the signs as Rick and Morty quotes
Aries: I've got about a thousand memories of your dumb little ass and about six of them are pleasant, the rest is annoying garbage!
Taurus: Get your shit together. Get it all together and put it in a backpack, all your shit, so it's together. And if you gotta take it somewhere, take it somewhere, you know? Take it to the Shit Store and sell it, or put it in a Shit Museum, I don't care what you do, you just gotta get it together. Get your shit together.
Gemini: Listen, I'm not the nicest guy in the universe because I'm the smartest, and being nice is something stupid people do to hedge their bets.
Cancer: Aw, man. I really liked this life. Well, at least I didn't really crap my pants.
Leo: Whatever you're asking, the answer is I'm amazing.
Virgo: What, so everyone's supposed to sleep every single night now? You realize that nighttime makes up half of all time?
Libra: Yeah sure, I mean, if you spend all day shuffling words around, you can make anything sound bad.
Scorpio: I thought the whole point of having a dog was to feel superior. If I were you I wouldn't pull that thread.
Sagittarius: You gotta flip 'em off, I told them it means "peace among worlds", how hilarious is that!
Capricorn: Don't waste your brain on those weirdos... They just put you at the center of their lives because you're powerful, and then because they put you there, they want you to be less powerful.
Aquarius: Okay, well...sometimes science is more art than science. Lot of people don't get that.
Pisces: Nobody exists on purpose, nobody belongs anywhere, everybody's gonna die. Come watch TV?
