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❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
trying on a metaphor
blake kathryn
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Misplaced Lens Cap
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Sweet Seals For You, Always
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Love Begins
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YOU ARE THE REASON
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Three Goblin Art
@theartofmadeline
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@pagodkagurl
Totoo palang may resentment after few years of being a mom, noh? Hindi naman sa hindi mo gustong maging nanay. Pero iba talaga yung pagbabago sa babae. Physically, mentally, emotionally, laki talaga ng nababago. Napaparant nga ako sa nanay ko, iba talaga eh.
Super draining.
Nakakaubos.
Hoyyy. Nararanasan ko na ung gandang ganda sa anak. HAHAAHAHAHA. Typical mom na si madam xD
The unnecessary things we had to endure just because kamag anak kami ng someone and the benefits of which na hindi naman namin nakukuha. Yung extrang mata na nakatitig samin just because of that. Too bad, pumapatol ako. Well, not because I want to, I just need to.
Favorite nyo lang talaga ako iissue. Goodluck sa inyo. Salamat na din. Sana wag kayong ireport sa mas mataas sa inyo. Ako kase, hindi ko gagawin. Wont even waste my time. Kaso kase, di nga kayo dumeretso sakin, lupon nyo nakaalam, edi sana wag kayong ireport. Sila na lang bantayan nyo
Kita nyo na. Pag kasi mabait ako, kung ano ano sinasabi nyo. Pag pinatulan ko kayo, masama na ugali ko. Konsensya nyo na bahala sa inyo.
Noong nakaraang araw, nagchat sakin ung schoolmate ko, kala ko mangangamusta lang, trabaho, ganern. Tapos sabi nya, "ganda ka pa rin". Parang di ako natuwa 😅 talaga? Dun ako naalala? Hindi ung naging officer ako? Hindi ung natulungan kita sa assignment mo? Ganda talaga? Dun lang ba ko maaalala? 😅 sayang naman ata efforts ko 😅
Salamat sa Dios❤
Alam mo ung legit happiness para sa ibang tao na nakakaraos sa painful past, yun yung feeling ko ngayon. I can't believe na napakinggan ung mga panalangin ko na mapunta ka sana sa mabuting babae because you deserve it. Salamat sa Dios❤ pero baka marami ring nananalangin non haha. Amfeeling ko lang. Anyways, wala na kong inaalala. Samahan nawa tayong lahat ng Dios sa paninagong step sa pagrerelasyon serye. Charing xD
Ang sensitive ko ngayon. Dalawang beses na kong umiiyak ngayong araw. Ang lungkot lang talaga. Di ko alam. Bagsak talaga ko ngayon.
So, kanina ung technical exam nung inapplyan ko. Tatlo kami, ako lang ung babae. Naalala ko tuloy noong IT positions ang inaapplyan ko, lagi akong natatanong na, "kaya mo ba? Trabahong lalake un." Haha kasuka. Buti di ako natanggap don. Anyways, di naman ako nadiscriminate, naalala ko lang.
Di naman ako familiar sa inaapplyan kong position, in short, nanghuhula lang ako ng isasagot at nanghula na nga ako ng isinagot. Pero intelligent hula naman HAHAHA. Binase ko dun sa initial interview nila. Ung mga tinanong nila don, narealize ko na un ung ipapaexam nila kasi un ung hinahanap nilang skills. So ang madam nyo, nagreview sa business keme. Mabilisan lang HAHA. Pero sempre, wala sa exam ung mga nabasa ko. So nanghula nga ako, diba. Ung nasa kanan ko, tanong ng tanong my gulay, titser mo ko? Charot haha. Pero sempre, kahit dehado ako, dahil insider silang applicant, ako lang hindi, sinagot ko pa din ayon sa "intelligent hula" ko, na sinabi ko naman na di ako sigurado pero un talaga ung sinagot ko sa exam. Kada tanong nya, mga mamsh, ineexplain ko pa sheti, tinitingnan ako nung bantay HAHA. Ung nasa kaliwa ko, matalino sa tingin ko. Taas din ng ilong, nahiya ung ilong ko hahaha. Mala richard gomez ung half ng face nya, kasi nga naka face mask so hindi ko kita masyado. Pero kahit mala daniel padilla o paulo avelino my loves pa sya, sorry, ilalavarn ko ung inaapplyan ko HAHA. Ako dapat ang matanggap, hindi sya. Char xD pero ayun na nga. Ung sagot ko talaga crafted mula sa mga tanong nila noong initial interview kaya matalino pagkakahula ko dun. Ayun ang kagandahan ng may initial interview.
Share lang. Di kasi interesado ung kekwentuhan ko leshe nababadtrip ako HAHAHA. So, imbis na maghanap ako ng ibang kekwentuhan, dito na lang. Kayo na lang. Ang nipis ko din kasi lately. Pero simple lang naman diba? Kamustahin man lang ako diba? Eh mamatay na ko sa pag aalala kasi di sumasagot, prenti pa din sya nanunuod ng netflix, wapakels daw😅
Sorry ha. Nakakairita na ung mga basurang cheater. Gagawa ng separate account para sa pangangaliwa mo? G a g o k a p a l a e h. Pag tiningnan mo naman ung profile, di naman friend ung jowa nya don. Tapos magpopost sa primary account nya na nanganak na jowa nya. Haha salot kayo
Noong medyo bata bata ako, di talaga ko nagpapatalo. I always make sure na ung opinyon ko, maipaintindi ko, at least. Ngayon ko lang napansin, di ko na ginagawa yon. Napagod na ko haha. Nakakapagod pala. 😅 nakakapagod mag express ng opinyon. Tinatabangan na naman ako makipag usap sa tao.
I lost time
When I started working, I promised to keep in touch. Well, that wasn't the case. I had to work my ass off. I prepare at 5am, reach home at 12mn. Then repeat. I barely had time for my self. I lost track. I lost friends. I became alone. I had to stick with my boyfriend for most of the time because I had no one. I then forgot to take care of my health and now it's taking a toll on me. During this quarantine, I was able to get some rest. I never thought that my body would take it negatively. I had panic attacks, like, all throughout the pandemic season xD i couldnt breathe. My heart is always racing and Im not even exaggerating. I was rushed to the ER one time because I thought Im gonna die. Half of my body was experiencing tingling sensations and numbness, it started from my head down to my tummy. Like literally, I thought it was my end. The doctor told me I had to stay calm, and I never thought that I would be asking how do I calm my self? I had no one. I don't have anyone to talk to. I was hesitant to chat anyone. I was alone. I am alone.
In the end, I wasn't.
I know I'm not, you know, "the best" at anything. I am not good at studies yet I received a recognition. And I know it happened with the help of my friends and Im so thankful that they helped me a lot. Im not a good friend. I never ask them how they've been or how they are doing now, I thought they had to reach out. And I'm not even doing it intentionally. I was just not the kind of person to do so. I know I'm not good and because of that, I lost a lot of friends. I deserve it, maybe. But Im just not the friend-for-all-seasons. I am the text-me-when-you-need-me-and-Im-come-running kind of friend. Or maybe I wasn't needed anymore. With my personality, I had to wait for people to ask me how I've been before I can have the courage to ask them the same. When I miss opportunities, I tend to wait again for another in order to reply. I dont even know why. I overcome this already but now, it's back xD I wasn't a good friend nor I deserve to be treated like one. And today, I got sad. I know I shouldnt, but I am sad. I thought it was just "tampo" but I am real sad. Will they come if it will be my turn? Will the room be filled with just relatives and no friends at all? Do I have friends? Have they considered me a friend? I'm sad.
ayoko na po
yung sawang sawa ka na. gusto ko na lang matulog mga 5 days.
omg. di lang ako ang nagkakamali sa trabaho. yes ynah. di sila perfect palagi. okay lang magkamali. wag tayong mag panic. kaka-relieve sa damdamin xD feeling ko mamamatay na ko pag nagkakamali ako
