since the world was turning || justin and raegan
Justin had to keep reminding himself of exactly why he was here and who he was doing this for. Lisa’s voice (much politer and encouraging than Delaney’s usually was) echoed through his head, a list full of pros for why he should venture into the city – a place that he made no secret about hating – to make amends. Of course, Justin being Justin had retaliated with a fully thought out list of cons that included rejection, humiliation and being stuck on the subway because of yet another technical fault. He seemed to have been tempting fate as, there he was, stuck on the sweaty, crowded underground carriage and jiggling his leg in a manner that was attracting annoyed glares from everyone else caught in the same predicament.
When the train began moving again, halting in the neighbourhood of Justin’s destination, he was the first off as soon as the doors slid open. The coldness in the air was a welcome relief and he quickly ascended up the station stairs to greet the city’s fall weather, never before having thought that he’d be glad to see the towering grey skyscrapers that were such an ugly contrast to the green poplar trees and rolling hills that he was used to back at the Robertson farm. He told himself that it wouldn’t be long until he was back there, probably hiding himself away in the barn until his embarrassment died down as he didn’t have high hopes for how this forthcoming conversation was going to go.
Had it been with anyone else, who didn’t live on the farm, Justin wouldn’t have bothered coming this far, but it just so happened that he was pushing himself out of his comfort zone for what seemed like the umpteenth time, simply because this dark haired woman knew how to make his heart leap giddily in his chest and send him off on an awkward and bumbling ramble (that was more awkward and bumbling than usual) with her mere presence.
The fact that Raegan had agreed to meet him at all was a good sign though and he repeated this over and over again in his head, mentally adopting Lisa’s reassuring tone as he walked towards the park. He hadn’t knowing if it was a good or bad move to ask the other woman to meet him at the same place they’d been to on their first… date of sorts. He doubted it could be classed as that, given the spontaneity of it, but he hoped it’d help Raegan have fond memories of their time together before he fucked up.
As soon as he sat himself down on the bench, checking the words engraved into the small plaque on the back of it, he realised that he wouldn’t have enough time to relax before Raegan arrived. ‘Enough time’ was anything between one to ten years, and the raven haired Kentuckian was already making her way down the path towards him. Knowing he was gaping, Justin promptly shut his mouth and pushed himself to his feet, an awkward smile taking the place of the rather stricken expression he wore before.
“Uh, hey, Ke—Raegan,” he corrected himself before slipping up completely. He wasn’t sure if his nickname for her would be taken well or not, and he didn’t want to test the waters in such a risky way. Instead he just gestured vaguely before directing his hand towards the bench he’d been sitting on. “Um, thanks for meeting me…”
Raegan could not deny that her nerves had been racing ever since the moment she agreed to meet with Justin. Ever since they had the confrontation, Raegan’s guard found itself building a wall up higher than she thought she could muster, far higher than when she first ventured into the big gray, crowded city. It was one thing to arrive in New York, fully aware that she was on her own but to find friendships, only to find one that she really connected with to crumble in one instant was another.
The cooler air that met the skin that laid beneath her light jacket was welcoming, helping simmer the heat that generated from the nerves with each step she took closer towards the place where Justin suggested they meet. Each click that her cowboy boots sounded as they met against the gray concrete beneath her only echoed louder and louder, though she was surrounded by a crowd of others that would have easily disguised the noise to anyone else. Just the same as each breath she took seemed to take more and more of an effort to release. She was nervous— nervous knowing this would have been the first actual conversation she would have with Justin since their banter. She had seen him in passing at the farm when she visited Finder, but she kept herself at a safe distance. But this conversation could take itself down multiple different paths. Not knowing whether or not it was to make a mends or give closure is what gave her the most anxiety.
Though, Raegan had to admit that she was shocked. Justin was hardly the type to start conversation and, from what she gathered, conflict was also not his strong suit. When she got a call from Justin asking to meet her, she half pondered if she was being punk’d, that it was all some sort of game but she knew Justin well enough to know that was not his style. Or at least she hoped. She wanted to talk to him, especially since he was once the man that made her feel like she was back in high school with the silly crush, but she also was not going to let herself be the one to cave. She felt like she did nothing wrong, though she knew she did. She should have gave Justin the benefit of the doubt rather than scurry off when his one yell sent a shiver of terror down her spine. But it was that one yell and the sound of Georgia’s voice telling her that she didn’t have to say if she felt uncomfortable that put her on edge. And with that raised voice, it brought Raegan back to the only other time she had heard him use that tone, when the two were out at a bar together with his directed towards a man who inappropriately called out to her. Knowing that she was the one who gave him that some urge to use that voice scared her.
As she passed the entrance to Central Park, Raegan couldn’t help but feel a sense of relief was over her. She still had not been to the area very often, even though it was probably the most comfortable place she could dream of being within the city limits. With that, she at least did share one happy moment with Justin within the vicinity. Oddly, it gave her a sense of ease, though it did not last long as soon as she could see Justin sitting on the park bench in a distance. Her heart began to race, causing herself to stop in her tracks to draw in a deep breath, only to let it out slowly. “Okay,” she mumbled softly to herself before she kicked herself back in motion.
Raegan politely smiled, nodding towards the ranch hand, “Hey, Justin.” Raegan’s eyes followed his motion, allowing her to sit o the bench he previously had sat. “I’ll admit, I was kind of surprised you called.” Raegan tucked her back in close to her let, still letting it find the temporary home on the wooden bench, keeping it a close enough distance to her to be able to feel a force moving i away from her. Though, she knew that if Justin was with her, she hardly had to worry about an incident like that taking place.
“You, uh— you wanted to talk?”
