Midnight In Lala Land

Cute animals, rants about writing, things that will make you smile, things that will make you angry at the world and swear vengeance, more cute animals to help with that, trout, okay I lied about the trout, insomnia driven reblogging of fandoms, and occasional sanity.

[aliensnipe]

What if there were women’s cleanliness products that were marketed the way Old Spice stuff is? Like they had names like “Lioness” and “Sycamore” and “Wildfire” and “Hunter’s Moon” and they were touted as making you smell like a warrior queen who does not suffer fools and conquers all she beholds

[trixie-ren-deactivated20191028]

HELLO LADIES

have you felt the primal call of the unmerciful sea calling you to strike down those who would defy you? no? well if you stopped using overpriced flower-scented body wash and switched to SEA HAG, you might. 

look down.

back up. where are you? you’re a siren, bare-breasted and shrieking as you lure the unwary to their doom on the rocks below. and you smell amazing. 

what’s in your hand? back at me. it’s a vial of skin-nourishing ingredients, derived from the seaweed you used to strangle a hated foe. it does wonders for your skin tone and resilience, and we all can agree that we will need that resilience in the coming war.

look again: the seaweed is now a formal apology from the last man who unnecessarily tried to explain something to you.

anything is possible when you smell like a vengeful sea witch and embrace your own rage. i’m on a narwhal. 

[sepulchritude]

my fav trope is like, nonhuman characters not understanding human needs/customs but still being super supportive of their human companion

“look what I found while exploring this planet’s surface!” “kilrak please I’m trying to sleep” “ah yes your human circadian rhythm. *stage whispering* I am supposed to be quiet during this time in your rhythm, yes?”

“the book I purchased on ragnok V says humans require physical touch when upset. therefore, I shall engage in a ‘hug’ with you.” *supremely awkward five-armed hug ensues*

*human sneezes* “OH MY GOD SIL'EEN GET THE MEDIC OUR HUMAN IS DYING”

“this pamphlet I received recently says that humans require companions and packmates in the form of small earth creatures. you should have told me this before we departed earth, but it is no worry. we will have to stop at the next trade planet to get you one of these ‘cats’ or ‘dogs’.”

[agentquinn]

imagine the aliens really purchasing a kitten for one of their rough and world-weary scifi badass human companions and watching in helpless wonderment what ensues 

“she’s been cuddling that small animal for the past fifteen minutes just going ‘kitty, kitty’. did we - did we break our human?”

a more seasoned alien puts one of their tentacles around the younger one as the rest of the team gathers to watch their human make kissy noises. 

“no, kilrak,” the alien says. “we did good.” 

[frowningfox]

“Human-Steve! I have heard that today is the anniversary of your hatching! According to my human culture pamphlet, it is customary to set a sugary pastry on fire while chanting your species’ growth incantation and presenting sacrifices wrapped in shiny paper. I am afraid to ask, in case this ritual is sacred and this request therefor insensitive… but may I be allowed to participate? It sounds much more fascinating than molting.”

[anexperimentallife]

“Human Steve, I have read about your ritual dance called ‘The Hokey Pokey,’ performed mostly at mate-bonding celebrations after the guests reach an elevated level of intoxication. But Human Steve, how do I know WHICH left foot to put in, put out, and shake all about? I do not… Human Steve, why are you laughing?”

[captainarwenpond221b-deactivate]

“Human-Steve, you are… you are eating, but it is not one of your ritual fueling times. Are you dying? Is everything alright? Have you not been receiving enough sustenance? Do I need to get you better things to eat? Human-Steve, why are you trying to hide that food?”

[rinneavicula]

“Human-Steve, my research has informed me of a grave oversight in your care that I, as your companion, have made! Thus, I have gathered collections of fictional human literature to read aloud at the time of your bed. Which is more to your liking: “The Care and Keeping of Cacti” or “1001 Crossword Puzzles?” Human-Steve? Human-Steve, I am serious.“

[hongbubs]

One of the things I love the most about this post is how “Human-Steve” makes me think that there is also an alien called Steve in the squad, and I just imagine the first meeting and introduction where there is the human guy introducing himself as Steve and then there is this huge blue guy with like 5 legs and bug eyes and apparently Steve is like a completely regular name on his planet too in some intergalactical coincidence

that was off topic sorry.

[aethersea]

that was the best possible tangent, thank you for this addition

[notesfromgirlx]

Now I kind of want a buddy cop movie about intergalactic police forces trying to integrate  a new human member and trying really hard to be welcoming and supportive.  

[thesnadger]

Concept: That scene in every 90s high school movie where someone shows the new kid around the cafeteria (”that table is the nerds, those are the jocks, the goths, the cheerleeders” etc) except it’s a medieval tavern and each table has a different d&d class.

[hungrylikethewolfie]

Those are the arcane casters. They all sit together, but the wizards think the sorcerers are undisciplined cheaters and the sorcerers think the wizards are pretentious dicks. You don’t wanna get in the middle of that–the last person who tried got polymorphed into a toad. I guess he had a lot of debts he was looking to get out of, though, so he just rolled with it. He’s somebody’s familiar now, I think.

The bards used to sit with them, but they broke off a while ago to do their own thing. Look, I should tell you right now: you’re poetically gonna sleep with at least one of them. It’s happened to most of us, so don’t be embarrassed. If you’re lucky, you might get away with just a ballad to your beauty parodying an 80s rock hit.

The paladins are at the next table over. Religious freaks, but if you’re getting bullied they’ll have your back even if they don’t know you. You, uh…you might end up sleeping with some of them, too. Look, they’re really good listeners, okay? Whatever.

The druids. Don’t even THINK of trying to sit with them unless you’re rocking a negative carbon footprint. Or if you can turn into a bear or a slow loris or something, they love that shit.

The rogues are…they’re around here somewhere.

[shortvideosandstuff]

Cop catches teens smoking pot

[notesfromgirlx]

This actually reminds me of why fish swimming in a school is helpful to their survival. When a predator comes and they react the sheer volume of possible targets confuses the predator as they attempt to pursue multiple target. Unlike what you might think, that a larger target pool increases the likelyhood of a predator catching one “fish” a large enough number will actually increase the chances that every “fish” escapes. If you look at the clip you can actually see the cop wavering between possible targets until they’ve all gotten a fair sized head start. 

So. Remember kids. Be good. Work with others. Share. and stay in school. 

[styro-sometimes]

[ka-te-fe-ar-deactivated20180905]

And before anyone makes any 4/20 weed comments, the date is the anniversary of the Columbine massacre. 

[jazzybot4]

Damn straight. Fuck, I’ll host GED classes in the damn library if it keeps kids safe. I’ll share what skill with words I have, what life experience I have, and make sure that the kids in my community come home safe and stay that way. Remember kids: Student walk-outs and sit-in protests are incredibly effective, because it means that the system is breaking down. Their authority only goes as far as you let it. Don’t bring weapons to protests. Don’t bring mace or tear gas to protests. Get bottled water, at least six bottles per person for four hours. Pack a first aid kit. Ace bandages, band-aids, water, dried gatorade (a scoop in a bottle of water helps prevent heat stroke due to dehydration), and sunscreen. Keep emergency contacts on all cell phones, and if possible appoint someone in the group to be the designated emergency contact caller. Their job, if shit goes south, is to run to safety and call parents, call friends, call help, not just the police. Don’t be afraid of Juvie. Your record is expunged at 18, if the crime isn’t something like murder.

[hopesterling]

Protest. March. Rise up.

There is no way that it is normal to fear being shot and killed or injured or maimed in school. No way, whatsoever.

[patrickat]

Expand this to teachers. Expand this to parents. Expand this to everyone who gives a damn about lives mattering more than guns.

[norwegianalien]

If Hugh Jackman can deadlift 405 pounds, he shouldn’t have settled merely for Marius. He could’ve picked up Enjolras as well. You know what, add Eponine. Street gamines can’t possibly weigh that much. Man let’s just add the whole of Les Amis (including Gavroche). It’s Hugh Jackman. He can take it. 

[tinystarlitdwarf]

#valjean just picks up the whole barricade and leaves

[boo-cool-robot]

“yes my child I forgot what your booby of a young man looks like so please pick one from the pile”

*tries to subtly tilt the more sensible looking ones towards cosette* 

[thevalvertwhisperer]

#but imagine him trying really hard to get her to choose combeferre

“Look, Cosette, this one is practicing medicine! And he seems to have an extensive reserve of facts on things from moths to space!”

“Papa, I think that is Marius beneath him.”

“No it isn’t. But look at this Combeferre, his glasses truly frame his face.”

“Papa-”

“Cosette. P L E A S E.”

[gay-jesus-probably]

The best part about this is that Valjean has no idea who his daughters dating, but damn it he knows it’s one of them, so he just takes everyone. The young doctor? Coming. The drunk one? Hopefully not, but bring him anyways. The small child? Might be the brother of whoever Cosette’s with, better bring him just in case. This young woman? Well, Cosette’s already proven she doesn’t tell Valjean everything, so she’s coming too.

And then the final confrontation between him and Javert. Valjean comes staggering out of the sewers holding a pile of people.

“IT’S YOU JAVERT, I KNEW YOU WOULDN’T WAIT TOO LONG!”

“Valjean, what the fuck-”

“THE FAITHFUL SERVANT AT HIS POST ONCE MORE!”

“How are you balancing all of them.”

“THIS BOY AND THIS BOY AND THIS BOY AND THIS BOY AND THIS BOY AND THIS BOY AND THIS BOY AND THIS GIRL AND THIS BOY AND THIS BOY AND THIS CHILD HAVE DONE NO WRONG, AND THE NEED A DOCTORS CARE!”

“I’m not dealing with this, just go.”

“COME, TIME IS RUNNING SHORT!”

“I said you can leave!”

“LOOK DOWN, JAVERT, THEY’RE ALL STANDING IN THEIR GRAVES! MAKE WAY, JAVERT, THERE’S ABOUT A DOZEN LIVES TO SAVE!”

“TAKE THEM VALJEAN.”

[fahrenheit45done]

Javert doesn’t even kill himself, he just goes home and has a lie down, convinced the whole ordeal has been a bizarre fever dream

[virgoos]

family member: why do you even care so much about gay rights??

gay person about to invent being an ally: oh? You haven’t heard?

[notesfromgirlx]

So this one time my father picked me up from a GSA (Gay-Straight Alliance) meeting after high school. I was the vice president of our GSA. I was helping to organize a bake sale. I was telling my dad about this. My dad got really quiet and I could see the gears turning... so I mentioned my gay best friend and could see him go “is my daughter a....... good supportive friend? Yes. Yes. She is a good supportive friend. This is good. I have a good daughter. Who I raised to support her friends and people who needed help. Yes. Good. Good talk.” 

[debrides]

I worked with toddlers and pre schoolers for three years. Sometimes I accidentally slip and tell a friend to say bye to an inanimate object (“say bye bus!”) & occasionally they unthinkingly just do it.

[lesbirdan]

I’m glad there’s a teacher version of “accidentally called teacher ‘mom’”

[hermionegranger]

when I worked at Medieval Times occasionally I would slip in real life and call people “my lord”

[mugsandpugs1-deactivated2019010]

One time during family prayer, dad began: “our father who art in heaven, American Airlines, how can I help you?”

[thomrainierskies]

One time my dad went to the White Castle drive-thru and the lady (who was supposed to say ‘Welcome to White Castle, what’s your crave?’) asked, “Welcome to White Castle, what’s your problem?”

She apologized profusely while my dad proceeded to lose his shit laughing.

[mirab3lle]

Yesterday I went to Wendy’s and the girl said “Welcome to McDonalds” and then just sighed

[icouldwritebooks]

Somebody in the elevator asked me what floor I lived on, and I answered “please open your books to page eight”, and we just kind of stared at each other, blinking.

[crimeronan]

i work retail full time and my script gets frequently messy - ill ask the same question twice, or say “$2.60 is your total” while handing back their change, or say “how are you doing today?” instead of “have a good day!” like name it ive bungled it

but anyway, this lady came thru my line buying a book and the review on the front said: “few books are well written, fewer still are important, and this book manages to be both”

as i handed her the bag i was trying to say “thanks, youre all set” and instead my brain mashed up the review and i said “thanks, youre important”

there was this short pause in which i tried to figure out what the fuck id just said. she blinked and then said “oh thank you! youre important too!”

the real kicker was one of my coworkers. when i was relating this story later his response was “at least you said something NICE. last week i accidentally combined ‘youre welcome’ and ‘no problem’ into ‘youre a problem’”

[agrestenoir]

one time, since I used to work as a daycare teacher with preschoolers, i was on my college campus in my gym, and someone was running in the weight room and tripped over a machine and fell, and instead of offering to help, I just stared and said, “This is why we use our walking feet.” we both sat there for a while until the guy nodded and said, “yeah, okay, i should’ve done that.”

[disruptionwave]

I don’t know what’s worse: answering personal phone calls with “English Department, this is Annie” or answering work calls with “um, hello?” because both happen with equal frequency.

[bisexualmizzie]

I work in a library, and I was watching the front desk once when the phone rang, so I picked it up. I’m not usually the one at the desk (lowly student worker here) so I immediately just say, “Hello?” After a few seconds of silence, it finally occurs to me to add the name of the library I work at. 

[alexanderhamllton]

My mom works at the bank and most of the times I call her on her personal phone she says “good afternoon, this is Maria, how can i help you?” and I usually respond just as formally, always takes a second for her to notice that her phone is not the company’s phone.

[soiscrewedmycompanions]

I’d just switched security positions and answered the phone “FedEx Security”. When I noticed my co worker staring at me, and the guy on the phone said “wrong number”, I realized my mistake. I worked at BP, now.

[notesfromgirlx]

I’ve answers phones at four different offices, one of which had different company names depending on what line was ringing, all in under five years. 

I’ve never given the wrong company but when I’m tired and harried I’ll occasionally pick up the phone and just freeze as I try to remember who I’m currently working for. 

[esoteric-law89-deactivated20241]

Let me post this before it becomes an act of treason or sedition.

[mariahraemonroe]

Lmao

[frogmp3]

Here lies Asia. They are not going to be able to make it.

[skydodie]

Here lies Kay. She is a great friend.

[the-tevinter-biscuit]

Here lies Charlie. They were in a few weeks ago and the machine is happening.

[meesta-egg]

Here lies Meesta. She was a little late to the party.

[i-called-my-drone-daddy]

Here lies Flo. She was just so confused about how she is.

[clawedcosplay]

Here lies Navy. He was a good time.

[dogmoth]

Here lies Cerf. She was a cursed lady with no mercy and then she was a blessed mother

[oglostboy]

Here lies Ryan. He was just like a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy who is just like a guy.

[roachpatrol]

here lies roach. he was told that he was told to weld it up to the point of a knife.

[lonelymountainson]

Here lies Chris. He was the salient fact this reporter felt we need to know.

[notesfromgirlx]

Here lies Alex. She was not going to be leaving the house until I was going to be leaving the house and then I had to go to work. 

[valencing]

new year’s resolutions for my cat

eat right: more food from food dish, less lint from floor

get more exercise: jump for enriching dangle toy, not hide under bed till scary feathers go away

treat others with kindness: if awake before 7 am, no run at bed for flying leap to head of human even once, let alone over and over until human get up

stay positive: food coming soon. no need for scream

develop independent life skills: try eat food maybe once or twice without insist human sit on floor nearby for moral support. just try!

practice self-care: get on lap when human have full cup of coffee and about to watch the crown, not five minute before human leave for work

learn meteorology: if too cold for human to open window sixty second ago, it still too cold now. also cold outside bedroom window, bathroom window, living room window. all windows the same

[glumshoe]

the six types of gay songs

the song is explicitly about romantic love between two people of the same gender

the song does not contain explicitly gay lyrics, but is performed by a gay artist

the song is not sung by a gay artist, but the singer is of the same gender as the subject of the song and does not change the pronouns

the song is supposed to be about straight people but if you squint, the narrator is clearly in love with Jolene herself, come on

the song itself is ambiguous but the music video was extremely homoerotic

neither the lyrics nor the singer are gay but like, it’s just really catchy…

[glumshoe]

    7. nothing about the song is gay in any way, but you associate it with your crush for some reason, so it’s basically a LGBTQ anthem

[kieren-fucking-walker]

8. It’s 80’s synth pop

[kurtwagnermorelikekurtwagnerd]

9. im gay and i like it

[gwenfrankenstien]

#10. hozier wrote it channelling the irish lesbian ghost who dwells within him

[notesfromgirlx]

#11 the lyrics are not gay if you read what they’re actually supposed to be but when you listen to the song it’s *really* hard to understand the lyrics, resulting in gay interpretations.

[llleighsmith]

i told ya we’ve canceled discourse n we’ve moved on to homesteading skills

[smartmurderation]

it’s just choppin wood and harvesting vegetables and herbs from here on out

[llleighsmith]

amen!

[barbarianarchy-deactivated20200]

unironically this

[pinetreeanarchism]

[cornerof5thandvermouth]

anyone wanna trade tips on spinning yarn

[notesfromgirlx]

You can recycle old/unwanted cds to make a drop spindle 

Also spinning goes better if you can focus on something with a steady beat as it helps novice spinners figure out a rhythm to the work... and helps mildly less novice spinners not overthink the whole thing.

In a pinch you can use cardboard to make a shuttle that works decently for a beginner’s loom, but I wouldn’t suggest it for more complicated stuff. 

If you’re weaving a pattern where the threads will all be used equally double check before you start that the threads are as close to the exact same thickness as they can be or you will cry when you realize later that they weren’t. 

[schmergo]

Some witches once told me The throne was gonna hold me. I’m not the sharpest tool in the shed. They were looking kind of weird They were women but with beards And they said there’d be a crown upon my head.

See a dagger coming and it won’t stop coming Home to my wife and we murder King Duncan Didn’t make sense not to live for the crown Your cred goes up but your mind goes down.

So much to plot, so much to scheme So what’s wrong with taking the king’s seat? You’ll never know if you don’t go You’ll never shine till you kill Banquo.

Hey now, you’re a Scot star, get your kilt on, go slay Hey now, Thane of Cawdor, get the show on, this play And all the witches agree None of women born can harm thee.

[knitmeapony]

@goodbyeomelas

[notesfromgirlx]

I got literally halfway through the first line before my brain autocorrected to start singing this song correctly. 

[fckin-deactivated20171107]

I’m thinking about her

[eclipsebykimlipmp3-deactivated2]

forbidden fruit

[isaacmemes]

Why do grown ass adults want to eat Tide pods so much?

[kitswulf]

Because a ton of the visual/olfactory/textural sensory information these pods give me the match nutritionally-dense fruit. It’s got the oleic gleam of something high-fat like an avocado, but bright carotenoid-rich coloration like a berry that wants to be eaten by red-seeing primates and birds. It tends to smell sweet and slightly floral, enhancing that effect. Similarly, when you hold it, it is quite dense (denser than water), but very soft and liquid, once again reaffirming that this “fruit” has either high sugar or high fat content and almost no cellulose to it.

As a result, within me is a less-clever monkey just screaming to eat this delicious fruit in my hand about to go into the laundry, and it does in fact take willpower to tell him he’s a stupid monkey and this is a bubble of foul-tasting poison. But every time I do laundry, this fucking limbic monstrosity rises again and assures me it’s basically like a cherry but Even Better. I have legitimately debated just biting down on one in the hopes of inducing a deterrent memory to forestall this urge in the future, but that’s what my goddamn mammal-brain wants me to fucking do and I refuse to let it win.

[ciphercoyote]

Human Brain: Don’t eat the posion pod its fucking posion Monkey Brain: Eat the fruit pod its fruit Lizard Brain: The Washing Machine Is Vibrating Give It The Sex Fish Brain: Climb inside the washing machine it is safe.

[just-shower-thoughts]

It’s almost as if Hugh Hefner was projecting a force-field that protected creepy famous men, and with his death they were suddenly exposed.

[dorkaelskunkworks]

I prefer the “Carrie Fisher is doing her good work from beyond the grave” hypothesis, but hey.  You do you.

[postmodernmulticoloredcloak]

Why do you think those two phenomena are mutually exclusive

[dorkaelskunkworks]

The concept that Carrie Fisher murdered Hugh Hefner from beyond the veil  is actually pretty goddamn satisfying now that you mention it.

[ohyesgifsplease]

[tenaflyviper]

He is, however, perfectly willing to fuck with time and reality.

And also steal your infants.

[sparkafterdark-deactivated20181]

He didn’t steal anything. She literally asked him to take the baby. Don’t make him the bad guy just because she was a shitty sister.

[glumshoe]

I think you are severely misinformed as to how baby ownership works.

It was not her baby to give.

David Bowie is unquestionably the villain.

[sparkafterdark-deactivated20181]

Which do you think existed first, modern custody legislature, or the goblin king? 

The girl was entrusted by her parents with the care and custody of the child. By the laws governing the goblin king and his transactions, the girl was the current rightful owner of the child and made a deal with the king to take the child. Perhaps you’re not familiar with english folklore. Fae have rules, they’re tricksters, they can be sneaky, but they never break the rules.

[dixon-arrows-deactivated2018052]

Slammin’ it down in the Labyrinth fandom tonight, kids.

[leupagus]

What do you think existed first, the goblin king, or the desperate need to make girls into villains?

Sarah (which is the girl’s name, by the way) said something a bit mean-spirited after her father and stepmother dumped responsibility for her baby brother on her without asking her first. By the laws governing the goblin king and his transactions, the goblin king didn’t have to do shit; he’s the fucking king, and he took Toby out of pure spite, a desire to toy with her. Perhaps you’re not familiar with English folklore and its obsession with pretending women are always to blame. Fae have rules, they’re tricksters, they can be sneaky - and just because they never break the rules doesn’t mean that they’re not bad guys.

#‘just because she was a shitty sister’ #if you remember she TORE APART A KINGDOM to get her baby brother back #after knowing she could be rid of him forever #she said something mildly thoughtless and then crawled through bogs and befriended monsters #in order to bring her brother home #because she loved him and was brave and resourceful and kind #and because she did the right thing every time #so fuck you and your requirements for sainthood when it comes to girls #‘she said something kind of mean once and was punished by an all powerful figure for shits and giggles’ #but DON’T YOU DARE MAKE HIM THE BAD GUY!!!!!!!’

[glompcat]

What is incredible here is how overt the movie makes it that Jareth is NOTHING but the villain in this story

Oh sure he is 110% convinced he is a good guy, and a romantic figure and in love with her - but note even in his plea for her to stop fighting and be his queen he literally tells her that if she does so she’ll have to obey his every order and follow his every whim for all time. 

Jareth doesn’t actually give a rats ass about Sarah, if he did he wouldn’t be working so hard to make her life miserable, he is in love with the IDEA of being in love with her, and could care less about her as a person.

There is a reason Sarah is able to defeat him by telling him “Through dangers untold and hardships unnumbered, I have fought my way here to the castle beyond the Goblin City to take back the child that you have stolen. For my will is as strong as yours, and my kingdom is as great. You have no power over me.”

Jareth is looking for someone who he can terrify into following his every whim. Someone who will buy into the idea that romance is a matter of the powerful king being “kind” enough to “notice” a normal girl, and then fuck with her. However the moment Sarah asserts that they are equals, that they are in a position of mutual power and he can not rule her… Jareth loses all interest in her, because what he was looking for was not romance or following her whims, but her fear and obedience (which he literally says to her and I quote: “I ask for so little. Just fear me. Love me. Do as I ask, and I shall be your slave.” Jareth has no fucking clue what the fuck love is, he honestly believes love is a woman being terrified of a man and doing whatever he asks of her.). 

In short Labyrinth is fully and truly NOT a tale that presents a powerful supernatural man taking interest in a young human girl as romantic, instead it treats that as a horrible nightmare, but one that can be overcome by asserting your own authority and remembering that no matter what YOU are just as, if not more powerful than that glam rock fae king could ever be.

[iamthetank]

As to the point of the implicit contract made between Jareth and Sarah when she invites the Goblin King to take the baby, it does not matter whose law is older. In fact, the exact opposite is true - newer law supersedes older law. That is how laws work.  Sarah, being a minor herself, did not have the ability to enter into a legally binding contract. In addition, she did not have any authority to assign ownership of a baby, being only temporarily responsible for the child’s well-being and not authorized to subcontract that responsibility.  In addition, you have to take into account where this contract was made; specifically in the house owned by Sarah’s parents, presumably somewhere in the United States (judging by Sarah’s accent and mentions of high school drama class) where Jareth is not a figure with any governmental or legal authority. The argument may be made that by speaking words that create a passage between Sarah’s house and Jareth’s realm, that the interstitial space would act as some sort of embassy - except that the act of speaking the unenforceable and illegal contract predates the existence of any interstitial space so it is irrefutable that Jareth’s attempt to enforce any such contract has no standing in any court of law.  Ironically, Sarah’s parents cannot have a civil suit brought against Jareth, via the precedent of Mayo v. Satan and his staff (Pennsylvania, 1971) which states that service of papers could not be brought against the Devil due to inaccessibility. Technically you can’t sue the Goblin King if you can’t get a process server to him.  Which would be the ABSOLUTE BEST SEQUEL EVER.

[wordsandshadows]

so what I’m  getting from this is

1) some people have misunderstood the point of Labyrinth

and 2) someone tried to sue the Devil. In 1971 apparently. 

[emolumentsclause-deactivated201]

the discourse has come for the sexuality-affirming david bowie classic labyrinth and i’m fucking deleting