through adversity to the stars

Andromeda Tonks, fifty years old, grandmother to Teddy Lupin.

[thegoldenyears-memories]

                             ⊰ AN ANDROMEDA BLACK MIX ⊱

01. Rainy Day Women | Bob Dylan { x }

Well, they’ll stone you when you’re trying to be so good They’ll stone you just a-like they said they would They’ll stone you when you’re trying to go home Then they’ll stone you when you’re there all alone But I would not feel so all alone. 

02. We Exist | Arcade Fire { x }

Daddy it’s true I’m different from you But tell me why they treat me like this?

03. Dream | Priscilla Ahn { x }

Now I’m old and feeling grey. I don’t know what’s left to say about this life I’m willing to leave. I lived it full and I lived it well, there’s many tales I’ve lived to tell. I’m ready now, I’m ready now, I’m ready now to fly from the highest wing.

04. Kingdom Come | The Civil Wars { x }

Run fast as you can No one has to understand Fly high across the sky from here to kingdom come.

05. It’s hard to get around the wind | Alex Turner { x }

Looking for a new place to begin Feeling like it’s hard to understand But as long as you still keep peppering the pill You’ll find a way to spit it out, again And even when you know the way it’s gonna blow It’s hard to get around the wind. 

06. This is your sword | Bruce Springsteen { x }

The times they are dark Darkness covers the earth This world’s filled with the beauty of God’s work Hold tight to your promise Stay righteous, stay strong For the days of miracles will come along.

07. Whatever | Oasis { x }

I’m free to be whatever I Whatever I choose And I’ll sing the blues if I want I’m free to say whatever I Whatever I like If it’s wrong or right it’s alright.

08. I’m in here | Sia { x }

I’m in here, a prisoner of history, Can anybody help?

09. Princes of the Universe | Queen { x }

Here we are, born to be kings We’re the princes of the universe

10. Every Breaking Wave | U2 { x }

 If you go? If you go your way and I go mine Are we so? Are we so helpless against the tide? Here we belong, fighting to survive In a world with the darkest powers

[narcissamacaulays]

AVENUE OF HOPE PICSPAM ↳ ANDROMEDA BLACK

It’s a very Greek idea, and a very profound one. Beauty is terror. Whatever we call beautiful, we quiver before it. And what could be more terrifying and beautiful, to souls like the Greeks or our own, than to lose control completely? To throw off the chains of being for an instant, to shatter the accident of our mortal selves? 

. —Donna Tartt, “The Secret History”

[ursamxnor-deactivated20150819]

tedromeda go on

Send me a ship and I'll tell you:

who holds the umbrella when it rainsTed is taller, but also carrying the shopping bags, so it’s Andromeda who holds the umbrella and attempts to keep both of them dry. However, it often ends with one half of Ted being soaked to the skin. When they are just going for a stroll in the park, they both hold the umbrella, or rather, Ted holds the umbrella and Andromeda holds his hand.

who is the grumpiest in the morningAndromeda generally wakes up before Ted, and so even if she is grumpy, she has some time to properly wake up while preparing breakfast. Ted has his days when he’d rather stay in bed instead of going to work, but how could one be grumpy when waking up next to the love of one’s life?

who worries more when the other is sick/hurtThey’re equally worried for each other, but Andromeda’s a Healer, so she actually knows how bad it is, while Ted tends to overreact a little. It takes Andromeda a while to reassure him that she’s fine, and he’s no big help during that phase.

who plays pranks on the otherThey both do, but only when Nymphadora isn’t around to witness this. A lot of those harmless pranks end in a duel, throwing hexes at each other and ruining the furniture, which is easily repaired, thankfully.

who is always the first to suggest cuddling on the sofaAndromeda can’t stay away too long when they’re sitting on the sofa. If they have company, she at least scoots close enough to touch him, whether it’s holding his hand or resting her head on his shoulder. When they’re alone, though, her favourite spot’s on his lap, face buried in the crook of his neck while he’s watching TV.

who insists on creating nicknames for the otherAndromeda started it with calling him “Teddy”, followed by “Teddy Bear”, and “Tedward”. She only calls him “Edward” when something’s wrong or he’s in trouble.

who drools on the other when they’re asleepTed tends to drool while sleeping, whereas Andromeda talks in her sleep. She has gotten used to it by now, and jokes about saving time by not needing a shower.

who says ‘I love you’ firstThey take turns, even though Ted probably says it more often, and often out of the blue, as if he just realised this, or fell in love with her all over again in this very moment.

[the-house-of-slytherin]

Andromeda Tonks

[ursamxnor-deactivated20150819]

Moodboard for Tedromeda, requested by ursamxjor

[the-house-of-slytherin]

I know my sister will come after me. She’s jealous. She wants me all for herself. She’d be ready to kill my daughter any moment. We’ve got to guard ourselves well,Ted. Until Dora goes to Hogwarts.

[dickgrxysn]

edm + text posts

[perardua-ad-astra]

Then the Drink Takes You || Andromeda & Rodolphus || May 2002

[sans-peur-et-sans-reproche]

He is suddenly very aware his hand is on her hip. It has him wondering when the last time was he had touched a woman. Any woman, more intimately than a simple touch. The day before the Battle of Hogwarts, he thinks. He could probably give the exact time if he thought about it. But he couldn’t very well let her go. He’s reminded of times he helped Bellatrix to bed after her drinking escapades. Whether they were at a party or she was in a mood and determined to drink herself under the table. He couldn’t count the number of times he’d fished her out of the Malfoy’s fountain, regardless of her intent to drag him under the water with her.

“You need a proper nights sleep," he says. Without a second thought his arm drops to get her under the knees. He has her cradled against him in an instant. The couch would only make her feel worse in the morning. Belle always did better in the morning when she’d had the chance to sleep properly.

He ignores any and all protests, it’s not like he’s unaccustomed to it, and carries her upstairs. His surveillance of the house gave him a good idea of where her bedroom was. It was generally the last light that went out and he could see it from his shed. He nudges the door open and sets her down on one side of the bed. He doesn’t know if it’s her side or not, but he certainly can’t pull the covers down while he’s holding her. Once they’re down far enough he kneels on the mattress, leaning over to her to try and urge her to roll into the prepared space. He was feeling too fatigued to do much more. “Meda, come over here and you can sleep. You’ll feel better in the morning.”

[perardua-ad-astra]

She had half a mind to smack him. Andromeda Tonks was not carried up the stairs to her bed. Not this Andromeda Tonks, at least; there had been a time when Ted had been the one to carry her to bed, but she was much older now, and a widow, and widows were not carried to bed by their brothers-in-law. Especially brothers-in-law on the run, guilty of innumerable war crimes.

It was becoming harder and harder to think of Rodolphus as a hardened, cold-blooded murderer, though. It was wrong, she knew, to allow her old self to surface when it came to what remained of the pureblood circle, but since the war's end Andromeda had found herself growing closer to her old family, feeling as though she fit them better--she had always felt out of place, oddly so, amongst the people who had accepted her after being disowned.

In her state, she couldn't have fought Rodolphus off if she'd tried. Despite his years on the run he was hardier than she--perhaps because he had not suffered the same physical abuse she had--and when Dolphus made up his mind, he was going to carry through with it. So she protests, as much as she can to keep her pride, and when he settles her on the bed she huffs and shifts away from him (she is not very successful, given the discomfort of the motion required to put much distance between them).

"I am not an invalid," she reminds him, unsure why the words come out except from the strange feeling she gets from having him in the bedroom she hasn't shared with anyone older than Teddy for over five years. "You don't need to carry me places, for Salazar's sake." She doesn't often use pseudo-swears that invoke her old House's name, having decided long ago not to keep reminding herself of the House that would call her blood traitor, but the word slips through. "Do you want to tuck me in, Dolphus? Will you hold me down if I refuse to sleep?" She's teasing, but looking oddly as if she's considering the rebellion.

[firewhisky]

The Black Family + Constellations

Bellatrix (Gamma Orionis) is the third brightest star in the constellation Orion, named after the Greek myth of Orion the hunter. Bellatrix means “female warrior”. Andromeda is a constellation named after the Greek myth of Andromeda, daughter of Aethiopian king Cepheus and his wife Cassiopeia. Andromeda means “ruler of men”.

Sirius is the brightest star system in Earth’s night sky, located in the constellation Canis Majoris. Sirius means “glowing”.  

[shiftingsandcastles]

"I was given the bullet points, yeah…" Amelia sighed, "Still trying to process it all, though." She rubbed the back of her neck and frowned thoughtfully; the dead appeared to be rising in droves. What was the connection? Those same questions again presented themselves to her, mocking her inability to answer them. Who would have the power to do something like this? How? Why? How were they choosing who was returning? Were they choosing them at all? Was there a specific target being raised and the rest of them simply a diversion?

Would Edgar..? Nope. She shut down that line of thinking and focused on Andromeda again. “I’m sorry you lost her, even if it ended up being temporary. She’s alright? Or, as alright as it’s possible to be given the circumstances?”

[perardua-ad-astra]

Teddy was tugging at her hand, and she released his, knowing that even if he wandered, his brightly-colored hair would be beacon enough to indicate his location.

"She...no, unfortunately, she's not doing as well as one might hope." Andromeda had no idea how to explain the complications of Dora's life. "Her husband--Remus Lupin--has not returned yet. He died in the battle as well. And Teddy..." She glanced around, ensuring he was not listening (Teddy was staring at the list of ice creams available at the shop next to where they were standing) before continuing. "Teddy was barely days old when she died. He doesn't remember her at all, and he's only five--he can't understand something like this."

[stagspirited]

ι ωαѕ ℓσѕт, вυт ησω αм ƒσυη∂. | regulus * andromeda

[stagspirited]

       He didn’t want to eat. He knew that. The nurses knew that. It was plain to see that Regulus would not eat. He could possibly pick at it at least to sustain him. But could he even die again? It wasn’t as if he were about to find out. So he looked at the food from over his book as if it were about to eat him instead. Often, he wondered if they’d try to poison him. It wouldn’t be a shock to him if they did. He was some sort of freak now.

      Visitors were so rare for Regulus at the moment, yet so frequent to the ward .. and when he heard someone was coming in, Regulus stiffened considerably. Fight or flight? He’d fly out of this room faster than on a broom (which for him, was very fast, considering he was Seeker in his youth.) Regulus peered around the Healer and saw someone he didn’t recognize.. yet did. There was no mistaking family. He knew. It was different, she was older, and much more wise.. but it was his cousin. The feeling of not feeling anything was becoming less and less, especially seeing people from the past. Andromeda was from the past and future. And God, he missed her more than anyone, other than Sirius. For a moment, he felt safe. He felt so safe and wanted. Maybe she’d want him. Maybe she’d even hug him. Maybe he had a friend in the world, other than his House Elf.       It took him all but two second after ‘do you remember me?’ to make a bee-line to her arms and collapse against her. His words frantically fell from chapped lips. Things like ‘I love you, I missed you, I’m so sorry. I’m so, so sorry.’ They repeated until the sobs wracked him and only every other word came out. What if she didn’t even want him to touch her? She may have been a disowned blood traitor, but he was a traitor and a former Death Eater. What was worse? A sin was a sin, wasn’t it?         ❛    i’m so sorry, s-sorry.                                 you m-must hate m-me.  ❜

[perardua-ad-astra]

The relief that washed over her when Regulus hurtled at her and fell into her embrace was nearly as sweet as it had been when Nymphadora had done the same earlier in the month. This time, she had no doubts that this boy was her cousin. She was surprised, of course, by his immediate acceptance of her and the sobbed apologies, but she had heard that he'd turned his back on the Death Eaters and, at the time, Andromeda had wished he'd come to her--I could have protected you.

She held him as a mother would her son, cradling him in her arms with one hand on the back of his head and one firmly around his back. The junior Healer, who hadn't left the room yet, looked startled, quickly edging out as soon as Andromeda nodded at him to indicate that she'd be fine now. Gently, she guided Regulus back to the bed, afraid he might collapse if left standing upright too long in the state he was in.

"I couldn't hate you," she told him honestly. "Never once did I hate you--and how could I now, when you're here and safe after all this time?" Tears were in her eyes, too, but she didn't bother to wipe them away. "Even seeing you and touching you, I can hardly believe it." She hadn't let him go, still holding him against her like if she released him, he'd vanish again. "No, Regulus, I will always love you and forgive you for everything." In a million years, she never believed she would get the chance to tell her cousin these thoughts.

[stagspirited]

ι ωαѕ ℓσѕт, вυт ησω αм ƒσυη∂. | open.

    After the initial shock, of being alive and .. well enough, Regulus found himself at St. Mungo’s. He doubted anyone would care as much as Kreacher had about his return, but he had hopes at least someone would remember him and come visit. Or take him home. He prayed someone would take him anywhere but this place. Regulus had gathered that these people had to be psychotic. They were not his sort of people, that was for sure. He barely slept. Didn’t eat. They’d bandaged his arms and put him on suicide watch — a real joke. He’d already done that one. It wouldn’t be as fun the second time, he was sure.        Sitting on the bed, which smelled like cleaning alcohol and stale laundry detergent, Regulus stared at the bandage which covered his left forearm. It was an embarrassment now. It wasn’t honor. It was a mistake he’d tried to get rid of before his death. It became a deep, bloody wound —— all mental, emotional, and physical now. Regulus sighed softly and made note not to pick at it. It would do no good now. It’d just have t heal and he’d have to get used to the scar. Or scars. He had a few too many, in his opinion. He wasn’t … handsome to begin with, but he certainly didn’t feel it now. Sirius had always been the handsome one. He had softer, more beautiful features. But Sirius was gorgeous, more angled, and far more attractive. Though, being a little older and refusing to look at oneself, Regulus did not realize he looked more like Sirius than he thought. Any longer hair and one may end up confused. It could even be a painful reminder of youth for anyone who loved Sirius… or wanted to remember.        The nurses there seemed to enjoy his modesty and innocent qualities.. so they kept him as long as he’d allow them to baby him.. Which had been this entire time. Regulus had learned his house no longer belonged to the family, so he was hesitant to go back. It was his, and he knew, but so many things had changed.. he was no longer the same as he was years ago. Even then, he wasn’t as the rest of his family was.          There were no familiar faces.. there were no comforting words. Only confusion, strangers, and ‘you’ll be fine, Mr. Black’. It didn’t stop the nightmares. It didn’t stop the shaking. He just wanted to go home.          So, by himself, he started read. And read. And was halfway through a book when lunch decided to show up, along with his first visitor.

[perardua-ad-astra]

News about who had been Resurrected was still filtering through official channels. The majority of those magical beings brought back to life were not handled it well, and the wards of St. Mungo's was overwhelmed with hysterical people who were in the process of being identified by old newspaper obituaries. Nobody knew which ones had died in the first war or the second; age never helped distinguish the formerly deceased, since there were victims of all ages in both wars. Those returning from the first war, which had sustained many more casualties and lasted longer, were harder to recognize than the first--and harder to contact families who may, also, be dead by then.

Despite her family's attempts to wipe her from their records, Andromeda was still legally a child of Druella and Cygnus Black, legally cousin to Regulus and Sirius, and she had finally been tracked down to be informed: Your cousin, Regulus Black, has been reanimated.

Why hadn't she considered Regulus? Sirius, certainly, she'd wondered where he was if he had returned. But Regulus--dear sweet Regulus whom she had never believed was as awful as the rest of them and knew deep in her heart that he'd suffered for that. The boy cousin whose reported death she'd cried over for days, leaving a confused Dora patting her arm when she broke down over breakfast. Regulus was back.

The distinctions between Death Eater and blood traitor no longer crossed her mind. Andromeda secured a babysitter for Teddy (Nymphadora was out with Charlie--again) and rushed to St. Mungo's, accidentally putting her shoes on the wrong feet at first in her distraction.

Visitors had to go through a screening process. Proof of identity, a search, a scan of her wand and confirmation that she only held one and was not smuggling another to the patient. Andromeda waited impatiently, trying to see past them toward where the cleared visitors were being escorted. Soon, she was among them, a cheery-looking junior Healer with bags under his eyes and a twitchy demeanor showing her toward the room where her cousin would be. There was some droning instructions he had to give her before he showed her in, but Andromeda barely listened--she'd been dealing with her daughter long enough now to not need a primer in resurrection coping mechanisms. Finally, they halted and the Healer preceded her inside; Andromeda resisted the urge to push him aside.

Merlin, he looked older than she'd last seen him--because the last time she'd seen him had been years before his death. He'd been a child then, and now she still saw those innocent features on a face that had begun to fill out into something more like an adult's visage. "Regulus," she breathed, checking herself before she ran forward to him. He had been dead for decades, and before even that he hadn't seen her since she was eighteen. Andromeda hesitated, watching him for signs of confusion, fear, or anger. "It's Andromeda, your cousin--do you remember me?" For the first time since hearing of his return, Andromeda was fearful that her cousin might still retain his family's opinion of her and deny their relation. Did Regulus still think of her as a disowned blood traitor?

[quoted-books]

As I let go of the past, the past let go of me.

Keith Donohue, The Stolen Child (via quoted-books)

[shiftingsandcastles]

A faint blush lit her cheeks but she answered honestly. “I’ve never been great at sitting still. Add to that the fact that my house is sort of….destroyed and there’s really no point in remaining there,” she replied with a shrug. 

The word gran brought a smile to Amelia’s face and she watched the two interact feeling the first sense that things had truly changed. The boy was adorable and clearly took after his mother, the penchant for brightly colored hair a dead give away. While she had no idea who Tonks had ended up with, she was pleased that the other woman had found someone. Amelia had made it a point to know everyone in her department and had always liked the young Auror. Upon hearing that she too had “come back” the smile faded slightly. 

"Tonks— I mean, Nymphadora, too?” 

[perardua-ad-astra]

Andromeda's heart twinged a little; it was never easy to inform anyone that someone they had loved had died in the war. With so many people returning, these experiences were endured anew. Still, she was slightly amused at hearing her daughter called Tonks by someone who didn't know that Dora had a new last name.

"Five years ago," she answered, still keeping her voice low in case anyone was listening in. "At the Battle of Hogwarts--have you been told of that, yet?" She paused, uncertain how much Amelia needed to be informed of. "She is...back, now, too."

[shiftingsandcastles]

Amelia turned at the sound of her name, freezing for a moment. She’d been told of the Ministry’s official position on the revenants, but she wasn’t one to hide or skulk about. Turning toward the voice she was a bit relieved by the familiar face. Seven years was a long time, but she still knew to whom she was speaking. The child was a mystery, but perhaps the Tonks’s had finally conceived again.

"Andromeda. It’s, uh, good to see you," she answered, tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear. She was aware of how she must look - scraggly, bedraggled, and in desperate need of a shower, but that was hardly the most shocking thing about her. "Back? Not long….less than twenty-four hours."

[perardua-ad-astra]

Fearfully but hiding her concern, Andromeda glanced around to ensure nobody else had noticed the two. "Wandering the city already?" she asked, trying to keep her tone light. "Were you heading anywhere in particular?"

Teddy, annoyed at the delay, tugged at her hand. "Gran, who's that?" He'd taken advantage of her distraction and turned his hair turquoise again (he'd left the house with red hair, and she'd instructed him to keep it that color until they came home). Andromeda glanced down at him, too distracted to notice the hair color, and then back at Amelia--well, it couldn't be any harder than explaining Nymphadora's return, could it?

"This is Miss Bones. She's like your mum--um, like Dora--she came back after being gone a long time." Andromeda winced at her poor explanation, but Teddy just said "oh" and gave Amelia a solemn look.

[shiftingsandcastles]

City sure has changed in the last seven years… 

[perardua-ad-astra]

The city was full of ghosts, too. "Amelia?" Andromeda nearly dropped her bag and grabbed Teddy's hand (he whined). How could Amelia Bones be wandering the city as if she had nothing to fear. "Salazar's beard--how long have you been back?" One of these days, these resurrected people were going to give her a heart attack.

[ofxjeans]

Welcome Back || Lily and Andromeda

The house reeked of mildew and decay, which was to be expected given the current state of it. With the right side of its roof completely blown to bits, it was a wonder anything in the nursery had survived at all. But there it was, the crib in the place she’d left it. The mat was torn to bits and the mobile had lost all but one of its owls, but if she concentrated hard enough it was almost as if nothing had changed at all. It nearly made her curious enough to search the remainder of the house for things she and James had hidden away, but Lily wasn’t sure her heart was capable of dealing with all of those memories right now. Seeing her son’s nursery in such a state was almost more than she could bear, but where else was she meant to go? This was her home — or rather, it had been. Now, it was nothing more than a reminder of everything she’d lost. Though, Lily Potter had every intention of getting it all back.

After a few moments spent testing the wood beneath her feet for any dry rot — the last thing she needed was to lose her new life because of a fall — Lily carefully made her way towards the crib. There was something inside that had caught her eye, something she couldn’t quite distinguish from the doorway. Upon leaning over the nearly destroyed crib, her eyes zeroed in on the object and she let out a slow sigh. “Oh Harry,” she muttered under her breath as she picked up the stuffed rabbit. It was barely holding itself together, one of its legs hanging haphazardly by a single thread, but even with the dark stains and obvious wear, it was entirely recognizable to her. The sight alone had Lily’s chest seizing up painfully and her eyes stinging with tears she refused to shed. She still wasn’t entirely certain what had taken place after her final stand against the Dark Lord, but given she’d woken up to a grave stone only depicting the names of she and her husband, Lily held out hope that somehow her little boy had made it through. 

Her thoughts were cut short suddenly as a board creaked behind her. Without so much as a pause, Lily reached into her pocket to grab her wand — which had thankfully been on her when she’d awoken — and turned on her heels. The sudden motion sent the stuffed animal falling to the ground, but she could mend it later. For now, she had more pressing things to attend to. “I’m giving you one chance to show yourself before I start firing off hexes.” 

[perardua-ad-astra]

She hadn't wanted to leave Nymphadora alone in the house, but days had passed and Dora was restless. It was safe, now, to smuggle her out with Harry or Charlie and allow her to spend more time in the world--catching up with friends, finding out what had happened in the years she'd been gone. Thank Merlin, nobody was panicking yet about her return, and Andromeda had not received any questions from neighbors about her new guest. Perhaps they knew, and they were being careful; perhaps they didn't notice or didn't care.

Nymphadora was at the Weasley's, and Andromeda took this time while Teddy was not under her supervision to go somewhere she hadn't visited since the first war had ended. She knew Harry was not going to look--but someone had to. Someone had to find out if James and Lily Potter were back from the dead, and someone had to make sure they didn't end up locked up or targeted by the same people who were killing others in the area.

Andromeda was not one for disguising herself, but she chose clothing that wasn't normal for her and wore sunglasses to cover most of her face. Oddly, the street with its broken house was all but empty; Godric's Hollow was not one to disturb the peace. Andromeda took a deep breath as she entered the house, trying not to touch the mildewed wood and stepping lightly on the decaying floorboards. It didn't take long for her to confirm that nobody had been in this house in decades, but something pulled her to climb the stairs (gingerly holding the rail, hoping it would not give way under her weight) and move toward where she knew Lily had died and Harry had survived.

The hall was dark as she stepped into the doorway, and in the space of a half-second Andromeda saw and was threatened by a ghost.

She took a sharp breath. Alive, just as she was in the days before she died. She had never known Lily Evans--now Potter--intimately, but her cousin Sirius has often brought the Marauders around to play with Dora. She looks older, though she hasn't aged.

Andromeda stepped forward into the light, pushing back the hood of her cloak so it pooled around her neck and caught on her hair behind her head. She held her hands out, palms upward, to show that she was not armed. "My name is Andromeda Tonks, once Andromeda Black," she said, warily watching the other woman's wand tip. "You once played with my daughter, Nymphadora, who always made her hair red when you were around because she liked yours so much." She hoped the identification was enough to prove to Lily who she was, even though she was twenty years older than she had been when last she saw the redhead.