Hi I'm Nyrator. I have zero communication skills. So hi. Tumblr's gonna keep breaking my theme and description so yeah. I like text stuffs and manga and video games, and am apparently a vtuber now...?
The internet in general scares me nowadays, but all I can do is keep clinging onto the desire to create whatever it is I want, regardless of what it is or who may or may not like it.
I'm seeing people banned for art everywhere, and now I'm seeing people jailed for art, and it sickens me. But I have nothing else to live for but art, so even if I were to go to jail or lose everything, I still will keep trying to create in spite of it all.
I just wish I could actually put my money where my mouth is and create something.
I wonder if I should join the Yume Nikki jam this year. I lost interest in helping run it years ago, saw it was happening again, but honestly still don't think what I create is suited for that or the new people running it anymore. Who knows, if I feel inspired maybe I'll just make a game and not submit it.
I really do want to make something this year at least. Something, anything. But between work, being super depressed, and just constant brain fog and great difficulty focusing on anything, it's looking unlikely.
I did another October art challenge~ This time with a smaller Lavenyan
I like making cute and pathetic creatures... though small, they're probably older than they appear- they're just kinda pathetic and pitiful and struggle to act according to how they probably should
Hi sorry to bother you, I was a big fan of your virtual boy game red square that you made in an impressively short time period. I was wondering if you or your friend/programmer of the game (Kresna) knew about the website vintex64 selling a reproduction copy of your homebrew on their website. And whenever they asked directly for permission to sell it and whenever you profit of me buying a copy. Please forward this to Kresna if you are unsure personally.
Thank you for the heads up! Kresna and I have gone our separate ways and have lost contact with each other, but I would say they have more ownership over me in terms of this game if it's ever in question. In terms of my thoughts, I say it's free for people to do whatever they want with it!
However, we're both aware and were properly asked permission to let it be uploaded as a repro cart in the past and granted permission for them to do so (though admittedly it's been so long that I've forgotten if that's the exact site or not, as I was not in charge of the details on that), so there should be no problem there.
Note that no money goes to us, but as far as I'm aware, people are still allowed to sell the carts- please note, the digital game and the source code for it are free! You're only paying for the cartridge with the game put onto it.
Still, thank you for looking out, and thank you for enjoying the game!
Translation of Vil Schoenheit Overblot Song Crépuscule
Note: Crépuscule means Dusk in french
I've always just wanted one thing
For the seat that always goes to that boy
to become a place that I'm worthy to sit
Oh, world, tell me I'm the fairest of them all
Fairer that that boy who smiles sweetly
And if you tell me you can't grant my wish
Even though I'm trying so hard
Then I'd rather everything just melt into ghastliness
Shine
Shoot
Freeze
In beauty
A tiny flower
That's right, if that boy fell into a sleep
he would never wake from
Oh, world, tell me
that I'm one who's fairest of them all
Before it eventually fades
I'll burn out this shining life
After the final curtain call
Look at me
Forever
Only look at me
Mirror, mirror on the wall
Tell me who's the fairest of them all
Do you intend to finish the Rotten Nyan comic? I understand that you seem burnt out and more interested in other projects, but I'm mostly just curious about the high school part that was never explained, especially since you never draw that associated nyan. Of course no pressure to respond, I'm just curious!
Thank you for your interest... I'd like to someday, I really would, but the chances are looking less and less likely, to be honest..
As people probably have noticed by now, my art output has been next to zero these days- lately, I've just been super empty and creatively dry, there's no spark in anything I do lately and it just makes me want to spend most of my time in bed or killing the silence with things like vtubers or Twisted Wonderland, aha.. Just very depressed and creatively empty.. (I did try medication for a bit, but the first one I tried helped also gave me liver damage, and the second one kind of helped me focus but otherwise just made me feel forgetful and numb-y, so now I'm just off them again~)
In the back of my head, I have these projects I'd like to do someday, and RN is one of them, but I also just don't really have that passion to do it or anything else lately- I've just been floating around, unable to figure out what it is I want to do with myself. I have a list of things I'd like to do of course, but I want the desire to do these things, if that makes sense. At most, lately I've just been openly fetishizing certain quirks the nyans have, which I don't necessarily have an issue with, but even that I don't really have any goals or directions or fantasies or anything, and plus I wish I could be more varied in my output, it feels like I have nothing else to say but to pander to fetish-y things I guess..
Anyway, so for those curious about the High School Nyans, that was probably held up from a combination of not being able to structure it in a way that satisfied me, and also because.. I'm not really a big fan of high school nyan, to be honest. In terms of their life, they started gaining a social circle, picked up a sport, and stopped being bullied hardcore, but they're also very jaded from the past and hated/distrusted people and thought they were better than everyone else essentially- just a narcissistic, hate-filled chuuni. Also yeah they're super chuuni and loved stuff like Naruto and Final Fantasy 7 and would play One Winged Angel in Latin class and recite Genesis' poetry from Crisis Core by heart to people.
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