12 Traits of a True Dom
1. He declines being called Sir, Master or any other grandiose title from the start. Until a relationship has been agreed he knows heās a human being just like you, on the same level as you. He will owe you that respect and courtesy from the beginning. He declines being called ego-inflating names unless a dynamic has been explicitly agreed by both parties.
2. He looks after your interests. He will be on your side and will want you to be fulfilled in a relationship. He will be prepared to walk away from a relationship, if he believes your needs will be better met by somebody else. In fact he will be more than happy to introduce you to somebody else who will meet your needs better than him, even if that means he will lose you.
3. He doesnāt criticise other people, particularly other doms, behind their backs. He doesnāt feel threatened by other doms and doesnāt see them as competition. He doesnāt belittle or talk bad about other doms or tries to eliminate or undermine ācompetitorsā.
4. He doesnāt try to dominate the conversation or gratuitously lead a group onto something just to prove to everyone and himself how domly he is. He will let other people have their say, without trying to hoard the limelight. He is a true team player who puts the needs and interests of the group before himself. He is interested in the team winning, not him winning.
5. He doesnāt prey on the vulnerable. He doesnāt hang around the entrance of munches or clubs looking for āfresh meatā. He doesnāt try to take advantage of inexperienced submissives and use their lack of knowledge to his advantage. On the contrary, he will protect those new and vulnerable and do what he can to guide them in the right direction.
6. He doesnāt instigate politics, bitching and division between camps. He is not prepared to partake in them and will try to minimise conflict whenever possible. He has a conciliatory tone and tries to build bridges, not burn them, whilst still defending what is right.
7. Heās approachable. Heās friendly and welcoming and accepts everybody as they are. He keeps his ego in check and doesnāt carry himself with a swagger or in a threatening or arrogant manner. Heās not in possession of the truth. He knows an Ć¼berdom is quite the opposite of a true dom.
8. He admits to his mistakes. Heās happy to say sorry. He knows that being a dom doesnāt mean heās perfect. He will own up to his errors and will make reparation whenever possible. If he makes a mistake during play heāll apologise sincerely and make sure it doesnāt happen again.
9. Heās comfortable with a sub who is more intelligent, skilled and capable than him. He knows that being a dom doesnāt mean he has to be the best at everything. Heās quite happy to take instruction from her submissive and let her teach him what he doesnāt know. As an example, heās happy to take directions from her when heās driving.
10. He has nothing to prove. Heās comfortable in his own skin and doesnāt need to prove to anybody how ādominantā he is. He doesnāt try to live up to some expectation of what a dom should be. Heās confident and sure of himself and is untroubled by others disagreeing with him and having a different approach to dominance than his. He knows who he is and he doesnāt need to justify himself to anybody.
11. He doesnāt take liberties. He will not boss around a person just because sheās submissive. Nor will he grope her either. He will be clear, transparent and specific about how he wants to play, before anything happens. He will not take advantage of someone being in subspace and therefore more vulnerable. He is polite to waiters, clerks and those in serving professions.
12. Heās trustworthy. He has a strong sense of integrity, responsibility and compassion. He will stick to his agreements and fulfil his end of the bargain. He will tell the truth and behave with honesty, even if that means he loses out. Heās honourable and his word is his bond.
(source: Fetlife/DominantMan78)
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These are good tips for boys when seeking out an alpha
Love this.
