melancholic koala

probably crying in the corner with a book in my hand

[nonfictionalgay]

Once in a while I open those chats again and look back at what I lost. How did we end up here ? From laughing about being grandmas together to not even knowing each other's existence.

[nonfictionalgay]

college life

its been unnecessarily good dk how and what I did to deserve all of this love ❤ came out to two of my major friends (one of whom I might have a crush on) and they reacted in such a good way and aren't homophobic. Felt ugly and missed my friends so cried for them.... Hostel is chaotic and I don't feel emotions anymore. Heteronormativity sucks cause why out of no where I feel said that no guys like me😭(I don't even like them) . I miss home (friends) wanna hug them all so much. Missing people is worse than missing a place. Some people left and some people entering my life hope they are as equally as the ones who left🤍

[nonfictionalgay]

Starting college pretty soon so this might become my anonymous ranting place...... Let's hope the journey is most of happy ranting than annoyes one

[your-villainous-neighbour]

so anyway

[nonfictionalgay]

Everytime I go on insta I feel like it won't be that and then I see comments under a random post and it's filled with hateful comments. What's up with people and being a petty little bitch about everything. Like dude stfu it's not that big of a deal.

[nonfictionalgay]

am i considered a masochist after willingly drinking coffee knowing full well it makes me anxious

[nonfictionalgay]

the weird urge to open tumblr and stalk myself after every 100 days.

[nonfictionalgay]

Empty

Missing someone who doesn't exist

Feeling nostalgia in memories I never made

Craving the comfort of someone who I never met

Missing the smile which made me dream

Wanting to rest my head on the shoulder which felt like was moulded for my head but will I ever find the shoulder

Will I ever hold the hand which is the final piece of me

The touch which I crave is unknown to me but all I can do Is feel it in my head

[nonfictionalgay]

I say I love my bodies, do I? When I look in the mirror there is always one improvement I think I could have in the back of my mind. Every person wishes to be someone else. Some people might say my body is perfect but to me all of your body is perfect. A skinny person wants to look fat, a fat person wants to look skinny. What exactly is perfect for the definition of bodies? People with small boobs want big boobs and people with big boobs want small boobs, some with curly hair fancy straight hair but people with straight hair always wish they had some curls. Will we ever be satisfied with our bodies? Will there be a day when I will look in the mirror and not find any insecurity. Will I be able to checklist all the "perfect features" of my body? I wait for the day when my every insecurity turns into the best part of me when I look in the mirror. But for now, all I wanna do is throw a stone in a mirror so that I can't look at myself anymore and feel ashamed that I criticize the very thing keeping my life.

-eurus

[thisismetryingtobeadramaticpoet]

I just need one day with my books,food,netflix,scented candles, an ink pen and a diary,music and myself alone to get my shit together or else I'm dropping everything and running to a house beside a lake with all of those things istg