Random Thoughts

So this is just gonna be me expressing myself and the random thoughts in my brain... replies from dreamingoftinystars CW: if you scroll too far you’ll probably see some posts from my depression times. I’m doing much better now but just content warning for then

[randomness189]

Every time I’ve talked I’ve done something wrong. I just shouldn’t talk

[littlefoxelf]

It's hard to want to do anything when it feels like no one loves you, or really even wants you around.

[randomness189]

I am a failure and want to die

[randomness189]

I can’t recognize my face

Why can I not recognize my face

Who is the other person

looking in my direction?

[randomness189]

my car has been broken for a week

my phone won’t connect

and i have no CDs, so

i’ve been driving in silence

but plagued

by the memory of you

i need a sound.

driving through the mountains,

there is no radio

that will play

except for worshipping

and jam bands

So, the sun in my eyes,

your name in my mind,

and phish playing out:

“First, came the light”

I cried.

[randomness189]

At least if I die from whatever is on the right side of my body because I am convinced it’s probably a form of cancer at this point, I am ruining my relationships so that they will be less sad when I die

[randomness189]

I hate when something that does genuinely bring me joy also makes me genuinely want to end it all

[randomness189]

I deserve to die

[randomness189]

I deserve to die

[howifeltabouthim]

'I worry I only made your life harder.'

Chris Whitaker, from All the Colors of the Dark

[confessions-into-the-void]

I just wish I was easy to love

[cheeeeek7]

I feel like a burden to everyone and I'm terrified that they will leave me bc I'm too hard to be with

[mindinthevoid]

That feeling when you never feel like you belong anywhere, and no matter what, you will always be a burden to everyone around you.

[randomness189]

-

[randomness189]

I deserve to rot in hell!

[randomness189]

They would all be better without me- all of them- every single one of them

[randomness189]

I long to be normal and loving and a good person. I long to be actually wholeheartedly good. And instead this is all I am