Only Hope

Hi guys:) this is an advice blog that i created for you guys to have a safe place to talk about whatever you want. I will always listen and give you the most honest advice I believe will help you:) Check out the links to find help. Stay Strong! <3

[onlyhope-advice]

I am always so hard on myself and I stress about literally everything. I always end up crying almost every night. My parents keep telling me that I need to stop & that I act mental. I feel like I'm not happy anymore. When I am at school I can fake it. No one even asks. My best friend has a really stressful life too and I am always the one to help her. Sometimes I just want to die.I don't think that I would ever harm myself but you never know...I just don't really know what to do anymore.

Before anything, you should first take a breather. Not everything in life is suppose to be taken so seriously otherwise you would not be able to call it a life.:) Honestly I don’t agree with the way your parents are handling your needs because instead of trying to help it seems like they think you’re over exaggerating and that’s not fair to you. If you feel strongly about it you should try to discuss what about your worries make you constantly keep them in your mind. With that being said, you could identify what exactly makes you so stressed and try to do something entertaining to keep your mind off of it. Just always try to remember to stay calm and collected and think to yourself that nothing in this world is worth going crazy for and that even after your worries there will still be another new day tomorrow.:)

[onlyhope-advice]

The guy I lost my virginity told me he regrets never making me his girlfriend, and is planning to do it soon. I lost it to him almost 2 years ago, and I definitely wasn't it first. I'm not really sure why he has feelings for me but I'm really happy because I've always kind of had them

Take the opportunity to date him :) maybe he has always had feelings for you and was shy. You should try it who knows where the relationship can lead to.:)

[onlyhope-advice]

This is really embarrassing but Idk where to go for help. I'm a 21 y/o woman who has facial hair. You would never guess because I constantly pluck it. I have a mustache & hair on my chin & it's my biggest insecurity. I have to pluck it twice a day because it comes back so quickly. I also wax it but it doesn't work. I considered laser hair removal but I can't afford it. This is such a big problem for me I have considered suicide over it. What should I do?

quite honestly and believe it or not a lot of us girls go through this.

We all have some facial hair whether we like it or not. You shouldn’t be embarrassed at all and surely not, you shouldn’t commit suicide over this.

Trust me when I say mostly all girls wax, shave or do something to get rid of it.

Idk if this is true or not but I have heard of people lighting the hair so its lighter and you cant tell.

:) Don’t be embarrassed or upset  its only normal and like I said most of us girls do it anyway . 

[onlyhope-advice]

Hi c: I've been thinking about seeing a therapist for my anxiety for a few days now, but I don't know if I'm being dramatic. The thing is my anxiety isn't as severe as it was last year, but it's still there; it'll go away then pop back up and when it pops back up I have the urge to throw up, I can't eat, I lose sleep, and I can't focus on my school work. I talked to an adult about what I'm anxious about & it helped, but only for a few hours then it came right back. Is a therapist a good idea?

Anxiety is such a pain in the butt to deal with. Everyone goes through it one way or another and at the worst times in their lives. Each person has their own unique way of dealing whether it’d be sports, movies, music, or something to occupy themselves. I personally think if you feel the need or curiosity of seeing a therapist to see if it can help you, then why not do it? The worst that can happen is you get some more advice on how you can relieve your anxiety or completely get rid of it all together. You should remember though that whenever you feel it wanting to come to take a breather and slow down whatever it is you are focusing on or doing at that moment. I’ve noticed my anxiety comes whenever I’m overly stressing on my worries and responsibilities so I need to occupy my mind either with singing jokingly horribly or quirky dancing to do something funny and make me laugh. But all in all, I’d say go for seeing a therapist and be open to it.:) 

[onlyhope-advice]

hi so my best friend recently told me that she is a lesbian. i too, have realized that i like girls for a couple years now. anywho, my friend has a crush on this girl (who i dont know and we both dont even know if SHE likes girls) and i get sad when she talks about it with me because i think i like her (as in my friend) but i dont want to make things weird and im not sure what to do about these feelings. i feel like if i ask her out things might get really weird??

Well it is completely understandable that you feel that way or worry about the possibility of that happening, but then again if you think being with her would make you happy then you should follow your heart.:) I would say to toy with the idea first though. Maybe you could joke around with her in order to at least get the idea in her head. Who knows? Maybe she’s already thought about it as well, but is just as afraid as you are. You could tell her that sometimes you wish you could find someone like her that you trust so much and see what she says from there. It’s easy to portray the idea without actually saying it ha. With that being said, you could try to say certain things to her to see how or what she will respond with then go from there based on your judgment.:) Either way best of luck and I hope this helps.

[onlyhope-advice]

Thanks. I kinda already know what guys with kids are like because my brother has a six year old. My only actual concern is with the mother but it seems like things are okay there. And if they aren't, well, I've probably dealt with worse.

She shouldn’t tell you anything because their relationship is over.

As long as you set a boundary with her child everything should be ok :)

[onlyhope-advice]

There's this guy. He's 22 to my 18. We've been talking and it seems to be going really well. We get along perfectly and he makes me feel the right way; it's just exactly what it should be. The only issue is I told my friends he has a three year old son. They immediately told me I'm not allowed to date a guy who has a kid unless I have a kid and I obviously do not have a kid. I don't have any issue with him having a son but my friends are confusing me. Is it really a big deal that he has a kid?

No its not a big deal that he has a kid, just remember that with a child there is always going to be another woman involved in his life. Also his child is always going to be his first priority, at least I hope so, and you are going to have to be perfectly ok with that.

Other than that no, like I said it shouldn’t be a big deal. :)

[onlyhope-advice]

Hi! I need some advice... *blushes* I want to be a professional dancer. I love dancing, is everything in my life, and I'm very good at it. I can't imagine my life without dance... but I come from a very closed-minded family who think it's silly wanting to live as an artist. I haven't talked to them yet and I'm very scared. And the sad thing is sometimes I'm still embarrassed that I want to do that :( What should I do? Sorry for my English

Its ok! Why are you embarrassed? You shouldn’t be embarrassed its something you want to do and there is nothing wrong with that.

There is not much you can do but sit your parents down and tell them this is something you really want to do in life, and you would hope they could support you in this.

The thing that I’ve known to help is to talk to parents calmly and in a adult manner.

Don’t let them bring your spirits and dreams down if its something you truly want to do.

 :)

[onlyhope-advice]

Whomever made this Tumblr account, thank you. Thank you so much for being here and for being you. I am twenty three years old and I love girls more than boys. The reason why is because I was raped when I was six and twenty years old by two men. I feel save around females. I want to come out on liking girls and tell my Mom and step Dad, but I don't know how too. My Mom thinks it is a sin. Step Dad too. I don't know what to do and am scared. Yeah, embarrassing for my age. Always, Aimee

Awww :) you’re welcome.

No not embarrassing I know is hard, especially to parents because we don’t ever want to hurt and disappoint them.

But you know what don’t keep it hidden anymore you are their kid. This is what makes you, YOU, and there is nothing wrong with you liking the same sex, nothing at all.

Yes they are your parents but they have no right in telling you anything, because guess what? You can’t change and you shouldn’t have to you are perfect just the way you are.

Just sit them down and tell them, tell them the truth, they might be mad for a while but I think they might get over it.

Talk to them with confidence and in a adult manner.

Please keep me updated :)

[onlyhope-advice]

Hey there. Recently I've been feeling left out since I'm not currently "up to date" with things. A lot of my friends are totally engrossed in certain video games and I feel like I can't add to the conversation since I haven't (and can't) play them. It's so hard to feel comfortable around them since that's all they talk about or they turn the conversation towards those topics. Any advice on how to handle this?

well you can try and play the games with them, maybe at their house?

Or you can try and find something else you and your friends are interested in?

[onlyhope-advice]

So I have a friend who is 22. He's such a lovely person and is good looking (this isn't just my opinion). I decided the other week I liked him. A friend of his was with me the other day who's know him for 8 years and was asking me if he'd ever slept with anyone because she didn't think he had. I found this strange and just assumed he would have. Would it be weird if he's 22 and a Virgin? I'm not sure what to think of this. It wouldn't put me off him but is it a bit strange?

I actually had a friend that was a virgin up until 20 something.

I don’t think its strange I think its quite romantic you don’t find many guys like that anymore. :)

[onlyhope-advice]

so i really like this boy at school and hes been my crush for almost 3 years and the other day i asked him to if we could take a pic together and he said yeah that was the first time i ever talked to him so we took the picture and he put his around me after he asked for my name then i told him and he smiled and left the next day my friends said he was staring at me and that it seemed that he was following me i expected him to say something but he didn't say anything. does he like me? -anon

He might, at least it seems like it.

By the looks of it though he might be a little shy to make a move, meaning this is your chance if you like him to talk to him and maybe be  bit more then just friends :)

[onlyhope-advice]

I just want to die. I told my boyfriend and he said I have to get help tomorrow. I see a counselor and psychiatrist. My meds are stronger than I'm used to and I feel like I'm losing my mind with nightmares and mood swings. I just want to be done trying I've been working towards nothing for so long. Most times I want my problems to be a secret from everyone other times want to be put in a mental hospital and fixed or drugged for the rest of my life. I'm not sure why I sent this, I needed to vent.

No, No its ok.

You still have much more to see, many more things to learn and do. You might be having a hard time now but I promise it wont be that way all the time.

Venting is actually better than keeping things to yourself, keeping things in only causes anger and stress.

Talk to someone you trust or myself im here to listen if you have a kik you can kik me whenever and I will sit down and talk to you.

Don’t ever hesitate in talking to someone.

[onlyhope-advice]

The other day i went to a rave and ended up losing my virginity to a guy i just met. I don't regret it or anything. But it was unprotected, so should i go get myself checked out? I'm wondering if this would be classed as slutty? Btw i'm 17

Yes! you should definitely go get checked out for STD ASAP!

As for a pregnancy you will have to wait until the day your period is due.

Slutty Is honestly based on what ppl themselves think; as for me I don’t consider it slutty and you shouldn’t either, you are almost of legal age.

As for him I hope he wasn’t too older because if something happens he can get in serious trouble.

Good luck and please keep me up to date I would love to see how you are doing.

[onlyhope-advice]

Okay so I told my friend that I'm going to this concert ((7 hours away from me)) and she like invited herself so I was like okay you know and then I ask my dad and he said that he doesn't want her to come what do I say to my friend now? Help omfgg.

I hate it when people invite themselves, rude much lol?

There is only two things you can do.

1. Tell her the truth and say your dad didn’t want her to go.

or

2. Lie and tell her that your dad wanted it to be a bonding thing for you and him and that you are sorry.

This is a little tough one because she is going to get hurt either way so you just have to rip the bandage and tell her. something :)

Good luck X)

[onlyhope-advice]

Hi, so I had a pretty rough night tonight. My friend found out that I had cut myself, and I know that self harm is bad, but she's really concerned about me. I guess it's good to know that people care about me, but normally I'm the one helping, not the one getting the help. Anyways, she told her mom and they offered for me to see a counsilor, but I feel like I'm being ambushed and she just doesn't get it. I don't know what I'm asking for, just help I guess.

Hello anon. So obviously you already know the concept that self-harm is bad and such, but it isn’t just bad for you. You’re making your friend sad as well. If you’re used to seeing others in need of help and you truly feel the need to help them then you should be able to understand where your friend is coming from. Although I don’t completely agree with her telling her mother because you’re right it does seem like a bombardment all at once. However, the only reason it was said was to help you so she does care. I truly think seeing a counselor would be beneficial to you not only to talk about why you do the things you do to yourself, but to also seek a way to stop it. I know its hard to talk about and let out how you feel trust me I’ve been there myself feeling like every blood drop was a release of something hurtful inside it doesn’t mean its actually gone until you talk it out. Who knows? You may not even need a counselor to talk to now that you know she truly cares you could talk to her about how you’re feeling at times and to confide in someone close to you so that you’ll feel 10x better.:) Just remember to do what actually makes you feel better and happy and away from self-harm because even though we’ve never met nor possibly never have chatted before you can add one more person who cares about you and wants you to be happy:)

[onlyhope-advice]

I know this is off topic for this blog but you you mind answering if fellas find it ok for girls to masturbate and watch porn ? Idk I'm kinda curious about doing it tbh

No its not off topic at all.

And I know it all depends on the guy some guys find it really “Hot”

and others not so much .

:) sorry for the late reply