Naima Dahmer

; 27 years-old. MARVEL | SLYTHERIN 🐍 | LOTR Italy

[unoffical-marvel]

Tony: sleep? whats that? I've only heard of depression.

[unoffical-marvel]

Steve: when have i ever done something dumb?

Bucky: oh, you wanna know? I keep a list.

Steve:

Bucky: it’s alphabetized.

[unoffical-marvel]

Steve: what are you reading?

Stephen: a book of all the things I hate

Steve, glancing at the book: that’s just a photo album of me

Stephen: oh wow! what a coincidence

[zodiaccity]

What’s your sign?

[aphheadcanonszodiacstyle]

[yharnamgirl]

pls get away from me

[pl4tform9and3quart3rs]

Sirius: Hey Rem, would you say that we are in any way similar?

Remus: Are you kidding, we’re like complete opposites!

Sirius: Great, opposites attract, you have to date me sorry I don’t make the rules, I’ll see you at 7.

[pl4tform9and3quart3rs]

Draco: I was made for this shit. Nothing catches me off guard.

Harry: *smiles*

Draco:

Draco: *whispers* Fuck

[pl4tform9and3quart3rs]

Harry, in a shop: I want the prettiest thing in this entire store

Draco: Well okay, but I’ll warn you, I’m not cheap

[pl4tform9and3quart3rs]

Sirius: Remus I'm sorry

Sirius: Moony?

Sirius: Sweetie pie?

Sirius: Baby?

Sirius: World's prettiest angel?

Sirius: Honey?

Sirius: Beautiful cinnamon roll, too good for this world, too pure?

Remus: Sorry won't bring back my fucking chocolate Sirius

[pl4tform9and3quart3rs]

Nobody:

Pansy: I’m so sick or this shit. As soon as I finish school I’m going to go live in a lesbian colony

[pl4tform9and3quart3rs]

Sirius: Being gay isn't a choice

Sirius: It's a game and I'm winning

[drarrybin]

draco: remember one time i liked you?

harry: no

draco: good because never happened

draco: *whispers* because i’ve always loved you

harry: what

draco: what

[drarrybin]

harry: bye ron

ron: why are you saying goodbye?

harry: well draco’s not talking to me so he’s either planning a date or planning to murder me

ron: why are those the only two options?

harry: name a third

[drarrybin]

draco: tell me i’m pretty

harry: you’re pretty

harry:

harry: fucking beautiful please marry me

[drarrybin]

draco: *making something*

draco: and now let’s add two shots of vodka

draco: *proceeds to pour half the bottle in*

harry: draco, love, is everything okay?

[drarrybin]

harry: i... just want a boyfriend

hermione: it’s about time bitch

harry: alright, what are my options?

hermione: *shows picture of cedric* alright so this one has a lot of money and would treat you good and you’d be set for life

hermione: *shows picture of dean* this one would be really nice to you and he treats his mum well

hermione: *shows picture of collin creevey* this one is totally obsess with you and in love with you

hermione: *shows picture of draco* actually this one- this one doesn’t want you at all so ignore that one and uh this-

harry: wait. why doesn’t that one want me?

hermione: doesn’t matter. he would treat you like shit anyway. and he’s 5’9 so just ignore it

harry: but- but what’s his name?

hermione: are you serious? you have all these options

harry: yeah i want that one. the one that doesn’t want me, that’s the one i want

hermione: dumb. dumb as hell

harry: can i have that one please?

hermione: sure, take it. i don’t give a fuck. just take it