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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

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DEAR READER
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@repytospam
RE: Designing/Development
On Monday, June 22, 2015 10:19 AM, Nathan Hiemstra wrote:
Do you pronounce your name like "Jackson" or "Jason"?
I started spelling my name differently in in 9th grade I changed it from Nate to Nayt because on principle I dislike silent letters I think things should be intuitive for someone to understand with having to know a minimal amount of conteXtual (lol) information like when I was learning to read in school and found out that "ph" made the "f" sound I was upset and couldn't believe adults whom I already had a low opinion of could create such a flawed system but also I was forming my identity and it was eXhilarating to leave behind such a central convention as the spelling of my own name to underscore a core belief of mine even if it meant difficulty of explaining and correcting of pronunciation and spelling and ridicule from cynical and older kids from whom I was already experiencing bullying and I needed to prove to myself that I was willing to change anything about myself if it meant becoming the person I wanted to be and not the person my environment would have shaped me to be if I were passive now I don't really care about the spelling because I know who I am and I have proved to myself I can shape who I am but I like honoring the 9th grade version of myself and I told that to an author once who was writing my name while signing my book and he wrote "9th grade rules".
So What's the next step?
Nathan
On Wednesday, March 25, 2015 12:10 AM, Jaxon Gray wrote:
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Re: if you have Federal StudentL.....
On Jun 17, 2015, at 6:18 PM, Mary Mercado wrote:
Hello,
If you have Federal StudentLoans, you may qualify for any of the studentloan forgiveness programs.
Call 888-634-9403 to see which program is best for you.
You may be eligible for principal reduction, loanforgiveness, or a complete discharge depending on your individual circumstance.
Call us now at 888-634-9403 to find out if you qualify in 30 seconds.
Best regards,
StudentLoanForgiveness Team
888-634-9403
(M - F 9:00AM - 9:00PM)
On Jun 18, 2015, at 9:52 AM, Nathan Hiemstra wrote:
Dear Mary,
I think it’s so cool that your first and last name both begin with “M”, haha. If your middle initial is a vowel then, haha, who knows what it could spell! And it will certainly be a palindrome! Don’t thou think the word “palindrome" should be a palindrome? After all, the word “lisp” has a lisp in it. Does that make it a bit of an onomatopoeia?
What if we couldn’t talk? Trippy!
Anyway, I do have student loans but I don’t understand why you’re capitalizing those words and leaving out the space in between them (did you know that’s called "camel casing"? Is this the name of a specific loan? Because if it is, I’m sure I don’t have it, even though my student loan company changed their name recently. I’m not sure if I should call while I’m at work, could you just tell me if I qualify over email? I hope I do. For obvious reasons. Although, they say, no matter how much money you have, you always want more. But no one who’e ever said that gave me any money, so who knows if it’s true.
Anyway, I should be able to read any emails you send today, I’m not too busy at work. But if I don’t respond right away, don’t worry about it.
Later!
— Nathan
We wish to notify you again....................
On Feb 4, 2015, at 9:00 PM, NEWTON WEST wrote:
We wish to notify you again that you were listed as a beneficiary of a deceased client.
Please provide your contact details while replying to enable us process the release of the
Inheritance in your name.
Full details will be sent in our next email to you.
Yours faithfully,
Newton West
On Feb 5, 2015, at 9:46 AM, Nathan Hiemstra wrote: Was it Brandon? Nathan
On Feb 6, 2015, at 10:12 PM, NEWTON WEST wrote:
Thank you for your email response concerning the inheritance. We urgently need to present you to become the Administrator to the above Inheritance Estate. This would be done in accordance with the Inheritance Laws of United Kingdom by obtaining the Court validation paper as well as a Letter of Administration.
We have the responsibility to do this for without this process, the inheritance would be taking over by the Crown Court and released to the Government coffers. As soon as we get further response of your acceptance to receive this sum, we will forward to you all the relevant papers and forms by email or fax because we hope to finalize everything within the shortest possible time with your full co-operation.
However, the same United Kingdom inheritance law prevents an Attorney, Solicitor or Law Firm from being a beneficiary of an Estate of any client. Therefore, in plain words we are nominating you to accept the responsibility of becoming the Administrator of the estate, which is, receiving the Inheritance Estate of Twenty Three Million Four hundred thousand Great British Pounds , you will have 90% of the entire money while 10% of the total funds released by the bank will be mine (finder's fees).
The funds Twenty Three Million Four hundred thousand Great British Pounds belongs to one of our foreign client / customer who died as a result of severe heart attack. We cannot release the fund from his account unless someone applies for claim as the next-of-kin to the deceased as indicated in our judicial laws. Upon this discovery, we now seek your permission to have you stand as a next of kin to the deceased as all documentations will be carefully worked out by us for the funds to be released in your favor as the beneficiary / next of kin.
I am assuming that this is acceptable to you,as I will be forwarding in my next email what needs to be done.
I look forward to your prompt response.
Regards,
Newton West
+44 745 224 0140
On Feb 10, 2015, at 9:30 AM, Nathan Hiemstra wrote: Oh my God, NEWTON, I can’t believe Brandon is dead. Did you know him? I’m not sure if I know who he is, I think I heard about him at a family reunion once though. His children lived here in the United States and two of them killed someone and went to jail! Can you believe it? I wonder if they know. I guess you can’t inherit money if you’re in jail or you would have contacted them. I’ve always wanted Great British Pounds! That sound alike a lot. Is it? What does it equal in dollars? I hope it’s not one of those crazy currencies where like a millions gondozonkas equals one penny. Why don’t they just make all money be worth the same amount. It would be so much easier. Well, I don’t want to get my hopes up because last time I did it rained and the fair was canceled and it was the last day. Why did I wait?!?! I’m not waiting this time, even if Twenty Three Million Four hundred thousand Great British Pounds only equals $20. Please tell me what to do next and what else. Nathan
Re: Represent Your Country in a Global Networking Community
So, your name is “JT”? What does that stand for? Is that because you’ve got the same name as your dad and it was too confusing at your house growing up? I always thought it was kind of self indulgent to name someone after themselves. But my step dad was so selfish I have this thing about being so unselfish so maybe I’m being too hard on myself, and therefore too hard on other people, and so the cycle continues. Crap! Lol! So, “Jerry Terry” (I just made that up), what was your dad like growing up? What does he think of what you do for a living? It sounds like you really want to help people. Does he think that’s cool? Did you grow up whit color? My friend’s kid’s dad comes home from work in a white shirt and tie and hugs their kid and it seems so weird to me to see that because no one in a tie ever hugged me. Except maybe my grandpa, he wore a tie to church and to birthday parties, which I thought was excessive. Not his hugs, though, they weren’t excessive, I could never get too much of those. He was more of a dad to me than my step dad. I bet you can’t related. I guess I can see wearing a tie to church, but I never wanted to dress up. Once I got into fight with my grandma over it. I said “If we’re going to God’s house, why wouldn’t he want me to wear my favorite shirt?” (Which was a jersey). She said, “Well, we’re dressing up for the other people.” Which, was honest. But yet another example of how I thought the adult world had it all wrong.
Write back soon,
Nathan
From: JT Richards <[email protected]> Subject: Represent Your Country in a Global Networking Community Date: Sep 14, 2014, at 9:36 PM
Hello,
As you are more than likely aware, you were recently selected for inclusion in the new 2014 edition of the Who' s Who Among Executives and Professionals.
Despite our efforts, we have not yet received confirmation of your biographical profile, and are reaching out to you again in an effort to do so.
Click here to verify and confirm your profile
The tradition of the Who' s Who reaches back more than 100 years to a time when the prestigious and accomplished were featured in a yearly publication that defined high society.
Today, the Who' s Who provides a useful resource where business professionals, academics, and Executives are both recognized for their achievements and provided with an unparalleled networking resource. Using our database, you can make global contacts, discuss current events and happenings with your peers, and establish yourself as either a mentor to aspiring professionals or further your business network.
Our goal is to seek out the premier executives and professionals throughout the world. There is absolutely no cost or obligation for your biographical profile. Simply click this link and fill out the appropriate biographical fields.
Sincerely,
Nomination Committee, Research Division Who' s Who Among Executives and Professionals
To change your communication options please click this link or write to:
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Ram
Hi “Ram”,
Haha, has anyone told you what “Ram” means in English? Yes, please make my website in the top 10. I would prefer it. Please send me a list.
Thanks,
Nathan
Weird Food
Dear Paul,
I can see how important this weird food was for saving your life! But which food did you set it in the hospital? Normal food or this weird food? Did the doctor’s think it was weird or was he or she used to it the way they are used to seeing people naked? Does the food taste weird too?
My God to you and your son “Ken”. Please help me understand more when you get a chance and write me back.
With great interest,
Nathan