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Persephone, my darling, I picked flowers for you. Their petals, they shall fade but I will be here too.

Persephone, my love, I wrote this ode to you. Let this sweet verse heal all the wrong I do.

Persephone, my only, I'll play this song for you. Your walls, they are too strong, but music can push through.

Persephone, my everything, I pulled the sun for you. Let the light fill you up in ways I never knew.

Persephone, my beauty, I'll watch the skies for you. Every cloud or shooting star, you will feel it too.

Persephone, my saviour, I'll leave this place for you. For when I need to make you happy, I haven't got a clue.

- A.G.M

#a.g.m

ODE TO THE UNSUNG SONGS I QUEUED UP AT THE KARAOKE BAR

Dead years before I was born

Or born years before I was alive

Their songs will ring out tonight

To empty ears and drunken patrons

Each melody they wrote will be whispered into the night

I hope the staff don't skip it

I hope someone else will pick up the microphone

Eager and willing to revive something long gone

Something so old it is written in our DNA

And Carrie Underwood will ring out along Russel Street

And somewhere, God is listening

And He will know I lived tonight

And He will know we all tried to be happy,

Not pure or sacred or virtuous,

But happy. Maybe that will be enough

#poetry #prose #i dont know how i used to write so many tags. i dont know how i found the words without shame. but she remembers

I have written with stolen lipstick on bathroom walls

I've taken the pills

I've done my time in class and court and other peopes beds

I'm ready for a love that keeps me out at night and in bed on sunday mornings

I wile and I toil trying to make something beautiful

And every weekend a much older man tells me I am beautiful

Meaning it as much as I mean that I brushed my teeth last night

Meaning it less than I mean I love the woman I met in the bathroom tonight

I have done my time. I'm ready for a love that stops me writing on the walls of every stall in every club I hate or love

Maybe its hubris or maybe its my age

But dear god I hope I'm ready

#poetry #love #prose

Bleach your hair. Let the chemicals seep into your brain. Maybe it will help you.

Maybe you won't think so much.

Smoke a cigarette. Smoke fake flavoured air. Think about having a stroke and let the chemicals seep into your lungs.

Watch your idols grow old. Watch them wrinkle and wither and laugh at them the way you laughed at your parents.

Keep thinking you're going to be a millionaire. A god. A rockstar.

Keep watching the movie that tells you to break out of the box. Repeat the lines. Learn the monologues so that you can pretend they are your own.

- written 29 June 2022

#poetry

I wish you were here, because I have been here.

I recognise it,

Something inside you. That has been inside me, for longer than I remember.

I love you. But there is a bigger word for it.

What I feel is more than love.

I will recognise you in every lifetime.

I promise. And I hope that you will find me too.

#poetry

I have something to say to you. But I won't use my words. Fickle, ugly, slurred through smoke and lies. Words will fail me.

I know my lips appear more full when my mouth is open.

So I will wait by your window, throat to the sun,

I will wait for you to notice me.

#poetry

And here's the scene you've been waiting for.

The teenagers in the car. (You know it better than I do.)

They're larger than life. Shadowed bodies cast across a screen big enough to make you forget it's there.

We drove through every silent street. Looking at the empty houses with the lights on. Pretending we weren't driving and pretending you were going to stay.

The scratchy radio felt heavier than silence. You smelt like peppermint and I hate myself for remembering that still.

I watched the street lamps pass us by and lied to you again and again. I watched the flowers I picked for you die.

And I realised that pain doesn't just exist in the mind. It sticks to clothes like cigarette smoke. It hides in shadows and the records left gathering dust. Pain exists as long as I remember you clearly.

#a.g.m

"I'm here for you"

These cuts are not from thorns

You're halfway out the door

I haven't slept all week

There's ash stuck to my teeth

And I don't know what I need

I'm not yet done stalling

The artificial leaves are falling

I flinch when the wind blows

I'm the only one who knows

And I don't know what I need

#a.g.m #poetry #prose poetry

I wrote myself a lover who sings me to sleep and wipes my tears away.

In my mind, my lover's voice is soft and sweet. Nothing like my own, too harsh and always too loud.

My lover sounds like church bells. I imagine her hands would feel like a saint's.

I made myself a lover who cannot leave me. When I sculpted her from clay it was not by chance that I did not give her legs.

I made myself a lover who truly loves me. That alone is proof she could never be real.

#a.g.m

Stretch.

Do you feel those muscles move under your skin? Baby, that's god.

Drink.

What are you when you are not thirsty? You were born with empty hands and you will die that way.

Look.

The sunset bleeds across the sky. Baby, it's the same sun every day. She is not dying she is resting.

#a.g.m

A moment: you shouldn't dig tunnels in sand dunes because they could collapse at any moment and i think she said that's a where she hid her secrets

A moment: her leg brushed against mine on the train and if you think about breathing you start to suffocate

A moment: the lights from the petrol station cast shapes that look like stars on her face and theres a reason astronauts dont come back sometimes

A moment: we sat in the rain and she told me that love isnt real at our age and did you know mount everest was still the tallest mountain before it was discovered

A moment: at the highest point on this earth i looked at the whole world below me and felt infinite. she once said galaxies arent meant to be explored

A moment: i sat on her bed for the last time and she looked at me like i was a birds nest in a hurricane

A moment: there are more ways to shuffle a deck of cards than there are atoms on earth and she always leaves the joker at the top of the deck

A moment: i told her i miss her and if you hear noises coming from the forest you shouldnt run into the woods. i told her i miss her and i never stopped waiting for a reply.

#a.g.m

In the desert

I lie in the sand under a night sky. There are no stars above.

Dreaming.

I rise and reach up to touch the air.

Waking.

There is heat in this earth to remind me what it feels like to be alone.

Searching.

I fall to my knees and bury my hands. Nothing waits in the distance.

Sleeping.

They will find me and name me but I will still only ever belong to you.

- A.G.M

#a.g.m

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