Am I a boy? Am I a girl? It doesn’t matter. I’m going to burn your house down.
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Cosimo Galluzzi
styofa doing anything
almost home
Peter Solarz

★
Xuebing Du
RMH
YOU ARE THE REASON
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Sade Olutola

ellievsbear
Not today Justin

Andulka
🪼

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

Product Placement
d e v o n
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@ratsonratsonrena
Am I a boy? Am I a girl? It doesn’t matter. I’m going to burn your house down.
If anyone even tries to show me the original i will shoot them on sight
baby cats very cute
So a funny thing happened this morning....
I was ahead of schedule on my way in to work, so I stopped to get breakfast at a Wawa (a popular chain of large convenience stores/gas stations on the US east coast).
As I was coming out, a small crow wheeled right over my head and perched on the corner of the awning in front of the store. He puffed his feathers and shook out his wings and regarded me with one bright black eye. I know a messenger when I see one, so I minded my manners…and ignored the odd looks from the people around me.
Me: Good morning.
Crow: -polite caw-
Me: -taking a piece of donut from my bag- Would you like some breakfast?
Crow: -tips his head the other way and flaps a few times-
Me: Here you go. -tosses the piece onto the ground just below the awning-
Crow: -hesitates, looking between me and the bit of pastry-
Me: It’s all right, it’s for you. -takes a step back for good measure- Go ahead.
Crow: GRAWK! -glides down from the awning, pecks up the snack, and wheels once over my car before flying off-
Me: Give my regards to your mistress, fella.
Lady in the next parking space: …..What kinda Halloweentown shit was that?
Me: -big smile- Any witch worth their salt knows you should always be polite to crows. -hops into car and goes on to work-
Granny Weatherwax would be proud, both of the courtesy to the crow, and the lesson in headology you just gave the lady.
I CAN ASK FOR NO HIGHER PRAISE THAN THIS.
Alright but what was the funky lil guys m e s s a g e
If I recall correctly, I got a raise shortly thereafter. It wasn’t a big one, but it was something!
May the 10 of Pentacles bless your account with more money than you can spend. 💵✨
10 of Pentz came thruuu
Omg this actually works!!! Thank you 10 of Pentacles!!!
I could seriously use this money right now….
Please give me my refund of 400$ soon…
I feel obligated to reblog this every time it shows up in my dash
No bragging, just 100% floored and grateful. Work hard, maintain a positive attitude, and believe that anything can happen.
So I reblogged this exactly a week ago because I thought it was funny and uh lo and behold, a family friend wrote me a big ol’ check just to help me out of a tough financial spot AND my bank refunded me $32 for fees they’d originally taken out. SO UH YEAH. Reblogging this again in hopes that it brings equally good fortune to my followers.
Sure why not? Jobs bring in money and prosperity…
I NEED TO FIX MY CAR DOOR
It fucking WORKED.
rb to change your fate
Press Y to honk is now the new press F to pay respects
Nah its the direct opposite
Press Y to pay disrespects
Okay let me rant about this a bit. Press Y to honk IS, quite literally, exact opposite of press F.
Press F to pay respects appears only once in Call of Duty Advanced Warfare - hell, only once in entire Call of Duty series. It’s a single, context-sensitive action that you can never do before or again. In addition, you are forced to do it to progress - if you won’t, you will sit there at this stupid funeral for hours and days. It’s funny because it’s so horribly ill-fitting and forced. We’re laughing AT writers and designers who thought this was a good idea.
Press Y to honk, on the other hand, is systemic, not contextual. At any point in Untitled Goose Game, you can honk, whenever you like - it’s a dedicated honking button. Not only that, but honking has an actual effect - NPCs will be distracted by hearing it, turning in your direction, and some will run away. The act of honking is not funny - what’s funny is the concept of honking, that in a game about a goose there is a button dedicated solely to honking - but also, what’s funny are the interactions that ARISE from using the honk. Making someone trying to hammer a nail smash his thumb by honking right as the hammer goes down - that’s great comedy, and it’s PLAYER CONTROLLED comedy. We’re laughing WITH the designers, because they gave us a gameplay tool, a mechanic that is hilarious because we have the power to make it hilarious.
Press F to pay respects is funny because it’s horrible game design. Press Y to honk is funny because it’s amazingly good game design.
girl soldier is pulled in a pond by horny mermaids
uuhh this description sounds like a porno ahahah
raccoons and their… little hands
https://twitter.com/DavidJuurlink/status/1129811903776198659
We deserve autonomy.
I support right to die legislation and I’m glad this woman was able to die on her own terms. I can only hope that will be an option for me if and when I need it. I don’t agree with the people saying that the doctor ‘murdered’ her… to suggest that she was a victim here is to ignore her ability to make choices for herself.
This speech-language pathologist taught her dog 29 words, and he can even form full sentences.
Video by Christina Hunger
Dogs actually do have a language center in their brains. They process language just the same way we do, just not as well.
They do understand our words. This is not true of all domesticated animals (horses, for example, can only manage to distinguish a relatively small number of spoken commands…but boy do they know what you’re really saying).
They don’t understand “just your tone of voice” as a lot of people think.
As of 2016 the record vocabulary for a dog demonstrating understanding of words is over 1,000.
So if you give them a way to talk back, they’re going to use it.
The development of language skills is probably a side effect of domestication and of being kept in close contact with humans. A dog that was a better hunting partner would be kept and bred and over time they developed a better understanding of language.
In other words, dogs are pretty dang smart because we need them to understand us.
And also that is a very good boy.
^ Would like to agree and make one amendment - very good GIRL. This is Stella the dog!
Check out the owner Christina’s Instagram: one of the first things I saw was a video where the dog started barking and, when prompted by the owner, said “outside, look look look look look look look, come outside.” Which is basically exactly how one would expect a dog to speak.
The owner described bringing an unknown package into the house, and the dog ran away to push the buttons for “help no no help help” which is also about what I expect goes on in a scared pup’s mind.
In another video, the dog tried to push a button, and the button wasn’t working. The dog paused and then pushed the buttons for “No. Help.”
In yet another (which the owner seemed impressed by), Stella said “come eat come play.” The owner asked the dog which she wanted to do, to eat or to play? And the dog clarified “come eat.” After eating, then the dog tried to instigate play. So the dog may have been able to understand a short spoken question, and how “questions and answers” work, and also understands sequences, even if she can’t express them (”I want to eat, THEN I want to play”)
Stella can even recount short-term memories, like when her family returned from the beach for dinner and she said “water good, no eat, play”
By the way, the owner uses the buttons as well, which probably really helps reinforce their meaning. She uses them to say things like “Stella all done eat” or “Stella and Christina go outside, bye!”
Wanna know my favorite part? Stella sometimes pushes the buttons for “Stella good” when she’s done a good job. Stella IS good! :D She also makes phrases using “love you,” like “Christina, love you, come play!”
*whispers* amazing
Man of the moment Keanu Reeves has shown his generosity by giving away £50 million of his earnings from the Matrix sequels. The 38-year-old decided to hand over the money to the unsung heroes of the sci-fi blockbusters - the costume and special effects teams.
*fistbump*
Confirmed. He’s also dumped millions into cancer research. I really do love Keanu Reeves a lot.
Keanu Reeves is like the nicest person. He still lives in an apartment/flat and he gives most of his money away to charities and people who need it. He even invites some paparazzi people to sit down and eat with him when he’s at a coffee shop or restaurant. He’s such a nice person.
When I was working on the UWS, one of my delivery guys accidentally backed his scooter into a parked car in front of the restaurant. I went out to help, since the driver didn’t speak much English, and it turned out the car belonged to Keanu Reeves. He helped us pick the scooter up, and when I asked if we could exchange insurance information (because the front of the car was pretty banged up), he kept telling us not to worry about it and put his hand on the driver’s shoulder and said “I just want to make sure you’re okay, man. Are you okay?” And he was so sincere about it and so kind that I decided in that moment I would always defend Keanu Reeves at all costs. He is an excellent man.
I need to be more like Keanu Reeves because I’m evil compared to him.
“Next few centuries”
Keanu dropping hints that he is an immortal.
i love keanu reeves
My wife and I were dining at Nobu’s in Honolulu and sitting across from us was Keanu or at least I thought it was. We kept talking about whether it was him or not and finally, I decided to throw some old school Bill & Ted at him.
I stood up and threw my arms up into the motion of an air guitar, my wife is begging me to sit back down, and I pointed at the guy who may be Keanu Reeves, and said, “Most Excellent.”
He stood up and did it back at me. Then we both had a moment and pointed at each other. I sent him another of whatever it was he was drinking. It was a cucumber sake martini. That was the end of it.
Or so I thought.
He left before we finished our meal. By the time we were done, dessert came that we didn’t order. We thought, “oh, must be compliments of the chef.” Then the bill never came. When we asked for it, our waitress said Keanu Reeves took care of it.
IT WAS REALLY HIM. And he left a note. It said, “thanks for the refresh. Keanu.”
When I finally saw him again years later, because of work. I brought it up. Then he air guitar and said, “most excellent. I remember. At Nobu’s. Thanks for the drink.” We chatted a bit and I got an autograph for my mum because she’s a huge Keanu fan. Then that was that.
What a moment.
An angel
And he does a lot of anti human trafficking work iirc. Seems like a really awesome guy.
Back when I first moved to NYC, I got a job as a theater usher. We were all young, 18-20 or so, and it was heavily impressed upon us that we needed to treat the theatergoers with TOTAL respect at ALL times or risk our jobs. As such, we were all totally underprepared for the drunk guy who tried to steal a bottle of wine from the lobby bar during intermission. We were trying to politely get the bottle back, but he was growing loud and belligerent. Since the second act was now starting, this was a countdown to all of us being in trouble.
Then Keanu walks up. Calmly charms the guy. Slips the usher behind the bar cash to cover the bottle, without the guy even noticing, and walks him back in to his seat like it’s a normal thing he does every day. He didn’t know the guy, didn’t know any of us, but effortlessly deescalated the situation and quite probably saved some jobs that night.
Just a wandering do-gooder, this man.
#everything i’ve ever heard anecdotally about keanu reeves #further convinces me that he is the chillest immortal #like he’s probably just spent centuries donating blood instead of drinking it (via @revolutionarygirlshati)
Curious Zelda
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