𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐓𝐎 𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐄 𝐌𝐄
you and chris have always hated each other. but who knew hate sex would feel so good?
warnings ︖ hate sex insulting during sex porn w/ plot names like “bitch” rough, car sex chris becomes more bearable
𝐓𝐇𝐄 party was already loud by the time you got there. music shook through the floorboards hard enough to rattle the cheap framed pictures hanging crooked on the walls, bodies packed shoulder-to-shoulder in humid rooms smelling like vodka and smoke and somebody’s vanilla perfume. katie was halfway through her drink before you’d even gotten through the front door.
“you’re late.”
“you texted me twelve minutes ago.”
“and yet.”
you rolled your eyes, tugging your jacket tighter around yourself as people shoved past. somewhere upstairs, someone screamed loud enough to make you flinch. “oh, great,” katie muttered. you didn’t even have to turn around. chris.
you knew his footsteps in the same way people recognized songs they hated from the first note alone. he brushed past your shoulder on purpose, not enough to move you, just enough to annoy you. “didn’t know they were letting just anyone in now,” he said casually.
you looked at him slowly. black hoodie, backwards cap, that same irritatingly calm expression like he existed purely to test your patience. “you came, didn’t you?” nick barked out a laugh from somewhere behind him.
“ohhh, there she is.” matt sighed immediately. “can we not start?”
“we didn’t,” you said at the same time chris said, “she did.” nick pointed between you both dramatically. “that. that’s exactly the shit i’m talking about.”
chris grabbed a beer from the counter without looking away from you. “you talk about me a lot for someone who supposedly hates me.” you scoffed. “trust me, christopher, if i talked about you as much as you think i do, i’d have killed myself by now.”
nick nearly folded over laughing. matt muttered, “jesus christ.”chris just smirked. that smug, awful smirk that made you want to throw your drink at him. “you practiced that one in the mirror?”
“actually, yeah,” you said. “katie held cue cards.” katie raised her hand solemnly. “it’s true.” nick wiped at his eyes dramatically. “you guys are literally divorced.”
“we’d have to like each other first,” you snapped. something flickered across chris’s face. brief. gone too quickly to name. then he took a sip from his beer and leaned casually against the counter.
“you’re in a good mood tonight.”
“i usually am before you show up.”
“ouch,” nick whispered. matt grabbed his shoulder. “come on.”
“no, no, hold on,” nick said excitedly. “i wanna see where this goes.”
“you need hobbies,” you told him. “i have hobbies. this is one of them.” chris snorted quietly into his drink. you hated that sound too.
an hour later, you were sitting cross-legged on the arm of somebody’s couch while katie talked about one of her classes, only half listening because chris was across the room. again. always somehow across the room.
talking to some girl with curled hair and glossy lips perched against the kitchen counter. she laughed too hard at something he said, touching his arm like she already knew him. you looked away immediately. katie noticed.
“oh my god.”
“what?”
“you’re staring.”
“i literally wasn’t.”
“you literally were.” you grabbed your drink defensively. “i was looking at the kitchen.”
“the kitchen with chris in it?” you glared at her. katie leaned closer. “you know what i think?”
“no.”
“i think you two wanna kill each other sexually.” you nearly choked. “oh my god, shut up.”
“i’m serious.”
“that’s genuinely the worst thing you’ve ever said to me.” katie grinned into her cup.
across the room, chris looked over suddenly. your eyes met for half a second. then his gaze dropped deliberately to the guy sitting beside you. a guy who’d been flirting with you for the past ten minutes. you saw the exact moment chris’s jaw tightened. and because you were a horrible person, you leaned closer to the guy beside you. just enough.
the guy smiled immediately, encouraged. chris looked away first. satisfaction curled warm and ugly in your chest. katie stared at you. “oh, you’re insane.”
“shut up.”
“no, seriously. this is becoming psychological warfare.”
by midnight, you were tipsy enough to feel reckless.
the guy beside you (evan? ethan? something aggressively forgettable) had his hand resting against your knee while he talked. you barely heard him.
because chris had walked back into the room with the same girl from earlier. and this time her hand was tucked into his back pocket. your stomach twisted violently. pathetic. actually pathetic. katie saw your expression and physically cringed. “oh no.”
“what?”
“you care.”
“i do not.”
“you look like you’re about to commit a felony.”
before you could answer, chris looked directly at you. then, without breaking eye contact;
he kissed the girl. not sweetly. deliberately. your face went hot instantly. “oh, fuck him,” you muttered. katie blinked. “i think that’s what he wants, actually.” you stood up so fast your drink nearly spilled.
“where are you going?”
“to get another drink.”
“you hate beer.”
“i’ll learn.”
you shoved through the crowded kitchen, shoulder-checking chris hard enough to make the girl stumble. “watch it,” he said sharply. you turned. “sorry. didn’t realize diseases could stand upright now.” the girl looked horrified. nick, from the hallway: “oh my god.” chris laughed once in disbelief. “you’re unbelievable.”
“and yet you keep looking at me.” that hit. you saw it land. the girl awkwardly excused herself almost immediately. smart woman. chris stared at you after she left, expression darker now.
“you ever think maybe the reason nobody dates you for long is because you’re fucking exhausting?” the words hit harder than they should have. your face changed before you could stop it. chris noticed immediately. and for one second he looked guilty. then your anger came rushing back twice as hard.
“you know what?” you said quietly. “at least people date me because they actually like me. not because they think you’re hot enough to compensate for your personality.” nick actually covered his mouth. matt muttered, “jesus fucking christ.” chris stepped closer.
“careful.”
“or what?”
the kitchen had gone quieter around you both now. not silent. just that subtle shift where people realized something real was happening. chris’s voice lowered. “you don’t wanna do this tonight.” you laughed sharply. “you think i’m scared of you?”
“no,” he said. “i think you like this too much.” something ugly twisted in your chest. because maybe he was right. and you hated that he knew it.
you shoved past him hard enough to knock his shoulder. “move.” chris caught your wrist before you got two feet. instantly, the room stilled. not dramatically. just enough. your pulse jumped violently. “let go,” you said.
his fingers loosened immediately. but neither of you moved. nick looked between you both slowly. “…okay, now this is getting weird.” matt grabbed his beer. “i’m leaving before one of them commits manslaughter.”
you yanked your arm back and stormed toward the front door before chris could say another word. cold air hit your face hard outside. your heartbeat still felt uneven. you barely made it down the porch steps before the door slammed open behind you.
of course. “seriously?” you snapped without turning around. “you gonna cry because i hurt your feelings?” you spun around instantly. “fuck you.” chris laughed humorlessly. “there she is.” rain had started lightly, cold droplets catching in his hair and the collar of his hoodie.
“you think everything’s a joke,” you said. “and you think everything’s about you.”
“oh my god, you are such an asshole.”
“you’re the one who started acting insane because i kissed somebody.” you stared at him. then laughed once, disbelieving.
“you are unbelievably self-absorbed.”
“you were staring at me all night.”
“you were staring at me first.”
“that’s because you were draped all over that guy like you were auditioning for a frat party porno.” your mouth fell open. “oh, okay, so you were jealous.” chris stepped closer immediately. “i was not jealous.”
“right,” you said. “and i’m the fucking pope.” rain dampened your sleeves now, cold against your skin. chris looked angry. not normal-annoyed angry. something tighter. meaner. “you know what your problem is?” he said. you laughed sharply. “please enlighten me.”
“you need attention from every person in the room or you start losing your mind.” the words landed exactly where he intended them to. you felt it. and because you were furious, you suddenly wanted to hurt him back just as badly. you stepped closer too.
“at least i can admit i want attention,” you said quietly. “you act like you’re above everybody else because you’re terrified people might realize you actually care.” chris’s jaw tightened. “there’s nothing about you worth caring about.” that should’ve ended it. honestly, it should have.
instead your chest tightened painfully. because he sounded like he meant it. the rain came down harder now. you should leave. you knew you should. instead you said, “then why are you out here?” silence. chris looked at you for a long moment. water dripped from the edge of his cap.
“you look at me like you wanna kill me.” your heartbeat stuttered. “maybe i do.” his eyes dropped briefly to your mouth. “that’s not what it looks like.” and suddenly the air felt wrong. too close. too warm despite the rain.
you hated him. actually hated him. but you knew exactly how his hands felt around your wrist now. you knew the shape of his mouth when he got angry. you knew every look he made before he spoke. something shifted between you both. dangerous. stupid.
chris kissed you like he was trying to win something. rough. immediate. angry enough to make your pulse spike. you kissed him back just as hard. like a fucking idiot.
you grabbed his hoodie, pulling him closer instead of pushing away. rain soaked through your clothes, cold against your skin, but his mouth was hot and relentless, and you matched him kiss for kiss, bite for bite, like you could punish each other into forgetting every other person who'd ever touched either of you. but god, you hated him. you hated his cocky demeanor, his stupid face. everything about him.
he gripped your jaw, tilting your face up to kiss you deeper, like he knew exactly how much you hated him. like he enjoyed it. his other hand gripped your hip, pulling you flush against him, and you hated him even more when you felt how hard he was already.
you both pulled back and looked at each other for a second, before wordlessly tumbling into his car. you fumbled with the door handle, laughing breathlessly as the rain soaked your hair. he shoved you inside first, then leaned over you to shut the door, hands braced on either side of your head. his eyes were dark, lips swollen, shirt clinging to his chest. neither of you said a word. you just pulled him down on top of you.
his weight pressed you back against the seat, one hand tangling in your wet hair while the other gripped your thigh and pulled it up around his hip. he kissed you aggressively, like he was trying to devour you. His voice was rough against your mouth when he finally spoke. "this changes nothing," he growled, his hand sliding under your soaked shirt, rough and possessive. "you’re still exhausting."
"that’s fine," you snapped back, yanking his hoodie up. "you’re still an asshole." neither of you were looking at each other now, just tearing at clothes in the dark, soaked and furious, using each other.
he bit down hard on your neck, making you gasp, his fingers digging into your hip hard enough to bruise. "shut the fuck up," he muttered against your skin, shoving your skirt up impatiently. "only doing this because you're annoying."
"only doing this because you're desperate," you shot back, ripping his belt buckle open with trembling, wet hands.
he choked out a laugh, breath hot against your throat, the sound so close to genuine amusement that it pissed you off even more. he pulled back, grabbing your chin roughly and making you meet his eyes. "hate you," he said, not moving, just holding you there, rainwater dripping from his hair onto your face.
"same,"
then his head disappeared under your soaked shirt and his mouth closed over your breast, sucking hard enough to leave a mark. you arched against him, nails scraping down his back, not caring if you left welts. this wasn't about pleasure.
he unzipped his pants fast, not bothering to pull them down, just shoving fabric aside.
"don't fucking expect anything nice," he warned, his voice rough and breathless. he lined himself up and shoved in, not giving you a chance to adjust, forcing a choked gasp from your throat. you dug your heels into his lower back, raking your nails down his shoulders, biting back a whimper.
"i wouldn't dream of it,"
he moved hard and fast, no rhythm, just furious, angry thrusts that had the car rocking slightly. each one drove a choked sound from your throat that you tried desperately to swallow. his hand fisted in your hair, pulling your head back, exposing your throat where he bit down again. "you started this," he grunted against your skin.
"you escalated it," you gasped, your hands gripping his shoulders hard enough to leave crescent-shaped indents in his skin. the angle was brutal, the seat handle digging into your spine, but you didn't tell him to stop. you urged him on, meeting his anger with your own, hips bucking up to take him deeper. "fuck you."
"i’m trying to,"
he pulled out abruptly, making you whimper at the sudden emptiness, before slamming back in with brutal force. "fucking bitch," he muttered, his hand leaving your hair to wrap around your throat, applying gentle pressure. his eyes met yours, both of you breathing heavily, faces inches apart.
"asshole," you choked out, tilting your head back to give him better access to your throat. your legs wrapped tighter around his waist, heels digging into his lower back. you hated him. you hated this. you hated how good it felt.
he squeezed your throat just enough to make your vision blur, his hips snapping into yours ruthlessly. "still hate me?" he taunted, his breath ragged against your mouth. he didn't wait for an answer, hitting a spot that made your back bow off the seat, forcing a broken moan from your lips. "fucking answer me."
"yes,"
"still an asshole?" he challenged, his thumb pressing hard against your pulse point where it was racing. his voice dropped lower, almost... gentle. almost. "even when i'm fucking you so good you're seeing stars?" he thrust deep and rolled his hips, grinding against a sensitive spot.
"especially then," you managed to gasp, your nails raking down his back hard enough to draw blood. "you're insufferable." your eyes rolled back, body betraying you as he hit that spot again, pleasure exploding so sharp it bordered on pain. "don't stop- don't you fucking dare stop."
"wouldn't dream of it," he mocked, his grip on your throat loosening just slightly, but his other hand moved down to your hip, fingers digging into your skin as he used you mercilessly. the car creaked, seatbelt dangling, both of you soaked and swearing at each other between rough, punishing thrusts.
he felt you clench around him and slowed, pulling out almost all the way before shoving back in deep. "not yet," he said low against your ear, his voice thick with lust. "you don't get to come until i tell you to."
"you—" you started, but a particularly hard thrust stole the words from your mouth.
he laughed, the sound vibrating through his chest against yours. "what? you were going to argue?" he snapped his hips forward again, over and over, relentless. "thought so." your walls clenched around him, your whole body trembling, desperate and furious and so close. "chris—"
"shut up," he commanded, his voice rough and unyielding. he sped up, his movements becoming almost violent as he chased his own release. "don’t fucking say my name like that."
“you’re—“ another brutal thrust cut you off. “you're coming first,” he warned, his thumb pressing hard against your clit, rubbing in rough circles. it wasn't gentle or tender, it was designed to overwhelm you completely. “and you're going to come on this cock.” you threw your head back, a sobbing moan escaping you as he worked you relentlessly.
you vision went white, your body locking up as the orgasm tore through you violently. you nearly screamed his name, your back arching off the seat, legs shaking uncontrollably around his waist. he didn't stop, fucking you through it.
“thaaaat’s it,” he gritted out, his rhythm faltering. “fucking take it.”
"fuck, you're beautiful." he groaned, his face contorting as he finally let go, coming deep inside you with a string of curses. his hips jerked erratically, burying himself as deep as possible as he rode out his orgasm. he collapsed against you, both of you soaked, sweating, and struggling to catch your breath. for a long moment, the only sounds were the rain drumming on the roof of the car and your ragged gasps for air. he dropped his forehead against your shoulder.
he stayed like that for a moment, not moving, not speaking. then he slowly pulled out, a shiver running through your body at the sudden emptiness. he looked down at you, his expression unreadable. he leaned down, pressing a rough kiss to your lips before pulling away. "don’t hate me too much," he murmured against your mouth, his voice softer than before.
he shifted back onto his own seat, adjusting his wet clothes with a grimace. the silence between you was heavy, charged with everything that had just happened. you were still breathing hard, legs trembling slightly as you sat there, feeling his release drip out of you. he cleared his throat, breaking the tense silence. "that was..." he trailed off, running a hand through his hair. "fuck." he glanced over at you, taking in your flushed skin, disheveled hair, and rumpled clothes.
"you okay?" he asked, his tone surprisingly gentle. he reached over and grabbed a towel from the backseat, handing it to you without meeting your eyes. you took it silently, using it to clean up between your legs before wiping down your arms and face. the rain was still pouring outside.
he watched you silently, his expression thoughtful. "we’re not gonna talk about that, are we?" he asked softly, already knowing the answer. you shook your head silently. he nodded, understanding. "alright." he dropped the subject, pulling back on his seatbelt carefully. "you hungry?"
you didn’t answer for a second, but then you nodded. “katie might be wondering where i am, though.” you said quietly, throat burning.
he nodded, starting the car back up. "i'll drive you home. we'll grab some food on the way." he didn't press for more, for which you were grateful. the rest of the drive was mostly silent, only the sound of the rain and the radio playing some forgotten song. when he pulled up to your house, he handed you a bag of food he'd grabbed.
"tell katie i said hi," he said as you reached for the door handle. you paused, looking back at him over your shoulder. his expression was carefully neutral, giving nothing away about what had just happened between you two in the backseat of his car.
"i will," you said softly before getting out, the rain immediately soaking your hair and clothes. you stood there for a moment, watching as he drove away before turning and walking into the house. katie was in the kitchen, eating a bowl of ice cream. she looked up as you entered.
"where have you been?" she asked, her spoon pausing halfway to her mouth. "you're soaked." her gaze raked over you critically, taking in your damp hair, rumpled clothes, and the bag of food in your hand. something in her expression shifted, a knowing look entering her eyes.
"i was with chris," you admitted quietly, shutting the door behind you and leaning against it. katie's spoon clattered into her bowl at the mention of his name. "and before you ask," you said, holding up a hand to forestall any immediate questions, "no." you paused.
"i’m not talking about it." you walked past her into the living room, heading for the stairs. "i'm going to shower. food's in the bag." she sat there, stunned, watching you go. from the kitchen, you heard her murmur something under her breath that sounded suspiciously like, "holy shit."
𝐃𝐘𝐋𝐀𝐍'𝐒 𝐓𝐈𝐃𝐁𝐈𝐓𝐒: wait this kinda make me sad
holyyyy fuckkkk
