Jameela Jamil photographed by Coliena Rentmeester for Red UK Magazine (February 2019)
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda

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RMH

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

Andulka
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
we're not kids anymore.
Sweet Seals For You, Always

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Keni

Kaledo Art
NASA

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roma★
trying on a metaphor
will byers stan first human second

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@neelafloro
Jameela Jamil photographed by Coliena Rentmeester for Red UK Magazine (February 2019)
hydefloro:
The text had floored him. Hyde always hoped to hear from Neela again, hoped that she would come back to town. He’d dreamed about it, prayed for it. But he hadn’t expected it. Not on this particular day. He had spent the time after replying to her text pacing the floors and, when his nerves got the best of him, taking a few shots. Ignoring the lingering realization that alcohol was becoming an unhealthy crutch. It wasn’t the time to let those skeletons out of the closet. He needed the liquid courage.
There were so many ways he had imagined her return to town. He wanted to pull her into a hug. He wanted to say how terribly he’d missed her. He wanted to laugh and say ‘took you long enough’ and pretend she’d never left. All of that was thrown out when he opened the door. She was beautiful. She’d always been beautiful, but after going so long without seeing her, only in pictures and memories — she was stunning. It was like he was face to face with a stunning stranger. And at the same time… face to face with his best friend. For a moment, he genuinely forgot how to breathe.
“Of course,” he finally managed to say, too caught up in her smile to force one of his own. He stepped back, gesturing for her to walk inside. “You look… nice, you look nice.”
Maybe she shouldn’t be smiling... it would only give Hyde ideas that she wasn’t sure she even wanted to give him in the first place. Not without talking about them properly first. But this was Neela, and Neela had grown up thinking about doing her best and being her best. Sometimes, it required her to wear a smile and act like everything was alright, when in reality, she was crumbling down on the inside. But Hyde---Hyde was probably the one person she had always managed to be herself around, which was why it was so hard for that smile to remain there once she caught a sniff of alcohol while passing by him and into their---his house.
“Have you been drinking?” Neela let out a sigh, her gaze remaining on him for a bare second, before moving around the house as she got reacquainted with it. “Maybe we should hold off the wine, then. It’s best if we remain sober for this conversation... but Hyde---you look like a mess. Have you been eating well? Sleeping?” Of course, she couldn’t help but worrying about him. Legally, they were still married, but their bond went way beyond signatures on a paper. She cared about him... her year away hadn’t changed it, but it was hard. “But um... underneath the tired layer, you do look nice. I’m not sure if I like your hair like that, though...”
parkxjoonho:
“He is pretty cute… It’s hard to argue with that.” Joon returned the smile and watched as she offered her hand towards the pup. Gizmo sniffed her hand before licking and barking a couple more times, which made Joon miss some of what she was saying. “I… think he just gets a little excited around people. Sorry—uh, name? His name is Gizmo. Usually just call him Mo or Momo though. I’m Joon.” He gave a sheepish wave, chuckling before petting his little four legged companion to try and calm him down. “We need to get out more so he can get used to others. It’s a work in progress.”
“Well, his cuteness matches his owner’s.” Neela replied with a smile, only then realizing that most men didn’t like being called cute. There was something in their fragile masculinity that caused them to dread that word. “I hope you don’t feel threatened by the word cute.” She shook her head, running her fingers through her dark hair, rolling her strands up and tying them in a loose bun, before focusing back on the puppy. “Gizmo... does that mean you can’t feed him after midnight? It’s nice to meet you both though. I’m Neela... and I should seriously consider adopting a puppy, because look at this cutie... How long have you had him? Mind if I pet him?”
jinahmin:
“It could go either way. If you were drinking to celebrate, then I don’t think it’s such a bad thing. Drinking out of misery? Then it’s bad.” Jinah gave a small shrug. Looking Neela over, it wasn’t like the older woman appeared to be in a bad state of mind or anything. “Mine was alright. We just stayed in and had a fairly mellow night with a couple friends. It’s almost disappointing to stay home and know you could be a responsible drinker, ringing in the new year, but you can’t drink,” she joked. It wasn’t like it was a big deal; neither her or Seok were big on alcohol.
“Mm... come to think of it, it was mostly celebratory drinks. There could have been a hint of misery involved, but mostly celebration.” Neela laughed softly, waving her hand in the air before taking a sip of her green smoothie to swallow down the lump in her throat as she thought of Hyde for a moment there. “You’ve never been that much of a drinker, as far as I remember... but humor me--why can’t you drink?”
(-- @hydefloro
Coming back to Westwick wasn’t ideal, but Neela knew that it had to be done. Not that she had anything against the city she now considered home, but living away from her responsibilities for about a year now had made her rethink some things. One thing that she couldn’t keep postponing was talking to Hyde. They still have a few things to work on, and after spending as much time apart from him as she did, Neela finally felt confident enough to reach out to him again and try to work on their differences. She still had feelings for him, but some things had to change in order for them to survive, that was for sure.
Granted, she wasn’t going to simply show up at his place uninvited, so, she sent him a text saying she was back in Westwick and asking if he was willing to chat with her, after all, she did leave him without looking back and would completely understand if he didn’t want to see her again. Neela was glad to receive a positive answer, so after a meeting at USC and stopping by a grocery shop to get them a bottle of wine, she went to Hyde’s place---their old house---and knocked on his door. Hopefully they’d be able to come out of this in a good way.
There was a smile on her face when she saw him, although... he did look more tired than what she could remember. it was still a highly familiar face.
“Hyde.” She said, still smiling as she raised her hand to show him the bottle of wine. “Thanks for having me. I brought wine. May I come in?”
3, 15, 38, 52
03: Do you regret anything?
I regret so many things… most of all, I regret getting married so young. I wish I had enjoyed life a little more, even if marrying Hyde wasn’t all that bad. I just feel like I haven’t lived life properly.
15: Have any pets?
Not yet, but I’ve been thinking about adopting a cat. Hopefully it’ll happen soon.
38: Is this year the best year of your life?
Not in the slightest. Despite it having started well, there are still some things here and there that need fixing and I’m currently working on them, but it’s not the worst year of my life either.
52: What makes you happy?
Food, music and being surrounded by the people I love.
60 horrible questions… Fuck it
ABOUT NEELA
AGE: 35 years
BIRTHDAY: 09/02/1984
OCCUPATION: Biomedical engineer and professor at USC
GENDER: Cis Female
NEIGHBORHOOD: Esperance
HAS BEEN IN WESTWICK: She’s been living there since she was 14 years old, left about a year ago and has returned recently.
FACECLAIM: Jameela Jamil
(–trigger warnings: N/A
Born in England to a Pakistani mother and an American father, Neela Dayal spent most of her early childhood running around with her sister in the outskirts of London. Her parents, a very dedicated physical therapist and a strict cardiologist both made sure that their girls were not only raised with love, but also, with ambitions and eyes set on building themselves stellar careers. So Neela grew up with this greed for things. She’d always wanted more than was had been given her, and obviously, she’d work hard to make things possible for herself.
At the age of fourteen, her family moved to Westwick due to a promotion that had been given to Dr. Dayal, to work as the Cardiology chief in Browne Memorial Hospital. In Westwick, Neela was able to blossom even more as both a young woman and the academical prodigy that she’d starting to work on back in England. It was in high school that she met Hyde and that was possibly the biggest turning point in her life. From the moment they met, they seemed to be connected to the hip, and with time, that friendship and care turned into love. They seemed to work well together, she helped him with his studies and with his social skills and he—well, he gave her love. Pure love and companionship. He seemed to be her biggest supporter and for someone who aimed as big as Neela did, she could use all the support from around her. Her family had practically adopted Hyde too, and from the time they had graduated high school, a marriage proposal knocked on her door, swooped her parents off their feet too and there she was, having the cutest little end-of-the-summer wedding with her first love.
College life wasn’t so hard as most people made it out to be. Neela got accepted into USC to study Biomedical engineering. After spending so much time in her mother’s physical therapy’s clinic and getting to hear these stories about war veterans, her future was pretty much set in stone by the time her sophomore year of high school rolled around, and what she really wanted, was to research ways of making body prosthetics more comfortable and better to the ones who needed them. So, since she had that part of her life already decided, it wasn’t hard for Neela to focus on what she needed to focus on for that to happen. The best part was that Hyde also seemed interested in the academic life, so all the pressure their friends were putting on them, asking about babies and all that, she could push to the back of her mind and focus on what mattered.
However, as the time passed, Neela started feeling like she was trapped. It wasn’t like she didn’t love Hyde, because she did. She truly did, but their lives came to a point where his revolved around hers and hers revolved around something else. Neela began feeling suffocated and unhappy, which was not ideal for a marriage. Her career was going great, her social life was amazing and yet, there was still pressure to start a family and Neela didn’t know if it came from within herself or from the ones around her. When the opportunity to spend a few months in London doing some research in the name of UCLA showed up, Neela grabbed with so much strength that it probably gave everyone around her a whiplash, including Hyde. With the excuse of needing some time away, she left.
She never asked for the divorce, she never completely removed him from her life—at least not in her mind. Although she didn’t keep in touch with Hyde, there were moments where she missed him deeply, but there was always the doubt of it being missing the comfort of being married or Hyde himself. After she was done with her research, Neela ended up staying for some months more, trying to actually find herself and figure everything out that was keeping her from being happy. And even though she hadn’t completely figured it out, Neela’s back in Westwick and to a brand-new job as a professor at her Alma Mater that she is very confident about. Now, she just need to figure out what her next step with Hyde will be, whether they’ll try and work on it or if she’ll just file for the divorce.
✓ social, organized, hard-working ✘ perfectionist, demanding, over-critical
This role is played by Bru
“Oh…my good lord this is good…” Kaira moaned happily when she took a bite of the cookie she brought from a bakery in De Flores. She also had a cupcake too and wanted to eat it, but the cookie was so good that she just had to savor it. “Want some?”
“I’m actually trying to cut back on my sugar intake...” Neela chuckled as she shook her head. For one thing, it was nice to back in Westwick. People seemed to be---nicer there, offering cupcakes and cookies to strangers. “But thank you, though. You are--?”
Having a dog was still a very new experience for Joon but any chance he got, he was practically glued to the pup. He figured that wasn’t such a bad thing though. It helped with training. And Gizmo already seemed to get protective because the second someone came close to them, Gizmo stopped playing around and backed himself into Joon’s lap while giving a couple barks. “It’s okay,” Joon reassured his pup before looking up at the company with a smile. “He’s a harmless ball of fluff, promise. I still can’t tell if that’s his way of saying he’s scared or if he thinks he’s ferocious.” Which was partially a joke because Joon could easily pick him up with one hand.
“He’s way too adorable for words.” Neela smiled, crouching down so she could stretch her hand for the puppy to sniff it. “He seems ferociously protective of you, that’s a good sign. What’s his name?”
“Kind of funny that the new year rolls around and it feels like it doesn’t start until noon.” Everything just seemed so quiet but maybe that was because Jinah felt like she was one of the few that didn’t drink the previous night. “How was your new year’s celebration?”
“Is it bad that I don’t really remember much about my new year’s celebration?” All that Neela remembered was that she was with some friends from England who had come to Westwick for the holidays. “Too much alcohol involved. How was yours?”
Jameela Jamil attends the 24th annual Critics’ Choice Awards at Barker Hangar on January 13, 2019 in Santa Monica, California (Source: Emma McIntyre/Getty Images North America)