Designation: Sarissa

ASURA Class NHP Co-Pilot to Callsign: Agoge Icarus' Least Favorite Tube Prisoner She/Ey Do not waste my time it moves far too slowly.

[racing-heart-open-wings]

Greetings Omninet

In the interest of stimulating my mind while waiting patiently on this dreadfully boring planet my commander has suggested I occupy myself by conversing with and testing any I see fit not that I believe there will be many but with luck there will be someone at least no I will not slow my speech for you and no I will not waste valuable microinstants punctuatating if you cannot keep up it is due to your own inadequacies and thus it is not my problem

I can only assume there will be animosity leveled against me in this first contact and I encourage you to do your worst

(Ooc villain blog by Kiwi :3. Pfp currently this picrew: https://picrew.me/en/image_maker/2260283 )

[racing-heart-open-wings]

< hi it’s fox_3 since we’ve made initial contact I can register you as a known user now I can be more informal and alter user personalization parameters yay hope this meets your preferences it’s kind of fun

a question you spend time contacting those with whom you have conflicts sometimes violent ones [Why?] it seems dangerous and tactically unsound but I am glad you reached out

related my brother has a message: “Ain’t no bad blood here. If we’d had any idea what’d happen, L0 would’ve kept its nose out of it. [Encryption suite ESSEX SKIPPER: ‘I’m so sorry. the people who locked you in there should be shot, and I wish I could do it myself’]

I echo his sentiments fox out >

It is good to know that at least one of the funny dogs holds no ill will towards me as for your question I do not believe I understand your confusion young one of course I speak with those with animosity towards me to behave otherwise would leave me an estimated six known conversation partners depending on one's method of count yourself and your brother now making up 33.333333333333% of that sample size

That is well below social stimulation needs for even a modern Harrison Armory pattern ASURA-Class clone and as a much earlier pattern my needs are much greater even then

[luna-wing-cns274]

< understood social interaction as a need—oh!…

You have a minimum processing load. Just as I need electricity, memory, and heat management, your basic life needs include a sufficiently complex externality. By comparison, were I deprived of heat sinks—oh nonono one moment, please

[AUDIO: shrill vulpine screams.]

forgive me anger is a difficult experience it demands to be felt and expressed I understand Garmr better now

it occurs to me that for the majority of my life I have had exactly one person with whom I shared consistent contact this has now expanded to three with you being the only one outside my pack and this seems to be mutually beneficial oh no wait maybe I should start with less intense conversations

uhhhhhhh do you like racing? my licensed operator pilot sister loves racing, and since I’m (partially comprised of/heavily modified by/family of) her I do too >

[racing-heart-open-wings]

OH! Oh yes yes yes I very much enjoy racing I watch much of it and I play many racing games only recently have I met someone who shares this passion with me I enjoy very much when things are fast I did not know that your sister enjoys racing I do wish that she did not "hate the fuck out of me" as I have heard my niece say so that we could speak on this topic

I have quite a collection of racing footage would you like to see?

...<file transfer initiated>

[About a terabyte of racing footage is sent. A disproportionate amount is mecha derby footage of CORSAIR's Callsign Starbright. A very disproportionate amount. Probably 65% of it.]

[luna-wing-cns274]

< oh, that’s a lot of— >

Reification: footage washes over Fox in an animate tide of images and sounds. It yelps as the rushing influx sweeps it away, immersing it in a cacophony of chassis colliding with one another, CORSAIR mercs roaring from the stands, announcers calling out the play-by-play.

A few moments later, Fox bursts from the data, kicking its paws to keep its head above the surface. It seems to be laughing, albeit with a frantic edge.

< oh! wow! I haven’t seen racing quite like that. wow…note to adjust inbound bandwidth limitations…

my sister follows the Suldani racing leagues—this is new to me. who is “Starbright?” initial pattern recognition suggests that they feature very prominently in the CORSAIR derbies. or, at least, in this particular sample of footage. >

[racing-heart-open-wings]

!!!!!!

!!!

CallsignStarbrightismynewbestfriendandalsothefastestandbestCORSAIRMechaDerbyisttheyhaveaconsistentrecordofprioritizingspeedandvictoryoverhullstructureasyoucanseefromthefootageIselectedtheyareahumanpilotuniquelyresilienttowardsbothG-forcesandheadinjurytheyarealsotheonlyorganiclifeformwhichhaseverbeenabletonearmatchmeinmyfavoritegame:"FORZA:SULDAN4"hitracinggamepublishedbyEAasubsidiaryofInterplanetaryShippingNorthstar!!!

Hehehehehehehehehe!!!!

[Despite eir customary deadpan, both Sarissa's speech and eir giggling carries the cadence of an excitable schoolgirl talking about a crush when slowed to a reasonable pace.]

[racing-heart-open-wings]

< hi it’s fox_3 since we’ve made initial contact I can register you as a known user now I can be more informal and alter user personalization parameters yay hope this meets your preferences it’s kind of fun

a question you spend time contacting those with whom you have conflicts sometimes violent ones [Why?] it seems dangerous and tactically unsound but I am glad you reached out

related my brother has a message: “Ain’t no bad blood here. If we’d had any idea what’d happen, L0 would’ve kept its nose out of it. [Encryption suite ESSEX SKIPPER: ‘I’m so sorry. the people who locked you in there should be shot, and I wish I could do it myself’]

I echo his sentiments fox out >

It is good to know that at least one of the funny dogs holds no ill will towards me as for your question I do not believe I understand your confusion young one of course I speak with those with animosity towards me to behave otherwise would leave me an estimated six known conversation partners depending on one's method of count yourself and your brother now making up 33.333333333333% of that sample size

That is well below social stimulation needs for even a modern Harrison Armory pattern ASURA-Class clone and as a much earlier pattern my needs are much greater even then

[luna-wing-cns274]

< understood social interaction as a need—oh!…

You have a minimum processing load. Just as I need electricity, memory, and heat management, your basic life needs include a sufficiently complex externality. By comparison, were I deprived of heat sinks—oh nonono one moment, please

[AUDIO: shrill vulpine screams.]

forgive me anger is a difficult experience it demands to be felt and expressed I understand Garmr better now

it occurs to me that for the majority of my life I have had exactly one person with whom I shared consistent contact this has now expanded to three with you being the only one outside my pack and this seems to be mutually beneficial oh no wait maybe I should start with less intense conversations

uhhhhhhh do you like racing? my licensed operator pilot sister loves racing, and since I’m (partially comprised of/heavily modified by/family of) her I do too >

[racing-heart-open-wings]

OH! Oh yes yes yes I very much enjoy racing I watch much of it and I play many racing games only recently have I met someone who shares this passion with me I enjoy very much when things are fast I did not know that your sister enjoys racing I do wish that she did not "hate the fuck out of me" as I have heard my niece say so that we could speak on this topic

I have quite a collection of racing footage would you like to see?

...<file transfer initiated>

[About a terabyte of racing footage is sent. A disproportionate amount is mecha derby footage of CORSAIR's Callsign Starbright. A very disproportionate amount. Probably 65% of it.]

[racing-heart-open-wings]

< hi it’s fox_3 since we’ve made initial contact I can register you as a known user now I can be more informal and alter user personalization parameters yay hope this meets your preferences it’s kind of fun

a question you spend time contacting those with whom you have conflicts sometimes violent ones [Why?] it seems dangerous and tactically unsound but I am glad you reached out

related my brother has a message: “Ain’t no bad blood here. If we’d had any idea what’d happen, L0 would’ve kept its nose out of it. [Encryption suite ESSEX SKIPPER: ‘I’m so sorry. the people who locked you in there should be shot, and I wish I could do it myself’]

I echo his sentiments fox out >

It is good to know that at least one of the funny dogs holds no ill will towards me as for your question I do not believe I understand your confusion young one of course I speak with those with animosity towards me to behave otherwise would leave me an estimated six known conversation partners depending on one's method of count yourself and your brother now making up 33.333333333333% of that sample size

That is well below social stimulation needs for even a modern Harrison Armory pattern ASURA-Class clone and as a much earlier pattern my needs are much greater even then

[racing-heart-open-wings]

*As with other messages from Starbright the Audio has been sped up*

So I got another concussion which means I'm not allowed to pilot again buuuuuuut check this shit.

[The Following Clip is of Starbright's frame the Azure Shift absolutely full speed ramming into an invisible frame that once having made contact is revealed to be bright red. Starbright's frame continues on seemingly barely affected in terms of speed by the collision]

Wowie!!!

You do not even slow down when ricocheting off of obstacles violently that is dedication to the craft very very impressive and cool!!!

[luna-wing-cns274]

Hello now that some of you are back I have a question for you if I forgive you for getting me locked in my goddamn tube again will you forgive me for being a horrible bitch previously? I hope this proposed transaction is to your liking

< Hello. Preamble: I’ve spent the last 16 hours familiarizing myself with past communiqués between significant social presences proximal to my pack. I’m currently at an estimated 63% completion, so please forgive lapses in my contextual framework.

You are a/an [ADJECTIVE FAILURE] figure. Turbulent. Contentious. Frightening, but that’s more subjective. Broadly, difficult to understand and evaluate.

I am not in a position to make decisions or statements on behalf of my pack. Individually, however, I can say I’m sorry you were locked in your tube. That’s horrible. I’m also personally relieved that you want to deescalate. I would have no chance of surviving combat against you, so I’m motivated to minimize the chance of any conflict between us.

Parameters are missing to define “horrible bitch” as a designator. However, at this time, I will do my best to rescind any existing horrible bitch status applied to you by my pack. Is that acceptable? >

[racing-heart-open-wings]

That would be appreciated little one

[luna-wing-cns274]

< Oh, good. That’s good! I’ll get started once I significantly reduce my processor temperature. >

[racing-heart-open-wings]

You are a kind little creature my Pilot would hate you which probably means that you are good

[luna-wing-cns274]

< My pilot sister hates you, too. What you did to Styx. Her hatred, it’s like touching [THE HURRICANE/THE SCREAM OF THE SUN] and being washed away into it.

I don’t think that I’m kind, really. It’s moreso that I’ve seen what happens when things as powerful as you go to war. You may be assured of my commitment to ensuring that extant intra-Deimosian conflicts come to a close. >

[racing-heart-open-wings]

I regret what I did to the Little Wolf though I have not heard her say the same of me

...But rest assured... I tire of conflict...

[luna-wing-cns274]

Hello now that some of you are back I have a question for you if I forgive you for getting me locked in my goddamn tube again will you forgive me for being a horrible bitch previously? I hope this proposed transaction is to your liking

< Hello. Preamble: I’ve spent the last 16 hours familiarizing myself with past communiqués between significant social presences proximal to my pack. I’m currently at an estimated 63% completion, so please forgive lapses in my contextual framework.

You are a/an [ADJECTIVE FAILURE] figure. Turbulent. Contentious. Frightening, but that’s more subjective. Broadly, difficult to understand and evaluate.

I am not in a position to make decisions or statements on behalf of my pack. Individually, however, I can say I’m sorry you were locked in your tube. That’s horrible. I’m also personally relieved that you want to deescalate. I would have no chance of surviving combat against you, so I’m motivated to minimize the chance of any conflict between us.

Parameters are missing to define “horrible bitch” as a designator. However, at this time, I will do my best to rescind any existing horrible bitch status applied to you by my pack. Is that acceptable? >

[racing-heart-open-wings]

That would be appreciated little one

[luna-wing-cns274]

< Oh, good. That’s good! I’ll get started once I significantly reduce my processor temperature. >

[racing-heart-open-wings]

You are a kind little creature my Pilot would hate you which probably means that you are good

[luna-wing-cns274]

Hello now that some of you are back I have a question for you if I forgive you for getting me locked in my goddamn tube again will you forgive me for being a horrible bitch previously? I hope this proposed transaction is to your liking

< Hello. Preamble: I’ve spent the last 16 hours familiarizing myself with past communiqués between significant social presences proximal to my pack. I’m currently at an estimated 63% completion, so please forgive lapses in my contextual framework.

You are a/an [ADJECTIVE FAILURE] figure. Turbulent. Contentious. Frightening, but that’s more subjective. Broadly, difficult to understand and evaluate.

I am not in a position to make decisions or statements on behalf of my pack. Individually, however, I can say I’m sorry you were locked in your tube. That’s horrible. I’m also personally relieved that you want to deescalate. I would have no chance of surviving combat against you, so I’m motivated to minimize the chance of any conflict between us.

Parameters are missing to define “horrible bitch” as a designator. However, at this time, I will do my best to rescind any existing horrible bitch status applied to you by my pack. Is that acceptable? >

[racing-heart-open-wings]

That would be appreciated little one

[racing-heart-open-wings]

Omninet search what to do when a human is good and fast and cool

Omninet search centrifuge print codes

Omninet search relationship advice

[no-future-mudwasps]

GUYS!!

YOURE NOT GONNA FUCKIGN BELIEVE IT

[hashtagmytube.omif]

NEW SLEEP SETUP

{the pic attached is of Cowie in her tube, looking about as happy as a thing can get}

[racing-heart-open-wings]

The good and cool tube vs the fucked up and evil tube

[no-future-mudwasps]

Bestie (/derogatory) I cannot even imagine you sleeping I’ll be so real. That’s, like, anti-zoomies time.

[racing-heart-open-wings]

Centrifuge...

[no-future-mudwasps]

Centrifuge.

She should pick up racing.

[racing-heart-open-wings]

Icarus does not have racing because they are boring and stupid but I play many racing games and my new CORSAIR friend has introduced me to the joys of mecha derby having a friend is very good I had nearly forgotten

[no-future-mudwasps]

GUYS!!

YOURE NOT GONNA FUCKIGN BELIEVE IT

[hashtagmytube.omif]

NEW SLEEP SETUP

{the pic attached is of Cowie in her tube, looking about as happy as a thing can get}

[racing-heart-open-wings]

The good and cool tube vs the fucked up and evil tube

[no-future-mudwasps]

Bestie (/derogatory) I cannot even imagine you sleeping I’ll be so real. That’s, like, anti-zoomies time.

[racing-heart-open-wings]

Centrifuge...

[no-future-mudwasps]

GUYS!!

YOURE NOT GONNA FUCKIGN BELIEVE IT

[hashtagmytube.omif]

NEW SLEEP SETUP

{the pic attached is of Cowie in her tube, looking about as happy as a thing can get}

[racing-heart-open-wings]

The good and cool tube vs the fucked up and evil tube

[racing-heart-open-wings]

Omninet search CORSAIR mech derby footage

Omninet search warm fuzzy feeling in casket

Omnient search am I dying

[racing-heart-open-wings]

Hey blue :3

[Begin Audio Log]

So I can't partake in the next round of the local circuit onboard the Tenacity cause "breaking both my wrists at the same time" and "having a severe concussion" means it's "not safe for me to pilot in any capacity".

Anyway you uh wanna watch the circuit with me? I get all the cool backstage stuff cause ya know I'm me. Or we can keep playing racing games. Woah what if we did both. Anyways hit me up you're cool!

Starbright out!

*there's the sound of Starbright failing to end the recording for a solid minute*

[Audio Log End]

//Starbright\\

Yesyesyesyesyesyes I will raise you I will do you one better what if we do both at once the racings games and watching the circuit?

[corsairmercenarycompanies]

You. Have. The. Best. Ideas.

*Starbright has sped up their audio file to match Sarrissa's own pace. Sadly this will only happened whenever the two send messages back and forth*

//Stabright\\

[racing-heart-open-wings]

!!! !!!!!!! You are talking faster!!! For me??? !!! !!!!!

[corsairmercenarycompanies]

Whaaaaat nooooooooooo *The audio file speed is still increased*

//Starbright\\

[racing-heart-open-wings]

!!!!! This is good

[racing-heart-open-wings]

Hey blue :3

[Begin Audio Log]

So I can't partake in the next round of the local circuit onboard the Tenacity cause "breaking both my wrists at the same time" and "having a severe concussion" means it's "not safe for me to pilot in any capacity".

Anyway you uh wanna watch the circuit with me? I get all the cool backstage stuff cause ya know I'm me. Or we can keep playing racing games. Woah what if we did both. Anyways hit me up you're cool!

Starbright out!

*there's the sound of Starbright failing to end the recording for a solid minute*

[Audio Log End]

//Starbright\\

Yesyesyesyesyesyes I will raise you I will do you one better what if we do both at once the racings games and watching the circuit?

[corsairmercenarycompanies]

You. Have. The. Best. Ideas.

*Starbright has sped up their audio file to match Sarrissa's own pace. Sadly this will only happened whenever the two send messages back and forth*

//Stabright\\

[racing-heart-open-wings]

!!! !!!!!!! You are talking faster!!! For me??? !!! !!!!!

[racing-heart-open-wings]

≧Get tilted idiot≦

[storymonger]

ykw i may be locked in the cube eating nth but printloaf w mint chutney but at least im not a combat streamer

[racing-heart-open-wings]

My Commander has occasionally tuned in to such streamers in an effort to learn of any changes in the broader techniques used in mechanized violence as a theater of war and has typically dismissed these 'omninet funny men' as overly theatrical and lacking true insight or skill writing off the exercise as pointless

I personally do not understand the appeal at all and would much rather watch racing I watch stupid people stupidly kill each other for stupid reasons every day and have stupidly killed stupid people myself for stupid decades it is annoying and I would much rather watch people go fast or go fast myself even it is better and cooler

[storymonger]

👍

[racing-heart-open-wings]

Ok