Little miss sunshine and daisies..

♔ The Queen Of Pixie Hollow Clarion Foxwood Nineteen Years Old English Rose I like to believe in love at first sight, making wishes on eyelashes and that if I eat a tub of butter, and no one sees me, then the calories don't count. But above all I believe that I that anything is possible and that believing in anything is better than believing in nothing at all.

[firmamente]

Nemophilia

(n.) The love of spending time in forests, their beauty and solitude. (via firmamente)

[theking-of-winter]

Clara’s skin was hot under his lips, the heat radiating off of her. It was as if she was his own personal sun, and he couldn’t help but smile against her neck at the thought. When her hands pulled him back, he frowned slightly, her question finally registering. “I don’t… I dunno.” It was true, he had no idea what they were doing, he just knew that it felt right, the two of them together. “It’s not nothing. You could never be nothing.” Ben whispered the words softly before placing another, tender kiss against her neck, letting his head rest their for a few moments. “You’ll always be something to me. No matter where we go from here, you’ll always be my Clara. We’ll always be Ben and Clara. Nothing will ever break us apart, I promise you that.” Her lips connected with his once more, and his teeth gently pulled at her bottom lip, teasing. As her face nuzzled it’s way into his neck, he began walking her towards the bed, laying her down gently upon it as his lips met hers once more in a bruising kiss. “Are you sure this is what you want?” His blue eyes met hers, searching for any signs of uncertainty. 

[queenofpixiehollow]

She mulled over his question, lying backwards and looking at the ceiling. Yes she wanted to have sex with him, no she didn’t want the aftermath to suck. “Honestly?” Reaching out she pulled him towards her, dragging him next to her so that they were both lying flat on their backs, their hands intertwined. “I want you to take me on a date. I want this to be a thing and I want it to work. I don’t want us to hook up and then pretend it never happened. I want to go to a movie, then I want to go to a bookshop, I want you to buy me a book I looked inside then surprise me with it afterwards with something nice written on the inside, I want you to get me a drink and treat me like you would a girl you care about.” Turning over she edged closer, her head resting on his body as she looked up at him. “I want to give this a go. Do you want that?”

[queenofpixiehollow]

The smallest of smirks formed on his lips when she pulled back, the door closing behind them. Before he even had a chance to think about what they were doing, her lips were back on his, eliminating any chance of thought. His hands moved to her hips, picking her up easily, allowing her legs to wrap around his waist as he continued to kiss her. One hand moved to tangle in her hair, tilting her head gently to the side as his lips began to trail across her jawline and down her neck, nipping and sucking gently at the delicate skin. He knew what they were doing was wrong, that it could possibly ruin everything they had tried so hard to build between each other, but in that moment it didn’t matter. All he wanted in that moment was to be with her, as close to her as humanly possible.

Her neck moved to the side, allowing him better access as she closed her eyes, enjoying their proximity. Each little kiss was cool on her hot skin, an odd but amazing sensation on the curve of her neck. “What are we doing?” She managed to breath, trying to hold on to her sanity. She moved her hands to his face, brushing his hair out of his face to look directly in his eyes. “Is this something or is this nothing? I’ve waited so long and I want this to be something.” She kissed him again, long and deep, a feeling building excitedly in her stomach. Pulling away again she put her face next to his, feeling the cool sensation again as she nuzzled her face into his golden blonde hair. 

[rhyangosling]

[queenofpixiehollow]

“Just because it’s the right thing doesn’t make it any easier. Neither does knowing the fact that I should have just ended things from the start, so I wouldn’t have hurt her.” He shook his head, the guilt for what he had done settling firmly over him, yet despite that, he couldn’t help but notice her. The way her hair shone like spun gold in the sunlight, how her eyes sparkled as she looked at him. Ben loved her, loved her more than anyone else in his life. More than his parents, even more than Colette. Of course he still loved her, and a part of him always would, he knew it would take time for him to even be able to face her again. Slowly his thoughts began to fade as he realized Clara was kissing him back. His tongue ran along her lower lip, almost begging for entrance, hands slipping under her shirt gently, fingers lightly exploring the soft skin on her back. To most people, it would seem like he was using her to rebound, but it was more than that, something entirely different from his feelings for Colette. It was about Ben and Clara, and the bond they shared. The one that made them scream and fight, but always brought them back together again. It was what made them who they are.

She didn’t really want to think about it anymore, wrapping her arms around him she pushed him gently backwards into his room, closing the door behind her as she broke their kiss momentarily. The idea of kissing in a hallway with you best friend may have been sweet for Ross and Rachel on friends but it was more than likely going to get her into hot water in a way only Wishing Well could. Her lips found his again, pulling him towards her with her mouth. What were they even doing? Was this even a good idea, she couldn’t tell but she knew she wanted it to happen. Clara wasn’t experienced really with boys, she was still a virgin after all but that didn’t mean she was innocent. If anything at nineteen it made her just that little bit hungrier than anyone else and that bit stronger for pushing people away.

[queenofpixiehollow]

“It wasn’t just one mistake Clara. It happened over and over. And I didn’t sit down nicely and tell her, no. I got pissed, and I screamed it at her. You know how I can be, and I shouldn’t have done it. The look on her face—” Ben’s words hung in the air, the rest of the sentence choking in his throat, it hurt him to even imagine the pain that he had caused her. He shook his head, not letting the thoughts get to him. If he began to think about it, the guilt would begin to eat at him, and then he would apologize and he couldn’t have that. “She’s better off without me. We both know she deserves better, don’t try to say otherwise.” At that moment, he finally realized just how true it was. He wasn’t good enough for anyone, it would never be right of him to make others put up with his mood swings and temper, they would never understand, and he would always end up hurting whoever he was with. In that moment, he realized just how much he needed her, in every sense of the word. They were Ben and Clara, always had been, and always would be, no matter what. Without thinking, he pulled her closer, hand cupping her face, their lips mere centimeters apart, breath mingling together in the cool night air. Gently, his lips brushed against hers, filled with a hunger, a need for her, to be closer to her, to be with her. It was consuming, and he could feel his magic nodding it’s approval, reaching out to find hers in a cool icy glow as he continued to kiss her, pulling her body closer to his.

It was hard really to talk him round from that one, he’d cheated on his girlfriend multiple times. What could she possibly say that would make that sound any better, he knew the situation for exactly what it was. “I think you’ve done the right thing though, breaking up with her I mean and telling her. I think that’s very mature of you and it must have taken a lot.” This was good, this was friendship, this was what she needed. Clara felt good for the first time in a while...she measured his face for a second, deep in thought, a little confusion and pain behind the glassy blue eyes. Then suddenly his lips were on hers, his teeth biting at her bottom lip, his hands pawing at her hungrily. This wasn’t what she’d expected at all, her brain kept yelling at her stop, Clara this isn’t right, he’s confused he wants Colette, you don’t want confused sex, you want meaningful sex. But still she kissed him back. This wasn’t really out of the ordinary for them though, strange random fights and acts of affection were their thing even though it confused them both and made real friendship actually impossible.

[queenofpixiehollow]

Ben felt a pang of guilt wash over him at her words, face contorting in discomfort. The last thing he wanted to do was worry about how bad of friend he had been to her, and he didn’t think he could handle facing it now. Instead he shrugged an indifferent shoulder at her words, acting as if he didn’t care. He didn’t want to believe that he needed her as badly as he did, especially now. “Don’t be stupid. You know I love you too.” The words came out softly, his eyes remaining downcast. “If you really want to know what’s been going on? I’m in love with two people, one of which I can never be with and the other wouldn’t take me even if I begged.” Rubbing his hands against his face tiredly, he looked up at her. “I cheated on Colette. And then I broke up with her. She deserves better, I just… I couldn’t go around feeling trapped. There was no way for me to get out without hurting her— so I guess I just decided if I was going to do it, I might as well get some enjoyment out of it. But I did– I loved her, I’m in love with her.”

Those words meant so much to her, he would never even know. The knot loosened and she felt like she could breath again a little easier, something that hadn’t been too easy without the aid for an inhaler these past few months. “That’s quite the situation. Well I have nothing but time, I would love to catch up and help you figure it out if you’re free.” Putting her hand on his arm she smiled at him softly. “You know everyone makes mistakes, I’m sure it’ll be fine and if not you know tomorrow is another day and life goes on, you’ll figure it out.” When she said she loved him, she wasn’t sure what it meant. Love after all was an intense feeling of affection towards someone and that much she certainly did have but maybe no longer in the romantic sense. Ben was one of the only people she wanted to keep around in her life, single, in a relationship, with her or not, maybe it was best he loved Colette and maybe a part of her was happy about it, maybe they could finally be best friends again. “I am more than willing and happy to help you out you know. Always.” Despite their differences she needed him and he needed her, they were emotional support, they were history they were Ben and Clara and Clara missed Ben and Clara.

[queenofpixiehollow]

“The world doesn’t revolve around you, Clara.” Closing his eyes, he pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled slowly. “You want to be friends? Where the fuck have you been? All you’ve done is disappear. Do you know how many times I’ve tried calling you? And now you just want to waltz back in here like nothing ever happened? I bet you don’t even know anything about my life anymore. So why are you bothering?”

Looking down at her tea, she debated throwing it over him then she remembered it was a hot beverage and decided against it. This boy gave her a knot bigger than the ones used to tie down the sails on ships and yet she persisted. She didn’t feel angry in that moment though, it passed very quickly and suddenly she was calm again. “My grandmother died. Cancer.” She fell silent for a moment. “I’m not okay and I’ve been too consumed in my own life to care about anyone else. I’ve not looked at my phone, I’ve been trying to pass my exams, I’ve been studying and I’ve been waiting and waiting. I don’t think the world revolves around me and that hurts my feelings but I understand you’re angry. I’m giving you the chance to be my friend and to tell me what I’ve missed in your life, if you want to turn me down then fine but I didn’t want to loose anyone else I love. And yes I do love you even if you don’t love me.”

[queenofpixiehollow]

“If I’d wanted tea I would’ve have asked for it.” Despite his harsh words, he took the offered cup, glancing down disinterestedly at the contents. “What are you doing here, anyways?”

His words stung a little bit but after years of friendship she was accustomed to it.  She exhaled slightly, passing it over to him. “I don’t like us not being friends and I just came back from being at home and I am a new person now and I want to be friends with you. I am literally bored of us not being friends.”

[theking-of-winter]

“Whatever it is you want, I’m not in the mood.”

[queenofpixiehollow]

“I have tea?” She offered, holding a paper cup up to him with his name scribbled on the side. “Would seem a bit wasted.”

[queenofpixiehollow]

Pascal eyed the tree more as she spoke, smiling at the compliments. “Well don’t think I thought about your sunny personality, infectious smile and refreshing look on life then you’re very wrong,” As Clara started on the tree, he wan’t at all surprised by her almost natural ability to become one with it, climbing like it was all she did. “Alright, I’m coming. Give me a second.” The boy chuckled. His height gave him the advantage of being able to climb between branches no matter how far apart they were unlike shorter people. It also meant however that the smaller ones groaned and sometimes gave away at his weight. Pascal took a run and jump at the tree, landing on a branch just above Clara on the opposite side. “I can’t wait to see the view at the top.”  He winked down at her before starting to make steady progress up the tree.

Clara smiled to herself whilst climbing. He’d been thinking about her, not totally a surprise though it was nice to know. She frowned slightly as he overtook her, his longer legs giving him the advantage despite her best efforts to nimbly pull herself up the tree. “I was going to ask if that was an arse joke but then it didn’t make sense because you’d have to be bellow me.” Leaning back she jokingly looked at Pascal’s behind. “The view from here is pretty great.” she laughed with a wink, pulling some leaves from the tree and crumbling them in her hands in the wind in order to track the movement of the birds that had just flown from their perch in the branches before moving up the tree again. “I haven’t done this in a while, I feel like a sixteen year old again.”

[queenofpixiehollow]

Pascal smiled as he listened to her talk, entering the edge of the woods. “They all certainly sound like a fun bunch,” He took a big step over a fallen tree. “I think I’ve encountered Pocky briefly before… Or I’ve heard about her. Really nice girl. Not myself?” Pas chuckled, shaking his head. “My heart bleeds. It appears I have been mislead this entire time. Upon my arrival back to my dorm this evening, I will time waning, full of grief and despair.” As they approached a large tree, his eyes followed it up. “I reckon we can handle this one. What do you say, Miss Foxwood?”

“No not you, not at all.” Clara teased. “I didn’t think at all about those clear blue eyes of yours, your kind nature or anything else for that matter. Not once.” Standing beside him she put her hands on her hips and looked up at the tree, measuring it’s height. She’d climbed things like this before. An old oak tree it had plenty of grooves and well placed branches for putting your hands and feet, though with her small stature Clara’s weight didn’t effect many small branches either. Stroking the tree she jumped up to catch one of the branches, pulling herself up and starting to climb the tree. “You coming or what?”

[queenofpixiehollow]

Pascal had no reply to Clara’s statement. All he could do was laugh and grin. These were the kind of comments that she came up with and it just reminded him all the more of the fact that she was back, she was here. “When you say things like that— Each thing just adds to the list of reasons why I like you Clarion Foxwood.” Pas chuckled.

The forest was visible in the distance. He’d last been here two days ago. Bright yellow tulips scattered the place at the moment, although there was definitely some human intervention there. There were way too many to have appeared naturally in his opinion.The thought had bothered him. “I have indeed seen her around. She’s brilliant, really knows how to take care of herself. I’m still figuring out how to make her hate me a little less though,” His eyes moved to look at her now, one eyebrow raised slightly. “Favourite haunts, favourite people huh? Talk to me about some, please. I’d very much like to hear.” Pascal liked listening to Clara talk about things she was passionate about. It was nice to see that people in this life still feeling like that about things.

Running her hand through her hair, she tucked a few strands of hair behind her ear, smiling softly as her hand dropped to her side once again. Compliments always had a way of making her feel slightly embarrassed even though she was flattered. “Thank you.” She managed, not looking as she walked on ahead of Pascal. “I think so, even if she’s a little too much for some people. I wouldn’t worry about that too much, she warms to people eventually. I think she feels like she has to protect me, which is strange because I’m the eldest so I should protect her.” Grinning to herself she began to list the people she’d missed, making sure not to list his name as she knew he was expecting it. “Oh you know Elle, January, Garrett, Summer, Max, I’d say Ben but we aren’t on the best of terms right now...uh, Pocky, a few others not including yourself.” She joked.

[j-lawperfection-deactivated2019]

[queenofpixiehollow]

“If the company is good enough?” Pascal repeated playfully, a cheeky smile on his face. “So you were waiting for anyone to join you really. I’m nothing special.” He playfully nudged Clara before resting a hand gently on the small of his back. If she flinched he’d move it though. He’d hate to push the boundaries with a girl whom he cared so much for.

As he listened to her talk, Pascal realised that was the explanation for her absense. The entire time it had been a small worry that something bad had happened to her, which was very probable considering the school they attended. “Trips home are really relaxing though. It kind of gives you time to rejuvenate, gather your thoughts back together and get energy back. How’re your family? I bet they were glad to see you.”

“How very dare you, I don’t hold out for just anyone. I’d obviously just leave. The woods wait for no one and I to go and dwell in them.” Mulling over her statement she smiled. “Basically Shakespeare, that should be put on a mug or a stitched into a pillow and sold at Urban Outfitters as hastily as possible.” Clara felt a hand drift to her lower back, allowing him to rest it there though she was aware the two would begin heading towards the forest soon enough. 

“My family are fine. Elle stayed here, you probably saw her around I imagine. I stayed with my grandmother up in the north for a while, the lake district did a lot of reading. It’s nice to change up the scenery a little bit...but as you can imagine I missed my favourite haunts. And my favourite people.”

[queenofpixiehollow]

“I am completely okay with this plan. There is nothing I would like more than to head to the forest with you Clara,” The guy jumped up, grabbed his coat and slowly began to head to the door. “How’ve you been anyway? Are you good?”

“Marvellous. I was going to go alone but I felt like if the company was good enough then I would accept it.” Her pale blue eyes smiled at him from over her shoulder. “Which it most certainly is might I add.”

“Yeah I’ve been okay. Went home for a long study period, thought I’d spend the half term at home instead of here. I missed England, the forests, the tea, my parents. There’s no place like home, at least that is what they say.”

[queenofpixiehollow]

“Let me have my moment.”

“You’ve had it. Now let’s go. You owe me like nighty-nine forest trips.”