⛓

i’m 29 and i’m sorry if you’re reading this

[proletarikat]

my cat came home at 3am with a completely degloved foot. he had surgery and is now cutting about with an old sock taped to his leg that was given to me in that conservative shopping mall in zeytinburnu.

[proletarikat]

you 🆗❓🤨

[proletarikat]

i got real flu and haven’t been out of bed since sunday. i feel so weak and uncomfortable. my two dogs haven’t left my side and im very worried about their orthopaedic health but it feels like my bones are grinding against one another in the most hideous fashion. i want to be completely alone but they are my two very best friends and my duty to them far outweighs any duty i have to myself

[proletarikat]

sleep paralysis demon

[proletarikat]

over it mate

[proletarikat]

although i don’t post a lot just FYI if you randomly stop posting and don’t tell me that you’re leaving i take it really personally and am wholeheartedly offended and outraged. thank u

[proletarikat]

he’s turkish but going back to germany and he’s not my lover or anything so i have no real reason to be so shipwrecked by this whole thing. maybe i just hate him for being an eu citizen and its pure envy and rage i do not know but i feel absolutely traumatised. i sense either he or i will die before we ever meet again and i have no idea why im being so dramatic

[proletarikat]

my guest of 35 days is leaving and i’m devastated. i genuinely feel these changes so acutely even though they were sort of an inconvenience to my life i am utterly jarred and gut wrenched by their departure and i had to have four days off work in the lead up to this as i just feel so sick it’s irrational

[proletarikat]

omg so i got home at 16.00 and said hos geldin to a guest in my house and RAN and stayed upstairs and now it’s 00.40 and it’s gone too far i’ll have to hide for his entire visit ugh

[proletarikat]

morality and honour only exist to stop poor people becoming rich

[proletarikat]

life is long and death even longer

[proletarikat]

me lookin at your posts in bed

[proletarikat]

i’m 30 now and i havent changed one bit since joining tumblr 15 years ago

[proletarikat]

4am and i’m downstairs on my sunken in sofa with a headache and backache, can’t go to sleep in bed because the kitten harasses me and licks my face which sends me into sensory overload but also hate being downstairs because spiders crawl over me and the window is open and i hate the noise but i can’t close it because i’d have to open the curtains and look out in order to do that i can’t cope with the adrenaline that would further exacerbate my headache. if i get up to go upstairs it means i have to turn off the light and walk through the kitchen and be faced with darkness behind me which i also can’t handle. i can’t psychologically deal with leaving the light on because id be in bed obsessing about the light knowing its alone and on and working hard in vain. so i stay here, paralysed, and i keep scrolling. do you feel me?

[proletarikat]

ok sooo many apo opinions from me but nobody wants to hear a dumb blonde talk about it rn just know i am waiting in the wings

[proletarikat]

literally told you about apo like four years ago, watch this little puppet boy confess and confess. only rojava has an inch of integrity. blessings to the families of all souls lost totally in vain.

[proletarikat]

a) take my medicine now and the nausea comes in the shower

b) enjoy my shower and take medicine after so i feel sick as hell at work all afternoon

[proletarikat]

i took it before my shower and then vomited violently a minute before i was about to leave for work, ruined my makeup and carefully pressed t-shirt and turned up looking like a trash doll 1984 domovenok kuzya