I'm a Warrior of God

UNDER REBOOT || indie Castiel rp blog || mutuals only

[artistcastiel]

Watching a little grey fish heave itself up on the beach and an older brother saying, "don't step on that fish, Castiel. Big plans for that fish."

[holoescene]

GENTLE PSA;   the best way to interact with me is through memes.  you could send that thing @ me even though i’ve posted it five months ago and i’d still answer and appreciate it.  it’s hard to think up starters out of the blue unless they’re plotted,  but memes are just good and gives you a general idea of what’s happening.  so please,  if you see a meme on my blog,  SEND THE MEME.

[nerdycelestial]

The big downside to try and come back after having been gone for this long is that pretty much everyone I rped with are now gone.

[charlie-bradcherry]

#ConfuzzledBean

[nerdycelestial]

“Any chance you got everything we need right here in this room?”

spn s4 starters || @learnedlucidity

Castiel looked around before shaking his head. “No, this require rather specific items that can’t be substituted with anything here.” Of course it did. Lately Cas seemed to be having a stroke of bad luck, if you were inclined in believing in such things. Cas wasn’t really sure he did. “I will try and get what is needed. You should stay here.”

[nerdycelestial]

“Angels are Warriors of God. I’m a Soldier.”

⚔ Read rules and bio before interaction.

          ⚔ Mutuals only.

                    ⚔ No smut.

                              ⚔ Main verse is set in s4-5.

[rp-meme-glaceon]

Send a symbol for your muse to find mine...

🌷- Alone

🥀- Dying

🤕- Injured/sick

☠️- Dead

🐥- Alive

😈- Possessed

👻- As a ghost

😼- Transformed into an animal/monster

🦋- In a joyful mood

☔️- In a somber mood

☀️- Overheated

☃️- Shivering from the cold

💫- Dazed and dizzy

💦- Crying

🍇- Extremely hungry

🏇🏻- Being chased

🗜- Stuck in a trap

🔮- In a dream

🛌- Bedridden

📖- Reading/studying

🎍- Tending to a shrine/visiting a grave

🌼- Caring for some plants

⭐️- Stargazing

☄️- In a dangerous situation

[rpmemes-galore]

Supernatural — Season 5  {Sentence Starters}

“You’ll never punish me as much as I’m punishing myself.”

“You gonna hate me any less? Am I gonna hate myself any less?”

“I know you don’t trust me. Just, now I realize something. I don’t trust me either.”

“I can do this. I can. I’m gonna prove it to you.”

“Is this a fight? Are we in a fight?”

“You gave yourself your own nickname? You can’t do that.”

“You’re damn right you didn’t listen. You were reckless and selfish and arrogant.”

“Would you believe I’m actually trying to protect you?”

“I have to believe someone can make the right choice, even if I couldn’t.”

“You better kill me now! Or I swear, I will find a way to kill you.”

“Do we have any chance of surviving this?”

“But I just can’t keep pretending that everything’s all right. Because it’s not.”

“Yes. I’ll just wait here then.”

“You know I’d never hurt you. Not really.”

“Yes, I’m a fan, but I really don’t appreciate being mocked.”

“Oh, you know, I thought you were supposed to be impressive.”

“I’m gonna warn you, when I come back, I’m gonna be pissed.”

“And I lost everything, for nothing. So keep your opinions to yourself.”

“I would give anything, anything, to take it all back.”

“You can think whatever you want. I deserve it, and worse.”

“I would love to have the sex with you.”

“You’ve come a long way to see this, haven’t you?”

“I guess I’m a little numb with the earth-shattering revelations at this point.”

“Well don’t worry, because I won’t make that mistake again.”

“I’m having a hard time forgiving and forgetting here. You know?”

“I don’t think that we can ever be what we were. You know? I just don’t think I can trust you.”

[rpmemes-galore]

Supernatural — Season 4  {Sentence Starters}

“I’m trying to come up with a theory here. Okay? Work with me.”

“You’re gonna get me some pie.”

“Know where I can get any reception?”

“What’s the matter? You don’t think you deserve to be saved?”

“Look, I just need time, okay? That’s all.”

“Any chance you got everything we need here in this room?”

“I don’t know if what I’m doing is right. Hell, I don’t even know if I trust you.”

“If you’re going to shoot, shoot! Don’t talk!”

“I can’t really stop you, but just don’t treat me like I’m an idiot, okay?”

“That’s a hell of an art project you’ve got going there.”

“So, are you just gonna stand there and tell me everything is all good?”

“Don’t be too hard on yourself, you couldn’t have stopped it.”

“Even if this sounds really weird, will you promise me that you will remember?”

“I thought you would be one of them. I was wrong.”

“Look, you can’t just shoulder this thing alone. You gotta let me help.”

“You don’t have to apologize, I believe you.”

“I don’t envy the weight that’s on your shoulders. I truly don’t.”

“Well, that’s it. I’m torching everybody.”

“How could you do this to me? I thought we were gonna be normal.”

“No matter how many people I save, I can’t change that.”

“Who do I have to kill to get some french fries around here?”

“I have doubts. I don’t know what is right and what is wrong anymore.”

“Get the hell out of here. There’s no such thing.”

“What, do you get your freak on by watching other people sleep? What do you want?”

“Look, all I know is that I was not… groped by an angel.”

“But what I do know is that I’m saving people.”

“I like to think it’s because of my perky nipples.”

“Look pal, I’m not buying what you’re selling, so who are you really?”

“Bad crap happens to good people. That’s how it is.”

[nerdycelestial]

Theme fixed. Now I just need to go through bio, rules etc and add those to the links.

[nerdycelestial]

Bio and rules fixed. Will link to my wishlist and open starters once I’ve gone through them.

[nerdycelestial]

Theme fixed. Now I just need to go through bio, rules etc and add those to the links.

[nerdycelestial]

[nerdycelestial]

I really did my best to get back to Castiel, but I don’t really feel it. I’m not really certain what has changed, just that it has. So for now, I’ll put this blog on a hiatus of unknown length of time.

If you want to contact me, you’re welcome to do so on my Spock rp blog or my MultiMuse rp blog.

[bold-sartorial-statement]

I commissioned this from @sketchydean and it’s 100% awesome. Cas in all his vessels, being peeved. I love the detail with the broken halo.

[spctlessminds]

this ask meme is based on the blog gravesuggestion.  i’ve divided it up into two categories  ( light  &  dark )  based on the themes.  some of these can be somewhat triggering seeing that the darker ones deal with a lot of death mentions.  please be cautious before continuing on!!

L I G H T

‘  at night i dream of you.  ’ ‘  don’t give up yet.  you still have time to fix things.  ’ ‘  falling in love with someone else is not a personal attack.  ’ ‘  i am still so weak when it comes to you.  ’ ‘  i can’t believe i let myself let you down.  ’ ‘  i don’t care where we go when we die,  as long as i’m with you.  ’ ‘  i dream of saying to you all the words i held inside until it was too late.  ’ ‘  i feel so warm  &  safe when you talk to me.  maybe i could love you if you’d let me.  ’ ‘  i finally let the right people in  &  i have never felt so loved.  ’ ‘  i like the way your nails paint red stripes along my spine days after you’re gone.  ’ ‘  i lived in your permafrost for twenty years  &  then you looked at me  &  i felt the warmth of spring.  ’ ‘  i once wished you’d leave me alone,  but i take it back.  ’ ‘  i want to be able to love someone else,  but you stretch your arms  &  spread your legs inside my heart so that there is no room for anyone or anything else.  ’ ‘  i want to believe that we got it right this time.  ’ ‘  i wonder how much longer i can cling to your light before it expires completely.  ’ ‘  i would travel across the world to be by your side,  because as long as you are with me,  anywhere is a perfect place to me.  ’ ‘  it took me awhile to realize it myself,  but you are not what other people say you are.  ’ ‘  it’s not that i really need you,  but life would be pretty boring without you around.  there’s no one i would rather be with.  ’ ‘  i’d like to stay like this for awhile.  ’ ‘  life  &  death don’t have to be so boring,  let’s make both an adventure.  ’ ‘  life imitates art,  they say.  i didn’t believe it until i started to notice the way your eyelashes look so much like tiny ink stroke.  ’ ‘  live your life so that when you die,  souls will come for miles just to hear your historic tales.  ’ ‘  make your exes jealous  &  your past self proud.  ’ ‘  maybe you’re what i needed to find in order to move on.  ’ ‘  never get caught falling harder.  they’ll never let you back up.  ’ ‘  please don’t go.  ’ ‘  some days it’s easier to just stop fighting it  &  succumb.  ’ ‘  sometimes,  you’ll find it hard to keep going,  but you always will.  ’ ‘  the desire i feel for you is that same itching,  insidious hunger that an addict has for their addiction.  ’ ‘  the worst thing about you is that you weren’t all bad.  ’ ‘  there is absolutely nothing  &  no one who can stop me.  ’ ‘  there is no route of losing you that is without pain.  ’ ‘  there’s still room for adventure  &  there is no one i’d rather have by my side.  ’ ‘  things didn’t turn out the way i planned,  but i’m alright with that.  ’ ‘  we could be really incredible together,  you know?  ’ ‘  you are beautiful  &  vibrant  &  confident.  you are light  &  laughter incarnate  &  every fiber of your being screams freedom  &  joy.  when i am with you,  i am truly happy.  ’ ‘  you are starlight incarnate,  from the grand way you sway your hips to the wide mysterious way you think.  blessed are any to be loved by you.  ’ ‘  you are too afraid of the future to let go of a past that was never kind to you.  ’ ‘  you call me yours  &  i have no idea what that even means to you.  ’ ‘  you remind me of bubblegum  &  sweets;  soft  &  pink  &  warm.  you are strong in the gentlest way.  you are so stubbornly kind.  i wish i could be like that.  ’ ‘  you still visit me while i sleep sometimes.  your fingers trace my spine  &  i listen to you breathe.  please stop haunting me.  ’ ‘  ‘morbid curiosity’ is a wonderful way to describe how i feel about you.  ’

D A R K

‘  a thousand empty bottles  &  fist fights will never return to us what we lost that day.  ’ ‘  everyone else has moved on,  but i am still here.  ’ ‘  everything about you screams danger.  ’ ‘  everything is worthless to you  &  you,  in turn,  became worthless.  ’ ‘  for once in my life i want to be surrounded by people that i don’t feel like i need to impress.  ’ ‘  freedom is really hard to get used to.  ’ ‘  how could you do this to me?  how fucking could you?  ’ ‘  i am becoming everything we always dreamed of  &  i am leaving you behind.  ’ ‘  i buried you so well that you might as well have died.  ’ ‘  i can rest easy knowing that the person i love is dead  &  not the monster you became.  ’ ‘  i can’t look at you.  not now,  not ever.  ’ ‘  i don’t ask how you’ve been.  what’s the point?  you’d lie anyways.  ’ ‘  i dream of hearing the words i so desperately needed to lay your memory to rest.  ’ ‘  i haunted this house first.  there is no room for you here.  ’ ‘  i have a right to be upset.  i loved them too, you know.  ’ ‘  i just want it to end.  i want it to all go away.  i want to go away.  ’ ‘  i may be a wolf in sheep’s clothing,  but a snake hiding in the skin of a mouse is far more dangerous.  ’ ‘  i saw your face today  &  didn’t feel anything.  i am free.  ’ ‘  i tried to save you,  but you didn’t want to be saved.  you just wanted someone to suffer with you.  ’ ‘  it’s almost as if you were never here.  ’ ‘  it’s unhealthy to do these things,  you tell me.  you say it’s time to stop smoking,  time to stop gambling,  &  dammit,  i f you don’t stop drinking it’ll kill you.  i sure hope you’re right,  darling.  ’ ‘  i’m always pleasantly surprised by how easy it is to kill you in my mind  ’ ‘  i’m not really scared to die.  i’m more afraid that no one will miss me when i’m gone.  ’ ‘  i’m not the person you left behind anymore.  there’s no one here to miss.  ’ ‘  i’ve been dead far longer than i’ve been alive.  ’ ‘  i’ve eaten nothing but flower petals  &  ivy for weeks because i want to be beautiful inside like you.  ’ ‘  i’ve never been completely satisfied.  i most likely will still be unsatisfied long after my death.  ’ ‘  no motive other than pleasure,  my dear.  ’ ‘  one day i’ll go or you will.  either way,  it will be as if i’m losing a piece of myself.  ’ ‘  our dreams  &  promises decay along with you.  ’ ‘  the leaves change,  but nothing else does.  ’ ‘  the only difference between avoiding  &  leaving is that now i’m not waiting up for you.  ’ ‘  there is no such thing as a person who is required to love you.  ’ ‘  there’s only so much that can be done to repair old damage.  ’ ‘  things aren’t going as i hoped.  maybe if i die,  i can start over again?  better luck next time.  ’ ‘  this is not something to be proud of.  this is a tragedy.  ’ ‘  trying to get rid of me?  oh honey,  you’ll have to try much harder than that.  ’ ‘  trying to get under my skin?  you’re nothing more than a pesky itch.  ’ ‘  unlike you,  i can’t hide my identity when it becomes an inconvenience or a danger.  ’ ‘  weeping is for gods  &  martyrs,  we cannot afford such luxuries.  ’ ‘  would you even miss me?  ’ ‘  you are not important enough to earn an eternal place in my heart.  ’ ‘  you complain nonstop about being unloved  &  alone,  i can’t imagine what you’d be like if that were actually true.  ’ ‘  you don’t know what it’s like.  ’ ‘  you made this so fucking easy for me.  ’ ‘  you should see me as a threat.  i will tear down everything you know until there is nothing left of you.  i am a walking threat.  ’ ‘  you think i’m already gone,  but i’m still fighting.  ’ ‘  you think i’m dead,  but i’m just dying.  ’ ‘  you were never an addiction,  you were a fucking disease.  ’ ‘  you wouldn’t dare cross me.  i am god  &  you are the soil beneath my feet.  ’ ‘  your existence takes up so much more space in mine that we might as well be one entity.  ’ ‘  your fingers are so cold  &  bruised,  but you’re still slamming your fists again the barricade as if it makes a difference.  ’ ‘  your hair is tied in a noose  &  your fingernails are razor blades,  your lips are poison  &  i will gratefully kiss them.  ’ ‘  your hatred has a body count  &  we will not forget.  ’ ‘  your loss,  not mine.  ’ ‘  you’re a sick fuck.  you know that?  ’ ‘  you’re not gentle with me  &  i would never ask you to be.  ’ ‘  you’ve trapped yourself so thoroughly in your own mind that it’s not even a rut anymore,  it’s a pit.   ’

[itsrabbidseason]

♡

[stardustcas]

@misha: “This weekend, fans gave me 100 blue roses–1 for each episode of supernatural i’ve worked on. (You guys really know how to make a girl blush.)”