treat me really niceys

place for you to send comments about my work, hosted on neocities. main is firstaidspray, oc blog is makarovni. no unsolicited constructive criticism.

[nonia]

🩷 Masterlist 🩷

List of all current published fics and close-to-finished WIPs, will be updated as I upload more. ‼️ Means explicit content. All oc/canon unless stated otherwise.

Gary Cole Cinematic Universe

🏁Talladega Nights (Nonia Fonzarelli/Reese Bobby)🏁

Got You Where I Want You (ongoing) ‼️

Coming In First, As Usual (oneshot) ‼️

📁Office Space (Nonia Fonzarelli/Bill Lumbergh)📁

Just Great (oneshot) ‼️

📕Veep📕

We've Got Tonight - Nonia Fonzarelli/Kent Davison (two parts) (editing)

🌿Pineapple Express🌿

Why I'm Here - Nonia Fonzarelli/Ted Jones (ongoing) (WIP) ‼️

Kieferverse

🏜Desert Saints (Juliette Chrysler/Arthur Banks)🏜

Interstate Love Song (ongoing) ‼️

Better Call Saul

Tell Me Where It Hurts - Domingo/Solana (oneshot)

Midnight Confession - Domingo/Solana (prompt, oneshot)

Peaches - Domingo/Solana (prompt, oneshot)

Dirty Little Thing - Lalo/Angelina (ongoing) (WIP) ‼️

Sunday Sunshine - Domingo/Solana (oneshot) (WIP)

Dance and Dense Denso - Domingo/Solana (oneshot) (Editing)

Far Cry 3

My Reason for Reason - Vaas/Mari (ongoing) ‼️

Red Dead Redemption 2

Mexican Moon - Javier/Bonita (ongoing) ‼️

House MD

Birthday Countdown Revchase Snippets (done)

Heaven Tonight - Reverie/Chase (oneshot) (WIP)

Alan Wake

Love Psalm - Lilith/Mr Scratch (oneshot) (editing)‼️ Zero - Navy/Tim (ongoing) (WIP)‼️ Last Kiss - Lilith/Mr Scratch (oneshot) (WIP)‼️ Say You'll Haunt Me - Lilith and Alan (oneshot) (WIP)

Dollars Trilogy

Il Buono e La Bella - Blondie/Gloria (ongoing) (WIP)‼️

RESIDENT EVIL

Make Up Your Mind - Cali Ortega/Lucas Baker (ongoing) ‼️

CHAINSAW MAN

Something Like Human - Gehenna/Kishibe (ongoing) (WIP) ‼️

I'll Bleed You Dry Now - Akane Sawatari/Katana Man (WIP) ‼️

[firstaidspray]

Make Up Your Mind - Chapter 1

READ HERE!!!

Summary: Several months of meticulous planning and a stint as an undercover Blue Umbrella field scientist lands Dr Cali Ortega the opportunity she's been waiting for– an in with Lucas Baker and the Connections. When her Blue Umbrella unit is ambushed and kidnapped by Lucas, he puts Cali through her own tests. Through this, Cali and Lucas discover their true feelings for one another, and that maybe leaving the Connections behind in favor of a more “normal” life is what they truly need.

Chapter Summary: During Operation Lurking Fear, an undercover Cali Ortega is captured by Lucas Baker, her ideal collaborator, and forced to take part in trials to prove her worth as a potential partner. However, despite the pain he puts her through, Lucas earns a soft spot in her heart, and she in his. The plan is now something more along the lines of “survive, make sure Chris Redfield doesn't get us, then go get Whataburger.”

Rating: Mature

Media: Resident Evil 7

Pairing: Lucas Baker/Cali Ortega (OC)

Word Count: ~12.3k

CW: Violence, death, kidnapping, torture, needles, suggestive situations (nothing graphic), vomit mention, cannibalism mention

[nonia]

Summary: Several months of meticulous planning and a stint as an undercover Blue Umbrella field scientist lands Dr Cali Ortega the opportunity she's been waiting for– an in with Lucas Baker and the Connections. When her Blue Umbrella unit is ambushed and kidnapped by Lucas, he puts Cali through her own tests. Through this, Cali and Lucas discover their true feelings for one another, and that maybe leaving the Connections behind in favor of a more “normal” life is what they truly need.

Chapters

Chapter One Chapter Two (WIP)

[firstaidspray]

Reason for Reason - Chapter One

Read Here

Media: Far Cry 3

Rating: Explicit, 18+

Word Count: ~11.5k

Pairing: Vaas Montenegro/Mari Galvez (OC)

Summary: After being forced to kill her fiance when the two trespass on Rook Islands, Mari Gálvez is welcomed with open arms by Vaas Montenegro, leader of the Pirates, a faction on the islands. Mari discovers that Vaas has more in store for her than just a job as the Pirates' head medic, and that life on Rook Islands with Vaas is a lot more interesting than she initially thought it would be.

Chapter Summary: Mari Gálvez and her fiance arrive on Rook Islands– though not by Mari's choice– and after being found by Vaas and his Pirates, Mari is tasked with killing her fiance in order to live. After this, Vaas tests her loyalty to him and she passes, making her an official member of the Pirates. After a hunting trip to prove her skills, Vaas and Mari find themselves feeling a bit more than just loyalty towards one another.

CW Under the cut

CW: Canon typical violence, murder, brief suicide mention (mentioned once, not described), emotional abuse mention (briefly discussed), blood, animal death, mild gore, Not SFW mentions, heavily Not SFW situations and dialogue (no sex though), biting

[nonia]

Summary: After being forced to kill her fiance when the two trespass on Rook Islands, Mari Gálvez is welcomed with open arms by Vaas Montenegro, leader of the Pirates, a faction on the islands. Mari discovers that Vaas has more in store for her than just a job as the Pirates' head medic, and that life on Rook Islands with Vaas is a lot more interesting than she initially thought it would be.

Chapters

Chapter One ‼️

Chapter Two (WIP) ‼️

[firstaidspray]

Tell Me Where It Hurts - Oneshot

Read Here

Summary: After Domingo's unexpected altercation with Nacho, Solana takes extra good care of him. Entirely hurt/comfort, nothing more.

Rating: Mature

Media: Better Call Saul

Pairing: Domingo “Krazy-8” Molina/Solana Salazar (oc)

Word Count: ~6k

CW: Medical, injuries, mention of physical violence, mention of blood, suggestive dialogue and situation (but no actual explicit stuff), prescription drug usage (both proper use and abuse)

[nonia]

Summary: A deadbeat dad loser and a nihilistic, self-loathing gas station employee fall in love...because of a car.

Rating: Mature to Explicit, 18+

Media: Talladega Nights

Pairing: Reese Bobby/Nonia Fonzarelli (oc)

Chapters:

Chapter 1 - Closing Time

Chapter 2 - Atlanta ‼️

Chapter 3 - Little Miss Can't Be Wrong (WIP) ‼️

[nonia]

Summary: The story of Juliette Chrysler and Arthur Banks, aka how one super sweet girl manages to become infatuated with a total asshole over the course of a single day.

Rating: Explicit, 18+

Media: Desert Saints

Pairing: Arthur Banks/Juliette Chrysler (oc)

Chapters:

Chapter 1 - Use Once and Destroy ‼️

Chapter 2 - She's Got Issues (WIP) ‼️

[nonia]

Summary: To celebrate Valentine’s month as well as my birthday month in 2024, I posted a snippet of Revchase every day until my birthday, using these prompts- there were 25 so it led right up to my birthday!!

Rating: T to Mature

Media: House MD

Pairing: Robert Chase/Reverie (oc)

Chapters

Day 1

Day 2

Day 3

Day 4

Day 5

Day 6

Day 7

Day 8

Day 9

Day 10

Day 11

Day 12

Day 13+14

Day 15

Day 16

Day 17

Day 18

Day 19

Day 20

Day 21

Day 22

Day 23

Day 24

Day 25

[firstaidspray]

Interstate Love Song Ch. 1 - Use Once and Destroy

Media: Desert Saints

Pairing: Arthur Banks/Juliette Chrysler (original character)

Rating: Explicit, 18+ ONLY

Word Count: ~14k

Time to do something incredibly ambitious and post a finished piece of writing for once!! Chapter one of the story of Juliette Chrysler and Arthur Banks (Desert Saints), aka how one super sweet girl manages to become infatuated with a total asshole over the course of a single day.

Find the soundtrack here!!

Content warnings under the cut.

CW: Graphic description of violence, murder, mentioned/implied sexual assault, graphic description of blood, guns/gun violence, knives, smoking, alcohol, medical talk, dom/sub dynamics, NSFW including: dom/sub, PIV penetration, restraint, biting, exhibitionism/public sex acts, choking, degradation, praise, spanking, description of genitalia, description of body image

[makarovni]

Coming In First, As Usual

Read Here!!

Rating: Explicit, 18+

Media: Talladega Nights

Pairing: Reese Bobby/Nonia Fonzarelli (OC)

Word Count: ~3k

Summary: After her first victory at an out of town race, Nonia and Reese celebrate at the ridiculously expensive hotel they're staying at. NSFW oneshot with zero plot.

CW: Brief mention of car crash (non descriptive), alcohol, mild discussion of body dysmorphia, NSFW: PiV sex, cunnilingus, blowjobs, hot tub sex, biting, creampie

(I guess I'll share this. Wrote it a while ago then touched it up recently, and as I just watched Talladega Nights I'm feeling feral over Reese and therefore also Reese/Nonia so I took one last look over it and am gonna share. It ain't great but it's something.)

[firstaidspray]

Just Great (One Shot)

Read it here!!

Rating: Explicit / 18+ ONLY

Media: Office Space

Pairing: Bill Lumbergh/Nonia Fonzarelli (my self insert oc)

Word Count: ~3k

Soooo I decided to actually write this idea that was bouncing around in my head with some encouragement from @confidentandgood !! A silly, stupid little story about Nonia and Bill fucking, with exact and accurate dialogue from the movie scene where Peter has a nightmare about Lumbergh having sex (the header shows part of that scene. Don't ask why I already had that saved). Also, to truly get this story, you're gonna need to watch the scene if you haven't seen it. Otherwise it won't make sense.

And remember- it's meant to be silly and goofy and inspired by that scene!! It's not intended to be serious or "hot" or whatever. NSFW content tags under the cut.

NSFW Content: PiV, hair pulling, biting, kissing during sex, praising (kinda???)

[nonia]

Ignore the first link. Read it here.

[firstaidspray]

Got You Where I Want You Chapter 2 - Atlanta

Rating: Explicit, 18+

Media: Talladega Nights

Pairing: Reese Bobby/Nonia Fonzarelli (OC)

Word Count: ~10k

CW: Alcohol, smoking, physical fighting, injury, car crash mention, NSFW (NSFW tags under the cut)

🏁 READ HERE 🏁

Summary: A deadbeat dad loser and a nihilistic, self-loathing gas station employee fall in love...because of a car.

Chapter Summary: At a Talladega 500 viewing party at work, Nonia gets into an altercation because she can't grapple with her feelings for Reese. To her surprise, a couple of days later, she has to confront them head on, as Reese asks her on a date. Ricky also makes a surprise appearance in her life, in a way she doesn't expect.

(YES FINALLY, chapter two of my Reese and Nonia bullshit is done!! This chapter is really fun imo, I hope you guys like it!)

NSFW tags:

PiV, unprotected sex, creampie, heavy petting, biting. Pretty mild stuff for now.

[firstaidspray]

Got You Where I Want You Chapter 1 - Closing Time

Read it here!!

Rating: Mature

Media: Talladega Nights

Pairing: Reese Bobby/Nonia Fonzarelli (self insert OC)

Word Count: ~10k

Content Warnings: Alcohol

Playlist for Reese/Nonia!!

Summary: A deadbeat dad loser and a nihilistic, self-loathing gas station employee fall in love...because of a car.

Chapter Summary: After a fun night with a hot older man named Reese and his 1969 Chevrolet Chevelle, Nonia feels like she's finally feeling something other than the usual numbness- happiness and, possibly, love. Naturally, this causes an emotional crisis, and Nonia can't get Reese out of her head.

(That's right, I'm finally ready to release this, something I'd been working on and off for almost 2 years: Got You Where I Want You, the story of how my self insert OC Nonia and Reese Bobby meet and become your new least favorite degenerate power couple. This first chapter is mostly about Nonia, and doesn't feature anything NSFW or triggering content, but future chapters probably will and be rated explicit.)

[firstaidspray]

Now available as a simple text page on my neocities, where I will be posting all of my future work (and reposting old work)!! Click the link to read it there!!