S u n k i s s e d @rinikeumala - Tumblr Blog

He looked into my eyes, and teared up.

"Why?" I asked.

"I love you."

There were nights, when you came home after long evenings teaching Quran. I could hear you unlocking our room's door from outside and then greeted me with a smile. You put your keys and took off your watch -the one I gifted that you always wear-, washed your hands on the wastafel and came to me -I'd be ofc already on the bed, because it'd have been late at night-, you hugged me and said,

"Hmm, I feel so calmed here. This is my safest place."

and I don't know how not to fall for you every night...

I cried today. For so many reasons.

Like always, he came and and opened his arms. He caressed my back, my hair, my arms, and asked, "Why? What happened, love?" He looked at me with his worried eyes.

"Nothing". I couldn't even hear my voice. I choked at my own 'nothing'.

He embraced me tigher as my tears kept falling down and they touched his bare shoulder.

"It's wet." I said it between my weeps.

"It's okay. Cry if you want to cry."

I kept crying, and moved my head to see his face. I looked at his eyes, but I guess my heart wasn't ready when I saw his red eyes with a tear falling down from each of them.

I hugged him again, and cried.

After a few seconds, I tilted my head to check if his eyes were still reddish.

They were. And he wiped the tears on the corner of his eyes.

"You look sad. I'm sorry." I said.

"I am sad if you are sad."

***

Is it late that only now do I realize that we are one, now?

It's us.

Embraced by the cold, and then you...

I remember I used to say I love how my skin felt being held by the winter cold, it’s I am being embraced so dearly, by my favorite season. Yet now I can’t seem to remember that feeling anymore.

Perhaps because being in your wide and warm arms are all that I long for every single day now, no matter in which season..

It resonates... (2)

“I was softer after you.

Not just with the world

but with

myself.”

You kissed my imperfections every morning because you knew I never would.

-- L.E. Bowman // The Evolution of a Girl

It resonates...

"I find my place

In between your arms,

In between your tender kisses

And soft whispers of ‘It will be alright’,

In between the warmth of your embrace,

and the scent of your neck,

and the fierceness of your touch,

I find my place lost inside your soul."

— cynthia go // Home

How can I not melt at you, even when you are angry, you remain soft-spoken. You lower your voice like I am a baby who needs a long sleep.

Your patience is cosmic. The way you teach me when I take a wrong step, I can do nothing except fall in love with you deeply.

I saw tears from his eyes this morning.

"I'm sorry," he said.

"No, I should be sorry, I made you cry." I said.

Then he kept crying like a little child. I hugged him tigher and stroke his hair slowly.

In the long embrace, he whispered, "I am sad for not being able to understand your need. I know your condition and what you are going through for our baby, but I'm still lacking. I couldn't be what you need. I'm sorry."

7 April.

I found out we're expecting a new soul in our life.

I love you,

and I love you.

Prayers of Love

Yesterday we were out for a gathering at a beach with my big family. Going home, we were super tired from all the fun and chit-chat with people so we went to bed for a nap right away. You laid down first. Even though tired and sleepy, like usual, I still play around with you and laid down on top of your body and fell asleep in a second with my head on top of your chest. After what I thought, perhaps, a minute or two, or five, I vaguely hear your voice with your lips close to my ears.

“Yaa Rabb, I pray to You that my love is always in a good health, be better in her already nice manner, always remember You in good and bad situation, and...”

I didn’t catch all of what you were saying because I was all drowsy, but I could remember I silently said “Aamiin” after each all of your heartful and beautiful prayers.

You smile after each prayer we do, whether in the mosques or at home.

And I still don't find that smile, today.

And it's aching me.

That one evening when you are leaving our room, I asked, "Do I get my hug?"

You smiled. But it didn't reach your eyes.

Then you just left.

Please, handle with care

Can you tell me how to handle that delicate heart of yours?

Tell me. I promise I would sit next to you and listen to your voice all my life.

A Man Within My Soul

If I said that you were, have been, are, and will always be, my soul, would you believe it?

In you, my heart is anchored,

In you, my soul resides.

Not half, but all of it.

***

When we are apart like this, with your delicate heart I’ve torn to shreds, how do you think my soul is, now?

ripped apart; shattered.

I doubled my pain, on my own.

You've got a heart as big as the sun.

How painful were my words to have hurt that big heart of yours?

In our dark room, in silence, I made you cry last night.

I don't deserve you.

Forever ain't enough. I'm honored you're mine.

On one warm morning in January, I woke up and looked at you who was lying down peacefully by my side. You were drenched in a cold sweat. I put my hand on your arm and whispered your name in your ear. You woke up, and I said, "You are like a morning dew." I was greeted with the warmest smile I'd ever seen in my life.

On one rainy evening in February, we were in line for our evening snacks at a street food kiosk, under the rain. Inside the raincoat, I was standing next to you, waiting patiently. My face was rained upon. You looked at me with a smile and said, "Your face under the rain shines like a crystal." Before I realized it, the butterfly in my stomach have already been kicking around and I smiled from ear to ear. And you rained me with the brightest smile I've ever seen in my life.

Trending Blogs

Recently Viewed Blogs

S u n k i s s e d