One day I was at the crib beating my dick, getting funky (as usual)…when my (straight)neighbor suddenly knocked at the door.
So I threw on some shorts and let him in. Nigga walked in and was like:
“Daaamn bruh, I see you got dat LOUD? It smell good as FUCK in here! Tryna match sumn?”
I was like 🙄🙄🙄
Skottfrii (via skottfrii)
So the nigga comes in and sits down in the living room, makes himself at home. He sits down right next to the big ass sweaty butt print that I left where I was sitting on my couch.
I just stood there shaking my head like “🙊oh shit”…still sweating hard as fuck, hands covered in Albolene, dick semi-hard and bouncing around inside my shorts.
I went to the bedroom to grab some bud from a glass jar and throw on a shirt. When I came out the bedroom, this nigga asks me “Say bruh, wtf is this shit?”
I walked over and he was holding a bottle of Man Scent poppers. I was like 🙈….
So I walked over and grabbed them shits outta his hand, stuck em in my pocket. Then I sat down and started breaking up the weed. He sparked a blunt he already rolled up and we started shootin the shit, talkin about a movie or sumn.
So in the back of my mind, I’m thinking “cool…he ain’t stuttin that shit. Dodged that bullet. Whew”
So I went to the kitchen to dump the guts outta the cigarillo I had just split. Suddenly, I hear the TV turn on in the living room. Then I heard “Oh shit…”
When I went back the nigga was standing up, looking at the last thing that I was watching….a flick from BlackBreeders.com….
He turned, looked at me, and said
“What the fuck, bruh? It’s like THIS?!”
Then he walked over and passed me the blunt….
“Tryna get on the game, yo?” I asked him.
“Yea lol…let’s do that, mane lol” he replied.
He went over to the XBox, popped in a disc and grabbed a controller. Then he took off his shirt and stood in front the TV.
Gray sweats saggin, ass completely out like niggas be doing. I’m thinking “wow…that’s a first”
Then he sat on the couch and was like “You ready?”
Then he stood up and bent over to grab the other controller. For a long ass time, tho…
I just stood there lookin, like 🤔hmm…then he said
Shit what happened next lol
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