—- There were scapegoats; and there were swines whom the righteous had chased the demons into. They wished he would run off the cliffs and self-destruct. It ANGERED him;
THE ANGER FESTERED IN HIS MOUTH & GREW FERAL TUSKS.
indie rp tousen kaname sideblog to xyuuken* 21+
written by eli * this is a sideblog so i have to follow back from main, but you are not obligated to follow ryuuken.
blog canons, somewhat organized, an unnumbered list (updated: april 21, 2021)
tousen was often overlooked/ignored pre and as a shinigami. he’s unassuming and seemingly by the mold. that’s what allowed him to stay under the radar for so long, even though he’s not a prolific liar like aizen or gin. he lied by omission, and very rarely got asked follow-up questions.
he low key doesn’t think his opinions matter, because they’re so chronically ignored/disregarded. it’s in both explicit and subtle ways. his will and wishes being ignored by the central 46 when it came to tokinada was obvious. but also subtly in his professional and personal life. while he was a captain and an editor to the official publication of seireitie, it would seem like his opinions were frequently devalued just from the way he instinctively frames them. like it’s never enough just because “kaname doesn’t like this” or “tousen thinks this is wrong/is not comfortable with this.” he has to frame it as something else, something of “greater good” or higher logic/principles to be taken seriously. and for the most part he has coped with that pretty well. except when he confronts people he genuinely cares about, ie. komamura, hisagi. he also ended up hollowfying. because why does it matter if he gave up his heart? it already didn’t matter.
he’s sex repulsed. he was only ever “touched” by one person and that person* did not value him as much as he thought they did. and he has been in denial about it ever since, framing his repulsion as him saving himself still for that person. this self delusion is coming apart more postwar than ever before, but confronting it is still a painful thing. *i’m not pinning down who the person is, so it can be verse dependent.
he limited himself with the path he chose re aizen, convincing himself to be so strictly black and white when he is naturally fluid. he lied to himself a lot, putting up walls that boxed himself in. there were people he otherwise would’ve been close to that he kept at arms length because of this.
using more tactile and verbal communication with him is not a favor to him but a favor to yourself to get the most out of the interaction. he will be fine if someone doesn’t give him a clear “word picture,” and/or use touch to communicate; he navigates the world without them most of the time. but one’s experience with him is 100% better if they learn those techniques and allow him to exercise the full range of how he relates to the world.
nature is, in fact, kind of unnerving to him*. it’s unpredictable and full of irregularities and unfamiliar sudden sounds and movements. still he hides his anxiety well and is fiercely independent, and will only reveal his discomfort to a select few extremely close to him. *this is no longer true in postwar verse where he lives in the outskirt of rukongai close to the woods and cultivates his own garden, living off the land.
he uses a combination of echolocation and reiatsu detection to navigate. he’s been doing this since a very young age since before he became a shinigami and developed even greater mastery of it.
his reiatsu feels like a body of water that ripples. the ripple serves the purpose of imaging, bouncing back to him with information about his surroundings and the shape and mass of objects. it’s a second nature at this point and most people don’t notice it’s happening. but it’s not impossible to evade his detection. those who are adept to masking their presence, like komamura, can “go with/along the grooves” of his reiatsu and become invisible that way. at least when he’s not trying to find them.
he keeps his reiatsu spread out so it reads like a low pressure and does not give out an overwhelming presence (neither uryuu or renji noticed his approaching until he was right in front of them).
when he “pulls back” the reiryoku and concentrates it, his reiatus makes people feel like they’ve sunken -- like they’ve missed a step or slipped into a pool of water deeper than they thought. think: water on the floor vs. water in a tall glass.
postwar hc
the hollowfication did alter the quality of his reiatsu. it’s more ... hollow-esque. but i haven’t delved too deep into what that means. stay tuned.
the wound from hisgai’s kazashini left a permanent scar. it’s under his chin where it connects with the neck. the scar is a lighter color than his otherwise undamaged/healed skin, and often covered with a scarf.
the injury busted his larynx, which was a bitch to heal even with hollow regeneration ability. sometimes it acts up in response to weather, or more often, heightened emotions and causes his voice to crack or fry.
he still has his hollow hole. it’s squarely in the middle of his chest. he covers it up at all times when there’s a possibility that someone will lay eyes on him.
he gains further mastery of his reiryoku/reiatsu and is able to spread it out even wider, covering a large area of the rukongai district where he resides. he uses this as an alarm system and “keep watch” of the area as a de facto guardian of the district.
the walls he built before came crumbling down after the winter war. he’s had to rebuild and address finally various traumas and hung ups in ways other than making them ammunition to blow up the world and himself with. it’s a tedious process and he often comes apart like a rope unraveled. but he’s also much freer a person than he ever was.
Kenpachi returns the smile, more prominent and full of teeth than the subtle rise of the lip that Kaname has. Mostly because it's bolstered by the idea of food.
"think i could help out? or, at least, watch? 'cause when you do stuff like that... i'unno, it's relaxin' but it also holds my attention, y'know?"
he could hear the smile in kenpachi's voice, the way his lips pull against teeth. it brought a warmth to kaname's own. he turns to run his hand across the counter for a few other instruments and ingredients, including a bag of flour and white beans.
‘I could certainly use your help. The dessert is served best with color. Besides fish, I also plan on making some in the shape of flowers and fruit... I would need your help to decide the best color for them.’ he pauses and chuckles. ‘And perhaps Yachiru would like to supervise.’
He takes the wooden item from Kaname's outstretched hands, turning it over. The only mold he's ever heard of is that green stuff that grows on bad bread, but maybe this is a different one. The purpose of the implement isn't obvious to him, but Kenpachi does answer the question.
"yeah, the inside looks like a fish... like a fish if you squished it flat, in that hollow space."
‘Does it? Good.’ when kenpachi takes over the mold, their fingers briefly touch and kaname smiles at the sensation of it.
‘I got it from one of the townspeople. I want to make something with it... mochi or wagashi to go with tea.’ he muses with a hand on his chin, thinking through the different ways he could utilize the fish mold.
‘How much more do you have to lose? How many dead, lost, or broken, before you would realize the unsustainability of your system?’ his words drip with venom, unsheathed sword by his side. he flicks his wrist, and cut the snared hare free from its trap. the former shinigami picks up the catch, holding the animal by its hind legs.
‘I suppose you're not going to attempt to arrest me? Or are you simply shocked into inaction? You should listen to that instinct. We don't need shinigami here.’ _____ @lieu10nant
‘Captain Hirako.’ he notes the incoming presence of the other shinigami before the captain turns the corner. the fifth seat pulls up the half mask hanging by his neck before the man's arrival and re-covers the bottom of his face.
he stands in front of bushels of flowers. as wind blows by, the breeze picks up fragrance and the scent of freshly cut stems, tussling his hair and his coattail imprinted with the bold calligraphy letters: MUGURUMA COMMANDO UNIT.
kaname turns and bows to the superior officer. ‘Good day, Captain. Are you heading to the Ninth Division? Captain Muguruma and Lieutenant Kuna are out on a special mission. They are due to return this eve.’ _____ @gyakusama
‘It's a mold.’ he runs his fingers through the indent of the wooden instrument. it looked like a block of wood at first glance, well oiled and sanded. but there is an impression in the middle. circular with ridges and indents creating a pattern.
‘It's supposed to be a fish.’ kaname announces, removing his hand and holding out the mold for kenpachi to examine. ‘Does it look like a fish?’ _____ @kenpxchi
‘...You were too loud, Gin. Your yelling betrayed your position. If your goal was to ambush, that is. If it was for another purpose, such as alerting one of your presence, or... celebration...’ he reached out and placed his hand on gin's head. ‘Then well done.’ _____ @godkilller
