An Open Letter To Trolls And Haters
We understand. We truly do. We get it and we know what it’s like.
There you are, staring at a screen, forming an opinion. In mere moments, you’ll start typing, your blood boiling. You’re going to let them know exactly how you feel about them. You’re going to make them hear you. You’re going to make sure that you matter to them.
And of course, no matter who they are, they will hear you. They will see your words and they will feel at least a tiny fraction of the weight of them. You won’t even know what you did, but you did it. You sit back in your chair and you feel vindicated. Your shoulders relax. Your heart stops racing.
You got to them. You made someone’s day worse. You feel better.
I’m lucky to not deal with this very often, but I know a lot of people that do. And here’s the thing that you should know about those people: they’re hurting, just the same as you.
They don’t think they’re better than you, even if it feels that way sometimes. They don’t like it when people say mean things to them. And you know, deep down, that no matter how happy you are in any given moment, a single sentence, even a single word, can really ruin your day.
We understand. You’re angry. Life is hard. It is. For everyone.
But the best part of your day shouldn’t be being the worst part of someone else’s.
I’m not saying you should be nice all the time. Hell, I’m the last person to stand on that soapbox. But what I urge you to do is, before you hit “send,” ask yourself this question: “What do I want from this? What do I really want?”
If you feel like you’re being constructive or if you feel like you’re making a point, or expressing something that you think it truly important to you, you just go right ahead and hit that send button.
But, look deep down and just ask yourself. Truly, ask yourself: “Am I just angry? Or sad? Or lonely?”
If the answer is yes, try this out instead: Tell the person why you’re angry. Or sad. Or lonely. You’ll be surprised, because chances are, they’re angry or sad or lonely too sometimes. And maybe they’ll tell you why they’re angry or sad or lonely. And then maybe you’ll be a little less lonely.
Maybe you’ll find someone to be angry or sad or lonely with. I hate to break it to you, but those feelings aren’t going to go away. Life is long and for a lot of it you’re going to be sad, or angry, or lonely, and being those things with someone else is a hell of a lot more fun than being those things alone.
No one feels bad for you. In order to feel bad for you, they’d have to feel superior to you. They don’t. And if they do, you should feel bad for them.
And to be clear, I don’t always get this right myself. Sometimes, I get angry or sad or lonely and I lash out too. It’s okay. We all suck sometimes. But when I do, I try to ask myself “What was the best case scenario?”
If the answer is adding more sadness or anger or loneliness to the world, maybe rethink your choices. Rethink your words. Or maybe just keep your words inside of you. Or maybe just stick them up your ass. Those are all better choices. Especially the last one.
It’s a sad, lonely, world. And it’s full of garbage and misery and loss. And we’re all stuck here. And we all want to scream to the sky and have the sky hear us so we know our lives count before we go off to wherever we go off to.
I don’t know much, but I know this: when you’re taking your last breath and your loved ones are by your side, no one is going to lean over you and say “I’m really going to miss the way you made people feel like shit on the internet.”
You can do better. You owe yourself more than that.
Or just keep being a dick. Whatever. No one really cares. Your hurtful words may have a tiny bit of venom in them, but not enough to bring anyone down, and like a bee delivering a frightened sting, the only person who tires out and falls to the ground will be you.
People out there are ready to love you. They’re also ready to hate you. The choice is yours.
Me and some others, probably
gummygunk
andulkaphoto
izzy806
turnnoffyourmind
tangentwithtanner
germansingergirl
kianamaiart
