Anarkali 💋 @pyaar-ki-kahaani - Tumblr Blog

Qandeel Baloch- RiP

It just shows the world that the majority of Pakistani men will always be illiterate perverts who will never allow a woman to have her freedom. A country which believes in God, but also encourages and doesn't prevent men from acting like God themselves too can never be successful.

#women's rights #Islam #Nikkah #religion vs culture #Pakistan

There will be a gap for a while. But sand shifts. People step in.

Note to self on 31/12/2015

Next year, please:

- Be more kind - Worry less - Live life - Pray often and trust God - Believe in miracles - Drink more water - Travel every chance you get and explore as much as possible - Make more, and sustain current friends - Be happy

#personal #new years resolution

I am never getting married. Ever. No way am I going to be able to live with someone who may try and hurt me- consciously or not.

Why are men such bastards? Seriously, is there an actual reason or is it just to fuck about with women?

I have the bitchiest most two faced sisters ever. I seriously don't think I'll talk to them when I leave or they leave this house. And my stupid brother like a lap dog just takes their side.

Do you ever feel so alone sometimes that it's just comfortable? No longer sad or depressing or angering, just comfortable.

So last night was pretty weird. I just remember thinking that I have so many issues that no one is ever going to want to love me. To marry me. I'm never going to be able to let anyone see me vulnerable. I wish I was more open. Wore my heart on my sleeve more. But I can't. I know what it's like to hurt so I guess that's why I wouldn't put myself in a position where I could be hurt. It's weird how I've never been in a romantic relationship but have such strong feelings against it. Or for it if I'm talking about that guy from work. His names Arslan by the way. I wanted to record it here. In case nothing ever happens between us- Allah knows best- at least I have the memory. I wish I didn't obsess so much. Think so much. It's so unhealthy. I literally cannot so anything but think and worry.

I hate how much I depend on him to keep me happy. And how much my mood depends on whether or not I've seen him that day. Today was pretty bad.. We saw each other twice.. But I feel like we're never going to be comfortable enough to properly talk- unless we work together. And I heard he might be leaving. Fuck. Fml. I wish I wasn't so shy. I wish I wasn't so self conscious. I really want to talk to him. Get to know him. Maybe it's not meant to be. I need to start praying more. It's Ramadan. Ya Allah. Please guide me. Make the best choice easy for me to deal with. I know you always do. Please make it easy on my heart.

So last night was one of the worst so far. It's my birthday today.

Sometimes I feel so sad that I feel like floating. Not in the air. On water. That sounds so weird but it's true. On the water because there's something to hold me up but still let me be.

It's just gone past 4pm and I haven't spoken to anyone all day. I don't live alone but it's not really a surprise.

pyaar-ki-kahaani

My New Years resolutions this year.

To be a better Muslim. To be a better person. To control my anger. To be happy. To pass my exams. To learn Arabic. To learn to read and write urdu. To climb Everest.

InshAllah.

#reminder to self #07/06/2015

I literally can't stop thinking about him. It's all I do. I get in a bad mood thinking that I won't see him. I hate that. Shit. He probably thinks I'm a crazy stalker or that I don't like him or he's probably got a girlfriend. I really wish I wasn't such a crazy obsessive person.. I miss him so much, I like him so much.. I don't understand how you can like someone so much when you haven't even spoken to them.. I've known him for nearly two years but haven't spoken to him.. Wow I'm crazy. I wish I wasn't so shy.

I like him way too much than I should.. I'm so screwed.

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