My Ranking of Rock Paper Scissors Season 1 Episodes from Worst to Best
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! May your day be filled with love, family, and no less than six pieces of turkey.
In other news, WOOHOO! Season 2 has finally premiered! I'm sooo happy! I watched the premiere about a week ago and it was pretty good, though I have to say it's not as good as the previous two half-hour specials. I've also seen the other two episodes that premiered; one was very good and the other was...not-so-good. If you guys want, I can give more elaborate thoughts in a separate post.
Anyway, to celebrate the long-anticipated second season, I wanted to give you guys my full thoughts on all of the episodes from season 1. And what better way to do that than with a ranking? As you can tell from the title, this is going to be a worst-to-best kind of list. Why start from the worst? Because it's better to end things on a positive note. :)
(Just a heads up, there will be spoilers for some episodes. Read at your own risk.)
I have very few nice things to say about this episode. I can't call it an outright abomination, but out of all the adventures our beloved trio have been on, this is the one I want to rewatch the least. Yes, even more so than "The Fart Joke Debate."
So, the plot is that Rock and Scissors are having their annual prank war with their neighbors, the Rat Bros, which they've never managed to win apparently. The two of them try to persuade Paper to join them this time, but he refuses because he believes pranks are too mean. Yes, the guy who finds people falling down to be the funniest thing ever is apparently too nice for simple practical jokes. But we'll get to that episode later. Also, it's a little hard to believe that Rock, who is arguably nicer than Paper, would be okay with pranking people. But hey, the guy's also okay with assisting evil robots in their plans to take over the world, so maybe I don't have a right to complain.
Eventually, Paper is peer pressured into joining the war after he finds out Pencil is participating, too. Predictably, every prank the Rocham Bros try ends in failure because Paper is still trying not to take things too far. This leads everyone, including Pencil, who isn't even on the trio's side in the war, to scold him and urge him to up his game. Yep, it's an "everyone turns against Paper just to give him a hard time" episode (I hate that that's a genre of episode) and while it's not the first one we get, it's definitely the worst of them.
So, after some prodding, Paper does end up upping his game, to the point he has a full-on psychotic episode and attempts to shoot one of the Rat Bros into space. He even gets a moment to laugh and throw Pencil's words back in her face, which is all-too satisfying. But then...comes the ending. I really do not like this ending. Let's talk about it.
The episode ends with Scissors, of all people, giving a lecture about how it's wrong to prank others and that they should be focused more on science and all that junk. Yes, I know he's just repeating the exact same speech Paper gave at the beginning of the episode, but it's still not something Scissors should be saying. It's out of character and not to mention, his little "change of heart" comes right out of nowhere with little to no buildup. I could believe it if it was just a diversion to let everyone's guard down so Scissors could pull off a last-minute prank to win the war, but it's not. Literally, the only reason this moment is there is to make Paper feel even worse. And yeah, Paper gets scolded by Pencil for taking it too far. B****, you told him to UP HIS GAME!!! Furthermore, your ray gun thingy almost made Scissors float off the planet, you're not one to talk. And then as if things weren't miserable enough, in another completely out-of-character moment, Rock chooses not to comfort his upset friend and instead just shows off how good he looks in the winner's crown, which he didn't even win. Wow...
Like I said, this episode is not totally irredeemable. There were a few jokes I could chuckle at, such as Rock stubbing his toe and letting out a loud drum solo (it makes sense in context) or the bait-and-switch with the Rat Bros finding out about the trio's presence through Rock playing the wrong kind of music as opposed to Paper just being out in the open, but it's not worth the mean-spirited humor and that terrible ending. Poor Paper deserves better than this...
So apparently, the last episode of Season 2 is about Scissors becoming a supervillain, which is a rather interesting concept. Honestly though, it's probably unnecessary because if you ask me, this is the episode where Scissors is portrayed as a villain. More specifically, a "Designated Villain." And that's what makes this episode so frustrating to me.
The plot is that Scissors has become so good at bowling that he starts getting perfect scores in order to take advantage of a deal involving free curly fries. And because Scissors and only Scissors is getting free food, the bowling alley owner is in danger of losing his business. And the episode wants us to believe that Scissors is the one in the wrong here for taking advantage of a deal that the bowling alley owner himself set up. Look, you're not fooling me. Just because you give someone devil horns and make them evil laugh doesn't automatically make them the villain.
Sure, I'll concede that Scissors is going overboard with how many games he's played. But if you expect me to buy that it's his fault the bowling alley is going out of business, you're out of your gourd. First of all, the owner is the one who promised the patrons free curly fries for a perfect game. It's his own policy that's causing his business to fail. And instead of, I don't know, changing or removing the policy, he blames Scissors for his increasing debt and stress-induced aging.
I know what you're thinking: "Oh regularponyfan, you just love Scissors too much and think he can do no wrong." Okay, maybe. But in this case, I genuinely don't believe he's doing anything wrong. It's not like he's cheating his way to victory like you would expect him to; he's winning the games fair and square. Yet, we're supposed to feel sorry for the bowling alley owner because he has crappy business sense. I'm sorry, Mr. 18-year-old-who-looks-like-he's-40, but when you make Scissors out to be the bad guy when he's not and then manipulate an altruistic rock into doing your dirty work, you don't get any sympathy from me. Oh, and this is just a nitpick, but why does he keep calling Rock "kid"? I have no idea how old Rock is exactly, but he's definitely an adult and I would assume much older than 18. You can't call someone older than you "kid," it makes no sense.
Also, the subplot with Paper and Pencil is kinda dumb.
#36: The Fart Joke Debate
For anyone who's wondering, no I didn't rank this episode so low because of the fart jokes (although those didn't help). It's low because like "Prank War" above, it's another episode where everyone is against Paper for no reason.
The basic plot: Paper doesn't like fart jokes. So Rock, Scissors, and Pencil try to convince him that he's wrong to have that opinion...to obnoxious degrees. And somehow, we're supposed to see Paper as the bad guy for wanting them to stop. Well, guess what, writers? If someone came out of my cereal bowl and farted in my face, I'd be pissed off too.
And then, instead of learning that people can have different senses of humor, Rock, Scissors, and Pencil make fun of Paper for finding jokes about people falling down funny. Because once again, it's an episode where everyone is against Paper. (Also, it's wrong for Paper to laugh at people falling down, but A-OK for Scissors to laugh at people getting run over by bulldozers?)
The only reason this is higher than the other two episodes is because I do like the backstory of Jonathan Fartjoke (really, writers? That's the best name you came up with? You could've gone with the name you gave him in the shorts, Jonathan Buttwind) and the moral of "it's important to let yourself and others be happy" is a good one. It's just a shame it's surrounded by poor writing and character derailment. Although that "for your awards consideration" is an admittedly good joke. Like...the only good joke in the whole episode...
Let me start by saying how annoying it is that this was the only season 1 episode not uploaded to the (now dead) Google Drive. While there was a link to it in the watch guide, whoever recorded the episode on their screen opened some weird editing software in the middle of it and as a result, it skipped ahead. Granted, not much was cut out, just the part where Paper is showing off his dance moves, but still. Because of this, I didn't get to watch the actual full episode until months after the episode aired. Not that watching the episode in its entirety changed my opinion of it.
In case it wasn't obvious from the title, this is the episode that introduced the dimwitted but charming Potato. The plot is that Potato shows up randomly one day and everyone automatically decides she is the best person ever. Meanwhile, Paper is jealous because everyone loves her so much and is ignoring him. If that wasn't bad enough, he is consistently compared to Potato and told that he is unlikable just to make him feel worse. Yep. it's another "everyone is against Paper" episode. You'll notice very quickly that a good majority of those episodes are going to be close to the bottom.
Naturally, Paper wants to get his friends' attention again, so he continually tries to one-up Potato and prove he is just as likable as she is...only to fail and keep having Potato's "superiority" rubbed in his face.
Now, I'm not saying Paper is completely innocent here, which is why this episode is placed higher than "Prank War" and "The Fart Joke Debate," where he is antagonized just for having an opinion. He does kind of act like an attention whore at the beginning, forcing his friends to watch him display his many "talents" in an effort to boost his own ego. But after Potato comes into the picture, it becomes less about showing off for him and more about wanting his friends to include him. That's...really sad, actually.
Believe it or not, though, if you expect me to be angry at Rock, Scissors, and Pencil in this episode, I'm not. In fact, I'm actually impressed how the three of them don't abandon Paper completely and they don't outwardly ignore him in favor of Potato. They still make it clear that they want to keep being friends with him, even looking worried when he's trying too hard to get their attention. And even when they all prepare to leave the planet to go with Potato, they don't just leave Paper without telling him; they actually give him the opportunity to come with them. So, my issue doesn't lie with them.
"Well obviously, your problem must be with Potato then, since she's the one causing Paper distress in this episode." Well..yes and no. Surprisingly, I don't hate Potato. In fact, I like her quite a bit. She has plenty of cute, funny moments that make her very likable. I think she's alright. I can see why she is liked by everyone in the episode. Actually, that's a bit of an understatement. Nobody in this episode likes Potato. Nobody in this episode even LOVES Potato. Everyone in this episode WORSHIPS Potato. And you know what? I wouldn't mind that so much...if the writing surrounding this scenario wasn't so forced.
No joke, the focus group scene legitimately pissed me off. So, Paper shows some people a single clip of himself doing a dance move and every single person in the room claims he is unlikable based on that one, singular clip. Then, when he shows them a similar clip of Potato, they all instantly love her. Keep in mind, Paper finds out at the end of the episode that the only reason people didn't like him is because they thought he was trying too hard. And admittedly, he was. But here's the thing: there was no way the focus group could conclude that from watching just one clip of him. They had no previous context, judged Paper without even trying to learn the context, and then praised Potato like some god, even though for all they knew, she could've been showing off in her own clip. This whole scene makes me hate every single person in that room, especially the guy who was all like: "Sorry, I thought you said 'Does Potato make me wanna live every day to the fullest?'" Get out, indeed.
However, despite all of the frustration this episode caused me, in the end, I can't hate it too much. For one, there is a heartwarming resolution where Potato tells Paper that she and the other guys do like him and they hug it out. That moment alone made everything else about the episode somewhat worth it. Not enough to make me put it any higher, but still, it was sweet.
#34: Paper's Secret Weapon
I really liked this episode. I mean, I really liked it. Wait, sorry. I should be a bit more clear.
When I say I really liked this episode, I don't mean I watched the whole thing and ended up liking it. I mean while I was watching the episode I liked it...and then the ending ruined it for me.
So, this episode had the potential to be one of the most heartwarming episodes of the series. In it, Rock and Scissors find out that Paper is only a good inventor when he is extremely angry, so the two of them go out of their way to make him upset in order to help him win an inventor's fair and thus, prevent him from becoming depressed from getting last place again. That's actually...really nice. It's sweet to know that despite all the flack Rock and Scissors (especially Scissors) give him, they still love and respect the guy enough to want him to be happy.
There is a lot of good in this episode, whether it's funny moments like the dream sequence of Paper getting roasted by the smartest figures in history, or endearing moments like Scissors comforting Paper when he inevitably loses, claiming he does have what it takes to be a really good inventor despite everything. It's stuff like this that make me want to rank an episode fairly high and I almost considered it to be one of my favorite episodes...and then the ending happened.
Basically, after Scissors gives Paper his heartfelt speech, the latter is inspired to enter the next inventor's fair, feeling more confident than ever. He is so confident, that he ends up creating a great invention and winning the fair...only for it to just be another dream sequence. Now, that alone is not the moment that killed the episode for me. What killed the episode is the fact that afterwards, Rock, Scissors, and Pencil outright state that Paper had no chance of winning and that none of them believed in him after all. Wow. Just wow.
Writers, I know that you love making Paper the butt of your jokes, but is it too much to ask to give him a victory once in a while? Or at the very least have his so-called friends showing him an ounce of respect?
Look, I get that this show is a comedy and it's a tradition to end comedies with a joke like this one does. But if the joke ends up ruining an otherwise heartwarming scene, nine times out of ten, your audience is going to be more annoyed than amused. I can promise I was certainly annoyed by this ending, to the point it made me like the episode less.
The reason this episode ranked higher than "Potato" is because while the former was filled with bad moments that ultimately led to a good ending, this one was filled with good moments that led to a bad ending. And while many of you may disagree with me on this, I'd rather have an episode that entertains me all the way through until it gets to the end than an episode that frustrates me until the end. And anyway, if I wanted to, I could just pause the episode right before it gets to that infamous joke and save myself from the disappointment.
Another "Paper vs the world" episode, and hopefully the last one for a few entries.
So in this episode we find out that Rock has his own holiday because his kind is loved and appreciated by all. Yes, all of a sudden, everyone adores big, solid chunks of earth because their calendar told them to. A rock even hits someone's car and they're still calling them "the best things ever." But to be fair, they do give reasonable explanations for why rocks are important, so I guess I can understand celebrating them...unlike some other insignificant object. But we'll get to that in a minute.
Anyway, Paper decides he should get his own holiday and tries to persuade the council of holidays to give him one. And at first, I thought he had a case. Paper was once considered a vital, life-changing invention. You could write on it, draw on it, even fold it to make origami (which the episode points out). Then the computer was invented and paper was pretty much considered obsolete. Not to mention, it being made from trees makes it bad for the environment. So yeah, I can kinda see why Paper wouldn't get his own holiday due to these factors so that's not the part of the episode that annoys me. What does annoy me is the second half of the episode.
So in a moment of jealousy, Paper decides to erase "National Raspberry Cake Day" from the calendar to make room for his own day (BTW, Rock tells Paper the reason he can't get a holiday is because they have too many already. But then why'd he, Pencil, and Potato [of course Potato gets a holiday...] even let him try out?). The result? The entire town goes into panic mode because apparently raspberry cake is the most essential thing in the entire universe. According to the episode, it's used in fertilizer, serves as rocket fuel, and even heals the fatally wounded.
...And my suspension of disbelief just flew out the window. Look, I get this show is known for breaking the rules of logic sometimes, but there's a fine line between funny nonsense and just plain stupid. This episode crossed that line multiple times.
It's not like it's impossible for me to believe that something as random as raspberry cake is capable of accomplishing such miracles, especially in a cartoon. My issue is with the lack of foresight. If Raspberry Cake really was the most powerful, godly person in existence, why wouldn't Paper know about it? Wouldn't he at least have heard of the accomplishments, like say, on the news or even from his fellow science-lover Pencil? I can believe that Raspberry Cake is OP, but I just can't believe that Paper would be the only one locked out of the loop on his abilities. Furthermore, if everyone in town really relied on the obscure dessert so much, why wouldn't they have extra lying around somewhere in case of situations like this?
What's more frustrating though is that there was a way for this episode to work and still have Raspberry Cake be considered important. Instead of having the town panic and go into full-on apocalypse mode, maybe just have everyone be extremely sad or something. Make the people depressed because their favorite food is no longer around to brighten their day. Not only would it make more sense, but it might even make Raspberry Cake look less like an oblivious moron.
Yeah, that's another thing about this episode that bothers me and that's Raspberry Cake's ignorance. He can clearly see that the city is in ruins due to his absence, yet despite everyone repeatedly saying how much they need him, he still doesn't think they need him. Dude, are you blind? Open your eyes! Everything is a mess with you gone! You shouldn't need Paper admitting he removed your holiday to tell you that people do want you around!
I don't know, this episode had some good moments, like Scissors' apology parade, the one dad annoyed by his son's desire to be a rock, and even the parade band playing Rock's song from "Car Wash," but overall, the writing is just too lazy for me to rank this episode any higher.
I don't have much to say about this one. As much as I prefer the episodes where the trio team up as opposed to just going off and doing their own thing, this one is kinda boring, honestly. I don't think there was a single joke that I laughed at or even smirked at. The mood pants were...meh. Scissors on the game show was...meh. The ending was...meh. Nothing really stands out in this episode. Well, except for the villain, Georgie. She does manage to stand out...but not in a good way.
Georgie is essentially the counterpart to Catalina, in that both of them are famous people who have a grudge against Scissors for mildly screwing them over. But whilst Catalina at least has magic powers and hidden depths to make her more interesting, Georgie is just a normal, petty girl who got upset over not being invited to a birthday party. Also, Catalina at least was humiliated by Scissors when both of them were already adults; Georgie has been holding this grudge for who knows how long? Like, OMG, you didn't get invited to a birthday party of a kid you probably didn't like to begin with. Get over yourself. You're starting to sound like a certain bratty aardvark I know.
And just like Catalina, Georgie also takes her anger out on Rock and Paper, despite neither of them doing anything to upset her. With Catalina though, you could argue that she was only really directing her revenge magic toward Scissors and she didn't specifically target Rock and Paper until they tried to get involved. But Georgie is punishing them just for being associated with Scissors, which makes her come off as more of a petty b**** than anything.
Overall, I wouldn't call this episode bad, but I wouldn't call it good either. I would just call it "middle of the road." I did like the message at the end, however, that desiring to be cool will only lead to misery. Too bad Rock was the only one to really learn that lesson.
This is another one where I don't have a lot to say. I watched this episode long before I got into the series and it's one I don't revisit very often. In case you forgot, it's the episode that introduces Pencil.
So, things I liked about this episode? Well, I love how progressive it is, not only because it features an LGBT couple, but also a dark-skinned president who happens to be a female. For the latter, it makes you wonder if the showrunners were trying to be like the Simpsons and predict real-world events ahead of time. Sadly, this turned out to not be the case. But I'm not here to talk about the current state of the world, I'm here to talk about the episode.
I love how Paper and Pencil interact here. The writers made them seem like such an adorable couple. My favorite thing about their relationship, at least how it's portrayed here, is how Pencil shows so much respect toward Paper, even though she knows he's not on the same level of intelligence as her. Speaking of that, it's rather amusing to watch Paper act like a complete doofus around Pencil. The part where he tries to repeat all of the big words she's saying gets me every time ("Farkus Germany," like dude what? XD). And unlike all of the other episodes I've talked about where Paper gets the short end of the stick, here it's tolerable because he's the one digging himself deeper and deeper. Oh, and of course this episode has the Hipponoids. The Hipponoids are awesome. Seriously, writers, bring the Hipponoids back in season 2, they didn't get enough screentime.
If I did have a real complaint, it's that the way they introduce Pencil kind of makes her seem like a Mary Sue that acts like nothing more than a shallow love interest, but thankfully she phases out of it later on. Other than that, I can't find anything wrong with this episode. It's okay, but nothing noteworthy.
And now, we get to the first episode, in production order at least, which also happened to be the first episode I watched since Nickelodeon put it up on YouTube, along with "Paper's Big Lie" and the pilot episode, to watch for free. So I was scrolling through YouTube and happened to stumble upon the video by chance and I thought: "What the heck is this? This looks dumb. Oh well, may as well watch it. Not like I've got anything better to do." So I watched the entire video from beginning to end and upon finishing this episode specifically, my reaction was basically: "Wow, that was as stupid as I thought it was going to be. This show is definitely not going anywhere."
Nevertheless, I didn't want to judge the series based on one episode, so I watched the next one. And the one after. And the one after that one. And then I fell in love with Scissors and the rest is history.
Looking back, this episode is okay. It's a pretty standard episode. The closest comparison I can make to it is the Loud House episode, "The Sweet Spot." And by that, I mean it just so happened to be the first episode I watched and thus, it kind of gave me a bad impression. Then once I became a fan of the series, my opinion softened a bit and I just saw it as average.
That being said, I prefer this episode over "Paper's Big Lie," mainly because it features the trio working together, one of my favorite aspects of this series. Also, I can't help but wonder how the three eventually escaped "Birthday Jail." I know that's probably not a question I need to ask because "it's a cartoon, the episode could end with the world blowing up and in the next everything is fine." But "Rock Paper Scissors" has proved to value its continuity given how many times it's acknowledged past episodes, so why they never explained how the Rocham Bros got out of this predicament is a little odd. Anyone wanna write a fanfic about the aftermath?
But I think the real mystery involving this episode is...why did Nickelodeon choose to air "The Fart Joke Debate" first instead of this? Did they really think an entire episode dedicated to quips about breaking wind would attract an audience more than an episode that establishes their main characters? Then again, this is Nickelodeon we're talking about. They make dumb business decisions.
This episode is alright. I don't have any complaints, but not too many praises either. It's kinda boring, in my opinion, like most episodes involving father-son bonding are to me (to this day, I still don't understand why "A Goofy Movie" is so acclaimed).
That being said, it is cool we got to see one of the Rocham Bros' parents for the first time. Rock's dad is a pretty interesting character. At first glance, he seems like the kind of parent who forces their kid into what they consider to be the right career path, just to make a point that they're always right. But the episode establishes that he does care for Rock and is just trying to make sure he doesn't get hurt from choosing an occupation that could potentially humiliate him.
And that's another thing I like: the episode could have made Rock's dad completely in the right and have Rock get embarrassed for pursuing a job in modeling. But they don't. Instead, Rock is inevitably accepted for who he is, even if his dad doesn't necessarily agree with the particular lifestyle. if I didn't know any better, I'd say this episode was trying to be a metaphor for...something else entirely.
Overall though, I'm not eager to watch this episode over and over again. It's a nice, heartwarming story, but it's still a bit lacking. For instance, I really wish they gave Paper and Scissors more to do. Like, they imply that the two of them are going to try to get in on Rock's "robot fighting" gig, but it's never explored until the episode is nearly over. Disappointed. Nevertheless, I hope Season 2 or Season 3 gives us another appearance from Rock's dad because I'd like to see more of him.
Just for fun though, here's a couple of my favorite exchanges in this episode:
"Could you lock the door when you leave? I don't want Paper sneaking in and trying us on again."
*Paper enters the room and immediately steps back out while whistling*
"Paper, you still being a creep to that girl down the hall?"
"Yes sir..."
"And Scissors..."
*Scissors runs away crying*
"Bye, Dad! I love you!"
"You know I'm uncomfortable with emotional words."
"Kay, we'll deal with that next visit!"
"Is there anything else you wanna say, Dad?"
"Not with my mouth..." *proceeds to smile using his mouth XD*
...Seriously, you couldn't have said "not with words" instead?
Another episode that's pretty standard, but watchable. Basic plot: Rock wants a pet, but Paper and Scissors don't think he's responsible enough to own one, given how often they've had to step in and take care of everything.
Pfft...HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Sorry, I just find the idea of Scissors of all people taking responsibility for something outright ridiculous. In all seriousness, though, why does he even care about this? We all know that he's not going to lift a finger to take care of whatever pet they get and is just going to let Paper deal with everything when Rock inevitably fails. The guy was too lazy to take out the trash, remember. So why would he even bother to help Paper rig Rock's "responsibility test" when the outcome doesn't affect him either way? Eh. Whatever.
The rest of the episode is okay, it's just that one part that bothers me. As for what I liked, there are two moments that stand out. Number one, when R.O.V.E.R. turns evil and literally no one bothers to stop him because he's Rock's pet. It's so stupid, but at the same time, hilarious. And number two is the part where Scissors calls himself "the cutest thing in the apartment" (he's not wrong ^_^) and Paper doesn't even disagree with that statement. Oh yeah. Between this moment and the one in "Helping with the Groceries," I can definitively conclude that the writers totally ship them.
And that is the last of the episodes I consider "mediocre." Now let's move on to the episodes I can call "good."
Let me start off by saying this: Why are three grown adults playing a game meant for children? Especially when two of those adults have jobs, which they probably should be at? "Oh, maybe it's a weekend?" And they're really spending it playing a kids' game? Any other episode they'd probably just sit around watching TV. Whatever, that's a nitpick. Otherwise, this episode is fine.
It's here we get the first of another genre of "RPS episodes" and that's the "Paper vs. Scissors" episode. While "Paper vs. the world" episodes have everyone turn against him, these episodes only have him face off against Scissors. And the latter seem to be just as, if not more common than the former. The writers really looooove making these two compete, to the point it's like 80% of their relationship. (The other 20%, if you were curious, is strictly romantic. Seriously, I cannot come up with any "straight" explanation as to why Scissors gave Paper that tattoo.)
But either way, I don't mind Paper and Scissors being competitive towards each other as long as the conflict isn't completely one-sided. And for the most part, it isn't. Many of these episodes do make it clear that both of them are in the wrong and therefore, both should suffer the consequences of their actions. Unlike other episodes in this category though, the two's arguments don't really cause any real harm this time around. Literally, they're just playing a game, so it can be interpreted as just "friendly competition." Well, maybe "friendly" is the wrong word here...
Besides that, I can't think of anything else to say. As far as jokes go, they're pretty standard. The best one, in my opinion, is when Scissors recounts Paper asking Pencil for a time machine, making him call himself "a big dummy." Everything else like "dinoswords" or Paper mixing up his words is just okay.
Why don't we just move on? Oh by the way, Rock, you're behind the lamp again.
#26: The First Lou Episode
What do you know? The first Lou episode on this ranking just so happens to be "The First Lou Episode." Actually, now that I think about it, this might be the only "Lou episode" we've ever gotten, unless you count "The Arctic" and "Trash."
Anyway, this episode is pretty good. Not good enough to top some of my later choices, but that doesn't mean it's bad or even mediocre. Personally, I just think those other episodes have a bit more to offer. My favorite thing about this one though, is the humor.
For those of you who have never read any of my fanfictions, let me tell you, I really love fourth-wall jokes. And for those who have, you probably guessed that already, given how often I utilize them. That being said, this episode has some fairly funny fourth-wall jokes. I especially like the one where they pretend to end the episode and cut to the credits. That gets me every time.
But what really makes the episode work is Lou himself. What can I say, the guy is a riot. The rants he gives about random stuff are entertaining to watch and it makes him more relatable than he needs to be. That's another thing about Lou that makes him a good character: he's not just some crabby landlord with no redeeming qualities. The show makes it clear that he has deep self-esteem issues and just wants to be loved and respected. I dunno, I kinda...feel for him. Not as much as I feel for my sweet baby boy Scissors, of course, but still.
I think the best joke of the episode though, is at the ending. Where during the credits, Lou goes on and on about the creators of the show and is even about to rant about how bad Nickelodeon is. Granted, it gets cut off before he can say anything, but the fact that the showrunners even implied there are things wrong with Nickelodeon shows they have balls of steel. After all, last time someone working for the network expressed an issue with it, they were forced to apologize (Don't worry, Carl. You were in the right, not them.).
Seriously, can we all agree that Nickelodeon is a scummy corporation that mistreats their employees and milks their franchises solely for the purpose to make money? It's companies like this that make Disney look respectful and honest.
Anyway, "I like this episode. End of entry. Put it on wax."
This episode is such a breath of fresh air. Why? Because it's one of the only episodes featuring Paper and Scissors...that doesn't have them competing against each other! Seriously, with how much the show makes these two fight, it's a nice change of pace to see them getting along for once.
So, in this episode, Paper and Scissors are trying to come up with the ultimate weekend story to impress Pencil. Said plans involve skydiving, a band of pacifist pirates, and even knock-off Ninja Turtles. Yeah, this episode is kind of crazy. Meanwhile, Rock decides to spend his weekend...hat shopping. Which the episode hypes up to all heavens. Like, to the point it's the most amazing story ever to Pencil.
Yeah, like "Paper's Secret Weapon" above, the ending kind of ruins this one for me, too. Pencil being so mind-blown by Rock doing something as mundane as buying a hat and then just dismissing whatever Paper had to tell her before he even got a chance to say anything annoyed me. Plus, Rock is a little out-of-character here, rudely butting into Pencil and Paper's conversation and ignoring his friends' phone call in favor of continuing to look for a hat. I know Rock is an idiot, but every other time Paper and Scissors are in danger, he'll drop everything to help them, which we'll see in our next entry.
Other than those issues though, I really did like this episode, if for nothing else, the fact that Paper and Scissors work together for a change. Also, the Pre-Teen Modified Martial Arts Tortoises are cool, even if they're only on screen for less than a minute. I liked the non-conflict pirates as well, hoping to see them make another appearance someday.
Yet another "Paper vs the world" episode. Unlike the others I've listed so far, this one at the very least has a positive outcome.
What I can appreciate about this one is how it acknowledges the characters'...species? Not sure if that's the word I should use, but eh. And when I say it acknowledges their "species," I don't just mean it points out what they are like "National Paper Day" did; it actually displays a certain character's abilities/shortcomings based on what they are. In this case, Paper is well...a piece of paper. That means he is extremely lightweight and can easily be blown away by just the slightest breeze. This episode actually takes advantage of that weakness and that's something I admire.
With other shows in a similar vein, like Regular Show, the characters' identities are rarely brought up. Sure, Rigby sometimes runs on all fours because he's a raccoon, but Mordecai being a bird is never really mentioned or shown; as far as I can tell, he can't even fly. It's episodes like these that show the choices on what a character should physically be don't have to be arbitrary. And what's even better is that Paper's not the only one whose identity is put on display as Rock and Scissors each get their own reminders of what they are in "Car Wash" and "Scissors' Catapult" respectively. But more on those episodes later.
So, in this episode, Paper ends up becoming victim to a light wind and finds himself helpless against its "power." While Rock and Scissors attempt to rescue him, Paper's sister, Sandpaper, reminds him that he's stronger than he thinks he is. This leads to an awesome moment of Paper turning himself into an airplane and somehow surviving a paper shredder factory (not even going to question why that's a thing).
I think what I like most about this episode is how everyone actually cares about Paper's wellbeing for once. Rock flipping out and acting like a concerned parent isn't just hilarious, it's downright adorable. And Sandpaper's tough love and motivational speech make her one of the best sisters on Nickelodeon. I'm serious, she might be better than any of the Loud sisters. As for Scissors...well, he's being Scissors. At the very least, he's trying to save Paper...even if it's just to boost his own ego.
The only thing that I don't like about this episode is the stupidity of literally everyone else. First of all, they close their shops just because it's a nice day out. I know that was only put in for the sake of the plot (make it so Paper can't get inside to escape the wind), but I can only imagine how often they do this and how much money their businesses have lost because of it. Second of all, every person in town except the Rocham Bros and Sandpaper become extremely paranoid that there is an invisible force out to get them...to the point they send in the military. It's not really funny to me, it's just...whatever.
Other than that, good episode.
Yeah, yeah, it's yet yet another "Paper against the world" episode. Don't worry, this will hopefully be the last one for a while.
So, in this episode, Paper decides to break away from his role as "the serious one" in the Trio and pulls a prank on Rock. Said prank involves the titular "glitter bomb" blowing up in Rock's face and making him rather...uncharacteristically angry. And I absolutely love it.
There's just something about nice, calm characters losing it that's funny to me. And Rock snapping because of something as simple as getting glitter all over himself is no exception. Also, nice subtle joke: "Paper covers Rock...in glitter." Genius.
Anyway, Rock eventually finds out Paper was the one who sent him the bomb and proceeds to hunt him down, threatening to fold Paper up and tape him so he can't be undone. Wow, they're acknowledging the characters' "species" again. This forces Paper to go on the run as if he were a serial killer being tracked by the police and he ends up in Alaska of all places (surprised they didn't go with Canada, but I guess Nickelodeon learned their lesson after The Loud House faced backlash for when they poked fun at the poor country). Of course, Rock eventually finds him and right when he's about to make Paper's life a living hell, it's revealed him getting mad was all an elaborate prank of his own and everyone else was in on it. And believe it or not, that's why I find this better than all of the other "Paper vs. the world" episodes.
In every other episode I've mentioned already (sans "The Wind"), everyone seems to legitimately be against Paper for something stupid, whether it be disliking fart jokes, being too nice in a prank war, or even trying to win an invention fair. Here, Paper is being chastised...for doing a glitter bomb prank. Which is another equally stupid reason to turn against him. But the fact that it turns out the whole thing is a joke meant to "teach him a lesson" sort of makes it more tolerable. In a way, it's like how I feel about "Sound of Silence" vs. how I feel about "No Such Luck," where because in the former episode. the Loud sisters are deliberately against Lincoln to teach him a lesson, it makes it easier to forgive them as opposed to the latter where they're treating him bad out of selfishness.
I'm not saying Rock and Scissors didn't take things too far here. They absolutely did. They didn't really need to have Paper hide out in Alaska for months, they could have just had Rock "finish the job" at the prison. But as we all know, the journey is more important than the destination. And the journey we get here is well worth it. Some of the jokes here had me laughing my ass off, especially when Paper tries to hide his glitter hands by whacking his head over a cash register. It's just pure delight all the way through.
Also, Dreamscape returns in this episode. And he is awesome.
Yep. It's the "weird fetish" episode. Honestly, I don't understand why people think that. Yeah, Scissors is shown wearing a diaper on a box, but he never actually wears one in the episode. It's not really enough to conclude that the writers have a kink is what I'm saying.
As for the episode itself, it's mostly good. I say "mostly" because there are a few things that bothered me about it. Number one, this line from Paper:
"It's odd how you helped someone you barely know and have never done anything nice for us."
What the hell are you talking about, Paper? Scissors has done nice things for you! What about when he helped Rock win against Big Turkey? And when he helped you come up with a good weekend story to tell Pencil? You even reference the former in this episode! For a show with such strong continuity, it's amazing what moments they choose to forget.
Then there's the scene where Scissors gets mobbed by people trying to buy the diapers and he says:
"What are you people even using these for?!"
Gee, I dunno Scissors. Maybe they all have babies who tend to get extreme cases of diarrhea? Just an idea.
Besides those minor issues though, I did like this episode a lot. I like Scissors' little character arc. I like the running gag with Rock and Paper's intern freaking out from the stresses of his job. I like how they tied the two storylines together in the end. There's a lot more good than bad here and it's shocking to me that people dislike this episode more than "The Fart Joke Debate." No, it's not the greatest episode ever. Obviously. But the fact that everyone dismisses it so easily just because the title is "Diapers," proves that they're too willing to judge a book by its cover. Maybe actually watch the episode sometime, is all I'm saying.
This one's just a classic.
So, in order to avoid his responsibilities, Scissors gets a catapult and uses it to get rid of all his problems. This comes back to bite him when a man who paid him to mow his lawn and didn't receive the service returns and demands he finish the job. Long story short, Scissors doesn't and this results in a visit from his future self, showing him the consequences of his actions, and the large man growing so large that he uses Scissors as a pair of scissors to cut his grass.
Wow, that description was...a lot.
But in all seriousness, this episode is just fun. Kevin is such an over-the-top character and his obsession with "the lawn thing" to the point he ignores everything else, including his wife and kids, is surprisingly funny. And no matter what, you gotta admire the guy's determination to get Scissors to do his job. Honestly, if I paid someone to do something and they never did it, I'd probably hunt them down and make them do it, too. Not to the extent that Kevin does, of course. I would just go up to them and ask "Hey, you know that thing I paid you to do like a month ago? Well, you never did it. So...can you?" I'm such a pushover. XD
Also, I like how in spite of Scissors trying to get out of his responsibilities, he at the very least attempts to mow the lawn. That's pretty commendable, especially since the episode outright shows he doesn't learn his lesson in the end. That's the thing about Scissors that makes his character work so well to me; it's nice to watch him learn from his mistakes, but when he doesn't, the writers make sure to punish him for it. And they make sure to do that here by showcasing his future going down the toilet.
If there's one thing I don't like about this episode it's that Rock and Paper have diminished roles. Sure, Rock tries to act as the voice of reason for Scissors at first, but then he just drops from the story entirely. And Paper isn't involved in the story at all; his role is essentially to be a catalyst for jokes. And even though they imply he's going to get his own subplot when he becomes obsessed with the catapult, it never goes anywhere, unfortunately. Besides that, this episode is great.
Hey, why are you still reading this? MOW MY LAWN!!!
It's Pencil and Potato, one of them's smart
Pencil and Potato, the other one's me
Will they survive or end up dead?
This entire theme song is in Potato's head!
And yeah, that pretty much sums up this episode. Who would have guessed Potato's second appearance would end up being miles better than her first?
So yeah, the plot of this episode is basically just Pencil and Potato getting lost together while the Rocham Bros are off helping some E.T. knockoff find love. Yeah...don't ask me how they ended up in this situation, they never explain. Looks like Potato's catchphrase really is appropriate here because "I don't even know how they got here."
But either way, this episode serves as a day in the limelight for both Pencil and Potato, two characters who were previously portrayed as nothing more than Mary Sues, the former because she was just a shallow love interest, and the latter for being adored by everyone. Here though, they're portrayed as flawed individuals with more realistic personalities. Pencil is shown that, despite being a genius, she doesn't have all the answers and is just as prone to being in over her head as Paper is. Meanwhile, instead of being praised for existing, Potato is treated like any other person who is acting like a nuisance. Speaking of that, it's really satisfying to see Pencil get a taste of what Paper had to deal with in Potato's debut. Guess hanging out with her all the time wasn't as great as you thought it was, huh?
I can't really think of much else to say, this episode is just fun and funny. However, there is one thing I didn't like and that's the Rocham Bros' treatment of Pencil. The fact that they just up and abandon her for very little reason and then proceed to procrastinate on their "goal" just because, makes them come across as idiotic and selfish. Which is totally in-character for Rock and Scissors respectively, but Paper? I'm sorry, I just don't believe that he would be okay with leaving the love of his life behind to potentially die. Other than that, I loved this episode.
Why is the song so damn catchy? I still get it stuck in my head to this day. Granted, it's not the best song the show has to offer. We'll get to that later...
Here we have another case of a character's "species" being acknowledged and treated in a realistic way. Rock gets fired from his car wash job because his heaviness causes damage to all the cars that come through (Too bad it's not "International Rock Day," otherwise, they'd probably just brush it off and call Rock the greatest thing ever). So, he is forced to get another job working for a corporation run by evil robots. And because Rock is Rock, he isn't aware of the robots' plans and just thinks they're running a normal business. However, Paper and Scissors are a bit quicker on the uptake and disguise themselves as robots to infiltrate the business and prove to Rock that the company has bad intentions...
..Ha, ha! Just kidding. They do it to prove which of them is smarter. Because yeah, it's one of the many episodes where Paper and Scissors compete against each other. To tell you the truth though, I actually don't mind it much here. Why? Because their competitiveness actually contributes to the main plot. If the episode made their little competition a subplot that had nothing to do with anything, I probably would find it annoying. But the fact that it's important to Rock's story is what makes it work for me.
I also really like how the robots end up reforming in the end, even though the episode could have just as easily kept them evil for the sake of a joke. But instead of trying to be funny, they teach the message that anyone can be good as long as they put in the effort. There's also the moral that treating people with kindness may be enough to turn someone from bad to good. Once again, they could have inverted this by having the robots stay evil and making Rock's kindness toward them all for nought, but they opt for the heartwarming message rather than the mean-spirited humor. And that's always going to rank an episode high in my book.
Another classic. The title kind of explains what happens, really. Paper invites Pencil over to the Rocham Bros' apartment for a movie night. But Pencil suggests watching a horror movie, which Paper is clearly uncomfortable with. So, he borrows Pencil's "reality-augmenting" goggles while watching the movie, only to end up grabbing a pair that brings all of his nightmares to life. Hilarity ensues.
I especially love this episode because of how it ties up the loose ends of "Paper's Big Lie," an episode that ended with Paper deciding to keep lying to Pencil, even if it comes back to bite him in the butt. This episode not only brings up that episode and references its plot, but it resolves the conflict that the ending of that episode chose to ignore. I honestly was not expecting the writers to even attempt to address the issue.
Like in "Paper's Big Lie," another big highlight here is his relationship with Pencil. I can tell the two of them have a lot of chemistry (ha, ha, get it? They're both scientists?) and the way they interact with each other is wholesome. I also think it's very sweet when we find out Pencil enjoys hanging out with Paper, despite his inferior intelligence and despite how much he lied to her. It shows that no matter what, she likes him for who he is, which considering how often Paper is abused in the show, it's such a great "Throw the Dog a Bone" moment.
There's a lot of good jokes here, too. Too many to name off the top of my head, but my favorites are the ones involving the goggles. That oatmeal scene, man. Like...you could tell by the way Thomas Lennon delivered the line that he knew what he was doing. Also, when Paper puts on the goggles that make him see his ideal self and he just sees Scissors? Yeah, the showrunners ship them. No question.
Speaking of Scissors, he's the one thing holding this episode back from a higher spot. He's kind of a jerk here, constantly putting Paper down and trying to humiliate him in front of Pencil. It's hard to blame Paper for not caring about him getting eaten by the nightmare monster when the guy spent the whole episode poking fun at him. Although...perhaps Scissors' actions here are less about making a fool out of Paper and more about getting Pencil out of the way of their relationship? Just a thought...
#17: The Astonishing Catalina
Ah, another formidable antagonist for the Rocham Bros. Actually, that's a bit of an understatement. Catalina may very well be the best villain in the entire show. Seriously, she puts Dreamscape to shame.
While Dreamscape relies mainly on wits and the assistance of others, Catalina doesn't require any help whatsoever. Why would she? She's got magic!
Besides that though, Catalina is more than just petty like Georgie or over-the-top like Dreamscape. She's conniving, manipulative, and acts like such an attention whore that it ends up being funny to me. Huh. She really is a lot like Scissors. Maybe that's why I like her so much...
Something else that makes Catalina better than those previous villains? She's actually a threat to the characters' lives. Dreamscape is obviously evil, but...his goal is to make people sleepy. He's not really hurting anyone in the long run. And Georgie just decides who's cool and who isn't. Again, nobody gets hurt, at least not physically. Catalina, on the other hand, has magical powers that include giving a horse flight and fire-breathing abilities, summoning lightning from nowhere, and being able to banish people to some sort of purgatory forever. When she's on screen, I can tell the characters are in legitimate danger and that really ramps up the tension.
In short, if Catalina doesn't get at least one other appearance, I'm writing an angry letter to Nickelodeon.
Also, I love the bit about Scissors stealing marathon runners' glory because it's another subtle joke. Of course the other competitors lost...that's what happens when you run with Scissors.
Here we have another episode where they chose the moral over humor.
In this episode, our lovable trio take an online quiz that tells them what character they are from some sitcom that we've never heard about until now. Before taking the quiz, Rock predicts his result will be "Dave," a character who is essentially him in a wig. Actually, no. Not essentially. Dave IS just Rock in a wig. Yeah, the character design for Dave is kind of lazy, but I think it's intentional here, since Rock is making a point about how similar he is to him.
Anyway, Rock ends up not getting Dave and instead his results are a weird skunk character that no one likes. Which definitely makes you wonder what answers Rock gave to get such results. Then again, I'm pretty sure the quiz is messed up since Lou, who is clearly more of a "Creepo" than Rock, gets Dave. But whether or not the quiz is broken isn't really the point.
Rock tries desperately to prove he isn't like Creepo only to be proven wrong at every turn. Meanwhile, it turns out Paper lied about his own result just to fit in with the crowd and when Scissors finds out, he attempts to drop him...in a pit of lava. Okay...that's a bit much, don't you think? Uh, Sandpaper? You gonna say something about them dumping your brother into lava? No? You're just gonna stand there? Okay.
Thankfully, Rock ends up saving the day by broadcasting to everyone that nobody should let an online quiz dictate who they are, a honest-to-god good message. I mean, I don't know too many people who take online quizzes and actually believe they are the result they get, but being insecure about how others think of you is a very real issue. What's most important is to not let the opinion of others make you change yourself just to fit in or impress others. As long as you're happy with who you are as a person, that's all that matters in the end. The episode makes that clear and I can respect that.
Also, as a bonus, Dave mentions he has a husband to Rock and the latter accepts it with no question. Representation for the win!
Why do all of the Rock episodes have such good morals attached to them? Like, even "Bowling" had one and that episode is close to the bottom for me.
Let's start with the things I didn't like. Number one, Paper is an idiot. Well, he's always an idiot, but here, he's so stupid, he can't tell what Rock is feeling because he has no eyebrows...even though he should still be able to tell based on Rock's tone and the fact that Rock literally says he's "freaking out." Number two, the writing is forced. Scissors hires two actors to play his friends because one of them says "I could play a rock or a piece of paper." That alone wouldn't bother me except the two claim it's a common expression. Um...no it's not! You just said it because it's convenient to the plot! And finally, Scissors' kooky geography expert being revealed as a figment of the former's imagination. Which I can believe, given that nobody else looks in the guy's direction when he talks, but...does that mean the helicopter Scissors is flying in at the end is a figment of his imagination, too? Or did Scissors hijack a helicopter and is really flying it himself? I don't know, it's never explained.
With those nitpicks out of the way, we can talk about the many things I loved about this episode. Number one, the humor. The highlights this time around are Scissors acting like a controlling employer to some temple monster and the monster just going along with it for no reason, Rock acting like a parent towards Scissors when he's misbehaving in public, and Paper's robotic eyebrows collectively exploding at the same time, creating a worldwide fireworks show. Number two, the moral. Rock learns that even if he's struggling, that doesn't mean he should give up and that he just needs to keep trying to make it in the world. He even offers the advice to Paper when his eyebrow inventions inevitably explode, which is just a heartwarming moment. And that brings us to number three, the emotional bits. Not only did I feel for Rock when he was rejected in favor of robots, but I really felt for Scissors when his insecurities were brought up and he started crying as a result. Like, OMG! I just wanna give him a hug!
Overall, not the best episode ever, but it's one I will gladly rewatch over and over again. Now let's go, Mr. Scissors! Parking is a nightmare!
Ah, yes. The episode that gave us Beta Potato. No, seriously. I'm not the only one who thinks Putty is just Potato if she was even dumber and had less of a personality, right?
But even if Putty is a lesser version of Potato in my eyes, I can't help but love him. He's just a calm, easygoing guy who seems to be in his own little world...either that or he's perpetually stoned off his mind. Actually, if you watch the episode with that interpretation, it's even funnier.
Despite Putty's less-than-appealing demeanor, the Rocham Bros absolutely adore and admire him...to the point each of them are worried he will get replaced by the brainless, pink blob. We even get to hear the trio's fears and insecurities. It comes across as extremely relatable to anyone who's ever been "that" person in their friend group. You know, the one who feels like they have nothing to offer compared to the others and wonders why they're even part of the group? Even if you don't have a group of friends, I think all of us have felt insecure and compared ourselves to others once in a while.
So naturally, like most occurrences of this plot, all three Rocham Bros believe they're being kicked out of the trio and make sure to be as vague as possible about the situation when talking to each other as to avoid a premature resolution to the episode. The three move out and it's implied that months go by...either that or they've just been having crazy weather. I'm gonna go with the latter, since nobody else in the building has gone to check on the trio or questioned why they are gone. I mean, Lou probably wouldn't care that much, but you'd think Pencil would at least be a little concerned about her friends' absence.
Anyway, the trio end up reuniting at a grocery store and it's revealed that Scissors got bangs and the other two got...wigs, I guess (nice reference, btw) as a result of their breakup (the episode's words, not mine.) And it's there where they finally communicate to each other about being kicked out. Took 'em long enough. Then we get a pretty decent climax of the trio racing back to their apartment to claim the "two empty spots," sabotaging each other on the way (not sure why they're all insistent on getting there first, since all that matters is not being last, but whatever). And can I just say how clever it is how they invert the game this entire show's premise is based on? What I mean is, they have Scissors sabotage Rock, Rock sabotage Paper, and Paper sabotage Scissors...all of which are the complete opposite of how the game is supposed to go. Oh, and we also get a Mario Kart reference. That's pretty cool.
And the episode ends with one of the most heartwarming moments in the entire series: the trio realizing that none of them could ever be replaced because they all love each other too much. AWWWWWW!!!!! And even better, they still try to include Putty in their little friend group. Double AWWWWWW!!!!! Granted, they end up kicking Putty out when they realize he's not that great of a friend after all and the trio immediately forget how irreplaceable they are when they start worrying about Pencil taking their spots, but still. AWWWWWW!!!!!
It's episodes like these that prove this series has a lot more worth than people think it does. It's these episodes that show how despite it all, the Rocham-bros are as close as friends get. They may go through a lot of hardships and engage in not-so-friendly competition a lot of the time, but at the end of the day, they all love each other. Forgotten aesop aside, this episode will always rank high for me.
And now, to end this entry, let's list Putty's best lines in the episode:
"Ahahaha, yeah..."
"The secret is avocado."
"You guys are the best."
"Guys, look. A bowtie."
And of course...wait. I guess that's it. Yeah. There's no more. Oh well. Moving on!
Sandpaper's debut really was a big highlight, wasn't it?
As I mentioned in "The Wind," Sandpaper is a great character. On the surface, she seems like your typical action girl who's perfect in every way and only exists to make the male characters look inferior. But as this episode shows us, that's not really the case. Sure, most of the time she's showing up her brother, or in this episode's case, Scissors, and proving she's better than them. But one, that's not intentional on her part, and two, Paper and Scissors are going to look worse than any character placed next to them. And also, Scissors is bringing his embarrassment on himself, given how he's constantly trying to show off in front of Sandpaper...not that that makes me feel any less bad for him. Like, he acts like a complete baby and I still want to hug and comfort him and kiss his boo-boos. :(
But anyway, back to Sandpaper. I have to say, of the three main female characters, her, Pencil, and Potato, I think she's my favorite of them. And I can hear you saying: "She's the counterpart to Scissors, of course you like her the best." Actually, that's not the reason I like her more than the other two. Or at least..it's not the only reason.
You see, unlike Pencil and Potato, who were portrayed as Mary Sues in their first appearances, Sandpaper actually doesn't come off as a Mary Sue in her first appearance. Well...okay, maybe she does a little. After all, she's strong, she's skillful, she's famous...sounds like all the qualities a Mary Sue has. But here's the thing; Sandpaper's not perfect. The episode knows Sandpaper is not perfect. And that's showcased with how she interacts with Paper.
In the episode, Paper is trying to get limes for a pie needed for "Roommate Appreciation Day" (super cute how they made that a holiday) and despite telling Sandpaper repeatedly they don't need to be so extravagant in the way they go about getting the limes, she is persistent in doing things her way. And inevitably, her way gets the Rocham Bros into trouble. If she were really a Mary Sue, her way would be right 100% of the time. But it's not. Instead, she puts her brother and his friends in danger due to her own stubbornness, which is a very real flaw. And even better, she actually admits fault and tries to make up for it. To me, that's what makes her a better sister than the Loud sisters. Most of the time, when the Loud sisters are in the wrong, they don't admit fault and instead, it's Lincoln who has to learn to put up with their antics. But Sandpaper actually takes responsibility for her actions and goes out of her way to correct her mistakes, which is very mature.
To be honest, the humor in this episode isn't that great, most of it just being bad puns. But what it lacks in jokes, it makes up for in heart. That appreciation speech Paper gives to Sandpaper in the end is a real tear jerker. In a good way, though. Even the little things about this episode are great, like Scissors being shown sweeping the apartment in the beginning (you probably missed it because whoever uploaded the video to the Google Drive cut that part out). When I saw that, I couldn't help but think: "Awww! How sweet! He finally learned to help!" Oh wait...that episode came before that one. So...I guess he forgot how to help? Eh. Still a wholesome moment.
#12: Six Pieces of Turkey
Speaking of sister episodes, here we have the sister episode's sister episode, which just so happens to be my favorite Rock episode.
The plot this time around is Rock is upset about a TV dinner advertising itself as having...you guessed it, six pieces of turkey, even though the box only has four inside. To anyone else, this would be a minor annoyance, but to Rock, it's a full-on political issue. In fact, the picture matching the box is so important to him that he stages a protest to convince the higher-ups to change it. What's even better is that Rock is really the only one who cares about this matter, making everyone else act as the straight man to him.
Here's the thing, though; even though Rock's complaints are insignificant to everyone around him, the episode still does a good job of convincing the audience to root for him and want him to succeed. And that's partly due to how good of a character Rock is.
Throughout the series, Rock has been shown to be a kind, caring person. He's always looking out for others. He puts the needs of his friends before his own. And he's even willing to help out someone he's never met. Not only that, but as Paper put it in the previous episode, he's "passionate about what [he] want(s) and [he'll] keep pushing until [he] get(s) it." Because of this, we want Rock to always come out on top and when he does, it's very satisfying. Even in episodes I didn't like, like "Bowling," seeing Rock win gives me a good feeling. It's no different here.
What's even better is how Rock wins in this episode. After Scissors sabotages Rock's protest, he gets an epiphany where he goes through a similar situation of a cover lying to him and agrees to right his own wrongs. And let me tell you, if there's one thing I love more than watching Rock succeed, it's Scissors learning from his mistakes, showing he's not the selfish jerkwad people assume he is. Well...okay, he is a selfish jerkwad. But he's my selfish jerkwad...
The song is pretty good, too, but it's still not the best one. I promise we'll get to it soon...
Let me start by saying...AWWW SCISSORS IS SO ADORABLE I LOVE HIM SHOWING OFF HIS IMAGINARY BICEPS AND THEN PRETENDING TO BE ALL TOUGH WHEN HE'S OBVIOUSLY FREEZING I WANT TO HUG HIM AND CUDDLE HIM AND GIVE HIM KISSES ALL OVER HIS BODY OMG HE'S SO CUTE I CAN'T STAND IT I LOVE HIM EEEEEEE!!!!!!!
...Ahem. Sorry about that.
Anyway, the rest of the episode is just okay. The jokes are average, Lou's subplot was unnecessary but entertaining enough. The climax with all the animals "assembling" was weird but alright. The sole reason I gave this episode such a high ranking is because of Scissors alone. Like, MY GOD HE'S SUCH A CUTIE-PATOOTIE HE DESERVES THE WORLD I WISH HE WAS REAL SO I COULD MARRY HIM AND GIVE HIM ALL THE LOVE HE EVER WANTED SCISSORS YOU'RE MY SOLE REASON FOR LIVING BE WITH ME FOREVER!!!!!!
...Sheesh. I have a serious problem, don't I? XD
#10: The Other Rock Paper Scissors
This episode is just delightful.
So, this time around, our lovable trio discover that there's another trio just like them...only better. They're nicer, smarter, more talented, and overall more enjoyable to be around. This makes the OG three feel self-conscious about themselves, so they try to make themselves better...to not much success. In the end, though, they discover another trio that's even worse than they are and they decide to accept their shortcomings. That's it. That's the entire episode.
A couple of reasons I placed this one so high: number one, its relatability. It's very easy to sympathize with the Rocham Bros, but especially if you've ever met someone whom you think is better than you. Because the fact is, no matter how good you think you are, there's always going to be someone who outperforms you. And while self-improvement is important, it's also important to love yourself and not compare yourself to others. Which, the trio kind of learns in the end.
The second thing that makes this episode great is how it serves as a "Take That!" to not just preschool cartoons, but adult cartoons as well. The better Rock-Paper-Scissors are meant to be a parody of protagonists in shows made for young kids, with their overly cute designs; their perfect, ethically good lifestyles; and their need to outright state morals out of belief their audience wouldn't pick up on them themselves. Meanwhile, the worse Rock-Paper-Scissors give the impression that most adult animation just involves ugly character designs, violence, and morally abhorrent actions. It's like a commentary on television this day and age.
This is also one of the first episodes that includes call-backs to past episodes. In this case, it references the previous episode in the ranking. which means we get to see Scissors acting cute in that tank top again (LOL, of course he didn't learn his lesson). Even though he shouldn't have the tank top since he gave it to Lou. I guess he bought another one using the money he got from suing all those people.
I hope one of these days we get to see the Better or Worse Rock-Paper-Scissors again. Although, I doubt it since I'm pretty sure they were written to be one-shots. Sigh..I'm gonna miss Babo, the sign-language gorilla. He really is an angel...
But yeah, see Teen Titans Go? This is how you take potshots at other media correctly. I hope you're writing this down.
Let's be real; you all knew this one was going to be close to the top spot. Everyone's talked about this finale and everyone loves it. And I can see why. It's funny, it's action-packed, it's got celebrity guest stars. It's everything you would want in a season finale.
However...this is probably going to trigger some people but...I don't think it quite deserves all the hype it gets.
This episode is great, I love it a lot. I can easily call it my second-favorite "half-hour special," if that's what you wanna call it. But there's a few things holding it back from being the absolute best. Number one is Rock's side plot. Despite the entire apartment being overflowing with garbage, his priority is creating a fantasy-romance between the Recyclable Prince and Garbage Princess, who have some sort of forbidden love going on due to the war between their two kingdoms. That alone isn't the issue. The issue is that Rock is trying to get the two together to fulfill his own selfish desires...which seems a little out of character to me. In any other episode, Rock is eager to help anyone out of the kindness of his heart. As we saw in "Bowling," he's helped many folks for no other reason than because he thinks it's the right thing to do.
Another problem is the way the episode caters to Scissors in the end. Throughout the whole thing, Paper is portrayed as being in the wrong for wanting Scissors to get off his lazy ass and do his chores. Don't get me wrong, I love the guy with all my heart (in case I didn't make that clear in the previous entries), but that doesn't mean I tolerate everything he does. Let's just say if I lived with him and he pulled this crap with me, I wouldn't be as patient as Paper was in this episode. In fact, I would personally make his life a living hell until he did what I wanted. What? It's called tough love, Sandpaper taught me that. However, the episode wants us to think Scissors is completely innocent and it's Paper's fault everything went to hell because he wouldn't buck up and do Scissors' chore for him. Their neighbor, Dian, even has the nerve to chew him, and only him, out for the trash's escalation, despite the fact that Rock could have done it too if he wasn't so distracted with his fantasy-romance.
Here's the thing about Paper: one of his many flaws is that he often puts honor before reason in most scenarios and here, it's turned up to 11. He is so insistent on not taking out the trash that he admits he'd sooner die than do it. Which I'll admit, is an incredibly stupid thing to say. At the same time though, I can't really blame Paper for not wanting to do Scissors' work. I've never had a roommate before, but if there's one thing I know from watching sitcoms and such, it's that lazy roommates are less likely to do their part if you constantly do it for them. Paper taking out the trash for Scissors is only going to make his laziness worse, as the latter is going to come to expect the former to do his chore every time because he's more willing to do it than him. Paper giving in to Scissors is not only enabling his behavior, but it creates extra work for Paper. So, I'm sorry Dian, but you blaming Paper for trying to get out of additional chores when he has enough already is unreasonable and unfair.
Speaking of Dian, her and her husband, Chris, suffer from what I like to call "Remember the New Guy?" syndrome. They're characters who are portrayed as having always been around but we've never seen them until now. The way they're introduced here makes it sound like the writers expect the audience to know who they are, when really, we're just seeing two random people show up out of nowhere and get involved in the plot, even though they don't need to be. Their only real reason for existing, as far as I can tell, is to give Wanda Sykes a celebrity appearance. They didn't need to be here and the episode would have worked without them.
So, yeah. Based on that long-winded rant, you probably think I hate this episode, right? Um. No. I don't. As I said, I love it a lot. If I didn't, I wouldn't have put it this high in my ranking. Just because I have criticisms for something doesn't automatically mean I don't like it. The truth is, the stuff I didn't like is minimal compared to the stuff I did.
Even though I don't like Rock's motivation to resolve the issues between the Garbage and Recyclable kingdoms, I love the conflict that's presented. "Romeo and Juliet" type stories may seem tired and cliche, but personally, I can't get enough of them. The relationship between the Garbage Princess and Recyclable Prince is really adorable and I especially like how the former is portrayed as a stereotypical princess at first and then turns into a badass warrior in the last few minutes. Yeah, the princess being an action hero is another favorite trope of mine. That's probably why I like the Mario movie so much, since they made Peach more action-oriented than she usually is. Speaking of the Garbage Princess though, did anyone else notice that she and Recyclables Prince are the only ones not visibly seen being thrown away? Makes me wonder if the two of them escaped somehow. Anyone wanna write a fanfic about that?
All of the other characters we get introduced to are awesome as well. My favorite has to be Steven ShadowWhispers (still a better name than Jonathan Fartjoke) Anyway, he's funny and even though he ended up getting trashed in the end, I hope we see him again someday. Oh, and then there's Lou's little romance with the Garbage Queen. It's not a focal point or anything, but just the fact that someone would consider being with Lou is heartwarming, considering how little everyone thinks of him, including himself. Let's face it, the guy deserves some love in his life.
The humor is fairly good, too. I especially like the garbage kingdom's version of the "Convenient News Reporter." Also, the bit where Paper and Scissors are running from The Trash and Paper tries to find out if Scissors has a Freudian excuse for not taking it out. But no, he just doesn't like doing chores. I mean, no duh. I could've told you that. And of course, the ending where Scissors gets punished by Paper throwing him out with the garbage, which he admittedly deserved. I guess you could say Paper "dumped" him, LOL.
So yeah, I enjoyed this one. I just didn't enjoy it as much as others. As far as half-hour specials go, there is one that I find better than this. Stay tuned to find out...
It's another episode in the genre of "Paper and Scissors competing against each other" and one of the best in that regard. Not the absolute best, but it's a close second.
This time around, Paper is trying to earn people's respect by impersonating a doctor. Um...he does know that's illegal right? Like, if he gets caught, he could be in serious trouble. Who am I kidding, the laws are skewed beyond belief in this world. As long as Paper doesn't lie about his birthday, he'll be fine.
Anyway, Scissors rightly points out that Paper shouldn't be trying to get respect by pretending to be something he's not and that no one is actually going to believe he's a doctor...almost as if he forgot what show he's in. Of course everyone's going to buy that he's a doctor, the same way everyone buys that Scissors is a famous basketball player, despite looking nothing like him. The people in this show are morons. They'll believe anything if the plot demands it.
So, as I mentioned, Scissors dresses up as Ronald Jameson, a basketball player, in order to teach Paper a lesson. And then the rest of the episode is pretty much the two of them sabotaging each other. Oh, and Rock suddenly thinks he's a sage and starts attempting to reach "enlightenment" or whatever with the real Ronald Jameson. To be honest, I don't care too much about that part.
I think what makes this episode so good to me is how the writers make it clear that we're not supposed to take a side here. While in "Hide and Seek," we want Paper to succeed and in "Resolutions" we're rooting for Scissors, here both of them are shown to be in the wrong and the episode implies we're not supposed to want either of them to win. Even still, I like how they balance out the feud by giving both sides little victories as the episode goes on. And of course, the ending where the two make up is sweet and gives us a good moral on top of the whole thing.
There's a few things I didn't care for, like the aforementioned subplot with Rock, but also the running joke of a random boy getting mistaken for a pair of scissors even though he obviously looks nothing like a pair of scissors. Like, it'd be funnier if he did look like scissors and he kept denying it, but otherwise it just feels like some inside joke I'm not in on.
Besides that, I love this episode. Oh, and Paper is not a doctor XD.
AWWW SCISSORS BROKE HIS ARM MY POOR BABY I WANNA MAKE HIM ALL BETTER HE REALLY NEEDS A HUG LIKE I WANNA HUG HIM BUT I'M WORRIED THAT WILL PUT HIM IN MORE PAIN WHY IS HE SO ADORABLE IT DRIVES ME INSANE HOW CUTE HE IS OMG!!!!!!!!
...Why do I keep doing that?
So yeah, the plot of this episode is Scissors breaks his arm after going down the titular sled hill, which Paper warns him not to do because it's dangerous. Wow, in spite of everything we've seen, Paper does care about Scissors' wellbeing at the end of the day. Actually, I think this whole episode is a big showcase of "Aww, They Really Do Love Each Other" as Scissors displays genuine concern when Paper melts down near the end.
Anywho, instead of telling Paper about his injury, Scissors decides to hide it in fear that Paper is going to brag about how he was right. Fair enough, I guess. Although...does he really need to go so far as to hide his injury? Can't he just...I don't know, lie and tell Paper he broke his arm in some other way? I'm just saying, that probably would have saved him from a whole lot of pain.
Either way, Paper informs Scissors that he feels bad about being such a mother hen and offers to take him to an amusement park known for being extreme and overtly dangerous. Scissors, instead of just telling the truth or coming up with another elaborate lie about his arm, decides to go along with it. Yeah, he's kind of stupid in this episode. But at the same time, it works because he's getting punished for being stubborn. In fact, if I didn't know any better, I'd say this whole thing was a ruse by Paper to teach Scissors a lesson. Then again, I doubt Paper would be smart enough to come up with that. But even though Scissors kinda brought his pain upon himself, I still can't help but feel bad for him LIKE OMG I JUST WANNA HOLD HIM AND CUDDLE HIM AND TAKE CARE OF HIM AND-
...Okay, okay. No more "obsessive fangirl mode," I promise.
The episode ends with Scissors in a full body cast admitting the truth out of guilt of making Paper worried. And then...we get the best song in the entire show: Paper's "I Was Right" song. There are no words to describe how much I love this song. Not only is it catchy and fun, but it's memetic. I've seen videos on TikTok where people lipsync to this song and I love it. It's bittersweet though, as each time I scroll through the comments, nobody seems to know where the song is from, meaning I have to be that one person who gets the joke when no one else does.
Seriously, everyone in the RPS fandom: if you see a video that uses this song and nobody in the comments gets the reference, let them know. The sooner people hear about the show, the higher its popularity will get. And the sooner that happens, the sooner we'll get more seasons. Do it. NOW!
And now, we get to, in my opinion, the best "Paper vs. Scissors" episode. So, previously, I talked about how most episodes about Paper being unfairly punished annoyed me. But if there's any time where I want to see him fall on his face, it's here, because he really grabs the Jerkass Ball in this episode.
The plot is that Paper continually makes fun of Scissors for failing to complete his New Years' resolution. Which honestly, isn't that big of a deal. I think all of us have made at least one resolution that we weren't able to fulfill. But Paper goes on and on about how Scissors should be ashamed of his failure and how so much better he is because he's about to complete his own resolution.
You're probably wondering, what resolution did Scissors procrastinate on to make Paper act like such a petty jerk to him? He failed to lift 450 lbs. And why did Scissors make such an unrealistic resolution in the first place? He saw an "inspirational sports movie" about a buff guy lifting 450 lbs. Naturally, Scissors being Scissors, does end up trying at first...only to give up like he always does and just eat some chocolate cake instead. God, how can a character trying to do something nobody can relate to still be so relatable?!
Anyway, why Scissors makes the resolution isn't the point because throughout the episode, I still felt for him. The guy already suffers from self-esteem issues, so imagine how horrible he must feel when it seems like everyone else is better and stronger than him. Even without Paper's jeering, we can see just how distraught Scissors is at being weak and helpless. And the scene where he's eating cake while rewatching the movie and a single tear falls off his cheek? AWWW I JUST WANNA-
No. I promised no more fangirling. So no more fangirling.
All of this leads up to one of the best endings the show has to offer. Scissors, using built-up rage caused by Paper's endless teasing, effortlessly picks up the 450lb calculator the latter was building for his resolution and throws it through the apartment's wall and onto the sidewalk below. It's a truly epic moment, not just because Scissors accomplishes his resolution in the nick of time (and not because it made me squeal from how muscular Scissors is), but because it gives Paper the well-deserved karma the audience was waiting for him to receive. In any other episode, I would've considered this bit too cruel and harsh. But after seeing how Paper treated Scissors throughout the entire episode, never cutting him a break once, it's extremely satisfying to see that look of despair on his face after his calculator is destroyed. It was 100% deserved. Sorry, Paper, but when you mercilessly bully Scissors into a depression, my sympathy for you turns off like a lightswitch. As for Scissors, I couldn't be more proud of him. :)
Oh, and like most "Paper and Scissors" episodes, we get a few moments of...ahem..."friendship" that include the two making waffles for each other and frolicking in a meadow while holding hands.
...Tell me Papercut isn't canon. I dare you.
I love "The Susan," it's the best episode around!
LOL, it's not actually, but there is a lot to love about it. It's another one of those episodes that puts heart over humor and spoilers, every single one of my top 5 picks (with one exception) are ranked due to their sweeter moments.
So in this episode, Rock, Paper, and Scissors become the proud parents of...a car. No, seriously. Scissors literally calls himself and the others the car's "three dads," point blank. This show really is progressive, isn't it? Not only supporting gay romance, but polygamy as well? That's admirable.
All jokes aside, the trio are just trying to enter their car, named "The Susan" into a car show, believing "she" could win. However, they then fear that the Susan may not be good enough, so they give her a new look in order to fit in with the other, more impressive vehicles. This results in the Susan gaining sentience and acting like a bratty, rebellious teenager.
First of all, I love how the episode portrays each of the trio as a different type of parent: Rock is the paranoid, obsessive helicopter mom, Paper is the strict no-nonsense dictator, and Scissors is the "cool parent" who tries to relate to the kid and set an example, only to realize he's not a very good role model and run off to his room crying. Did I mention this man needs a hug?
Eventually, the Susan becomes so fed up with being micromanaged that she runs, or I guess drives away. The Rocham Bros find her trying to get onto a bus (LOL) and that's when we get the best part of the episode: a heartwarming montage of the trio being good dads to the Susan. Even though it's meant to not be taken too seriously because...well, it's a car, not a human being, let me tell you, it still hit me in the feels. You know a show is written well when characters' love for an inanimate object makes the audience teary-eyed.
The episode ends with the Rocham Bros entering the original "The Susan" into the car show in spite of their fear of losing. And here's where the writers could have decided to spoil everything by having everyone at the car show mock and jeer at the Susan for being different. But surprisingly, they go the opposite route. Instead, it turns out everyone loves the Susan and she's even awarded first place. Granted, it doesn't matter since the trio still think she's being insulted anyway and destroy her trophy, but the sentiment is still there.
Bottom line, this episode is just sweet. There's only one thing I didn't like about it and that was the decision to have the Susan lose her sentience in the end. Sure, that's what she wanted, but it kinda closes the door on future stories involving her. Oh well. Maybe she'll regain her voice one of these days.
This one is a must-watch every December. No matter what holiday you celebrate, this episode has a little something for everyone.
Not only do we have a touching message and tons of warm holiday fuzzies, but stellar comedy to boot, especially in the realms of referential humor. My favorite, of course, is the reference to the classic Nicktoon, Rocko's Modern Life. It's great because not only do they show Rock dressed as the titular character, but they have Scissors, who shares a voice actor with Rocko, give a flawless impression. It's the first time the show references another original Nick property and I can't help but love it. And before any of you say, "That's not true, they referenced TMNT before," I personally don't count that because TMNT wasn't a franchise originally created and owned by Nickelodeon (I don't count the "Spongebob" reaction videos either because those aren't part of the show proper).
Speaking of TMNT though, we get another call-back to "The Weekend Story" with the Rocham Bros. receiving holiday cards from the Pre-Teen Modified Martial Arts Tortoises and one of the pacifist pirates. Both of which Rock doesn't remember. And why would he? He wasn't there when Paper and Scissors met them! It's little details like that that show the writers care about and pay attention to what they write and that's something I can definitely appreciate.
But like with "The Susan," what really pushes this episode to a high ranking is the emotional moments. Rock calming Paper and Scissors down after they have another quarrel, Scissors dancing with an elderly woman at a retirement home (she's so lucky), and of course, the ending where the trio realize they don't need to try that hard to make their holiday photos perfect because they were perfect in their own special way and then invite all of their ghost friends to join the picture. Oh yeah, there's a lot of ghosts in this episode, most of which are references too. Pretty sure one of them is meant to be the girl from "The Ring," but we also get the Pac-man ghosts, which is pretty cool.
Something else I find admirable? The episode doesn't specifically say what holiday the Rocham Bros. are celebrating in an effort to be more inclusive to those who celebrate holidays other than Christmas. Sure, "Trash" eventually reveals the events of the episode took place on Christmas and they have a tree in their apartment, but those with a keen eye will notice a menorah on the coffee table. Meaning at least one of our beloved trio is Jewish. They don't say which one, however. My vote is on Paper. Not sure why, he just seems like he would be Jewish.
We all know the iconic quote by now: "Ow, my arm or something!"
Yep, this is the episode that gave us the memorable scene of Scissors faking injuries and suing people for it. And whether or not you watch it with context, it is always hilarious. Fun fact, after I watched the pilot episode on YouTube and was disappointed, I went ahead and watched the "special," if you can call it that, "Lights, Camera, Rock, Paper, Scissors!", which did not get a rank on here since all it is is a clip show and not a part of the actual series. But one of the clips shown was of the aforementioned lawsuit scene. And would you believe me if I told you that's the scene that got me into this series?
No joke, I laughed so hard when I watched that clip for the first time that I proceeded to play it over and over again. It still makes me laugh to this day and I easily consider it my favorite joke in the whole show. Now, it's not the funniest joke in the series, there's plenty others that beat it out, but it is the one I'm most likely to watch on loop.
Who'd have guessed the episode it came from would be just as entertaining?
As the title states, this is the episode where Scissors decides to make something of himself for once and, well, get a job. Unfortunately, the little guy is so hopeless at everything he tries, he starts to think he isn't good at anything...
WHY DO I RELATE TO THIS MAN SO MUCH?!
Believe it or not, I know just how Scissors feels in this episode. I can't tell you how many jobs I've applied for only to be rejected without being given a chance. Although in my case, it was more than likely because of my developmental disability rather than my lack of skills. Yeah, if you couldn't tell by my enthusiasm when talking about this show, I'm on the autism spectrum. How else do you think I'm able to complete fanfics over 100 chapters long? I'm so fixated on them I can't think of anything else! Thankfully, I do have a steady job now and it seems to be working well for me, so no need to worry about me having any financial troubles. Not that you ever needed to.
Back to the episode. Just like in "Resolutions," I can feel Scissors' pain here. For once, the guy wants to be a contributing member of society, and yet despite his best efforts, he ends up failing every time and getting fired for the tiniest of mistakes. Okay, the plane was kind of a big deal, but the other two bosses were very obviously overreacting. Speaking of that, remember that post I made about "Catscratch" and "Rock Paper Scissors" parallels? Yeah, there was an episode of "Catscratch" where the main characters had to get jobs and were repeatedly fired as well. I'm telling you, the resemblance is uncanny.
Anyway, this episode is definitely my favorite of the half-hour episodes, even though to this day, there are only three. As I mentioned at the beginning of this ranking, I don't think the season 2 premiere rose to the level of quality the other two half-hour specials did. That's just my opinion though.
If you guys pay attention to my tags, you'll know I've already point-blank stated this was my second-favorite episode of the show. I've stated my absolute favorite as well, so there shouldn't be any spoilers when I "reveal" my number one entry.
For now though, let's talk about "Paper's Book Club." First off, it's technically a "Paper vs the world" episode, which as we all know, I tend to not think highly of. However, this one works for two big reasons: number one, Paper is once again bringing his torment on himself by lying his way into the in-crowd. Yep, it's amazing how even though the guy supposedly learned how dangerous untruths can be, he still goes about telling them. Not sure if it's a case of Aesop Amnesia or just arrogance, though. Either way, it's clear Paper is obviously just going to continue lying to everyone, which makes it easier to be okay with his eventual downfall.
The second reason this episode is my second-favorite is the humor. This may well be the funniest episode in the entire show. As great as the lawsuit sequence in "Scissors Gets a Job" was, it was really the only scene I laughed at. This episode, however, we get laugh after laugh after laugh.
Like with "The First Lou Episode," there are a lot of fourth-wall jokes, aka my favorite type of comedy. And all of them are hits. The bit where Sandpaper mentions a movie being rushed and unfinished and she and Paper slowly morph into sketches of themselves? Genius. Scissors meeting with Nickelodeon at the end to discuss complaints from parents that are more than likely non-existent? Hilarious. And that intro where they replace Scissors with a rapping squirrel? Pure comedy gold.
But the jokes that don't involve shattering the fourth-wall are just as funny. Such as Paper being shown actually finishing a book...only to reveal it was all a dream (whoa, déjà vu). Or the random guy at the trio's door casually revealing that his wife left him and Rock and Scissors reacting accordingly. Also, Putty returns in this episode. And while he's awesome by himself, he really gets a moment to shine when at the end, he (along with Potato and Lou of all people) shows up Paper by uncharacteristically describing a complex book in great detail. And Paper's face at the end of his little spiel just makes it better.
Yeah, I can easily call this episode the best in terms of humor. And it would be my number one favorite overall...if not for one other episode. And if you've been following me for a while, you all know what it is...
#1: Helping with the Groceries
I cannot praise this episode enough. Everything about it is just perfect. The story. The jokes. The heart. The good moral. The fact that it's a "Scissors episode." I love it all.
As I mentioned before, this episode was unfortunately spoiled for me thanks to Nickelodeon's poor choices on what clips to release on YouTube. But even knowing the ending ahead of time didn't stop me from declaring this my favorite episode of the whole series.
In case you don't know, the entire thing takes place in the mind of Scissors as he contemplates life's greatest choice: whether or not to help his roommates bring in the groceries. It's here we meet the nice side of him (I knew he had one all along :)), who is determined to teach his compatriots that helping isn't the worst thing ever. Unfortunately, this proves to be not as easy as he thinks since everyone else in Scissors' brain has dedicated themselves to being as unhelpful as possible. Luckily, this doesn't deter "Nice Scissors" in the slightest, as he keeps relentlessly searching for a lost memory tape that proves Scissors' worth as a human being...er...pair of scissors. It's here we get our first glimpse at one of the main characters' childhoods and...OMG KID SCISSORS IS THE CUTEST THING EVER I JUST WANNA HUG HIM AND KISS HIM AND LOVE HIM FOREVER I KNOW I SAID I WAS DONE FANGIRLING BUT I CAN'T HELP IT HE'S SOOOOOO CUTE!!!!!!
In the end, "Nice Scissors" succeeds in not just finding the missing tape of our adorable little Scis helping a girl get ice cream, but persuading every other Scissors that helping feels good, once again proving that Scissors is more than a self-absorbed jerkass with an "It's All About Me" attitude. And once again, proving this show knows how to handle life-changing morals. The message this time around is handled flawlessly. It's presented in such a way that doesn't just encourage Scissors himself to be helpful, but the audience as well. And even though the episode states that Scissors isn't going to change his ways, it doesn't ruin an otherwise timeless aesop. It still wants you to take it seriously and take it to heart. Just pure brilliance.
We all knew before this episode existed that Carlos Alazraqui was a talented man who deserves the world. But the fact that he's committed enough to voice every single Scissors and essentially carry the whole episode beginning to end just proves how legendary he is.
I love this episode. I love Carlos Alazraqui. I love this show. And I love you, Scissors. No matter what anyone says, just keep being you.
So, there you have it. That was my ranking of every episode of "Rock Paper Scissors" from season 1. I may or may not do season 2 once all its episodes have aired, but I'm not promising anything because this was time-consuming as all hell. And I've procrastinated on my fanfics long enough, so...
Speaking of which, my Bad Guys 2 story has been completed and edited. First chapter will go up the first Friday in January, right after the holiday installments of "The Ghostly Trio and Molly McGee." I promise it's gonna be epic.
In the meantime, let me know if you agreed or disagreed with my opinions and what your personal favorite episode of this awesome series is in the comments. Until next time, have a merry Thanksgiving and a happy Black Friday!
