Provocative Words Of Wisdom & Folly @provocamama - Tumblr Blog

2 years ago 💞 I love this! Pure joy and love on her face ☺️ #bigsistersrule

I remember our last conversation 14 years ago. Dad had asked if I would object to him going off the 20 pills a day (AMA) that were keeping him alive for 5 years past his "expiration date"- but making him so miserable and sick in different ways, and taking so much money from him per month. I of course gave my blessing for him to set himself free. One week later I called him for advice (I was 20, on my own in Portland for the first time since college. I was making terrible decisions, I was in incredible pain still recovering from my teenage years in a DV relationship & I needed him to help me focus. He was so wonderful at that! He kept it real 😢) but he kept floating in and out of reality. He tried so hard and I could hear the struggle he was going through to try and be my dad and help me like always. It was the hardest conversation of my life. He did tell me that "the President of the Universe is in my house!" Which I guessed meant he was already going through the spiritual transition. Also "Ill see you when you dye your hair red." I thought it was nonsense at first but my friend was dyeing my hair brown the week after he passed, and 100% accidentally dyed my hair bright red! My father was an amazing man. He lived a full life in those 52 years! I was devastated when he passed. On the day I swear I felt it about to happen and rushed to the ocean. I sat there crying for about 5 minutes, and got the call just as a perfect little gray and "fishing boat green" lobster boat chugged alone out into the open water. I was sure he was saying goodbye to me. I also felt like someone had punched me in the stomach. Captain Jack Spargo didn't want us to see him at the end in the hospital, and I think that it happened as it was supposed to. Losing him nearly killed me though, no joke. It was the worst thing I could imagine at the time. I wasn't suicidal but I was reckless with my life. I didn't care, I didn't want to feel anything. Thank the Lord I made it to where I am today. Time goes on and files down the sharp edges but the wounds are always there. I know this was deep but I had to write this today. Thank you for taking the time to read it ❤️☺️🌅🖋 Happy Dads' Day

This is Jack at exactly 7 months old. Around then I made up a song about my love for him; that I will keep him safe and warm and that he will always be my baby boy. I did the same thing for my girls when they were little. It was so special 💕 I used to sing to him every night but lately he hasn't wanted me to. He's going to be 3 in October. He asked me to sing him our song tonight, and as I sang he looked at me with such love in his eyes...we both cried a little. He said softly as he looked away, "so nice Mommy...I cry...sing it again?" So I'm posting this because I NEVER want to forget it! Someday he won't want to be my baby because he will be a man, but that's too bad because he will always be my little guy 💙💙💙😢😢😌

❤️

I love this, because they are sweetly looking up to their big sister. They love her. So cute ☺️👏🏼💕

Hehe. This is awesome. HAPPY MOTHERS' DAY MOMS! We ALL have days like these! We also all know that we can't get sick or everything will fall apart ;) No breaks- but we secretly love every minute, don't we? This is my first Mother's Day married to Austin...He helps make it possible for me to be the best mom I can be, by making sure it's possible for me to stay at home so that I can focus on the kids- and him as well. It doesn't work for every family but it truly works for us. As I sit here drinking my coffee while Lily makes breakfast, I realize that I'm so lucky to have an amazing family that make me feel like every day is Mother's Day- and absolutely love my role as "Mom" 💕 I love you all! #happymothersday #thankful #loveispatient #nowsayimpretty #what #noidont

#what #noidont #thankful #nowsayimpretty #loveispatient #happymothersday

Happy Saint Patty's Day from a wee Irishman, who has been up since much before the crack o' dawn. Good thing he's cute and cuddly! 🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀 I believe I'm about 3/8 Irish, and Austin has a bunch of it in him too, so this little laddie is the real thing 😎

Stole the hubby's hat. Because, #Maine and although it is March it is still #freakingcold! I so love this picture because it shows Jack's dancing, mischievous eyes! He is my third child and by far the most difficult. I'm glad he wasn't my first! Hahaha. Just keeping him alive is a chore on some days! However he is my only son and I would never say that I regret him. I will say that with children that are especially taxing, it is so important to make time for one another as a couple. You are a team and teams celebrate victory with one another. 😆☺️😜😘💞

#freakingcold #maine

You could always have more... But you could also lose what you have now. What's more important? #appreciatethelittlethings #tomorrowcouldbetoolate #humblethyself ❤️💜💙

#tomorrowcouldbetoolate #appreciatethelittlethings #humblethyself

Children: The lesser humans

Please excuse my rambling: Doing some political reading as I relax during my "me-time". You know what gets me tonight? Conservatives that are pro-life, yet turn around and shame people for having too many children. Some of us like to have babies! It doesn't mean we are stupid, we just have different priorities!We like loud houses and the pitter-patter of little feet. We like to hear "Mommyyyy!" From more than one little voice. We choose to stay middle class so that we can raise our family without passing our kids off to someone else. You know what also gets me? People that openly hate kids. I have a friend that works with children every day. She once pointed out to me that if you really think about it, children are the most discriminated against. They have no voice. When they have an opinion, adults tend to think its cute, but do not take them seriously. Everything is too big: think public restrooms-The toilets are too tall, the sinks too high! Poor lil things can't even get their own soap. I've been following the Marcy's Diner situation. I am appalled at some of the comments left by people about children. Kids are people, not animals! You know what? Maybe the parents should have taken their toddler out of the diner. As a parent, I can tell you that we ALL make mistakes, especially with our firstborn children. However, I feel like children, unlike adults, are not permitted in our society to simply have a bad day. If they're grumpy, it's just not allowed; they need a time out. I'm not saying that we shouldn't teach our children how to behave in public. I just feel that we should give them a chance to HAVE negative feelings. Not reward them per say, just to acknowledge being upset or angry as normal! Teaching them to bottle everything up is wrong, on so many levels. We were all toddlers once. I'm sure we have all made a scene at some point in our lives. This Marcy woman threw a bigger tantrum than the toddler, and she is being rewarded for it. What is wrong with this picture? Hmmmm. Mmm-kay I'm done debating this junk. Just please, for the love of God, don't rub it on my pancakes! #hypocrisy #pancakesatmarcys #tantrums #kidsrule #movingon #portlandmaine

❤️ My guys, watching the birds yesterday morning. Jack thinks the world of his daddy. ❤️

smokingsomethingwithrihanna

provocamama

This is gorgeous!

#realtalk

It is most refreshing to hear someone admit their faults. This is most difficult and still one of the best things to do when you are lost. In 12-step programs, the first step is admitting that you have a problem. There is a reason for this.

A behavior cannot be changed unless we can admit that it is hurting us and our loved ones. There is no excuse for abuse, but there are causes that should be addressed!

Many of us were brought up in a home or homes where there was abuse of some sort. Physical abuse is easier to put your finger on; to identify. Mental abuse is tremendously hard to figure out. Most times the person doing this to you either has no clue that they are wrong, because it was how his/her parents treated them, or he/she is very cunning so as not to be detected. Until it is too late and the damage is immense. Sometimes the traits of these abusers rub off on us, and the cycle continues in adulthood when we hurt people we love with what we learned as children.

We also carry our childhood hurts with us into adulthood, abusing ourselves by often trying to quash them with alcohol and/or drugs. It is much easier to forget than to forgive. Oh, the consequences, though! Forgiveness takes hard work and soul-searching. Forgetting creates a ticking time-bomb waiting to go off in the most inopportune of moments.

Then there comes the responsibility. When God tells you that you are the one that has to break this cycle. To stop the generations of hurt and make it right. To learn how to love in a healthy, non-judgmental way, and do away with pride and arrogance. You say to God and the inside of yourself, “Why me?” Then you understand that no matter what the reason is, you are happy to change the pattern in your family tree. You can be happy! Therefore, so can your children. You know what you must do.

Your steps become lighter, your dreams seem reachable! Alas, the better you do in life and the more happy and humble you become, the people that brought you down in the first place and made you feel that you weren’t good enough, they become resentful. This is how Haters are made! Don’t give up! You are on the right path.

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#words #literature #lit #lifestories #haters #growth #enlightenment

So this is the "real" me, sans makeup, no filter, right after I woke up. Scary, huh? I feel #brave for posting this. Okay ladies, it's your turn! 😉 I don't normally wear a ton of makeup- mainly just concealer to cover up the under-eye dark circles, smoky eye shadow, and mascara.

#brave

Easier said than done! However- so true. I try not to let the past define who I am. I try to learn from the mistakes that the older generation(s) seem to have been aslave to. I want our children to be free of unnecessary curses and negativity. Life is beautiful, and full of wonder! Our time here is so short. Too short to blame everyone else for our own shortcomings. Too short to let negative people and their projection and hypocrisy affect how we see ourselves. Instead of getting angry, and striking back, feel bad for them. ;))) can you tell I'm dealing with some sh%^? Hahaha. Anyway, I'm GOOD. The sun is out! 😊☀️🌞🌻

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