Hi! I’m in a relationship with a wonderful lb. I’ve never been much into being dominant but what I’ve tried and experienced with him so far it’s amazing. I love being a caregiver but I need a how to guide! It’s so much to learn. He just keeps telling me to check diapers all the time, take control. I honestly am not sure how to start, just want to make my baby happy.
I think it's easy to both Overthink and under commit here.. but I'm not sure without knowing your actual partner or you.
That said, here's some basic tips I've repeatedly espoused and find good advice in general:
Consistency is sexy! Getting one diapee check is one thing, but getting your mommy or daddy or caregiver or partner to check you repeatedly throughout the day, unexpectedly? Is huge. Same with other things... like, accountability and consistency, that's a big part of being the dominant party in your relationship
Enthusiasm! If you seem to be engaged and enjoying your little will be more engaged and joyful, go forth and enjoy that sexy and enthusiastic play together!
When someone is asking for what he is, he's likely imagining the storybook ideal instead of reality. He likely wants complete regression and total dependence on his mommy. But that's not realistic, so it's often important to discuss expectations! You never know what your partner is expecting until you ask. And if they can't articulate their needs or desires, you really can't be expected to meet them, and it isn't even close to fair!
Communicate the limits... not just hard sexual limits but the limits of this relationship! Do you expect to be their caregiver full time? Only in the bedroom? Do you switch, or what are YOUR desires and kinks, and are they being met?
Get into what YOU like! Remember that this isn't a one sided experience. Share the bits that excite you, that drive you! Enjoy yourself so much, because you are giving heavily of yourself... and you deserve the same kinds of attention and care back!
If you're being asked a lot, your partner might have hidden or poorly expressed desires, so call them on it! If they keep bringing it up, ask! Every time ask what they mean! Otherwise how could you ever feel good being told over and over you need to do more! So don't wait, ask what your partner means!
In the end, open communicating, being enthusiastic, finding the stuff you enjoy, and being a consistent and reliable partner are hard but the most important parts of these kinds of kinky dynamics. So do what you can, enjoy what you like, and hopefully your partner will be able to enjoy it as much as you! And if not... well you've done the best you can and nobody can possibly ask you for more than that!
Good luck, little friends!
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