.”

[nadeyaroshan]

haunted-haller‌:

Ramsey tilted her head slightly as she looked up at the other woman and observed her for a moment before speaking. She was still figuring her way around the town and her typically social behavior was slightly distracted by her bandit friend under the dumpster.”Something. There are no bodies in the dumpster today. “ She replied finally breaking her gaze to look back towards the dumpster. “ No I’m new. I dumpster dive sometimes for materials for some projects, but I’m fresh out of the oven here. “

Deya’s lips quirked in amusement as she watched the woman before glancing back at the dumpster. “That’s a shame. My day was pretty boring, finding a body would bring it some life, I think.” She glanced back at the woman and nodded. She knew what it was like to be new when she was in the military, but not in Lethe. It had always been home. Was it strange, to some, to be able to be so in the open? “Oh, well, I’m caught up now then. Do you need a hand with... Whatever this is?”

[nadeyaroshan]

shilohseddik‌:

“1990? Yikes, I know what market you’ve been supporting,” he jived back at the friendly foe. “Well what is it today? Who deserves your wrath of torment and lie-spreading?” Shi chuckled. It was all exaggerations, for Nadeya was a very good person, very good at what she did and was honorable and sweet and caring. Before his father got remarried, when Shiloh was very young he thought of Deya as a replacement mother, someone to fill the void that his own mother left. He practiced his instruments around her, his nymphisms, and confided in her. As they grew up, her leaving the nest then coming back, their relationship matured along with them, and his health deteriorated. He was all skin and bones now. 

He was sitting at his desk and looked up at Deya above his eyeglasses before taking them off. He wasn’t going to get any work done, was he? “So what are you doing here? Is it a break you need from work? Your day off? Come to pet the animals or steal some of my food?” Ah, food. He had forgotten to eat lunch. Diligently, he stood up from his desk and motioned for her to follow him to the break room. In the hall you could hear the animals yelping and barking for attention, but when he closed the door to the scant room with barely a single counter and one small circular table with four chairs, it was much quieter. “Or did you come to talk about Adam?” he asked quietly, pulling the food from the fridge. “I brought kushari, your favorite,” he said with a hint of a smile, trying to de-stress. He wouldn’t tell the truth though and confess it was almost a week old, since he kept forgetting to bring food or eat what he had at work.

Deya felt her jaw drop into an expression of mock shock, though she was caught slightly off guard. For some reason, she never quite expected those jokes from him. Maybe it was because she remembered when he was small, even if he and their relationship had grown so much since then. “That is so rude! Wow! It must be the day to attack me then.” She reached out to shove lightly and playfully at his shoulder before leaning back on her hand that was perched on the desk. “For the record, I do not spread lies or torme- Okay, I torment sometimes. But I am very honest.” She pointed at him accusingly as if to make her point.

“Also, excuse you, saying that I can’t do both. I can pet animals and steal your food so-” She followed him easily into the break room, as if on cue. “And, actually, I came to make sure that you were eating, so I’m glad that you apparently are, and yes, thank you, I will indeed eat with you.” She flashed him a light grin, easily covering how much she truly did worry about him. The truth was that Shiloh was as close to a constant as she had, really. With Sam just getting back to town recently, and Adam just resurfacing, everything felt off-balance except for him. She cleared her throat easily and motioned at him. She watched him, wondering how he always managed to get to the bottom of it so easily. “Maybe a little,” she admitted lightly. “Not... Not totally. But... It’s just. It’s weird. And I know you feel it too so... That and Sam being back... Things are just.. It’s like someone is trying to make a copy of how things used to be but everything is coming out botched.” Honesty. vulnerability. They were things that only Shiloh and Sam could get from her like this. James might have managed if he tried, but he was James. They usually just snarked and judged the townspeople. “Kushari it is. I have a cake at my place, by the way, and you’re welcome to come help me out with it after we’re both off work.” the more food she could get into him the better. And the more company of his that she could get, the better of that too. 

[nadeyaroshan]

xwecpon‌:

“Oh shit.” blurted out Yuri as he eyed her briefly. Have they crossed paths before? “I’m a paramedic. As Emergency Response Units, I’m sure we coulda crossed paths.” The werewolf then nodded in thanks to her duty for their country. “And thank you for your service. Civilian life in Lethe out of all places…Was it your first choice?” Glancing down at his body, he beamed with pride and added, “Thanks! And yeah a paramedic full time, but I sing on the side? That really doesn’t contribute to my form, but I like to train as a hobby. My brother and I tend to spar a lot.” 

Deya nodded her head slowly in recognition. “I thought you looked a little familiar. Well, it’s nice to meet you.” She furrowed her brows as she thought about her statement and shrugged. “Actually, I guess we haven’t. I’m Deya Roshan.” She would have extended her hand, but it was pretty evident that he was occupied, and for the record so was she. She changed positions, starting to do situps. “Your welcome. Thank you.” That wasn’t actually said to her near as often as one might assume. “Yeah, or, mostly. My brother and I moved here when I was nine so it’s home. I wouldn’t really want to be anywhere else. What brought you here?” She pulled into another situp as she replied, “That’s pretty cool though. Both the sparring and the singing on the side. I take it you’re good?”

[nadeyaroshan]

pathforlcrn‌:

“Grocery store.” It didn’t matter if it was the small sort or the big, Mathias needed to pick up some food. He was used to eating out at places due to not having a kitchen or proper tools to cook. However now that he had one of those, a home, he needed to get in the habit of cooking dinner— he also needed to get cooking utensils. There were many things he needed to do now. “Oh I,” A sheepish chuckle fell from his lips. “I uh, I fell– and it was this whole thing and so I finally saw an exitish and went for it.”

Deya’s eyebrow arched in amusement over the word exitish, and glanced at the bushes he had come from. “Okay. Well, that’s... That sounds like you had an adventure. Come on, I show you to the store.” She nodded her head in the direction they were going and started walking, expecting him to fall into step with her if he was coming. “I’m Deya by the way. I take it you’re new?”