Martín: How did none of you hear what I just said?!
Gael: I've been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.
Cecilia: I got distracted halfway through.
Noah: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.
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@orangefireflies
Martín: How did none of you hear what I just said?!
Gael: I've been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.
Cecilia: I got distracted halfway through.
Noah: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.
Martín, in a room with Noah, Cecilia, and Gael: It’s calm in here.
Martín: It scares me…
Leo: Hey dad, can I get some icecream?
Jasper: Only a spoonful!
Leo: *Proceeds to pull out a comically large spoon.*
Alane: I dropped Leo.
Jasper: Alane, what the fuck.
Alane & Leo: *accidentally set the kitchen on fire*
Alane: We need an adult!
Leo: Mom, you are an adult!
Alane: We need an adultier adult! Get your dad!
Alane: Leo, what do you have?
Leo: A KNIFE!
Alane: Okay, have fu-
Jasper: NO!
Alane: Know why I called you in here?
Howlett: Because I accidentally sent you a dick pic.
Alane: *Stops pouring two glasses of wine.* Accidentally?
Image by 명도 김
Jasper : What can therapy do for me that screaming in my car for 30 minutes can’t?
Jasper: I think I should be allowed on ghost hunter tv shows.
Alane: I think that would be dangerous for the ghosts.
Alane: No more making fun of me when I misuse dated cultural references, alright? Are we cowabunga on this?
Jasper, sighing: Fine. We're cowabunga.
Alane: I’ve only had Jasper for a day and a half but if anything happened to him I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.
Jasper: Why should I make the bed, when we're just gonna unmake it to sleep in it anyways?
Alane: Why should I feed you if you're just gonna die anyways?
Jasper:
Jasper: I'll go make the bed-
Alane: Good morning. As you begin your day, remember that violence is always an option and often the answer.
Jasper:
Alane:
Jasper: ...Please, go back to bed.
Alane: I like your new pants!
Jasper: Thanks, they were 50% off!
Alane: I’d like them better if they were 100% off. *winks*
Jasper: The store can’t just give away clothes for free.
Alane: Thats’s… not what I meant.
Jasper: That’s a terrible way to run a business, Alane.
Socrates: God has let me live another day and I am going to make it everyone's problem.
Socrates: Do not ask me what I am talking about. I do not know, okay? I am just the vessel. The message has been gifted. I have moved on.