Alisa U Zemlji Chuda

Andulka
trying on a metaphor
Monterey Bay Aquarium

Janaina Medeiros
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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Cosmic Funnies
Show & Tell
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@theartofmadeline

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let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

Discoholic šŖ©

⣠Chile in a Photography ā£
noise dept.
Not today Justin
DEAR READER
wallacepolsom

#extradirty
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@onthefieldsable
āThe Kissā by Klimt
The First Time I Saw You
Dear Mother,
I fell in love with a man at the first sight.
I understand that you might be worried because you are not with me for advice. I miss you. And, I know that nobody around me will give me as sincere and wise advice as you.
But, mother, please donāt be worried. When he and I first looked into each otherās eyes, at the summer party at Dr. Petersonās house, we both knew that we were each otherās destiny.
It might sound crazy, but he was no stranger to me. Do you remember Dr. Gerald Thayer from my scientific magazines? The doctor who won the Lasker? It was him - my ideal.
When he approached me, I thought he walked out of my collections. My heart was pounding. He smiled and asked me my name. And, my entire world turned red - spinning.
I told him my name, and he said I look cute. Then, he offered me if I would like to go out to the balcony with him.Ā There, we shared a few words and some beers. We chuckled for things that sounded smart and stupid. It was hot and muggy, and we were sweating.
Suddenly, we kissed. He wrapped his arms around me, and inside his arms, I felt complete - floating in a romantic dream.
Since then, it has been 3 months with Gerald, and I am grateful. He always teaches me how special I am.
He buys me apparels from Chanel because he said he was worried I would look like a slut little shallow. He is very thoughtful and sweet. He picks my outfit everyday along with underclothes. He also picks and sprays me a fragrance of his choice. He makes me his princess.
He also hired me as his only assistant for his research. We work together in his lab at night, as he is always busy with his other work in the day. He pays gives me $50/hr for the work, and he told me that this is not usual treatment for an undergrad like me.
He does so much for me, Mother.
But, Mother, I am scared. Sometimes, a strange fear comes into my mind, and it makes me feel useless. No, I am useless. I make too many mistakes at work and upsets Gerald. Iām sorry that Iām not good enough for him.
He does so much for me, yet I am a person who can never be better. He always assures me that he loves me. But, I know. He told me that a doctor like him risks more things to lose than an undergrad like me if our relationship gets revealed.
And, his words are hurting haunting me.
Mother, could you pray for me in heaven? I want to be a better person who qualifies him.
I want to be better.
I miss you. Love you.
-Love
āThe Kissā by Klimt (Virtually Vandalized by the writer)
Million Times I Saw You
Love was feeling that something had gone off. Something was wrong.Ā
Maybe she was being over-dramatic, but she couldnāt resist the feeling of having a little bug tickling the side of her mouth.
Love had the instinct that something was not exactly the same as what she had known. She had been dating her flawless man Doctor Gerald Thayer for 6 months, and there were questions inside of her about him that werenāt answered.
Who is Gerald?Ā
Love knew Gerald from his cover on magazine, news, and media - but, not as in person. She had been dating him for 6 months, and Gerald had always been the guy from the magazine to her. Ideal, but not close.
Love was sitting on the couch, pondering of that strange evening last Tuesday when Gerald bumped into a guy at the cafe. The stranger seemed to know Gerald and greeted friendly. However, he called Gerald āJack.ā Gerald told him that that he wasnāt Jack, but he seemed to know that name.Ā
It had been over a week that happened, but Love couldnāt stop thinking about the strange encounter. Gerald treated like that evening was nothing, but it wasnāt anything to Love.
beep-beep-
Love noticed the doorbell. She walked across the living room to open the door. It was Gerald. But, why wasnāt he wearing the glasses he wore in the morning?Ā
Gerald was frowning. He seemed upset. A sudden, quiet fear - that Love was now used to - arose slowly inside her stomach.Ā
āGerald, did I do something wrong again? Is that why youāre back? Iām sorry. Could you please tell me what Iāve done wrong this time?ā
ā.. Who the hell are you?ā
Gerald seemed as if he found something awfully wrong.Ā
āAre you Jackās girlfriend? Is that why you are at his house?ā
Love recognized the name - Jack.Ā It was Jack again.Ā
Love was confused. Gerald said he didnāt know Jack, but now he seemed to know Jack. What was happening?
āIām confused, Gerald. Iām your girlfriend. Is this because I forgot to wear the pajama you picked for me last night?ā
āFuck! It is Jackson again. Girl, you should know - he lied to you.ā
Gerald quickly rubbed his head as he was texting.
ā.. What do you mean?ā
Love asked carefully, as tears slowly filled up her eyes. She couldnāt understand why he was ghosting her. Was it a break-up which he wanted?
āDonāt you get it? Youāve been deceived by that little rat!ā
āWhat...?ā
āJack is my twin brother. And, he borrows my name to hook up with chicks.ā
Love gasped. She didnāt know Gerald had twin. Or, she didnāt know anything.Ā
For million times she looked at Gerald, million times she didnāt see Gerald. Love fell onto the floor. She covered her mouth with her two hands, shaking - frightened.Ā
Hell. It was something that started with simple āhelloā to love and then back to hello without o.Ā
Love finally faced the truth.
āThe Kissā by Klimt (Virtually Vandalized by the writer)
āThe Kissā by Klimt (Virtually Vandalized by the writer)
The Last Time I Saw You
January 7th
Stop calling me, psycho. I donāt love you anymore. I donāt trust you.
January 10th
DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE. DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE.DIE. Ā
Go Fuck yourself, asshole. I donāt believe you.
January 12th
But, Gerald loved me... he did love me.Ā
..... Didnāt he?
January 13th
No, he didnāt. Go fuck yourself, Gerald, Jack, or Jackson, whatever.Ā Iām tired. I canāt get off my bed. I want to drown myself. I want to die. I canāt believe I was such a fool to believe him.
January 15th
Why is he keep calling me? Doesnāt he understand that I donāt want to talk to him anymore?
January 16th
.. Should I try getting his call? The last time I saw him he did say he was sorry.
..................... shit, Iām fucking crazy.
I should stop drinking and really shouldnāt call him.
January 20th
Lady from the admissions office of University of Dupont called me last night. They said they want to talk to me regarding the graduate student Jackson Thayer for using the laboratory at night without the permission from the faculty. Well, luckily he paid me for being as an assistant for his fake research from his own pocket, so at least that wouldnāt cause him trouble.
...... HAHAHAHA.
Fuck you, Gerald-Jack.Ā
January 23rd
I gave my massive files regarding the trouble Jack caused to the admissions office. Files of paperworks on how he deceived me to believe that he is Dr. Gerald Thayer, made me his girlfriend/lab assistant, and made him live with him to treat like a little barbie doll. I hope he gets screwed up real bad.
Iām really over him.
January 25th
.. I met Jack.
January 26th
..... it was really Jack.
January 27th
I canāt stop thinking about Jack. Last time I saw him, he just went past me, but he looked thinner than when I saw him before the break-up. Of course, I shouldnāt think of him anymore, but it just makes me feel weird. Just before we ended our relationship, he did threaten me that he would commit suicide if I leave him.
......... But, but... that shouldnāt be my business anymore right? Itās not my fault if he actually tried to commit suicide.. but what if..... No. No. No. No.Ā That canāt be my fault. HE TRICKED ME. HE DESERVES THIS.
Stop thinking - THIS HAS TO BE THE LAST TIME I SEE HIM.Ā
I donāt love him. He mustāve moved on - thatās why he didnāt greet me like before.Ā
He was toxic. Not Good.
I need to move on too. GOOD BYE JACK.
January 28th
But were his lies that bad? What if Jack......................................
-Ā part of Loveās diary for her mental therapy (without progress - never ending)