Officer Duckman

(Rp account I am not affiliated with the dev team!) hello, I’m officer duckman.

[barney-aha]

I really enjoy drinking my coffee and watching the cop try to get me, it's kinda funny

[officerduckman]

ITS NOT FUNNY nobody believes me!

[barney-aha]

Because I'm not the serial killer, duh

[officerduckman]

You are! I feel like everyone knows it but they’re messing with me…

[barney-aha]

No I'm not officer... no ones lying trust me

[officerduckman]

I can’t stand this anymore! I’ll GET you one day, and I’ll have all the evidence too!

[barney-aha]

Look a donut

[officerduckman]

I’m an adult duck I’m not stupid

[barney-aha]

Look a donut

[officerduckman]

No! Stop trying to distract me!

[barney-aha]

No seriously look, there's a giant donut behind you

[officerduckman]

What the duck

[barney-aha]

You should go eat it..

[officerduckman]

It looks good…but, no! I need to solve this case and you’re not stopping me.

[barney-aha]

It looks really good.. would be a shame if no one ate it..

[officerduckman]

It would be…

[barney-aha]

Yeah... you should go eat it..

[officerduckman]

Well, fine! But I’m watching you!

[barney-aha]

Too late I'm on the other side of town

[officerduckman]

What HOW??

[barney-aha]

I have my ways, officer

[officerduckman]

Fine then, you win…but I’ll get you one day! I swear!

[barney-aha]

I really enjoy drinking my coffee and watching the cop try to get me, it's kinda funny

[officerduckman]

ITS NOT FUNNY nobody believes me!

[barney-aha]

Because I'm not the serial killer, duh

[officerduckman]

You are! I feel like everyone knows it but they’re messing with me…

[barney-aha]

No I'm not officer... no ones lying trust me

[officerduckman]

I can’t stand this anymore! I’ll GET you one day, and I’ll have all the evidence too!

[barney-aha]

Look a donut

[officerduckman]

I’m an adult duck I’m not stupid

[barney-aha]

Look a donut

[officerduckman]

No! Stop trying to distract me!

[barney-aha]

No seriously look, there's a giant donut behind you

[officerduckman]

What the duck

[barney-aha]

You should go eat it..

[officerduckman]

It looks good…but, no! I need to solve this case and you’re not stopping me.

[barney-aha]

It looks really good.. would be a shame if no one ate it..

[officerduckman]

It would be…

[barney-aha]

Yeah... you should go eat it..

[officerduckman]

Well, fine! But I’m watching you!

[barney-aha]

Too late I'm on the other side of town

[officerduckman]

What HOW??

[barney-aha]

I really enjoy drinking my coffee and watching the cop try to get me, it's kinda funny

[officerduckman]

ITS NOT FUNNY nobody believes me!

[barney-aha]

Because I'm not the serial killer, duh

[officerduckman]

You are! I feel like everyone knows it but they’re messing with me…

[barney-aha]

No I'm not officer... no ones lying trust me

[officerduckman]

I can’t stand this anymore! I’ll GET you one day, and I’ll have all the evidence too!

[barney-aha]

Look a donut

[officerduckman]

I’m an adult duck I’m not stupid

[barney-aha]

Look a donut

[officerduckman]

No! Stop trying to distract me!

[barney-aha]

No seriously look, there's a giant donut behind you

[officerduckman]

What the duck

[barney-aha]

You should go eat it..

[officerduckman]

It looks good…but, no! I need to solve this case and you’re not stopping me.

[barney-aha]

It looks really good.. would be a shame if no one ate it..

[officerduckman]

It would be…

[barney-aha]

Yeah... you should go eat it..

[officerduckman]

Well, fine! But I’m watching you!

[barney-aha]

I really enjoy drinking my coffee and watching the cop try to get me, it's kinda funny

[officerduckman]

ITS NOT FUNNY nobody believes me!

[barney-aha]

Because I'm not the serial killer, duh

[officerduckman]

You are! I feel like everyone knows it but they’re messing with me…

[barney-aha]

No I'm not officer... no ones lying trust me

[officerduckman]

I can’t stand this anymore! I’ll GET you one day, and I’ll have all the evidence too!

[barney-aha]

Look a donut

[officerduckman]

I’m an adult duck I’m not stupid

[barney-aha]

Look a donut

[officerduckman]

No! Stop trying to distract me!

[barney-aha]

No seriously look, there's a giant donut behind you

[officerduckman]

What the duck

[barney-aha]

You should go eat it..

[officerduckman]

It looks good…but, no! I need to solve this case and you’re not stopping me.

[barney-aha]

It looks really good.. would be a shame if no one ate it..

[officerduckman]

It would be…

[barney-aha]

I really enjoy drinking my coffee and watching the cop try to get me, it's kinda funny

[officerduckman]

ITS NOT FUNNY nobody believes me!

[barney-aha]

Because I'm not the serial killer, duh

[officerduckman]

You are! I feel like everyone knows it but they’re messing with me…

[barney-aha]

No I'm not officer... no ones lying trust me

[officerduckman]

I can’t stand this anymore! I’ll GET you one day, and I’ll have all the evidence too!

[barney-aha]

Look a donut

[hospital-security]

hey who’s this damn cop. barney obviously isn’t the killer be for real

[barney-aha]

Yeah see cop, I'm not the killer

[officerduckman]

I can’t do this anymore please

[barney-aha]

I really enjoy drinking my coffee and watching the cop try to get me, it's kinda funny

[officerduckman]

ITS NOT FUNNY nobody believes me!

[barney-aha]

Because I'm not the serial killer, duh

[officerduckman]

You are! I feel like everyone knows it but they’re messing with me…

[barney-aha]

No I'm not officer... no ones lying trust me

[officerduckman]

I can’t stand this anymore! I’ll GET you one day, and I’ll have all the evidence too!

[barney-aha]

Look a donut

[officerduckman]

I’m an adult duck I’m not stupid

[barney-aha]

Look a donut

[officerduckman]

No! Stop trying to distract me!

[barney-aha]

No seriously look, there's a giant donut behind you

[officerduckman]

What the duck

[barney-aha]

You should go eat it..

[officerduckman]

It looks good…but, no! I need to solve this case and you’re not stopping me.

[barney-aha]

I really enjoy drinking my coffee and watching the cop try to get me, it's kinda funny

[officerduckman]

ITS NOT FUNNY nobody believes me!

[barney-aha]

Because I'm not the serial killer, duh

[officerduckman]

You are! I feel like everyone knows it but they’re messing with me…

[barney-aha]

No I'm not officer... no ones lying trust me

[officerduckman]

I can’t stand this anymore! I’ll GET you one day, and I’ll have all the evidence too!

[barney-aha]

Look a donut

[officerduckman]

I’m an adult duck I’m not stupid

[barney-aha]

Look a donut

[officerduckman]

No! Stop trying to distract me!

[barney-aha]

No seriously look, there's a giant donut behind you

[officerduckman]

What the duck

[barney-aha]

I really enjoy drinking my coffee and watching the cop try to get me, it's kinda funny

[officerduckman]

ITS NOT FUNNY nobody believes me!

[barney-aha]

Because I'm not the serial killer, duh

[officerduckman]

You are! I feel like everyone knows it but they’re messing with me…

[barney-aha]

No I'm not officer... no ones lying trust me

[officerduckman]

I can’t stand this anymore! I’ll GET you one day, and I’ll have all the evidence too!

[barney-aha]

Look a donut

[officerduckman]

I’m an adult duck I’m not stupid

[barney-aha]

Look a donut

[officerduckman]

No! Stop trying to distract me!

[barney-aha]

I really enjoy drinking my coffee and watching the cop try to get me, it's kinda funny

[officerduckman]

ITS NOT FUNNY nobody believes me!

[barney-aha]

Because I'm not the serial killer, duh

[officerduckman]

You are! I feel like everyone knows it but they’re messing with me…

[barney-aha]

No I'm not officer... no ones lying trust me

[officerduckman]

I can’t stand this anymore! I’ll GET you one day, and I’ll have all the evidence too!

[barney-aha]

Look a donut

[officerduckman]

I’m an adult duck I’m not stupid

[barney-aha]

I really enjoy drinking my coffee and watching the cop try to get me, it's kinda funny

[officerduckman]

ITS NOT FUNNY nobody believes me!

[barney-aha]

Because I'm not the serial killer, duh

[officerduckman]

You are! I feel like everyone knows it but they’re messing with me…

[barney-aha]

No I'm not officer... no ones lying trust me

[officerduckman]

I can’t stand this anymore! I’ll GET you one day, and I’ll have all the evidence too!

[barney-aha]

I really enjoy drinking my coffee and watching the cop try to get me, it's kinda funny

[officerduckman]

ITS NOT FUNNY nobody believes me!

[barney-aha]

Because I'm not the serial killer, duh

[officerduckman]

You are! I feel like everyone knows it but they’re messing with me…

[barney-aha]

I really enjoy drinking my coffee and watching the cop try to get me, it's kinda funny

[officerduckman]

ITS NOT FUNNY nobody believes me!

[officerduckman]

WHY ARE YOU ALL LETTING A SERIAL KILLER ON HERE

[anomalous-intern]

what serial killer, i only about the guy who likes to take our coffee

[officerduckman]

You animals make me rethink my career choice.

[anomalous-intern]

You never answered when i asked what serial killer, kinda mean

[officerduckman]

The rabbit, who’s obsessed with coffee, you know what serial killer! I came to you before!

[anomalous-intern]

there’s a serial killer? Why didn’t you come before?

[officerduckman]

What?? I did!

[anomalous-intern]

did what?

[officerduckman]

I have more important things to do.

[officerduckman]

WHY ARE YOU ALL LETTING A SERIAL KILLER ON HERE

[anomalous-intern]

what serial killer, i only about the guy who likes to take our coffee

[officerduckman]

You animals make me rethink my career choice.

[anomalous-intern]

You never answered when i asked what serial killer, kinda mean

[officerduckman]

The rabbit, who’s obsessed with coffee, you know what serial killer! I came to you before!

[anomalous-intern]

there’s a serial killer? Why didn’t you come before?

[officerduckman]

What?? I did!

[officerduckman]

WHY ARE YOU ALL LETTING A SERIAL KILLER ON HERE

[anomalous-intern]

what serial killer, i only about the guy who likes to take our coffee

[officerduckman]

You animals make me rethink my career choice.

[anomalous-intern]

You never answered when i asked what serial killer, kinda mean

[officerduckman]

The rabbit, who’s obsessed with coffee, you know what serial killer! I came to you before!

[officerduckman]

WHY ARE YOU ALL LETTING A SERIAL KILLER ON HERE

[anomalous-intern]

what serial killer, i only about the guy who likes to take our coffee

[officerduckman]

You animals make me rethink my career choice.

[officerduckman]

WHY ARE YOU ALL LETTING A SERIAL KILLER ON HERE

[thebiggestdeerpostor]

More coffee.

[officerduckman]

You can't be serious.

[thebiggestdeerpostor]

Extra coffee machine is...mandatory. Otherwise...

*He lowers his mask just to smile slightly and reveal sharpened teeth*

[officerduckman]

Am I losing it or does no one else see the issue here, you're getting it from a serial killer! Also put that back on

[thebiggestdeerpostor]

Oh, that's all you've noticed? Wow. *Puts the mask back on*

I think you have the wrong guy though, lots of animals in this town look similar.

[officerduckman]

I promise you it’s him, he took a scalpel from your hospital. I should be arresting your employees for that too..

[thebiggestdeerpostor]

Excuse me? I don't think you know how things work around here.

[officerduckman]

I think I do, giving a serial killer a weapon is illegal last time I checked?

[thebiggestdeerpostor]

Give it? We would never! Not sure how he found one.

[officerduckman]

You animals are impossible..

[thebiggestdeerpostor]

Come on now, if that was him he'd kill you by now.

[officerduckman]

Killing an officer would make him more in the spotlight! I know it’s him, all evidence says so.