引きこもりちゃん

Hello, I am the Grim Reaper. Content can be NSFW as I do reblog violence, gore, and sexually explicit images. No minors please. If I find out you are under 18, I will block you.

[princessdurian]

Recovering from food poisoning

Still fly tho

Also at the pathology department in a hospital putting labels on specimens. It says I’m a lab tech as my title. It’s not. It’s just glorified secretary work with where they still treat me poorly. Been working there for two months, but I’m starting a new job in three weeks because I hate my current place.

I’ll be a medical lab technician at a different clinic. It’s a field I’ve never worked in before so I’m nervous because im technically not certified, but they’re making exceptions for people who have a biology related degree. I’m scared yet also looking forward to doing actual lab work again. The stakes are higher tho because it’s actual patient care.

[princessdurian]

Still no job promises.

Had a three day mental breakdown.

Got a mullet.

I’m okay now!

[princessdurian]

I finally weigh enough to donate plasma!!!

LFG IM BROKE AFFF

[princessdurian]

I never doubted him that the fan worked??? Hey chat, do you think I should go into a stranger’s home and have my kidneys stolen?

[fashion-runways]

MALYAROVA OLGA Dress 2025 if you want to support this blog consider donating to: ko-fi.com/fashionrunways

[elodieunderglass]

You know when you see something and think: I could launch a thousand ships wearing this

[cat-appreciator]

Oh wow, that bodice. Dang.

[princessdurian]

Unemployed without any source of income. I have two masters in psychobiology and research positions asking for a bachelors with criteria I 100% meet are rejecting me. I finally got approved for Medicaid but that soon will probably be stripped away. SNAPs too. I’m stuck in a new lease for one year because I had signed before the whole ordeal with my lab that lead me to getting bullied out of my PhD program/my only source of income. The financial stress has started to take a physical toll on me to the point I’m starting to vomit, eat less, and lose weight. I’m honestly pretty scared for my financial, mental, and physical well-being.

I thought I’d be okay by the time I turned 30. I was fine for a little bit. I have been feeling envious of the people around me who come from well-off families. What I’ve learned from my last three years here is that being smart or kind isn’t enough to survive a system that actively tries to gatekeep success from people like me. I can’t lie about not feeling suicidal again. Especially in the current political climate. I also never thought I had to worry about my parents being deported either.

My 20s was me building a future just for 30 year old me to get fucked and start from scratch again. I’m hoping I remain kind and warm throughout this struggle. It’s really hard not to feel bitter in moments.

One good thing I have going on for me is that I’m aging well. Hopefully that counts for something.

[princessdurian]

I made a formal complaint about the work place harassment I’ve been experiencing in my lab.

The department chair told me to hold on leaving completely and to think about taking a leave of absence first. I basically burnt the bridge with my lab, but I’m still encouraged to come back and find a new one if possible.

[vewn]

Clinging

[princessdurian]

Pixie cut. Too old to be a manic pixie dream girl. It’s just manic now.

[princessdurian]

I’m officially 30 years old!!!!!

Yesterday I told my advisor I’m quitting the PhD. I’ll be unemployed in July. Let’s see how things in 2025 go. Things are uncertain and scary, but I haven’t felt this free in a long time.

[sillyseacreature]

He is indeed a guy

[princessdurian]

You ever been so in love with someone that you’d buy them one of those 9/11 Afghan rugs?

Cuz it’s a nice feeling

[princessdurian]

Chopped my hair off as I’m getting through my period of grief. I’m anxious about my future as I’ll be unemployed/no longer be pursuing my PhD soon.

[princessdurian]

Had a mental breakdown and deciding to quit my PhD program. It feels freeing. I’m scared of what will happen next. I’ll be considered unemployed but I won’t get unemployment because I’m technically a student and not an employee with the university. I’ll lose my insurance and my stipend/salary.

I still love science and research. However, academia is extremely toxic and terrible for both my physical and mental health. It’s unfortunate because education is so important, but it’s so heavily gate kept that accessibility to the public is meant to be limited. I’m so tired and scared.

[chabochi]

Jhankri (Nepalese Shaman) necklace made from snake vertebrae

[princessdurian]

A local artist/friend of friends is shooting tintype photos as a side gig. I’m gifting the physical tintype to my parents as a Christmas gift.

I generally hate photos taken of me by other people, but I think he tends to portrays people as they are rather than how they want to be perceived. I feel like the photo actually conveys how I feel about myself/my life. I can tell I’ve aged significantly. The difficulties I’ve been struggling with this year is very apparent on my face. I look haggard, fatigued, and demoralized. However, I accept all of that as who I am. It feels good to admit it. That’s why I feel beautiful as I am, and I think the photographer captures that very well. I’m saying this as an admirer of his work rather than it being my portrait, but it’s a very beautiful piece. I’m grateful that I was able to have a photo taken by him.

[zeekayart]